A World in a Grain of Sand
by The Wanlorn
Summary: PG13 to be safe. COMPLETE. A sequel to 'Every New Beginning'. Eventually to be something of a crossover, I think. Nick/Nat romance. R/R/E
1. A Disturbing Case

**A World in a Grain of Sand**

**Chapter One**

(A/N:  This is a sequel to 'Every New Beginning Come From Some Other'- ah, screw it.  This is the sequel to 'Every New Beginning'.  As I write this first chapter, I am sick, so… No plot as of yet.  It might be just one of those 'life's lessons learned' things.  R/R/E, please!)

Disclaimer:  Sydney is mine, as well as her family.  So's the bartender…Carla…Anita… Kane…I do believe this is it for this chapter.  The rest belong to…those people who own 'Forever Knight'.  For some reason I have JJ Abrams stuck in my head, but that's 'Alias'.  I think.

            Vachon strummed a couple chords on his guitar, watching Tracy intently.  She was far away, off in her own little world.  He wondered what she was thinking about.  Since he had brought her across, they had grown so much closer, in every way.  Usually, when he started playing, she snapped out of it to listen intently to the beautiful music.  But not this time.

            Vachon put down his guitar and picked up a bottle of bloodwine, pouring a glass for each of them.  He stood up, a glass in each hand, and walked over to her, setting one down in front of her.  Whatever she was thinking about must be deep.

            "Care to share?" he asked quietly, pushing a bit of love through their link.  She looked up at him and smiled slightly.

            "Sorry, Vachon.  I was just thinking…I don't even know _what_ I was thinking."  She sent a jumble of emotions to him, so he would understand.

            If Vachon had to sum it up, he would say that is had finally hit home that she would live forever and everyone else she knew (the mortals at least) wouldn't.  He felt a brief pang of regret - he wanted her to be happy.  But she _was_ happy, merely a bit saddened by the realization.

            He pulled her into his arms, hugging her tight.  "I'm sorry, Trace.  'A vampire's heart must be cold'," he quoted to her.  "At least, when it comes to mortals."

            Tracy nodded.  It's not that she wasn't happy, she was.  It was just a bit…shocking.  "I know.  It will just take some getting used to."

            "It happens quicker than you think."  Vachon ran his fingers through her straight blonde hair.  "You're going back to work tomorrow.  Do you feel ready?"  As her Master, he knew she was ready.  But that didn't mean _she_ felt like she was.

            "I think I am.  My father's getting antsy to have me back at work again."  She had…'convince' him to stop trying to get her to change jobs because this one was 'too dangerous'.  He had tried once before, for a different reason.  It hadn't worked then, and it wouldn't work now.

            Vachon kissed her lightly, and nuzzled her cheek.  "It's almost dawn.  Are you staying here the day?"

            Tracy shook her head.  "I'd never get to work tomorrow if I did."  She laughed at his lecherous grin.

            Vachon walked her down to her car.  She was still the same old perky Tracy, even after being brought to the darkness.  He kissed her once more before she got into her car and drove off.

~~~~{@

            Nick hummed happily as he sat at his desk in the precinct, doing paperwork for his latest finished case.  He had many things to be happy about.  The 'guardian angels' had been right about the blood.  Natalie had moved in with him.  Tracy was coming back to work today.

            "Oh my God, it's one of the signs of the Apocalypse."  Speak of the devil.  "He's humming and smiling _while_ he's doing _paperwork_."

            "Tracy!"  Nick quickly stood up, his smile growing, and hugged her.  "How are you?  You look great?"  Nick didn't know how he had missed the rigmarole that must have started when she came in.

            She rolled her eyes and dragged a chair over to sit with him.  "I came back expecting to have piles of paperwork to do.  What gives?  What'd you do with the _real_ Nick?"  She took a closer look at his face.  He was looking _much_ healthier.  For the past year, he had looked like he was slowly wasting away, but she hadn't wanted to ask him about it.  After she had found out he was a vampire, she had asked Vachon.  He had told her that if a vampire was stressed, or not feeling well, or anything like that, their faces reflected it, just like a mortal's.

            "Eh," he said, waving his hand dismissively.  "Just be thankful I've changed."

            She laughed, as perky as ever.  "So, are we on desk duty?"  She had been doing good so far, blocking out the mortals' heartbeats.  She was glad that Vachon had told her to fill herself going in.

            Nick shook his head, putting down the form and standing up.  "Nope.  I was just waiting for you.  Did you see Reese yet?"

            Tracy nodded and laughed.  "You've been off in your own little world for a while there, Nick."

            "Sorry, Trace."  He grinned sheepishly.

            They drove through the streets of Toronto for a little more than an hour.  They had talked many times since the night she was brought across and tonight.  Nick had known that they needed to come to an understanding before she came back.  Without that, they couldn't function as partners.  He was sure that they had.  How ironic was this?  The only two vampires on the police force, partners.

            "81 Kilo.  Respond, 81 Kilo."  The radio snapped him out of his daze.

            Tracy got it.  "This is 81 Kilo responding…"

~~~~{@

            "What've you got for us, Nat?"  They were in a park, far off on the wayside.

            "Female, early thirties, dead for about a week.  A jogger found her and called 911 from a cell phone.  He's over there, being questioned.  I'll know more once I get her back to the morgue."  She watched sadly as the people zipped up the body bag and loaded the dead weight into the coroner's wagon.

            Nick saw the look and quickly hugged her.  "You okay?"  Tracy headed over to question the jogger, knowing Nick would come join her.

            Natalie shut her eyes for a moment, welcoming the comfort of his embrace.  "Yeah.  It's just been a _long_ shift, and it's barely two hours old."

            Nick kissed the side of her head.  "Tracy's giving me the death look.  I think I'm supposed to be over there, not cuddling with you.  Don't let them make you stay late tonight, okay?"

            Natalie nodded, then gave him a little push towards Tracy.  "Go.  I don't need my boyfriend to be staked by his partner."

            Nick laughed as he went to join the questioning.

~~~~{@

            Natalie wearily rode the lift up to the loft.  It was past dawn, and she was bone tired.  Although Nick had told her not to let 'them' make her stay later, and she had left the crime scene with just those intentions, things just kept coming up.

            When the door opened, tears sprang into Natalie's eyes.  Nick had dimmed the lights throughout the loft, and candles flickered on the kitchen table.  He had laid out a fine meal for her, immediately brightening up her day.  She loved him so much!

            Nick descended the stairs, a smile shining on his face.  "Ah, milady graces me with her beautiful presence."  It wasn't said with malice; rather his voice was filled with love.

            He crossed the room and kissed her gently.  Then he took her face in his hands, gently smoothing cut all the tension.  "I made you some dinner.  Hungry?"

            She nodded silently, afraid that she would start to cry if she opened her mouth.  To say it had been a long shift was like saying forever was a little while.  Nick seemed to understand.  He pulled out her chair for her and pushed it in as she sat down.  Then he filled her glass with wine and sat down in his seat.

            Natalie took a small bite of meat, not sure if it would stay down.  But she savored the taste in her mouth, anyway.  Nick had always claimed he couldn't cook, because he didn't need to.  Of course, as she had recently found out, he _could_ cook, and very well.  If she was going to start puking, she at least wanted the memory of the taste.

            Nick let her get halfway through her meal in silence; intuitively knowing she needed the silence.  She felt quietly for keeping silent, but couldn't trust herself to open her mouth.  She had woken up, feeling depressed and angry for no reason, and the day had progressively gotten worse from there.

            Nick took a sip of his bloodwine, finishing off the glass.  As he set it down, he covered her hand with his own, rubbing his thumb back and forth across the back of her hand.

            "Are you okay, Nat?" he asked softly.

            She nodded quickly, taking another bite and looking down at her plate.  She was tired; she didn't want to burden Nick with her tiny troubles tonight.

            Nick didn't buy it.  "Do you want to talk about it?"

            Natalie shook her head.  "It was just a long day," she said quietly.

            Nick still didn't believe her, but he didn't press it.  She would talk with him when she was ready.  He hoped.  "What if I draw you up a bubble bath?" he asked quietly.

            She nodded again.  "Thank you, Nick."

            Nick stood up and walked around the table to her, kissing the top of her head.  "When you're done, just leave everything there and come up.  I'll take care of everything later."

            Once he saw Natalie nod, he went upstairs to the bathroom off the bedroom.  He had learned how hot Natalie liked her bathwater, and what it would feel like on his skin, so he was able to get it quickly to the right temperature.  As he waited for it to fill, he looked around the bathroom.  It was so changed from when he lived alone.  Instead of being relatively empty, Natalie's stuff lined the sink and medicine cabinet.  He left and opened the linen closet, pulling out some ivory-colored candles.  He set them around the bathroom, lighting each one.  Judging the tub to be full enough, he turned off the water.  Natalie appeared in the door just on time, as if by magic.  She began undressing, unabashedly, in front of him.  She grinned as she took note of the candles.

            "Do you want me to stay and wash your back?" Nick asked, taking her clothes and drinking in the sight of her body.

            Natalie nodded as she eased herself into the tub, happily sighing.  Nick drew the best baths she had ever had.  He somehow knew how to get the perfect temperature. The bubbles tickled her chin, already starting to slowly disappear.  Nick knelt by the tub, crossing his arms on the edge and resting his chin on them.  He smiled slightly, watching as Natalie closed her eyes to savor the relaxing heat.  She was so beautiful, and he couldn't believe she was his.  Or that he was hers.

            After a time, he reached out with one hand, gently smoothing back her hair.  "Are you okay, Nat?" he asked quietly.

            "The Jane Doe in the park," she said equally as quiet.  "Sydney Brookman, 32.  A husband and two kids.  Tortured, raped, and murdered…  She was two months pregnant.  Jesus, Nick!  She was _pregnant_!  Then, of course, there's the five car pileup that came in just before, and the leftovers from the dayshift…" She fell silent, choking back tears.

            The entire thing clicked into place for Nick right then.  He knew she had woken up late, the toaster had broken, there was no milk for her coffee, and she had run out of shampoo.  So her day already started off bad, and when she got to work, she got the 'leftovers' that she hated.  Major car accidents always stressed her out, and this newest case was indeed disturbing.  He scooped up some water with his hands, letting it drip down her shoulders.  Guilt struck him as he found a sponge he could gently massage her shoulders with.  As long as she was with him, she could never have children of her own.  Seeing the young lives lost that she could never have must be hard on her.  Perhaps it would be better if…

            "Whatever you're thinking, stop it."  Natalie's voice snapped him out of his thoughts.  She had opened her eyes at his silence, and could see what he was thinking clearly written across his face.  As his hand paused in the air, she nuzzled it with her cheek.  "I need you right now, Nick, okay?  Not your unfounded guilt."

            "Sorry Nat," he said quietly, shoving everything back inside of himself.  He dunked the sponge in the water and began running it across her shoulders and the back of her neck.  She sighed happily, closing her eyes once more.

            When she was done relaxing, she got out and Nick wrapped her in a giant fluffy towel.  Knowing she probably wanted to be alone for a bit, he dropped a couple kisses down her neck and said, "I'll be waiting for you in the bedroom."

            Natalie turned around in his arms, brushing a lock of wet hair off her face.  "I'm exhausted, Nick," she said quietly, sadly.

            Nick smiled and dropped a kiss to the tip of her nose.  "I know.  The only thing I had planned was sleep.  But that doesn't mean I won't be waiting for you to be in my arms before I can fall asleep."

            His lips met hers for a soft kiss before he stepped away and existed into their bedroom.  He took off his clothes and put them in the laundry pile, then stepped into his black silk pajamas.  Then he laid out hers and turned down her side of the bed.  Gazing around the room, wondering if there was anything else he could do for her, he finally decided just to get under the satin sheets and wait for Natalie.

            When she finally appeared and put on her pajamas, she wearily climbed into bed next to him.  Nick curled his body protectively around her, fitting like one spoon next to each other.  He pulled up the covers to her chin, one arm going around and snuggling her close.  Soon, they were both asleep.

~~~~{@

            When Nick woke up the next morning, Natalie's face was pressed against his chest.  He could feel the heat of her forehead through the silky material.  Apparently, on top of everything else, she had caught the flu bug that had been going around the precinct and the morgue.  He gently eased himself out of the bed and her embrace, carefully covering her up again.  Of course, as soon as his cool body left her side, her eyes blearily opened.

            Nick bent over her, touching her forehead with his wrist.  "Go back to sleep, Nat.  You feel like you've got the flu that's been going around."

            "Okay Nick," she rasped.  Her head hurt, her throat hurt, her body hurt.  "Call me in?"

            He pressed cool lips to her forehead.  "Sure.  I'll bring you up some Tylenol and a glass of water too, okay?"

            He didn't expect an answer, and didn't get one.  Downstairs, he filled up a tall glass and grabbed the bottle of Tylenol, leaving them on the nightstand when he went back to the bedroom.  He called her in sick as he got ready.  She was already sound asleep.  Less than half an hour later, he was at the precinct.

            Tracy hit him with the bad news as soon as he sat down at his desk.  They would be out in the car later.  "They found two more, Nick.  Same MO, similar-looking girls.  We think we've got a serial."

            "What?  Use enough details to make sense, Trace."  He felt a sinking sensation at the thought that it was probably the torture-rape-murder case she was talking about.

            "The one in the park last night.  Day shift found two more, similar places, today.  Both were raped, mutilated, and murdered.  Once again, early thirties, female, and _no clues anywhere_."

            Nick sighed, actually glad Natalie was sick, so she did not have to deal with this.  "So we're…"

            Tracy tossed a paper down in front of him.  "Going where the three were last seen.  We already have the places right here."

            "Pictures of the victims?" he asked.  She dropped those in front of him.  He riffled quickly through them.  Tracy had been right about the similarity in the victims.  All three were small, with curly brown hair and proportionally similar.  His mind made an immediate connection, which he quickly shoved away and buried.

            He looked over the list of places.  There was nothing there that was related to any of the others.  But perhaps if they worked backwards, tracing their movements… And they would have to check out people in common…

            "Let's go, Trace."

~~~~{@

            Nick called Natalie from his cell phone as they drove to the last location - a bar.  The previous places had been totally fruitless.  One last chance for an easy solution.

            His answering machine picked up.  "Hey Nat.  It's just me checking up on you.  See you when my shift's over."

            He hung up as he pulled into a semi-full parking lot.  He glanced over at Tracy as they got out.  She would circle the inside of the place, asking people.  He'd ask the bartender.  It was relatively nice inside, and the two vampires immediately split up.

            Nick held out a picture of the woman associated with this place to the bartender.  "Do you recognize her?"

            The man took it.  "Sure.  Carla.  A regular until about a week or two ago, when she pretty much disappeared."

            This was a first - the other places appeared to be just random stops by the other two women.  "How about this one?"

            "And that would be Anita.  She stopped coming in a month ago."

            This looked to be a good one.  Carla had died last, Anita first.  Now the bartender just had to put Sydney in the middle.  "And her?"

            "Sydney.  Regular until two and a half weeks ago.  Why?"

            "And you were never suspicious when these people just stopped coming?"

            "A new club opened up down the street.  I figured that's where they went.  Why?"

            "They're dead," Nick said bluntly, scanning for Tracy.

            "Ah, Jesus.  They were sweet people."  The man seemed genuinely saddened by their deaths.

            "All right.  Was there any other regular they were seen with?  Or anyone else?  Who were they last seen with here?  Do you remember?"

            "Of course I do.  Kane.  All the women hang around Kane.  But, he hasn't been in for a couple days."

            Nick nodded.  "Do you know where Kane lives?  Or a last name?"

            The bartender looked thoughtful.  "Address, no.  But last name… it started with a 'b'… 'b'…buh…beh…behl…Belasarius!  That's it.  Kane Belasarius.  You think he might be dead, too?"

            "Maybe," Nick said cautiously, signaling for Tracy.  More likely, it was he who was doing the killings, if he had disappeared too.  "Thanks for the info."

            When he and Tracy were back in the Caddy, he turned to her, asking, "How'd they ID the latest two victims?"

            "Missing persons, and had the families come in to make sure.  Why?"

            "Let me guess - a month, two and a half weeks, and a week or two that they've been missing."

            Tracy nodded.  "Yep."

            "Well, now we're looking of a Kane Belasarius."  Nick put the Caddy in drive and began to head back to the precinct.

~~~~{@

            Nick dropped his coat on the back of a chair at the kitchen table.  He could see Natalie, curled up on the couch with an afghan across her legs, watching the early morning news.  He sat down next to her, pulling her into his arms.

            "How are you feeling?" he asked her quietly.  She still felt hot in his arms.

            "How do you think?" she snapped in a hoarse voice, even though she was glad he was home.  Immediately regretful, she apologized, "Sorry Nick.  The flu sucks.  Be glad _you_ can't get it."

            Nick lay his cool cheek on her hot forehead as she cuddled in his side.  "That's okay.  Do you need anything?"

            "No.  Yes.  No.  No," she finally said decisively.

            "Are you sure?" Nick smiled slightly.  "What was the yes going to be?"

            "Water, but…"

            Nick got up, kissing her forehead.  "Coming right up, love."  He filled one of her glasses in the sink and brought it back over to her.

            She sipped the cold liquid slowly.  "Thanks."

            "How long have you been up?" Nick asked as she yawned.

            "Not long enough to be this tired," she said dryly.

            Nick scooped her up in his arms, ignoring her weak protests.  "To bed with you then," he said, laughing as he carried her up the stairs.  She rested her head on his chest after minimal resistance.  When Nick came in, she had already been falling asleep on the couch, now she was falling asleep in his arms.  He deposited her gently on the bed, seeing that she was already half asleep.  He debated for a second whether he wanted to sleep right then, too.  Natalie had pulled the blankets up high around herself, and was already asleep.

            He went back downstairs to feed, downing almost an entire bottle.  Then he quickly picked up the loft as the shutters kicked in.  As soon as that was done, he went back upstairs to their bedroom.  As he changed into his black silk pajamas, he watched his Natalie.  She was tossing and turning in the bed, beads of sweat on her face.

            If he took off the sheets, he knew she would be freezing within minutes.  That was the nature of the flu.  So, he got under the covers with her, curling his body around hers.  She immediately rolled over to face him, still sound asleep.  Carefully, he smoothed back her hair, trying not to wake her.  He hated seeing her sick, but knew that there was nothing he could do to help her other than let nature run its course.

(A/N:  Well, in the course of writing this, I've got the main events of pretty much the entire thing planned out, I just have to hope I remember them long enough to write them down… So, you people want some cruel (that is, cruel if you actually _enjoyed_ the chapter) for the rest of it?  Though, be warned, it takes me a while to write cuz I've got about six tales going on from at least as many fandoms…Oh yeah!  And the title is from a poem by William Blake - 'Auguries of Innocence'.  I _highly_ recommend you peoples read it, it is _wicked awesome_!  It's even better than 'Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came' and 'Jabberwocky' (and a different style), which is saying a lot, coming from me.  Thanks for reading, I hope you review, and I pray you enjoyed.  Hey, people, please tell me if you do actually want the next chapter?  I'm not going to waste my time on something no one will read…)

(P/A/N:  Did I mention how I had this _awesome_ idea for a type of vampire, and then I read this fic, and someone else had already come up with the _exact same thing_ and called them Aberrants, or something like that??  Can you say annoying??  Grrr…)


	2. Suspect Found

**Chapter Two**

(A/N:  Oo!  I think I got almost the whole thing planned out!  This finally has a plot! I am so excited!  R/R/E!!)

Disclaimer:  Abel Belasarius belongs to me, too.  The nameless victims are mine.  Umm…the previous disclaimer… disclaims the rest of them.

            "He doesn't have a record, at least," Tracy said, trying to cheer Nick up.

            He glared morosely at his desk.  Kane Belasarius apparently did not exist.  No record, no registry in the DMV.  No social securituy.  Nothing.  And there were another three bodies already, from the same bar.  Nick had gone back and got a list of all the regulars who stopped coming.  This was driving him crazy.

            "We don't _know_ that because it's obviously a fake name," he snapped.

            "Don't snap at _me.  It's not my fault.  It's probably spelled wrong, or something.  They're running different spellings right now."_

            "I'm sorry, Trace."  Nick dropped his head into his hands.  They had already gone through _everything, searched for clues, and there was nothing.  It had been a weeks since they had found the first body.  The Commissioner was getting antsy.  They had already run the different spellings, done everything._

            He suddenly jerked up.  "Wait a sec!  How are they running it?  Specifics, or just last name?"

            "Specifics.  Why?"

            "Did they try spelling Kane differently?"

            Tracy's eyes widened.  "Oh my God, we're all idiots!"

            "Can't see the forest for the trees," Nick agreed.  "So go check."

            Tracy was back within five minutes, waving a paper in the air.  "Got it!  Address, picture, everything!  Let's go!"

            They were at the house within twenty minutes.  It was a little white house, in a nice neighborhood.  Not the home of a suspected serial killer.  So far, due to lack of evidence, he was still their only suspect.  Of course, they had almost nothing on him.  Nick knocked on the door, glad that it was still early in the night and they could do this.

            The door opened immediately.  "How can I help you?" a man asked.  He was relatively young, with close-cropped black hair.  Bright blue eyes looked out from a boyish face, set on top of a lithe, wiry body.  He was a relatively short man, shorter than Tracy, but taller than Natalie.

            Nick flashed his badge.  "Detective Nick Knight and Tracy Vetter, Metro Police.  Are you Kane Belasarius?"

            "No, I'm his brother Abel.  Why?"

            Tracy's eyes widened slightly as she fought down a grin.  "We need to talk to him.  Does he live here?"

            "Yeah."  Abel closed the door slightly to take off the chain and open it.  "Come on in.  He'll be back in a couple minutes."  He glanced back as they followed him in, smiling brightly.  "Go ahead and laugh about the names now, before he gets home.  Our parents were a bit…religious."

            Nick allowed his eyes to sparkle, while Tracy laughed outright.  "I'm sorry.  It's not funny, but it is.  Are you the younger one, too?"

            "Of course!  If you're going to bite the fruit, why not eat the whole thing, right?  Hopefully, I'll escape the fate of the original Abel, though."  White teeth sparkled from his smiling mouth before fading away.  "Is my brother in trouble?  What has he done?"

            "Nothing," Nick assured him.  "We just need to ask him a couple questions.  Hopefully he can be of some assistance to us."

            "Do you want coffee or something while you wait?"

            Both shook their heads no thank you.  Seconds later, the other brother walked through the door.  He looked exactly like the younger one, only taller - a couple inches taller than Nick.

            "Is supper done yet, brother?"  He noticed the two people.  "Who are they?"

            "Kane Belasarius?" Nick asked, flashing his badge again.  "Detective Nick Knight, Metro PD, and my partner, Tracy Vetter."

            "What's the problem, Detectives?"  Kane took off his black overcoat and handed it to his brother, who disappeared to put it away.

            "Do you recognize her?"  Tracy held out a picture of Sydney.

            Kane took it, studying it for a brief moment before handing it back.  "Sure.  That's one of the girls at a club I go to.  Why?"  Nick could detect a slight increase in his heart rate.

            "Do you know these?" Tracy asked, giving him the pictures.  His response was affirmative to all of them.

            Abel came in with a cup of coffee, handing it to Kane.  "Would you like a cup?" he asked of Nick and Tracy as Kane took a sip.

            As they replied no, Kane shoved the cup back at Abel.  "There's not enough sugar.  How many times does it take to get it right?" he asked crossly.

            Abel took the cup and retreated from the room, his eyes down.  "Sorry, Kane."

            Tracy and Nick shared a glance.  Nick took out his pad with a list of the exact dates that the women had disappeared.

            "Okay.  I'm going to need to know where you were on these dates."  Nick read them off, hoping this would be easy and Kane wouldn't want a lawyer.

            He could hear the man getting slightly more nervous.  This was almost positively who had done it.

            "I was here all day on each of them.  Abel can verify that."  He called out to his brother.  "Abel!  Get in here!  And where's my coffee?  Why do you need to know?"

            The younger man appeared almost instantly, coffee in hand.  "Here you are, brother," he said nervously.

            "All of those women are dead, and we're investigating their murder.  Where was Kane on these dates?"  Nick read them off again.

            "At home," Abel said after a moment of thought.  "Why?  Is he a suspect?"

            "There's not enough evidence for him to be a suspect," Tracy said.

            Kane nodded, and Abel retreated again.  Nick and Tracy asked a few more questions, before thanking the two men and leaving.  Tracy waited for Nick to start the Caddy and begin driving before speaking.

            "Did you see all the SM stuff in the other room?"

            "That doesn't automatically make someone a criminal, Trace."

            "No, but the victims _were tortured.  So Mr. Kane Belasarius does have ready access to the tools needed.  Of course, so does his brother.  Abel was the more nervous of the two."_

            Nick glanced at her.  "Yes, but I would guess he was afraid of his brother.  Did you notice the change in attitude when Kane returned?"

            "Mm.  Abel seemed to like people more than his brother…"

            "I'd say too timid to achieve the brutality needed for the marks on the victims.  I wouldn't put it past Kane, though…"

            Tracy shuddered.  "I bet he uses some of that stuff on his brother.  But why would _anyone…"_

            Nick shrugged.  "Some people like it.  I did catch some fading bruises."

            Tracy shuddered again.  "I don't like this case.  I hope we find enough evidence that it was him, or find someone else, so this all stops."

            "So do I, Trace.  So do I."

~~~~{@

            The buzzing of the alarm woke Natalie from her deep sleep.  She slapped it off and sat up, gently removing Nick's arm from across her stomach.  She finally felt better enough to go back to work.  Moving carefully, so as not to wake Nick, she got clothes from the closet and went to the bathroom to take a shower.

            The droning of the water woke Nick up.  He knew better than to start an argument with Natalie over whether she should stay home for another day or not. She usually went in even if she _was sick, so this was a miracle that she had taken a week of sick leave.  He got out of bed and padded downstairs to start her some coffee._

            When Natalie left the bathroom, the smell of coffee assailed her nostrils.  She smiled, knowing Nick had gone down and started her some.  She was glad she wasn't going to have to fight him on going back to the morgue.  He tended to be over-protective and treat every illness of hers as life threatening.  At times, it was sweet, but today it would have driven her crazy.

            When Natalie came down the stairs, Nick was leaning against the counter, sipping from his own mug.  She stood up on tiptoe, kissing his cheek.

            "Thanks for making the coffee, Nick."

            "You're welcome, Nat."  Nick watched as she moved around the kitchen, making breakfast.  Some days, it was hard to believe that she was living in the loft with him, that she was sleeping in his bed with him, that they were pretty much married in all but name.  He kept expecting something to interrupt their idyllic existence.  Lacroix had been unusually quiet, not seeming to have noticed that Natalie was living with Nick.  But the Crusader knew that he must know, and was beginning to worry about the odd silence.

            As Nick moved to sit down so he was out of Natalie's way, his mind was once more drawn to the thought of marriage.  Guilt and fear had held his tongue on the matter.  He knew, he had known for a while, that he didn't ever want to live without Natalie.  Even though, when taking her blood, he knew that she felt the same, he didn't really believe it.  But now, as Nick watched her eat her toast, he wondered if maybe he should look around for an engagement ring.  It would be nice to have one, if he ever got up the guts to ask her.

            As Natalie put her plate and mug in the sink, she smiled at Nick.  He was off in another world again.  She kissed him softly on his cold lips.  "I have to go.  Will I see you some time during your shift?"

            He snapped out of it quickly, returning the kiss.  "Most likely.  Love you."

            Natalie smiled.  "Love you too."

            She hummed as she drove to the Coroner's Building.  She hated being sick with a passion.  Ever since that incident with the black market organs… Now that she was feeling better, she was happy.  The shadows were growing long as she pulled into the parking lot.  She was probably one of the few people who truly enjoyed going to work 99% of the time, and loved the night shift.

            She stepped out of her car, happy to be getting her hands back in a dead body after a week of sick leave.  A sharp pains struck the back of her head, and she could feel warm liquid trickling down the back of her neck.  As the world went black, the last thought she had was that if she got blood in her car, it was going to be hell to get out.

(A/N:  Da Da Dum.  Uh-oh pasghettios.  What's going to happen to our favorite coroner?  Tune in next week, same time, same place, for the next chapter.  Yeah.  Right.  More like in a couple days.  It's Christmas vacation, so I have _lots of time to write.  Well, the whole damn story has already run through my head six or seven times, which means I'm getting sick of it and just want it to end…uh-oh.  Hopefully this isn't going to have the same fate as 'Drow'.  But I wouldn't ever be that cruel (or nice, depending on your POV) again.  All right, I'm done babbling.  Thanks for reading, please review, and I pray you enjoyed.)_


	3. Missing

**Chapter Three**

(A/N:  I just realized something.  Tomorrow is Christmas Eve.  What's up with that?  Vacation _just started.  So, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.  Anyway, this little tale is really rolling along.  I hope you enjoyed the last chapter, and thanks for all the comments.  R/R/E)_

Disclaimer:  Same as last time.  I think.

            Tracy glanced over at Nick again.  He was _still off in his own little world.  At first, she had been nervous every time he had spaced out behind the wheel.  But once she realized he reacted the same, whether his mind was on the road or elsewhere, she calmed down.  Now that not even a car crash could kill her, she grinned every time he got lost in his memories and wondered what he was thinking about._

            But he had been inordinately silent for a long time.  She reached over and prodded him with her finger.

            "What are you thinking about this time, Nick?"

            "Hm?  Oh.  Nothing, Trace."  That single thought back at the loft had sparked a fire in his head, one that he couldn't put out.  He glanced over at Tracy, who was looking at him expectantly.  "What?"

            "I bet it had something to do with a certain coroner we both know," Tracy said with a wicked gleam in her eyes.  Even though everyone knew that Nick and Natalie were living together, she still enjoyed ragging on him.  And, most of the time, he would play along.

            "If I ask you something, will you keep your mouth shut?" he asked.  That came out more harshly than he had intended.    

            Tracy took it in stride, realizing he was serious.  "Of course."

            "Do you think…" Nick paused, doubting the wisdom of asking her.  He continued anyway, needing female input.  "Do you think if I asked Nat to marry me, she'd say yes?" he asked in a rush.

            Tracy burst out laughing uproariously, tears of mirth streaming down her face.  "I'm sorry Nick," she said when she regained control of herself.  "But…honestly!  Do you really think there's a possibility of her saying no?"

            "Knowing what I am…"

            "When has that ever mattered to her?  She'd say yes, Nick.  She'd say yes and she'd be _ecstatic."_

            A brief smile lit his face.  "Thanks, Tracy."

            She laughed again.  "Me and Vachon better get invited to the wedding."

            "Don't worry."  Nick smiled boyishly.  "You will be."

            That's when the call came in.

~~~~{@

            Natalie woke seconds later, to someone prodding her with something and a voice accompanying the sharp jabs,

            "Get up.  Let's go.  And don't even _think about running."_

            She got groggily to her feet, facing a man. "Who…?"

            He slapped her viciously across the face.  "Shut up and get in the car."

            He made her drive.  She could see that he knew what he was doing - the bat he had used to render her unconscious for the few moments was covered in cellophane.  He could take it off and dispose of it, leaving no evidence on the bat.  Gloves covered his hands, eliminating fingerprints, and his clothes were a generic brand, totally untraceable.  She would bet they were new, directly from a store, so _nothing could be used to trace him.  His short black hair had so much gel in it that a nuclear explosion couldn't lift a hair of it from his head - which meant no hairs left in her car to trace._

            No one would be able to find anything to trace him.  She was going to have to get out of this by herself.

            He suddenly grabbed the wheel.  "Be ready to jump out, but don't try to run," he told her.  "Now!" he said as he jerked the wheel so the car was headed straight towards a tree.

            She threw open her door, and tumbled out.  Not letting the fall to the ground stun her, she immediately got to her feet and started hauling ass away from her abductor.  They were in a deserted area, which made her run even faster, hoping to come in sight of a building.  Unfortunately, she didn't get far before something smashed against the back of her knee, and she crumpled to the grass.

            Her captor hunkered down by her, and she could see her car in flames in the background.  "You really shouldn't have done that," he said pleasantly as his hand found her kneecap.  Skillful fingers easily found the pressure points, and he began to squeeze.  Pain shot up Natalie's leg, and she began to whimper despite herself.  It hurt so bad that she was immobilized, and tears streamed down her face.  If he kept squeezing, he was going to pop off her kneecap.  Blesséd darkness consumed her.

~~~~{@

            Nick and Tracy arrived at the scene of the crash in a relatively short time.  A call had come out over the radio reporting a flaming car, crashed into a tree, with no known survivors.  Tracy had been making cracks about drunk drivers all the way there.  Nick abruptly fell silent as he caught sight of the flaming hulk - and the license plate that was still legible.

            "Tracy," he moaned, pointing to it as he got out of the Caddy, "please tell me that doesn't say what I think it says."  If it did… anybody that was in there would be charred beyond help.

            Tracy paled - as much as a vampire could pale - as she read the numbers.  "Oh my God.  Oh my God, oh my God."

            "Nat…" Nick whispered, sinking to his knees, raw pain in his voice.

            The two detectives watched in silent horror from the sidelines as firemen put out the blaze.  They were left cold by grief, too cold to even cry.  Nick used his vampiric sense, searching for blood through his daze.  Burned blood, even when it had been boiled away, left a very distinct flavor in the air.  He could not detect it.  Of course, the stench of the raging inferno could very well mask it.  They watched, still in a state of shock, as the blaze was extinguished.  When the hunk of metal cooled down enough, firefighters began sifting through the wreckage for bone fragments and such.

            Pretty soon, they came to a conclusion.  "There was no one in here!" one of them shouted.

            "Thank God," Nick said.  His mind hadn't been able to comprehend that his Natalie was gone forever, and did not rejoice, because it didn't have to.  He was quickly building up a wall around the entire experience, as quick as it had been, to protect himself from the thought of her death.

            "Then where is she?" Tracy asked, choking back tears.  She and Natalie may not have been close friends, but Tracy did truly like and admire the coroner.  "Why would she torch her own car?"

            Nick's mind jumped to the first conclusion he could reach, the obvious one.  "The serial victims all looked so similar…"

            "And similar to Natalie.  Oh, Jesus, Nick.: her now-perfect memory tracked back to each case file.  Every single victim had been tortured over a number of days, then raped, and finally murdered.  Natalie's temp, while she was out with the flu, had come to the conclusion that they had been murdered _while being raped, because it was a single-time thing in ever case.  Had they been repeatedly raped, it would have been a different story.  But the temp had surmised that the perp got off on other people's pain._

            "Let's go," Nick said.  He pushed his way through the other officers at the scene as quickly as he could without drawing undue attention to his speed.  Tracy followed closely behind.'

            "Where are we going?" she asked, once in the Caddy.

            "Belasarius," Nick said dangerously.  "Use your cell and call the precinct to ID the vehicle in case they haven't yet, so they're not wasting their time.  But don't tell them where we're going.  I need to be bale to get _answers_ out of whoever's there."

Tracy did as he told her, seeing the flecks of red in his eyes.  When they reached the cozy little white house, Nick got out and slammed the Caddy's door.  Tracy winced at his rough treatment of his belovéd car.  He pounded on the front door, heedless of the late hour.

            The door was almost immediately opened by Abel.  When he realized who was standing there, he looked surprised, like he had been expecting someone else.

            "Where is he?" Nick growled, his voice made deeper by the slight unleashing of the vampire within.  He shoved past Abel, listening for heartbeats.

            "Who?" the Bible-monikered man asked.

            "Your brother."  Nick already determined that no one else was in the house.  He shoved Abel up against the wall.  "_Where is he_?"

            Tracy stood behind her partner, watching the scene unfold before her.  The small man cowered in the face of Nick's wrath.

            "I don't know," he whimpered."

            "Bull shit," Nick said quietly, dangerously.  "If you don't tell me, I'm going to kill you.  I don't give a flying fuck about the consequences.  I'll kill you with my bare hands."

            Abel heard the deadly intent in Nick's voice, and his features took on a look of panic.  "I don't know!  He doesn't tell me where he goes when he disappears like this!" Nick had him literally sobbing and cowering against the wall.  "I don't know!  I don't know!"

            "Back off, Nick," Tracy said, quiet enough so that only he could hear her.  "He's no use to us if you've got him so scared he can't think."  She could visibly see Nick have to fight to take a couple steps away from Abel.

            The man had his arms crossed protectively over his chest.  He had huddled in on himself, to take up the least amount of space, and was shaking like a leaf.  Tracy would put money on a bet that they were standing in front of a severely abused man, most likely by his older brother.

            Her gently, cool fingers forced his head up so his eyes met hers.  "Your brother's the serial we're looking for, right?"

            Miserable eyes stared back at her, occasionally flickering to Nick.  "I don't know for sure…"

            "But you would guess he is," she said, praying Nick would hold his tongue until they could get answers.

            A quick nod was his answer.  "But I can't tell you anything.  He'll…" Abel's gaze quickly flickered to a spot behind Tracy.

            She followed his gaze and saw the SM stuff.  She met Nick's eyes and knew that he had seen the same and understood.  She could see the anger at the man in front of him slowly leaching out of his body.  But not the panic over Natalie.

            "Did Kane ever tell you _anything_ about where he was keeping the women?" Tracy asked, applying a bit of hypnotic pressure.  He was too distressed to put completely under.  It would probably end up breaking his mind, or something like that.

            "No," Abel sobbed.  "He never tells me anything."

            "Think hard," Tracy said with more pressure.  "Has he ever said anything?  About another property, or a building…"

            His distress was making hypnotism difficult.  "I don't know… I think he talked about a warehouse once when he was drunk…"

            "Please…" Nick said suddenly.  He let the pain, fear, and worry show through in his voice.  "Your brother has my girlfriend.  Please help me get her back."

            Abel took a shuddering breath, his eyes focusing on Nick.  He used his shoulder to wipe off his face.  "He'll kill me.  Or worse."

            "Then we'll put you in protective custody until he's apprehended."

            He seemed to steel himself, pushing slightly away from the wall so he was standing straight and squaring his shoulders.  "Do you have a search warrant?"  Nick and Tracy glanced at each other, and shook their heads, praying he wasn't going to decide he wanted a lawyer, or something.  "Would it help if I went through his stuff with you there?"

            "Yes, it would," Tracy said.  They followed him down the hall to a closed door.  Abel had bucked up for a few minutes, steeling himself, but now he began to shake again.

            "I don't think I can go in there."

            "Please help us," Tracy said.  Pleading had worked to get them this far.  "If we don't find him soon…"

            Abel visibly steeled himself again, as he pushed open the door.  Tracy's eyes widened perceptibly at what was within.  Even Nick, in all his jadedness, was a bit shocked.  Whips and chains hung from the ceiling.  The walls were festooned with handcuffs, manacles, knives, and other torture devices.  Then there was a hundred times as much SM stuff on the floor.  Abel brushed against one of the dangling straps of leather and flinched away like it had stung him.

            "He's going to kill me for showing you this," Abel muttered.  "No matter where you put me."

            They searched for as long as they could, really pushing the limit.  After the first half hour, Nick and Tracy helped, regardless of the consequence.  Both of their beepers went off multiple times, but they ignored them.  There was nothing that they needed.

            Nick swore viciously when he realized they _had_ to leave if Tracy was going to get back to her apartment in time.

            "What about me?" Abel asked as they prepared to leave, watching with terrified eyes.  "You have no _idea_ what he's like.  See this?"  He jerked up his shirt to revealing scabbing over slashes in his stomach.  "That's just because I didn't put enough sugar in his coffee last time you were here."

            Tracy and Nick glanced at each other.  "It's too late to get a patrol car," Nick said.

            "You've got the best security," Tracy returned.

            Nick turned to Abel.  "The best we can do now is you staying with me.  If you're coming, get a change of clothes."

            "Hull'on a sec."  Abel was gone and back in a flash, carrying a small backpack.

            "You're in the back," Nick said shortly as they walked out of the house.  He cursed his vampirism again and again.  He could not continue his search during the day, because of _his curse_.  If Natalie died…

            Before Tracy got out of the car, she turned to him.  "If you're going to call me, call my cell phone.  I'm…not going to be home.  Don't worry, Nick.  We'll get her back."

            Nick nodded.  Abel was silent as Nick drove back to the loft.  Nick did not speak either, desperately trying to come up with a way to find Natalie.  He couldn't think of _anything_.  Abel followed him out of the car when they reached the loft.

            "Nobody can get in.  There's enough security traps to catch a professional.  You better hope to God your brother doesn't kill Natalie."

            "I'm sorry," Abel said quietly.

            Upstairs, Nick grabbed sheets from the closet and tossed them on the couch.  "There's the couch, there's the bathroom, there might be food in the freezer, and don't touch the green bottles."

            "Okay," was the timid answer.

            Nick played the messages on his answering machine.  The first was from the Captain, asking where the hell he and his partner were.  Then it was Reese again, asking if Nick knew where Natalie was because she hadn't been in the car.  Then Reese _again_, saying that Nick had better answer his beeper, or else.  The last message started with a silence.  Nick could hear a _very_ familiar heartbeat - Natalie's heartbeat - and one he recognized as Kane's.

            "I've got your girlfriend, Knight.  I wouldn't suggest that you look for her, unless you want her to die before her time."

            Nick could hear Kane moving around, then it fell silent for a short moment.  Then Natalie whimpered, which quickly turned to a tortured shriek, and the call ended.

            The vampire raged for release within Nick.  His eyes glowed red as he clenched his fists to try and regain some semblance of control.  In the background, he could hear Abel's frightened heartbeat.  He stalked to the fridge, almost throwing the door off its hinges.  He chugged down two and a half bottles before the vampire was appeased.  Leaning his head against the cool metal, he fought to hold back the bloodtears that threatened to overwhelm him.

(A/N:  There was something I wanted to say, but then I forgot it.  That sux.  'Pi' is on, Tuesday at 4.  Someone remind me.  *grin*  J/K.  If I don't remember to watch it, I swear, I'm going to kill myself.  Oo, maybe _that_'s what I'll buy Katie for her belated (and very much so) b-day gift…)


	4. Rescued

**Chapter Four**

(A/N:  Christmas Day!!!  I got a cotton candy maker!  Of course, I didn't get what I _really_ wanted - the flute music book for the Manheim Steamrollers.  Oh well, I also got lotsa clothes…a $100 gift certificate to B&N…a CD player…candy…$100 cash…movies…I love Christmas!!!  Merry Christmas, everybody!  Hey, I watched the 'Farscape' marathon yesterday.  I'm the only person I know who's ever heard of that show.  I'm probably also the only person who really likes Scorpius, and thinks he's not that bad for a bad guy.  He kind of reminds me of Lacroix, in some ways.  One of them being that he never dies, not matter how many times they kill him.  *grin*)

Disclaimer:  Same as last time.  Obviously, whammied nurses…random doctors… receptionists…those people are all mine.

            Natalie curled in a fetal position on the floor of the room.  The manacles on her wrist were connected by long, heavy chains to the wall.  She knew that she was somewhere in the warehouse district, probably relatively near the loft.  But it could have been a million miles away for all the help it could do her.

            She heard the door open and tried to make herself smaller.  Less than 24 hours in his clutches and her clothes were already in tatters and cuts, welts, and bruises covered her body.  She knew that he would be jerking off to her screams, again.  As she felt the first burning pain on her legs, she whimpered, trying to hold in the screams.  But soon, she could not help herself and began to shriek at the top of her lungs.

~~~{@

            Nick impatiently paced the loft.  The sun was almost gone, almost set.  Abel was asleep on the couch.  Nick wasn't sure if Tracy would be up yet, but he called her cell phone anyway.

            "Hello?"

            "Vachon?"  Why was Vachon answering Tracy's phone?  Nick knew she was over there, with him in the abandoned church, but usually it just rang if she was asleep, even when Vachon was with her.

            "Hi Knight.  Tracy told me to answer of it rang, in case it was you."

            "She's not awake yet?"

            "No.  She's still a fledgling.  The sun still has power over her.  Did you find Dr. Lambert, yet?"

            "No," Nick growled.  "Tell Tracy to get over here as soon as she wakes up."

            "Knight!  Don't hang up yet!  Don't you have a link with the Doc?"

            "What do you mean?  She's not one of us."

            Lacroix's inadequate teaching was showing through again.  "Haven't you taken her blood?  You form a link, regardless of whether she's a vampire or mortal.  And, Knight.  Can I come with Tracy?"

            "Yes.  And, thank you, Vachon.  If I find her, I'm in your debt."

            Nick hung up the phone, and immediately began focusing on his memories of Natalie.  If he had known that he had a link earlier, when she was still with him, it would be easier to feel her.  But since this was the first time…

            He concentrated on the way she felt, sounded, and smelled.  He remembered so hard that he could almost feel her touching him, caressing his face.  Suddenly, he could sense her.  Weakly, but she was there.  He had to fight down a shriek of rage when he felt her pain, and that she was unconscious.  But now, he could find her.

~~~~{@

            Nick drove unerringly down the street, taking turns when he felt he should turn.  Tracy was next to him, and Vachon sat in the back.  He had decided to drive the Caddy, instead of flying direct, so he could bring Natalie straight to the hospital.

            He suddenly swung into an alley and stopped.  "We fly from here, so he doesn't see the Caddy's headlights, or hear it."

            Tracy grinned.  As far as she was concerned, the absolutely _best_ part of begin a vampire was flying.  Nick shot off into the night, the two younger vampires close behind.  He landed on a roof just as suddenly as he had taken off.  Tracy stumbled slightly as she landed.

            "You two look for Kane and any other people," Nick said.  "I'll find Nat."

            They entered carefully from a skylight, immediately splitting up and listening for heartbeats.  Nick followed his sense of where Natalie was.  He went down two floors and walked along a long hallway.  He could hear her heartbeat getting louder.  He finally located the exact source, behind the last door on the left.

            The cloying scent of blood hit him as he opened the door.  She was curled up on the floor in a fetal position, whimpering softly.  He immediately raced to the huddled lump on the floor that was Natalie.  "No more," she pleaded with her eyes tightly shut.  "Please, no more."  Her voice was raspy from all the screaming she must have done.

            Nick knelt down beside her.  "It's me, Nat.  It's Nick.  You're safe, I've got you."

            She opened her eyes and uncurled slightly so she could see him.  Then she burst out sobbing, throwing her arms around him.

            Nick heard the rattle of chains and felt the cold metal slap against him.  "Let me get those off you, okay, Nat?"  She whimpered as he gently forced her arms off his neck.  "It's okay.  I'm not going anywhere.  I'm just going to get these off."  He took one wrist and literally forced the manacle open, letting it drop off her wrist.  Then he did that same for the other one.

            Natalie locked her arms around his neck again, sobbing uncontrollably.  He pressed her head to his shoulder, murmuring into her ear.  His hands ran over her body, searching for broken bones.  He was glad he had fed well before leaving the loft.  The scent of her blood was strong in the air.

            "Is there anyone else here, Nat?"

            "Don't leave me," she whimpered.  "Don't leave me don't leave me don't leave me."

            "Sh.  Sh.  I won't.  I'm not going to.  Tracy and Vachon are here.  I need to know if there's anywhere specific I should send them.

            "I don't know," she sobbed.  "I don't know.  Don't leave me."  Her arms tightened around him.

            "I'm not going to, Nat.  I promise you.  Can you walk?"

            "I…I don't know.  I don't think so."  She was shaking in his arms.

            Nick scooped her up in his arms, cradling her against his body.  She kept her arms locked around his neck and her face buried in his shoulder.

            "Let's get out of here," he said as he walked out the door.  He raised his voice so Tracy and Vachon could hopefully hear him, wherever they were in the warehouse.  "Trace!  Vachon!  What are you guys doing?"

            He heard Tracy reply faintly.  "Señor Dickwad has been apprehended.  No one else is in here.  You got Natalie?"

            "Yep.  Can you two knock him out and fly him back to the precinct?"

            "Sure Nick!  Call me later."

            Nick carried Natalie up the stairs to the top floor.  "We're going up through the skylight now.  Okay?"

            When he felt her nod against his shoulder, he rose up slowly and out through the window.  Then he continued on by air to the Caddy, gently landing on the passenger side.

            "Do you want to lie down in the back?"

            "No."  She tensed in his arms.

            "Okay.  But I'm going to have to put you down to open the door."  After she nodded, he waited a few seconds.  "That means you have to let me go."

            "I don't want to," she whimpered in a tiny voice.

            "You're safe now, Nat.  I promise you that.  Knowing Tracy's zest for flying, Kane's probably already at the precinct, in a cell.  If he, or anyone else, ever ties to hurt you again, I'll kill them before they get a chance to lay a finger on you."  He felt her hands slowly loosening from around his neck, and he gently set her on her feet, making sure she could keep her balance.  Then he opened the door and eased her into the seat.

            As he walked around the Caddy to the driver's side, her frightened eyes tracked him.  He quickly slid behind the wheel, shutting the door and turning to face her.  He gently cupped her face in his hands, brushing away the steady stream of tears with his thumbs, mindful of the livid bruise on one cheek.

            "I was so afraid…" he started, but wasn't able to continue.  His all too vivid imagination was feeding him pictures of what could have happened to her.  Instead, he began kissing her forehead, her cheeks, her eyelids, the tip of her nose, everywhere on her face.  He moved away every so often to study her face and caress it with his hands.

            "I'm sorry I didn't find you sooner," he said at long last.

            Natalie finally spoke.  "You found me soon enough."

            Nick eventually sat back in his seat and began to drive away.  Natalie kept a tight hold on one of his hands, though, needing the physical contact.  As he drove past the loft, her hand tightened on his.

            "Where are we going, Nick?" she asked fearfully.

            He glanced over at her.  "The hospital."

            Her hand tightened to the point where it hurt him.  "Why?" she whimpered.  "I don't want to.  Why can't we go back to the loft?"

            Nick glanced over to see tears flowing down her face again.  He squeezed her hand reassuringly.  "It will be okay, Nat.  I'll be with you the entire time, okay?"

            She made a small, inarticulate noise, like a frightened animal.  Nick knew that the reasons behind her fear were many-fold.  First of all, after such a harrowing ordeal - only a little more than a full day, yes, but seeing the damage inflicted in the short time…- she probably just wanted to stay close to someone she knew and felt safe with.  Then, of course, there was her deep fear of hospitals.  He knew she would almost rather die than go to a medical facility.

            "If I didn't make you go, Tracy would have my head.  So would Reese…and Grace…and many other people.  I'll be right there for you, Nat."

            He continued to talk to her until he parked in the hospital parking lot, near the entry to the Emergency Room.  It did nothing to lessen her fear or make her stop silently crying.  Once parked, he turned off the engine and unbuckled his seatbelt, turning so he could talk to her face to face.

            "Nat, please listen to me."  He caressed her face with the hand she wasn't holding on to, running it through her hair.  "I'm going to be right there beside you.  I promise, they won't do _anything_ they're not supposed to do.  No matter where I am, I'll be able to hear them and you."

            "I'm scared," she said quietly.

            "I know you are, love.  And, for whatever comfort it's worth, I'll be in there with you, right beside you.  No matter what they're doing, or how much they try to get me to leave."

            "Promise you won't leave me?"

            "I promise.  Cross my heart and hope to die."

            Natalie smiled tremulously at the childish gestures he made to go along with the statement.  She had convinced everyone she had gotten over the whole heart thing.  Key word being _convinced_.  She now avoided doctors, hospitals, and medical places in general.  She could count on one hand the number of times she had been in a hospital since that incident, and the number of times she had seen a doctor.  When she had to stay after Nick almost drained her… If he hadn't been there when she woke up, she would have flipped out.

            "Okay.  Quick.  Before I start freaking out again."

            Nick smiled and quickly got out, going over to her side.  She had opened her door and swung her feet out.  He watched her try to stand up, but she sat back down and looked up at him with her lower lip trembling.

            "I can't.  My knees…"

            "It's okay, Nat.  Does it hurt when I pick you up?"  She shook her head, so he scooped her up in his arms again.  He could feel her trying to control her breathing, to calm herself down.

            Inside, the receptionist gave them forms to fill out and told them to sit and wait.  Nick knew emergency rooms - it might be a while because Natalie's injuries didn't look life threatening.  He set her down in a chair, and sat down next to her, moving his chair right up against hers.  He circled her shoulders with his arm, gently hugging her as she laid her head on his shoulder.

            "Do you want me to whammy them into taking you now?" he asked quietly.

            "No.  Other people need more help than me.  I'll be fine until they're ready."

            Nick chuckled softly.  "I love you, Nat."

            "Love you, too."  She found his other hand, and held it in one of hers.  He quickly turned it so he was the one holding, and squeezed it gently.

            They sat for a while.  Nick would hear her fear begin to rise every so often, and he would begin to quietly talk to her, or stroke her hair.  She had dropped her professional mask in place, which Nick had come to recognize as her protection from the world.  Finally, after what Nick thought to be an incredibly long time, there was a doctor free to see Natalie.  When the nurses saw she couldn't walk, they got her a wheelchair.

            "You'll have to stay here, sir," one of them said as he started to follow.

            "No!" Natalie cried, reaching back and grabbing Nick's hand.  He could see the raw panic in her eyes.

            He focused on the mesmerizing sound of their heartbeats.  He wasn't going to argue with them on this, he just hoped Natalie understood.  "You _will_ let me go with her."

            "…you go with…"

            Nick gave them a minute to snap out of it, meeting Natalie's eyes to see the clear relief in them.  "Can I go with her?"

            "You can come with her," one replied in a monotone voice.

            Natalie still kept a hold on his hand as they walked away.

~~~~{@

            Nick's cell phone rang as he was driving Natalie back to the loft.  The doctor had wanted her to stay overnight, but she had quickly vetoed that with back up from Nick.  So, Nick got many instructions on what she could and couldn't do.  They had sent them home with a wheelchair, too.  She wasn't supposed to put weight on her knees for at least a week, until the bruising had a chance to clear up.  Nothing was broken, just extremely bruised.

            He looked at her apologetically.  "I have to take this.  It's either Reese or Tracy.  If I don't…"

            She nodded as he took it off his belt.

            "Hello?"

            "Knight!"  Nick forced down a groan.  It was Reese, and the captain sounded completely ripshit.  "What the hell did you think you were doing?"

            "You'll have to clarify that a bit, Cap.  I've done _many_ things in the past 24 hours that might require that question to be asked."

            "Let's start at the beginning with booking off.  Ever hear of it?"

            "I've had more important things to worry about than that."

            "No excuse!  And not answering any phones or beepers?"

            "See previous answer."

            "Once more, no excuse!  And then you decide to take down that bastard single-handedly?"

            "Tracy helped."

            "You know what I mean!  Did you ever consider backup?  Waiting for a warrant?  _Anything_ like that?"

            "What did you want me to do?  Wait for all the paperwork it would have taken to get a warrant?  Bring the brother _in_ for questioning?  Wait for _backup_ once I found the place?  Jesus Christ, Captain.  By the time all that crap got done, Nat could have been _dead_.  She's in bad enough shape as it is.  What would _you_ have done, where _you_ in my place?"

            There was dead silence on the other end for a _long_ while.  Natalie rubbed her thumb across the top of Nick's hand, wishing they were already back in the loft so she could lie down with Nick beside her.  She could hear both sides of the conversation, up until that point, Reese was so loud.

            "You're right Nick.  I can't blame you.  But, for the next week, you're on leave.  _With_ pay."

            Nick smiled.  "Okay, Captain.  Anything else?"  He was almost to the loft.

            "How is Dr. Lambert?  I'm assuming you're at the hospital?"

            "Driving back from there."

            "Tell her everyone was real worried about her, okay?"

            "Will do," Nick said as he pulled into the garage.  "Can I call you back later?"

            "You don't have to.  Take care of her, Knight."

            "Okay.  Bye Captain."

            Nick turned to Natalie as he got out of the Caddy.  "Reese says everyone wishes you well."  He got out the wheelchair and set it up outside her open door.  Then he gently transferred her into it.  "Um… One thing I forgot to mention earlier.  Kane's brother, Abel, is staying with us.  At least for the night."

            "What?" Natalie asked, shocked.

            "The deal was he'd tell us everything he knew, as long as we provided protection for him.  He's as much a victim as you.  I didn't want to take the time to drive him back to the precinct, explain the whole thing, and then take backup when I went for you."

            "But he'll be gone as soon as you can get him out, right?"

            "Of course."  Nick pushed her to the lift and they rode up.

            The door opened to reveal Abel watching TV.  He jumped when the door ground open, and Nick could hear his heart racing in fear.  He cowered on the couch as Nick pushed Natalie in.

            Riding up in the lift, Natalie had been kind of scared and relatively angry with Nick.  But as soon as she saw the cowering boy - for a boy he was, looking only a little over twenty - her heart went out to him.  He was definitely more of a victim than her.

            "Are you hungry, Nat?" Nick asked her as she studied Abel.  In her mind, he looked just similar enough to his brother to leave her feeling uneasy, but an overall sweetness to his features pretty much eased her fears.

            "Starved," she replied truthfully.  "And thirsty."

            "What do you want?" Nick asked, solicitously transferring her to 'her' chair at the table.

            "A giant glass of water for starters.  Then just surprise me.  Nothing big."  She twisted around in her chair so she could make eye contact with Abel.  He stared back with fearful eyes.  Natalie decided to wait and see if he would speak.

            Nick kept an eye on both of them as he set a glass of water on the table in front of Natalie and put a TV dinner in the microwave.  He wasn't sure how she would react to having the brother of the man who had been viciously torturing her just hours before, in the loft.  It probably wasn't the wisest idea.  He had been so relieved to find her alive, he had completely forgotten about his 'house guest'.  He had _meant_ to have Tracy pick Abel up too, and deliver _him_ to the precinct along with his brother.  He supposed he could call her and have her pick him up, but something was telling him to let the skittish man stay the night.

            Natalie was done staring, done sizing Abel up, done playing the game she had initiated.  She felt only pity for the man, even though she knew she should be feeling anger or something.  She smiled suddenly.

            "Hi.  I'm Natalie."

            He jumped and flinched.  "A-Abel," he stuttered.

            "You hungry?"

            He shook his head quickly and nervously.

            "Okay."  Natalie turned back around in her chair and picked up the water, taking a _long_ drink.  She met Nick's worried eyes and smiled to reassure him.

            When the microwave beeped, Nick took out the steaming meal and place it in front of her, with a fork on the side.  After thanking Nick, she attacked the food ravenously.  She had gotten water, yes, but no food in the last twenty-odd hours.  Nick watched with sad, worried eyes.

            "I'm really tired, Nick," she said when she was done.

            "I'll take you up to bed, then," he sad, scooping her up and carrying her up the stairs.

            "You better bring that wheelchair up," she said as he set her on the bed.  "I'm not waking you up every time I have to go to the bathroom."

            Nick smiled and kissed her cheek.  "Okay.  I'll be right back."

            Natalie tried not to be concerned as he left the room.  He was just downstairs, and she could hear him coming back up already.  Nothing could happen to her at the loft.  That was one of the cardinal rules of life - nothing bad ever happens to you at home.

            Nick smiled as he came back in, and opened the wheelchair while Natalie got into her pajamas.  She climbed under the covers, a bit stiffly.

            "Nick?  I know you're probably not tired, but…"

            Using vampiric speed, Nick was in his pajamas and under the covers with her in moments.  "Don't think for an _instant_ I would let you go to sleep alone."  He curled protectively around her and nuzzled her neck.  "I love you, Nat.  The thought of losing you…"

            She rolled over in his arms so she was facing him and smiled, putting up a brave front.  But inside, she was suddenly afraid to sleep.  "I love you too, Nick.  Always have, always will."

            Nick could see the fear in the backs of her eyes, which she so valiantly tried to hide.  He kissed the tip of her nose.  "Go to sleep, Nat.  I've got you, you're safe with me."

            He kissed her eyelids, but they opened up almost immediately once his lips left.  "Nick, let Abel stay if he needs to, okay?  He can't be more than twenty-five, and he's still just a scared little boy inside.  You can see it in his eyes.  He's terrified of his brother."

            "If you're okay with that," Nick said, as concerned for her as ever.

            Now that she was under the warm blankets, and in Nick's arms, it was getting hard to stay awake.  He began to sing a soft song in French, and she was lost.


	5. A New Guest

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 5/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13?

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Ay yi yi.  Same as last time, I think.  Yeah, the funky new people haven't shown up yet.  Random cops might be mine, might not.  Reese isn't.  He belongs to…you know.****

****

**Chapter Five**

(A/N:  THEY'RE CANCELING FARSCAPE!!!!!!!  THEY CAN'T DO THAT!!!!  Okay, people, here's your job.  Even if you hate the show, have never watched it, never heard of it, don't get it in your area, or anything, go to www.scifi.com, figure out where their little Farscape space is, figure out where to email them, and BEG them not to cancel it.  I'm begging you all to do that!  And then go watch a couple episodes, and you'll see why it shouldn't be cancelled.  Hey, did anyone see 'The Others'?  Wasn't that pathetically un-scary and predictable??  I think I had the entire thing figured out within ten minutes of the beginning.  But, damn, that was a good movie.  Anywho, I'm babbling again.  R/R/E!)

            Natalie woke, stifling a scream.  She had always been susceptible to nightmares, not something she was proud to admit.  It was only in her dreams that she allowed herself to worry about things, or let things that happened to her in her waking hours affect her.  Well, there was no way in fucking *_hell*_ she was going back to sleep now.  Now would she wake Nick up, this early in the day.

            It was one of those rare occasions when she wasn't in his arms, when his back was turned to her on the bed.  Natalie quietly sat up and swung her feet over the edge of the bed.  It was time to see how her knees *_really* were.  They were always her weak spots, so she very gingerly put weight on them and stood up._

            That she could do.  She might even be able to walk.  But, not wanting to push her luck, she lowered herself into the wheelchair.  Now that she was out of the bed, she paused to reconsider.  Did she really want to leave the safety of Nick?  For she already knew that she was planning on going downstairs.  She had already begun to build up the wall that protected her from all bad experiences in her life.

            Careful angling got her through the door.  The damn chair was harder to get through small spaces than it looked.  The stairs posed a problem.  Chairs don't go down stairs, at least not with her in them.  She could see Abel, lying flat on his stomach on the couch, peering at her over the arm.

            She pushed herself up, and then used the chair and the railing to ease herself onto her butt on the top stair.  Okay, that hurt.  Maybe she wasn't as all right as she thought.

            "Do you ever sleep?" she asked as she began to bump down the stairs.  Screw the chair.  She'd figure that out at the bottom.

            "I'm a light sleeper," he said quietly.  "Do…do you need some help?"

            "Could you grab that damn hunk of metal?" she asked sweetly.

            He eased past her on the stairs, like he was afraid she would bite, then waited until she was at the very bottom before folding it up and carrying it down for her.

            "Thank you," she said as he reopened it at the bottom.

            He backed away from her as she pushed herself up.  "You're welcome."

            "Sorry for waking you up," Natalie said as she wheeled herself into the kitchen for Advil and water.  Her entire body was just one big ache.

            "That's okay," Abel said quietly, standing uncomfortably with his hands in his pockets.  His eyes shone with fear.

            Natalie tossed back the Advil and downed the glass of water.  "I don't bite, you know," she said as she smiled slightly.

            His lips uplifted in a tremulous smile.  Natalie wheeled herself to a spot a couple feet in front of him and cocked her head.  "How old are you?"

            "Twenty-one."

            Her eyes widened slightly.  He was *_young*.  And he made her feel old._

            "I'm sorry," he said suddenly.

            "For what?"

            He began to wring his hands, twisting over and over.  "I knew - I mean, I thought… well, I had a suspicion, of what… my brother was doing…"

            Natalie stifled a well of anger.  Showing anger to Abel, even though she didn't even know him, was as hard as being mad with Nick.  They both had almost identical looks of a beaten puppy.  The only difference was, Natalie would guess Abel really had been beaten.

            "I'm sorry.  I'm sorry."

            "Stop apologizing," Natalie said, and he shut up instantly.  "Why didn't you tell anyone?"

            "What if I was wrong?"  His wringing hands increased their tempo.  "He would've… You think what he did to you was bad?"  He shuddered.  "And even if I wasn't, he would have somehow figured out how to pin it on me.  Everything else he's ever done… Have Detective Knight pull up my record.  He did it all, and somehow managed to get me blamed and thrown in jail.  Then he would bail me out, and… I'm sorry."

            His eyes were wet, and he cringed when she spoke.  "And what if you had?"  Her common sense prevailed against her emotions.  "He was good.  *_Very* good.  The police had no evidence.  They wouldn't have been able to hold him for long."_

            "R-really?"

            Natalie smiled warmly.  "Really really.  Are you going to stand there forever?  I'm getting a crick in my neck."

            He immediately sat down on the couch.  "Sorry."

            "You needn't apologize for everything.  Neither Nick nor I, will lay a finger on you."

            Abel's lips quirked in a half-smile.  Natalie saw his eyes flick up to the stairwell, which he could see from the angle he was sitting at, and grow slightly wider.

            "Nice try Nick," she said, winking at Abel as she spun around to see him on the top step.

            He slowly walked the rest of the way down the stairs. "Good afternoon, Nat."  He stooped to kiss the top of her head.  "How'd you get down here?"

            She grinned.  "Ever seen kids ride down the stairs in the park on their bikes?"

            "I would have heard that."  His mouth smiled, but his eyes were uncertain.

            "Sometimes, you sleep like the dead, love."

            He paused.  "You wouldn't really have done that, would you?  She didn't, did she?"

            Natalie turned her head away from Nick and shook her eyes 'no' at Abel.  As his eyes flicked back and forth between Nick and Natalie, he got a deer-in-the-headlights look on his face.  Natalie finally laughed.

            "No, of course I didn't.  Not that doing that doesn't sound like fun - maybe when I feel less like I've been run over by a cement truck.  Our talking didn't wake you, did it?"

            "No."  He crouched down and nuzzled her cheek.  "The lack of a certain body next to me did."  He had woken up in a panic, before hearing her heartbeat, and then had listened to their conversation from the beginning.  But he waited until he thought it was a good time to convince her to come back to bed, before he interrupted.

            "Is that a hint?"

            "Maybe."

            Natalie laughed and kissed his cheek.  "Then whisk me away to my chambers, O knight of mine."

            "Anything milady commands."  Nick picked her up, nuzzling her cheek.

            "Good night, Abel."  Natalie's eyes sparkled from her perch in Nick's arms.

            " 'Night."

            "Think you can get the damn chair in one go, too?"  She lightly clasped her arms around Nick's neck, beginning to yawn.

            "Maybe."  Of course, he managed to tuck it under his arm, folded up.  "Good afternoon, Abel."

            "G'afternoon," Abel squeaked.

            Nick carried Natalie up the stairs, wishing Abel were gone so he could just fly up.  He set Natalie on the bed and unfolded the chair as she lay back.  He got in on his side of the bed and curled around her again, stroking the ringlets of her hair.

            "I don't want to go back to sleep," she whispered.

            "Look on the bright side, Nat.  At least they're *_only* nightmares."_

            "Since when have you become an optimist?" she groaned.

            "Since I met you.  Go to sleep, Nat, so you can heal."

            He continued to stroke her hair, humming a soft melody.  One thing he had learned was that Natalie was a susceptible to lullabies as a baby.  Within minutes, she was sound asleep.

~~~~{@

            Natalie swallowed her last spoonful of cereal, then looked at Nick.  "Don't I have to make a statement?  Which I technically should have done yesterday?"

            Nick nodded from where he was leaning against the counter.  "I figured I could drop Abel back at his house, then come back and pick you up and take you to the precinct."

            Abel's head snapped up from concentrating on his bowl of cereal at the mention of his name.  His eyes flicked back and forth from Nick to Natalie as they continued the conversation.

            "Or, you could take me with you from the beginning and save a trip."

            "That I could do.  Would you want to?"

            "Yes.  I'm ready when you are."  She was already showered and dressed, and raring to do something.  They both should have been at work, but Nick was on suspension and she was on sick leave (*_again*)._

            "If… if he gets out on bail…" Abel broke in timidly.

            "Then someone will come get you and you'll be in protective custody again," Natalie assured him.

            He did not look convinced, but fell silent again, finishing his cereal.  Eventually, they rode the lift down to the garage.  Out on the open road, it was relatively silent in the Caddy.  Nick could see that Natalie was lost in her own thoughts, so he didn't talk.  And, of course, Abel just plain didn't speak.

            Soon, Nick pulled up in front go the little white house.  "There you go," he said as Abel got out.  "Thanks for your help."

            "You're welcome."

            Nick didn't wait to see if he even got up the walk before pulling away.  He drove for quite a few minutes in silence.  Finally, he reached over and took one of Natalie's hands in his own.

            "Are you okay?" he asked her quietly, his voice filled with concern.

            She turned her head and smiled at him.  "Of course I am.  I was just thinking.  Nothing important."  That was sort of true.  She had really been trying to figure out how to do this without braking down in tears.  She did not mind Nick seeing the weak side of her (as long as he didn't see it often), but others…

            At the precinct, almost everyone wanted to wish her well.  The wheelchair really threw them all for a loop.  It took them almost fifteen minutes, just to make it to the Captain's office.  The door was open and he was watching it expectantly.

            "Come on in," Reese said as they came in sight, "and shut the door."

            Nick did as he said, and stood behind Natalie and her wheelchair, resting his hands on her shoulders.

            "First of all, let me say I'm glad that you're all right, Natalie."  Reese got up and gave her a hug.  In the line of coroners he had seen, Natalie was his favorite.  She was such a sweet little thing!

            "Thanks, Captain."

            "Natalie, you're here to make your statement?"  She nodded, and he continued.  "Nick, neither you nor Tracy can take it."

            "What?  Why not?" he cried, shocked.  He had assumed it would be either Tracy or himself.  *_They* would know when to stop.  *__They* would only ask the questions that needed to be asked._

            "I don't want this guy to get out on some technicality.  We're doing this *_entire thing* by the book.  You would be considered too close to her to be objective.  Tracy's your partner, thus you could influence her.  *__I* on the other hand, have no connection.  No technicalities."_

            "Let's just get this over with," Natalie said.

            They moved to the conference room.  Nick had to stay behind the one-way glass.  Even though she couldn't see him, Natalie's eyes kept flickering to meet his, no matter where he stood.  Everything they said, he could hear.  Natalie was doing good.  But, her lack of emotion, seeming to have already gotten over it, scared him a little.  It wasn't humanly possible to get over something that bad, that quick.

            Tracy came up behind him when they were about halfway done.  She listened quietly for a while, before beginning to talk quietly to him in a worried voice.

            "It seems like she's already gotten over it and put everything behind her, Nick."

            "I know," he murmured.

            "Can you get over something that horrible that fast?"

            "I don't know."

            "Has she talked to anyone?"

            "No."

            "Is she *_going* to?"_

            "Knowing Nat?  No."

            "Are you going to try and make her?"

            "Yes."

            "Are-"

            "Enough Trace!  Jesus!"

            "Sorry, Nick."

            They stood silently.  Nick concentrated on his link with Natalie.  After… after he had almost killed her, they had, had a link.  But he figured that was because of the amount of blood he had taken.  There was *_so much* Lacroix had never told him.  Her head suddenly snapped up and she met his eyes, even though she didn't realize it.  Or maybe she did.  But he felt her sense of wonderment and gratefulness for his support._

            As soon as Natalie came out of the door to the conference room, she wheeled herself over to Nick.  He bent down and hugged her tightly.

            "Thank you," she whispered.  "How'd you do that?"

            "I'll tell you later," he murmured into her ear.

            "Thank you, Natalie," Reese said as he walked by.  "There's no way he can skate out of this one."

            She smiled until he was gone.  Then she and Nick began to walk out of the precinct.

            "Knight!"  Reese's voice thundered out from his office just as Nick's hand touched the door handle.  "Get back in here!"

            "Do you want to wait in the car?"  Nick murmured into Natalie's ear.

            Her hand tightened on his, and her heart began to race.  "I want to be with you," she whispered.

            So she wasn't completely inhuman.  She was still suffering.  Nick felt bad for feeling glad of that.  He squeezed her hand.  "Okay.  Come on, then."

            Back inside the Captain's office, they were once more directed to close the door and (in Nick's case) sit down.  Reese was looking particularly serious, and pissed.

            "I just got a call from Kane Belasarius' lawyer.  Kane owns the house that he and his brother live in.  And, he can order Abel out at any time.  Which, he just did.  Abel's got one hour to clear out.  It's fallen to me to call and tell him.  From what Tracy said, he's not going to have anywhere to go…"

            Natalie glanced at Nick as he said, "You want to know if we can take him in, since that's where he stayed before."

            "Yes."  Reese picked up his phone, ready to dial.

            "Let me talk to Nat outside."

            Reese nodded.  The two walked out, and Nick led her to a back hallway.  He could still hear Reese dialing the number.

            "Let him come, Nick."

            That surprised Nick, but that wasn't the only problem.  "It's not as simple as that, Nat."

            "With anyone else, no.  But with Abel?  He'll do *_anything* you say and not question it.  He'll be too scared that we'll kick him out, or beat him, or something, to question why you don't eat or anything.  You know that he'll follow any rules set in place to the letter.  If I could sense that, you could.  You can always whammy him, if anything happens…"_

            "You don't mind?"  Those _were convincing arguments on her part._

            Natalie shook her head.  "No, I don't.  Crazy as it seems, I kind of like the kid."

            Nick looked down at her, sitting in her wheelchair and smiling pretty at him.  Against his better judgment, he nodded his head.  "All right."  He could hear Abel, on the phone, beginning to get hysterical.  "Come on.  Abel's getting upset."

            Natalie wheeled her chair back into the office first.  "Let me talk to him, Captain."

            A grateful look spread across the Captain's face as he handed her phone to her.  Nick could hear both sides of the conversation, and understood why Reese had that look on his face.  Abel really was freaking out.

            "Abel, Abel, stop for a minute and take a deep breath," Natalie interrupted him in mid-sentence.

            Nick heard him do that.  Then he said, "What am I supposed to do?  Can he even do that?  I don't have anywhere to go.  How can he do that?"

            "Keep taking deep breaths," Natalie said.  "Yes, he can do that.  Everything is signed in his name.  Unfortunately, on this, the law is on his side.  Now, do you have any relatives you can go to?"

            "No.  Well, not that I know of.  I mean, I've never met any of them."  Natalie and Nick could hear him beginning to cry.  "I don't even have any money.  All the bank accounts are in his name.  All of the bank accounts are in his name.  All of my paychecks get wired straight to there.  What am I going to do?"

            "You can come and stay at the loft with me and Nick for a while, if you want."

            "Really?"

            "Yep.  We'd be happy to have you."

            He sniffled.  "How long could I stay?"

            "As long as you need to."  Natalie had a feeling he wouldn't know what to do if he had to live alone.

            "Thank you.  Thank you so much."

            "No problem.  Hold on a sec."  Natalie covered the mouthpiece and turned to Reese.  "Did they say what he could take out of the house?"

            "Anything in his room, and anything he bought specifically with his own money.  They guy hinted that it wouldn't be much.  But no furniture.  Not even from his room."

            She nodded as she uncovered the mouthpiece.  "Okay.  You can take anything in your room, except the furniture, and anything you bought with your own money.  Do you think you can get that packed in an hour?"

            "Yes."

            "Do you have a car that's registered in your name?"

            "Yes.  I can take that, can't I?  Otherwise I can't get to work."

            "If it's in your name, yes.  Can everything fit into it, and do you know how to get to the loft?"

            "Yes and no."

            "All right."  Natalie gave him directions, then said goodbye and hung up.

            "That is one messed up man," Reese said as soon as the receiver was in the cradle.

            "Yeah," Natalie agreed, "but he's sweet."

            "Well, you two can leave now," Reese said, dismissing them.  "I'm glad you're okay, Natalie."

            Once in the car, Natalie turned to Nick.  "Okay.  How'd you do that?  While I was in the conference room?"  As usual, his timing had been impeccable, giving her the strength she needed to continue.

            "Remember the link we had right after… and it faded?  I thought that it was just because of the…amount I took.  What Lacroix never told me was that if a vampire continuously takes a small amount of blood from a mortal, over a long period of time, they form a bond, too.  That's how I found you - Vachon told me of it.  I… you don't mind, do you?"

            Natalie smiled at his worry, reaching a hand across and running it through his silky hair.  "Of course not.  Why would I?"

            Nick smiled and leaned into her caress as he drove them home.

(A/N:  Oo, I just got home from seeing LotR:tTT.  That was an *_awesome* movie!!!  I can't wait for the last one… The only thing that sucked about this one was that, in the books, Arwen did not go away.  She stayed with Aragorn.  And the scene that she saw in her head, where he was dead and she went into the forest, really happened.  She died, too, of a broken heart.  Oh well.  Maybe Peter Jackson never read the Appendixes, like I did.  But, oo, that made me so mad!!!!  Thanks for ready, I hope you enjoyed, and please review.  Remember, no review is a review in and of itself.)_


	6. A Visit From Lacroix

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 6/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13?

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious  curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as last time, so far.  Lacroix doesn't belong to me.  Obviously.

**Chapter Six**

(A/N:  *screams in delight* Guess what!!!!!  It's been snowing for MORE THAN TWELVE HOURS STRAIGHT!!!!!!!!  I love New England!!!!!  I hope it continues throughout the weekend so we don't have school on Monday! R/R/E!)

            Lacroix swirled the bloodwine around in his goblet as he sat in his private apartment at the back of the Raven.  He had not heard from his son in almost three months.  Ever since Nicholas had drained the good doctor, he had been silent.  It was no different from the other numerous times Nicholas had stopped speaking to him, and yet…

            And yet…

            And yet, it felt different.  In the last few days, he had sensed much emotional turmoil from his son.  Most of the time, this brought Nick running to him.  But not this time.

            Lacroix sighed and took another sip of his drink.  While the good doctor had been in the hospital that day three months ago, he had decided to 'play nice' for a while.  Which, he had known, meant leaving his son *_completely* alone.  No monologues, no 'interfering', nothing.  He had to let Nicholas come back on his own._

            But he had never anticipated just how lonely it was without either of his children around.

            Bah!  He finished off the glass of bloodwine.  He did not need them, he did not need anyone.  Loneliness was for the weak, the insecure.  And he was *_neither*._

            Nicholas would eventually come back to him.  He always had, he always would.  He just needed time.  Lacroix was beginning to realize that perhaps he *_had* been going about this all wrong._

            Time heals all wounds.

            Time returns everything to its starting point.

            Time would bring Nicholas back to the fold.

~~~~{@

            Natalie sighed contentedly as she nestled more securely in Nick's arms.  They had just gotten back from the precinct, and had sat down to watch the news together.  Thus was one of the few times she felt safe once more.  If she could be grabbed right outside work, and no one noticed anything, then something could happen *_anywhere*.  Anywhere, that is, except when she was in Nick's arms.  Was she paranoid?  Yes.  But was it to be expected of her?  Once more, yes._

            Nick cuddled Natalie in his arms, resting his cheek on top of her head.  It was only when he was touching her, holding her, that he felt truly at ease.  She had been in the clutches of that sadistic freak for so short a time, but he had been helpless to go help her throughout most of it.  He had been terrified that he was going to lose her.  If he brought her across, no one would ever be able to do anything to her without her permission, ever again.  But how could he ask that of her?  How could he ask her to give up all of the sweet things in life and be condemned to eternal darkness, merely to ease his mind?

            Then came the question of how could he stand to watch the incessant creeping of Time consume her, if he did not bring her across.  What would he do if she died?  From the disease of Time or some more nefarious means, it would not matter.  She was the reason why he stayed in Toronto.  She was why his aimless wandering had ceased for the time being.  She was-

            His musings were interrupted by the presence of another vampire infringing on his consciousness.  He heard his master land under the skylight.

            "What a touching picture," Lacroix said sarcastically, as an announcement of his presence.

            "Have you ever heard of knocking?" Natalie asked, matching his tone of voice as she turned her head so she could see the ancient vampire.  The tightening of her hand on Nick's and her increased heart rate belied her calm voice.

            Nick squeezed her hand reassuringly and quickly moved so he was between his Master and Natalie.  "What do you want, Lacroix?"

            "Oh, do calm down, Nicholas.  I am not here to harm your precious Natalie," he spat.  "I was merely curious about all of the…disturbance from you as of late."

            Nick's disbelief was quite evident on his face.  Lacroix never wanted something as simple as that.  What dastardly plot did he have in mind this time?

            "Is it so unbelievable that a father could want to check on his son?" Lacroix asked, feigning sincerity.  Or was it feigned?

            "When you're the father in question?" Natalie asked.  "Yes."  Inside, she was quaking.  She knew of the promise Lacroix had extracted from Nick in return for his sister's life.  Had he come to collect his debt now?  She knew that Nicholas would fight to the death for her, but would it be enough?  Did she want to be brought across?  Yes.  But, not right now.  And, preferably, not by Lacroix.  So, to conceal her fear, she mouthed off to the ancient Roman general.  Probably not a wise thing to do.

            Nick prayed Natalie would hold her tongue.  It would not do to anger Lacroix.  "My *_father* is dead, buried, and long turned to dust.  What do you *__really* want?"_

            Inside, Lacroix sighed.  Was this what it had come to over the long years?  Had he truly only visited his protégé when he wanted something?  He prayed that this altruistic mood of his passed soon.

            "Perhaps I was worried that you and your incessant *_meddling* with mortal affairs had gotten you into trouble you could not get out of.  It *__has* happened *__before*."  Lacroix's eyes flashed in anger._

            Natalie watched them exasperatedly as her fear faded.  The more she saw of the two vampires interacting, the more she realized Nick was kind of blind when it came to Lacroix.  She did not think that Nick had been lying about the centuries of abuse and obsessive control, but she would bet that a big part of that was because Lacroix did see himself as Nick's father, and was parenting in the only way he knew how.  Right now, they were acting like a father and his teenage son.  Judging by their speech and body language, this was going to erupt into a family squabble.  _Boys will be boys, she thought with a sigh as she slid across the couch and transferred herself to her wheelchair.  Then she moved out to just behind and to the side of Nick.  Lacroix's eyes widened ever so slightly at the wheelchair._

            "It wasn't him, this time.  I managed to get myself into a bit of a fix."  She shrugged.  "He must have been a bit concerned about me."

            "Oh?"  Lacroix raised an eyebrow.  "A 'bit of a fix'?"

            "Kidnapping, torture, the usual ilk," she said dismissively.

            A slow smile spread across Lacroix's face.  "I see.  You will make a good addition to the community, when you are ready."

            "*_When* I'm ready," she reiterated, emphasizing the time._

            He nodded once, slowly.  "Well, my dear, I do hope you are better soon.  Nicholas," he paused.  "Well, it was infinitely more pleasurable conversing with the good doctor than you.  Good evening."

            He shot up through the skylight and out of sight.  Nick was quiet for a long moment, watching Natalie.  He wasn't quite sure if she was incredibly brave, incredibly smart, or incredibly stupid.  A mortal, sassing Lacroix.  Usually that ended with a very dead, very bloodless mortal.  When he had heard her moving behind him, the already-slow beating of his heart had almost stopped.  He could already sense Lacroix becoming angry, and *_knew* that Natalie would somehow antagonize him more._

            Natalie met his eyes calmly, waiting for the explosion.  His face was an unreadable mask.  As she waited, she concentrated on coming up with refutes to his predictable comments, and slowing her heart rate.

            "Are you insane, Nat?" he finally asked quietly.  "You practically just admitted that we have a relationship beyond mere friendship!"

            She rolled her eyes.  He *_had* to be kidding.  "And, of course, he didn't know before.  Nick, no offense love, but you really suck at hiding your feelings.  At least, when you're around Lacroix you do.  You didn't fool him at L'Azure that night."  Nick's eyes widened at her remembrance of that night.  He had thought that he had managed to hide that from her, even then with the bloodlink.  "Weren't you listening to the rest of the conversation?"_

            "What of it?  He threatened to bring you across!"

            "No he didn't.  He basically *_said* he wasn't going to *__do* anything unless I asked.  And that he may not approve of the foolishness his son is participating in, but he would not interfere."_

            "You don't *_know* Lacroix the way I do, Nat!"_

            "No, but that means I don't have any prejudices for the way he was acted in the past.  Everybody can change, Nick."

            "Not Lacroix," he said definitively.

            "Oh really?  You know, you're a vampire.  You don't deserve any more chances.  You could never change.  What was I thinking?  Goodbye, Nick, it's been nice knowing you."  She began wheeling to the lift to illustrate her point.

            Halfway there, she turned around and met his sad, sad eyes.  "You are *_so dense* sometimes.  Let me attempt to reiterate that in a way you will understand.  You are a vampire.  Most would argue that a vampire couldn't be good.  Yet, you did a pretty good job of *__changing*."_

            She paused for a breath, and Nick used that pause to break in.  "Nat, are you really arguing *_for* Lacroix?"_

            That didn't even give her pause.  "Yes.  Well, indirectly.  Everyone can change, and that includes Lacroix."

            "But…Lacroix, Nat?"  He looked frankly disbelieving.

            "Just…Look, Nick, try *_not* picking a fight with him next time you see him."_

            "I don't *_pick* fights!" he cried indignantly._

            Natalie looked down and began to rub the back of her neck.  She wished she was standing so she could look him in the eye without getting a crick in her neck.

            "*_Yes*, you do.  You bait him, he baits you, and you *__both* take it hook, line, sinker, and *__pole*, too."_

            "Then why don't you tell *_him* to stop baiting *__me*?"_

            "Because I can be sure *_you* aren't going to kill me if I tell you.  Be the bigger vampire here, Nick.  God, watching you two… He's right to call you his son.  You act just like a teenager with his parent."_

            Nick's mouth, already open for a comeback, snapped shut.  Perhaps she was right.  Had he ever *_truly* given Lacroix *__any* sort of chance?  They had been getting along much better until that fateful night.  After that, he had been avoiding his Master, for fear of him somehow finding out about how he really felt about Natalie.  Could it be possible… Could she be right?_

            "Maybe you're right, Nat," he said quietly, looking away.  "I don't know.  I don't know anything anymore."

            Natalie sighed.  "Damn it, I can't fight with you, Nick," she said as she dropped her head into her hands.  "It takes too much out of me."

            She scrubbed her hands across her eyes, then looked up.  His eyes were fixed on a spot on the floor.  He had gone from being relatively happy to miserable in under and hour.  Oh, his wonderful mood swings.

            "Get over here so I can hug you," she said, standing up.  Six more days.  Six more days and she wouldn't have to use the stupid wheelchair anymore.

            Nick wrapped his arms around her, burying his face in her silky chestnut hair.  This entire year had thrown his world for a loop.  First, Schanke and Cohen died, then Natalie almost had her heart put on the black market; he was shot in the head and suffered from amnesia, then got possessed by a demon.  Of course, there was the fever, that damn virtual reality game, Janette had become mortal - *_his* dream - and he had brought her back across.  Divia had almost killed him, the whole Francesca thing, and Tracy was short.  Of course, he couldn't forget that he had almost killed Natalie.  And so, the glass was slowly drained - half empty, two thirds empty, three quarters empty, only a sip left…_

            And, as always, events turned around.  Natalie lived and didn't hate him.  Someone brought Vachon back, and he brought Tracy across.  The 'guardian angels' told Nick how to be able to be intimate with Natalie, and it worked.  Natalie (and Sydney, of course) moved in with him.  The glass got fuller and fuller.

            And then Natalie was kidnapped and brutally tortured.

            Just to keep him completely off balance, Lacroix was leaving him in peace.  Nick was tense all of the time because, by all rights, Lacroix should be coming to collect his debt.  It was quite like the calm before the storm.  His emotions were running on high.

            Tonight, he was sure that night had come.  He was prepared to fight to the death for Natalie.  His fear for her safety made him confrontational, even though that would only inflame Lacroix's temper.  When he really did appear to only be concerned for Nick's safety…the one sure thing in Nick's life - Lacroix's evilness - was gone, and he could not let go of it.

            Perhaps Natalie was right, and Lacroix was changing.

            Perhaps he was wrong once more.

            The emotional roller coaster he had been on, the fear for Natalie's safety both when she was kidnapped and the general threat from Lacroix, were slowly taking its toll on him.

            Natalie could feel Nick shaking.  His arms clung to her with a fierce neediness.  She could feel a slight wetness trickling down her neck, and knew he was weeping.  She knew that the one thing he could be sure of in his eternally long life was that Lacroix was Evil.  And she had just half-argued that out of him.  Maybe she should have left that alone, and kept her thoughts to herself.

            "I'm sorry, Nick," she said quietly as she stroked his hair.

            "All I could think was that you were going to get yourself killed.  He's killed people for less than that."

            "I'm sorry, Nick."  She turned her head and kissed his cheek, kissing up the bloodtears on that side of his face.  She had never actually seen him cry before.  The fact that he was allowing the bloodtears to fall freely showed her just how scared he had been.

            "To get you back from that monster only to loose you to him," he whispered.

            "I'm sorry," she said once more.  "I don't think before I talk, sometimes.  I hide my fear behind my tongue."

            Nick rested his forehead on hers.  "I can't impress on you enough how treacherous Lacroix is."

            "Okay."  She continued to kiss his scratchy cheeks and bloodtears as she talked.  "I'll remember that.  I won't cut him any slack if I ever see him again."

            "You will, Nat," Nick said dolefully.  "You will."

            Natalie kissed each of his eyelids.  It was so easy to forget that everything she did or said affected him.  She rubbed his nose with her own.

            "Go wash off your face, love.  Abel should be here soon, and questions about why your cheeks are stained red wouldn't be good.'

            He sighed and dropped his head to her shoulder for a moment.  "Maybe you're right, Nat.  And I guess I do pick fights with him.  Just…be careful.  Don't antagonize him."

            "Okay, I promise.  Now scat."  She waited until he had disappeared into the bathroom on that floor before collapsing into her wheelchair with a muffled groan.  Her knees - especially her left one - felt like someone was driving white-hot stakes through them.  Technically, she wasn't supposed to take any pain medication for another two hours.  But, she wheeled herself over to the counter and popped two pills in her mouth anyways.

            She jumped and stifled a shriek when she felt a pair of hands drop on her shoulders.  "Don't *_do* that Nick!"_

            "Sorry, Nat."  He nuzzled her neck, his melancholy mood almost completely evaporated.  "Know what we need built here, Nat?"

            He waited expectantly until she said, "What?"

            "A guest bedroom.  Think about it!  What if Sarah and Amy want to come for a visit?  Where would they sleep?  You three upstairs and me on the couch?  Wouldn't a guest room be better?"

            Natalie smiled as she turned around.  "You say that like I'm going to argue with you.  It sounds like a good idea to me."

            "Really?"  His face lit up like a little boy at Christmas.  "Because, I figure I can get it done in a week."

            "That soon?"  Her grin widened at his excitement.

            "Uh-huh," he affirmed.  "Because, what if Abel can't find an apartment?  He can't sleep on the couch forever.  And does he seem like a person who knows how to live on his own?"  He suddenly paused.  "Well, I mean, if that's okay with you.  I mean-"

            "Nick," Natalie laughed and held up her hands.  "Stop.  He's a sweet kid, I like him.  Don't worry about it."

            Nick smiled, and bent down to kiss Natalie.  "I need to call the guys who do all my renovating."

            Natalie laughed.  "You're so *_cute* when you're excited about something!"_

            Nick smiled boyishly at her and gave her a quick peck on the cheek.  Natalie's grin grew as he walked over to the phone and picked it up, wandering further back into the loft as he dialed.  She wondered if he got this excited every time he began a new project.

            She watched the news for another couple minutes.  Snow forecasted in the weather for tomorrow.  She sighed.  Ah, the joys of living in Canada.

            The buzzer for the door rang, making her jump.  Nick was still on the phone, so she went and checked the security camera.  Of course, it was Abel, glancing around nervously.  She pressed the intercom button.

            "Hi Abel.  Take the lift to the second floor."  She deactivated the alarm and unlocked the door.

            She heard the lift activating and reset the alarms on the outer doors.  Nick wandered his way back into the room.

            "All right," he said into the phone.  "Tonight, if you can.  Right.  Thanks, goodbye."  He hung up and replaced the phone in its stand.  "That Abel, Nat?"

            She nodded.  "Yeah.  Hey, Nick… Are you still working on holidays so guys with families can have the day off?"

            That stopped him, and he crouched down so hew as on eyelevel with her.  "I don't know," he said, nuzzling her cheek, "because now I've got a family of my own."

            Natalie laughed and kissed him as the door to the loft groaned open.  "I just wanted to know if I should start asking my supervisor for holidays off."

            "We'll talk about it later," he said as he straightened up.  Abel was standing against the back wall of the lift, shaking slightly.  There was a suitcase on either side of him.  "Hey," Nick said, "come on in.  Do you have anything else down in your car?"

            Abel shook his head quickly, nervously as he picked up his bags and came out into the room.  "Thanks for letting me stay with you."

            "No problem," Natalie told him as she turned her chair to turn off the TV.  Then she just *_froze*._

            Nick snapped around as he heard her heart begin to race.  Her eyes were fixed on the TV screen.  It was a news report.  Someone had finally told the press that the serial had been apprehended.  They were saying that, and that there was no other information given.  They flashed a picture of Kane's mug shots, and were trying to get a statement out of Tracy and Reese.  Nick fumbled for his universal remote as the report ended.  Then, Natalie seemed to give herself a little shake.

            Nick moved to her side and crouched down.  "Are you okay, Nat?" he asked as he caressed her cheek.

            "Yeah."  She smiled at him.  "It's just… weird.  I see that on TV, and realize, hey!  I was part of that!  Indirectly, I'm on TV!"

            Nick paused for a long moment, staring at her.  He did not believe her in the least.  But, he finally laughed a little.  "Whatever you say, Nat."

            "There's no guest bedroom," she said to Abel like nothing had happened, "so you're on the couch again.  There's nowhere to put your stuff, really, so just leave it by the couch.  Is that really all you have?"

            He nodded warily.  "I never needed a lot."  He walked over to the couch and put the two suitcases next to it.  "I'll pay rent for as long as I have to stay here."

            Nick glanced quickly at Natalie before saying, "Don't worry about it."

            "Okay, are you sure about that?  I mean-"

            "Hey," Natalie interrupted gently.  "Weren't you the one who said you had _no money?"  _

Abel nodded, vocalizing his assent.  "Yes, but I get my paycheck tomorrow.  I just have to have it rerouted, right?"

            "Yeah," Nick said.  "But then you have to open a bank account for yourself, and you need first-of if you find an apartment.  And car insurance and anything else like that.  Don't worry about it."

            "Okay."  Natalie could see relief in his eyes.  "Thank you so much for this."

            Natalie smiled slightly.  "Just don't touch the green bottles in the fridge.  Everything else is fair game.  And don't mess with the shades.  Nick's severely allergic to the sun."

            Abel nodded again.  "Um… I have to go to work…" He looked like he was afraid they were going to say he couldn't, or something.

            "Oh, yeah, sorry," Natalie said.  "Where do you work?"

            "I'm the night clerk down at the video store," he said nervously as he walked past them.  Nick noticed that he arced slightly around them - not very noticeable, but it was there.  He recognized it as the way *_he* used to walk around Lacroix when he was just a fledgling - keeping himself slightly out of their reach so they couldn't hurt him._

            "See you later," Nick said.

            "Uh, yeah," Abel replied.  "Bye."

            He disappeared into the lift.  Natalie looked at Nick as the door rumbled closed.

            "Oh my God," she said softly.  "He just makes me want to cry."  In fact, her eyes were filling with tears.  But Nick was sure they weren't for Abel.

            "I know, Nat, I know."  He scooped her up and carried her over to the couch, her usual protests not forthwith coming.  She just curled her arms around his neck and buried her head in his shoulder.

            "Dear God," she said, clutching him tightly.  "I can't imagine going through what I went through over and over." Nick cuddled her close to him, stroking her hear.  "I swear, in those twenty-four hours…he *_never* slept.  I'd get peace for ten, maybe fifteen minutes…"_

            Nick held her close, kissing the top of her head.  He had already figured out how to hold her without hurting her, being careful where he put his arms.  She was trembling in his arms.  Perhaps having Abel here was not a good idea.

            "It never stopped, no matter what I did.  I would beg.  I would promise I would do anything, and he would laugh.  He'd laugh and hit me harder.  You have *_no idea* the utter hopelessness that comes when you know that nothing you do can stop the pain."  She started to cry, clutching tightly to him as he held her in his lap.  "And all I could think," she sobbed, "was that there was no way you could find me.  The guy was too good.  I knew I was going to die.  He was going to rape me and kill me.  And it couldn't come soon enough for me."_

            Nick held her tight against him.  She was shaking with the force of her sobs.  The abject loneliness and terror in her voice struck him to the very core.  He wasn't quite sure if the TV or Abel had set this off, but he knew it was probably one of those things.  He didn't even have to ask her to know that she would *_never* consider therapy.  Even though she dearly needed it, she would not go.  He hadn't brought up the issue, yet, but he knew her answers already._

            "I would *_never* let that happen," he whispered into her ear, nibbling on her earlobe slightly.  "If it meant I had to sell whatever's left of my soul, if I had to go out in the sun, if it meant my death, I'd find you and make sure you were okay."  He kissed the top of her head, the part of her face not buried in his shoulder, as much as he could, as if that could make her pain go away._

            Natalie clung to him, like he was a rock in the middle of a raging ocean.  "But there were no clues.  And you only had one suspect.  Everyone knows that the first suspect never pans out.  Even if they're the one who did it, it takes a while."  She had to force the words out from between her sobs.  "And while I was lying on that floor, shivering and hurting… I was going to die alone.  Alone and…" She started sobbing so hard that she couldn't continue.

            Natalie shivered and trembled and sobbed in Nick's arms.  She felt so dirty.  She didn't deserve Nick's love.  She hadn't even had the strength to stand up for herself for an hour.  She was weak and pathetic.  How could Nick not find her disgusting for giving up so easily?

            Nick did not know what she was thinking, but her sobs tore at his heart.  He had been too late, all because of his damn curse!  If only… He did not have the words to tell her how much he loved her, how much he needed her, and how infinitely sorry he was that he hadn't been there in time.  As usual, he had no idea what to say, so he let her feel it, instead.

            She started to sob harder at first, as she felt the warm feelings wash over her from their tiny link.  How could he still love her?  How could he still care for her that much?  How could he blame himself?  Nick stroked her hair and murmured soothing nothings into her ear.  He could feel it beginning to work almost immediately as she quieted down.

            Nick rocked her in his lap and comforted her until she had quieted down to only an occasional sniffle.  As she scrubbed her arm across her face, wiping away the tears, he could almost literally *_see* her professional mask slipping into place._

            "Can we put in a movie, Nick?" she asked hopefully once her tears had stopped.  "Something funny?  I need to laugh."

            He kissed her temple and gently transferred her off of his lap.  "Of course, Nat."  He got up and popped in one of her favorite comedies, and sat back down next to her.  She snuggled into his arms, and there they sat, watching the bright images on the screen.


	7. Putting Up Christmas

Author:The Wanlorn

Title:A World in a Grain of Sand 7/?

Summary:This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:PG13 for language

Spoilers:I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:Ask, and ye shall receive.Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:Same as all of the last times, so far.

**Chapter Seven**

Natalie swore viciously at the base of the stairs, seeing Abel cringe out of the corner of her eye.She was at the bottom of the stairs, in the blasted wheelchair, and everything she needed was upstairs.It was three days after her little meltdown.She had been fine, since then, pushing everything in the back of her mind.She *_still* couldn't walk, and her bad knee was now acting up because of the stress put on it.Seeing as how it was the first of December, she had decided it was time to 'put up Christmas'.And, all of *__her* Christmas supplies were upstairs, in storage._

Nick was immediately by her side."What?" He turned his head slightly and rolled his eyes at Abel, who was trembling slightly.But, even in his fear, his lips twitched slightly in a half-smile.

Natalie glared at Nick."Don't you *_dare* roll your eyes at him.If you're sick of me, then I'll leave."_

"No, no," Nick quickly assured her."What's the matter, besides the fact that you obviously need to go upstairs?"

"I *_hate* this stupid wheelchair.I hate these friggin' treacherous legs.And my stupid *__knees*.It's almost worth being-" She stopped abruptly, glancing slightly at Abel.Nick could see that she had been just about to say 'brought across to get rid of the pain'._

He scooped her up, unresisting, in his arms, and folded up the wheelchair and stuck it under his other arm."Come on, let's go get everything you need.And you can scream and swear at me all you want upstairs."

She made a grumpy noise as he headed up the stairs.All of her stuff was in a storage room next to the room that was being turned into a guest room.Natalie had no idea where Nick found guys who were willing to work nights, but they were in there now, working away.

Nick put her down at the top of the stairs, and she doggedly started pushing her way to the storage room.Her arms and shoulders *_killed*.But she would never admit that to Nick.It was bad enough that he had to carry her up and down flights of stairs.She had started increasing her dosage of painkillers.But yesterday, when she realized that this was how addictions started, she went back down to the prescribed dosage.It was wreaking havoc on her knees._

Nick grabbed the handles on the back, stopping her in her tracks."What?" she snapped irritably.

Nick began pushing her to the bedroom.She folded her hands in her lap, not quite willing to protest the free ride."We're going to the bedroom," Nick informed her."I want to talk to you in private."

Once inside the bedroom, Nick transferred Natalie to their bed.He sat next to her, and cuddled her in his arms, smoothing back her hair.

"How badly do your knees hurt?" he asked."And don't lie to me.I'm not going to try and make you go to a doctor."

"Oh, really?"She didn't believe him, and that was evident in her voice.

"I promise."He lightly kissed the side of her head."You can stake me if I'm lying."

She sighed, snuggling closer to Nick."Yes, they hurt.They hurt a lot, and the pain medication isn't really working.My bad one's acting up again.I don't care *_what* they said.There is definitely destroyed cartilage in both of them.But what can I do about it?"_

Nick stroked her hair silently for a long moment.Natalie could tell he was thinking, weighing something in his head.She was patient as patient could be, enjoying being held in his arms while she could.His body may have been cold, but it still gave her warmth.

Nick finally spoke quietly."Nat, I know you won't go see a doctor, and maybe get an operation to fix your knees.Which is why I'm suggesting this."He paused, rethinking the whole thing once more.

Natalie waited for a little bit, snuggling into his arms.She knew he was going to suggest something that had to do with his vampirism.She didn't care, as long as she could walk again."Nick, please.This is driving me insane.I have to depend on you for everything.It's driving me crazy."

"Okay, well, if…if I give you a mouthful of my blood, it will probably speed up your metabolism just enough, for just long enough, that your body would heal."He looked at her with worried eyes, to see her reaction.

She raised an eyebrow."Probably?" she questioned."You don't sound all that sure of yourself."

"Well, I've never actually done it, only heard that it could be done."

"So, basically, you have no idea what you're doing."She smiled at him to take the sting out of her matter-of-fact words.

"No, not that," he quickly assure her."I know what I'm doing.I just don't know if it will work.Or if it will begin to bring you across."

"Would that really matter? I mean, you know that, if I can't cure you in my lifetime, I want to be brought across.And if it's sooner rather than later, what does it matter?Please, Nick, I seriously can't take this anymore.I'm just a weak mortal…"

"Mortal, yes, but weak, never.You're the strongest person I know."He allowed his fangs to descend and bit open his wrist, sucking a little to bring the red fluid up to the surface.His slow-pumping blood would not well up on its own."Here."He put his wrist in front of her face."Just a mouthful," he warned as she took it hesitantly, bringing it up to her mouth.

Nick closed his eyes and sighed as he felt her sucking on his wrist.It felt so good.It had been a long time since he had allowed someone to take *_his* blood.The erotic sensations it produced were not forgotten, and he longed for them.All too soon, Natalie pulled away, licking her lips._

She lay back against him, sighing happily.Had she been aroused, and not tired and pissed, that would have been an intensely erotic experience.She wasn't quite sure what made it so different from him taking her blood, but it was.And she could taste how much he wished he could experience her taking his blood more often, but knew the danger was far, far too great.She had gotten his feelings and emotions, and more scenes of his past.But, somehow, it was more intense than when he took her blood.Even though there had been no physical sex involved, the rush of emotion had left her feeling the way she did after a powerful orgasm.

Nick kissed the tip of her nose."Stay here and rest, Nat.You need to give my blood time to got through your system and heal you.Okay?"

"Rest?It's not even midnight, Nick," she protested."How am I supposed to rest when I'm still wide awake?"

Nick laughed at that statement. "Rest, not sleep.Read your book for a little while, or something.I'll bring all of your Christmas supplies downstairs, and then come get you, okay?"

She sighed, allowing him to get up."Fine.Don't forget about me in your zeal for carrying heavy boxes."

Nick laughed even more as he left the room.He saw her picking up the book she was reading from its spot on the nightstand.He prayed this would work, and not start the cycle of bringing her across.

The boxes that had her decorations in them were right in the front of the storage room.He spared a peek in on the guys in the soon-to-be guest room.It was coming along nicely, and really would be ready in about four days.

Of course, that brought his ever-wandering thoughts to Abel.He was surprised to find that having the young man living at the loft was not such a bad thing.He actually seemed to have a sort of calming effect on Natalie.So far, he hadn't questioned why Nick didn't eat and why he was forever drinking wine.Abel, too, was a night person.He went to work every night, and didn't return until almost dawn.Tonight was his night off.When he was at the loft, he was quiet as a mouse, unless directly spoken to.He acted as though he were afraid this sudden good turn was going to end any minute, and he was trying to forestall it by being on his best behavior and not giving them a reason to think of him.He bought his own newspaper and poured over the Classified Ads every night, along with any house magazines he could find.But there was nothing that was in his price range.Truthfully, Nick would not mind him staying for a while, at least for the holidays.

Nick finally carried the last box down, putting it with the rest in the middle of the floor. For someone who lived in an apartment, she had a *_lot* of Christmas decorations.Then he began bringing down *__his* boxes.At least, the modern ones.Once everything was in a pile, he stood staring at it.He turned his head to look at Abel, who was sitting in a corner of the couch.No matter where he sat, he always seemed scrunched up, like he was trying to take up the least space and make himself unnoticeable.It was easy to see that his entire life was based on making himself invisible to others._

"What do you think?" Nick asked, making Abel jump."Should I go get her?Or leave her up there for a little bit and give us both a break from having to listen to her?"

Abel smiled slightly, unsure of how to respond.He was saved from having to come up with something, because Natalie yelled from the bedroom.

"I heard that, Nicholas B. Knight!Get that cute butt up here right now!Or else, I swear, I'm coming down those stairs!"

Nick grinned."It's almost worth it just to see that!" he said as he went up the stairs.

Natalie was grinning when he entered the room."Didn't want to risk me actually doing it?"

He laughed and kissed her, gentle and sweet."I'll come back for you," he said as he folded up the wheelchair.He deposited that by the bottom of the stairs, and then got her.

"Did it work?" he whispered into her ear.

"I think so," she replied just as quietly."But it will look suspicious if, all of a sudden, I can walk."

"Tell me if you start feeling funny in the next couple days," he murmured as he set her in the wheelchair.

"Will do, Captain Obvious," she said sarcastically."Hey!That's more boxes than I had."

Nick smiled slightly, his gaze far away."I have some stuff, I just never put them out before."

She grinned and moved over to the pile of boxes."Anything marked 'Ornaments' can be moved out of the way right now," she said, "hint, hint."

Nick laughed."Is that 'hint, hint, move them now' or 'hint, hint, go buy a tree tomorrow'?"

Natalie grinned."That means move them, please, and you better be taking me to pick out a tree tomorrow."

"As milady commands," he said with a smile as he began moving the ornament boxes.

Natalie could see Abel watching them furtively from the corner of the couch.He was the most timid person she had ever seen.He never joined anything unless asked, and was *_always* on time for everything.If he was asked to do something, he did it immediately.She had learned quickly to phrase any question in such a way that he could not take it as a command.She could see a particular longing in his eyes as he quickly turned away and fixed his eyes on the book in his hands._

"Do you want to come help?" she asked.

His head snapped around so he could meet her eyes.The slightly confused look in his eyes - which appeared there a lot, whenever she asked a question like that - clearly said that he had no idea how to answer that.She could almost see his mind racing, trying to decide if it was a trick question or not.

"It's a yes or no question," she said, her smile growing."Either you want to help, or you could care less and that book is a hundred times more interesting."

He hesitantly put down his book."I…I want to help, if that's okay."

"Of course it's okay," she said as Nick deposited the last ornament box in the corner."We need to go through all of these boxes and see if there's anything we actually *_want* to put out."_

"You say that like we're going to end up putting most everything back in the boxes and back upstairs," Nick joked.

"Well, gee, Nick," she said with a grin."Most of these boxes are yours.And you are a guy.And men, traditionally, have really bad taste."

"And have I ever exhibited anything but impeccable taste?" he returned.

"Which leaves me questioning your masculinity," she shot back, before beginning to laugh.Abel was just staring at them."I give.We have to go through everything and see if there's anything we want to put back in a box.Happy?"

"Very," said Nick.Then he turned to Abel."Pick a box."

Abel walked in that little, almost unnoticeable arc, and hesitantly dragged a box a few inches away, kneeling by it and looking up at them.He flinched slightly as Nick bent down to grab a box.Once he saw Natalie and Nick opening their boxes and beginning to take things out, he cautiously did the same.

Natalie had transferred herself to the floor, glad that her knees no longer hurt.The rest of her body ached less, too.Soon, she had a small pile of decorations around her.Nick wasn't doing too bad, himself.But Abel was going slowly, keeping a wary eye on the couple.He stopped to admire almost every knickknack he took out, looking it over closely and smiling slightly.

"I can put things on the piano, right Nick?" Natalie asked as she got back into the wheelchair and piled little boxes filled with decorations into her lap.

"As long as they're not going to leave a mark," he replied absently.Natalie could tell he was lost in thought as he turned a snowman over in his hands.

"Okay, then I'm going to put this Christmas mug there," she said to see if he was paying attention.

"Sure, as long as it's- No you don't!Not unless it's on a coaster!"

She grinned and detected a slight twitch of Abel's lips."Just seeing if you were paying attention."She began setting things on the flat surfaces of his piano.A porcelain reindeer went on either side of the music stand.There was just enough room on the edge of the open top for her to put two nutcrackers.That was all she was able to carry on her lap.She sat regarding the piano silently for a long moment, trying to decide if there was any way to put a garland along it without using tape or staples.

She decided there was no way she could get away with that, so she turned and went back to the pile.The next box she opened was wreaths and garlands.That one got pushed off to the side - Nick could put them up where she directed when Abel was gone, so he could fly them up.

She opened another box to find a tangled mass of wires and bulbs."Nick, there's a *_reason* why people put lights away carefully."_

"Because they are obsessive-compulsive?" he asked innocently.

"Sure, Nick, sure," she said sarcastically."Fine, but I'm holding *_my* tree lights hostage until *__you* untangle yours."_

"You can't," he said as he put a Santa snow globe on a bookshelf."I already know which box they're in, and I already hid them."

"Liar," she said as she laughed."But if we get a giant tree, we're going to need both sets.I don't want to use my fake tree this year.You don't get the same smell…" She smiled faintly, remembering the evergreen scent of her childhood."What do you usually do for Christmas?" she asked Abel.As soon as the words left her mouth, she regretted her tactlessness.

Abel didn't show any reaction to her question, answering quietly, "We never did anything.At least, not since I can remember."He shrugged.

Natalie could see that he was leaving much out, but she kept quiet.She and Nick chatted as they set out everything.They tried to include Abel in their conversation, but he stuck to relatively monosyllabic answers.They didn't give up, though.

Around two in the morning, Natalie pronounced the loft sufficiently decorated.Nick looked around and had to agree that they had stopped at the right point - there were just enough knickknacks and holiday paraphernalia, but not too much.Natalie seemed to have a knack for knowing where to put everything.Abel looked around with a slight smile on his face, admiring what they had done.Natalie had Nick wrap green and red garland around the railing going up the stairs and along the catwalk.Later, they would probably hang some from any doorways, and put out a Nativity.

Natalie stretched."I vote we get something delivered, instead of making something."Nick nodded, even though his vote shouldn't really count, and Natalie looked at Abel."What do you want?"

His mouth gaped for a moment.Natalie and Nick had both become used to this over the past three days.They would ask an opinion of him, and he would gape for a couple seconds, with panicked eyes, before answering.

"Ch-Chinese?" he stuttered, flinching back slightly as he said it.

"Ah ha!" Natalie exclaimed."A man after my own heart!"She grabbed the menu from its place by the phone and held it out to him, waiting patiently until he got the courage to take it."That's where we usually order from.What do you want?"

He scanned through quickly."Ma Fa Ho Ming," he said quietly, holding the paper back out to her.She could see it shaking slightly.

After taking it back, she called in their order.Nick set out plates and silverware, so they would not have to do it later, when the food came.Natalie rolled out into the middle of the floor and turned in a slow circle, grinning.

"Do we know how to decorate a place, or what?"

"We're good," said Nick, smiling too.Her smile, her laugh was infectious to him."I forgot how much fun decorating for holidays could be."

Natalie caught Abel mouthing something out of the corner of her eyes."What'd you say?" she asked, her eyes still sparkling happily.Christmastime was always a happy time during her childhood, a time when she rarely had to go stay with her Nana.

"Christmas music," he said quietly, his eyes cast down.

"I knew we forgot something!" Natalie exclaimed, glancing at Nick with a slight smile.

She put in a CD from her collection, seeing as how Nick barely had any.She would have preferred that Nick play something for them, but knew that the odds of him acquiescing were slim.So, she didn't bother asking.Maybe she could convince him later.

They listened quietly until the buzzer for the door rang.Natalie and Abel both jumped at mile at the sound.Nick glanced at the monitor and saw that it was the delivery guy.He pressed the intercom button and told him to take the lift to the second floor.Within a few minutes, a very nervous delivery guy appeared, Chinese food in hand.Nick paid him and set the food on the counter.

"What do you want to drink?" he asked Abel.Natalie had started tea for herself while they were waiting for their food to arrive.

"Water please," was the quiet reply.

Nick set a glass down in front of him, and poured himself a mug of bloodwine.Although Natalie claimed that it didn't really bother her anymore, he still tried to keep the red liquid out of sight.And now that Abel was staying with them, although the blood looked like a fine red wine, he was still careful to only drink from mugs.

Natalie chowed down on her pork rice with chopsticks.She kept half an eye on Abel, seeing that he handled chopsticks with some skill.Nick leaned against the counter, watching them eat.Abel's eyes kept flicking from his plate to Nick and back down to his plate.He did not make eye contact - he never made eye contact - but his eyes would glance up to about Nick's shoulder and go back down.

"Nick," Natalie finally said, "sit down.You're making me nervous."

"Sorry."Nick said, sitting down.But his eyes glanced at Abel, knowing Natalie had said it for the young man's benefit.Nick was struck by the difference between Abel at his house, and Abel sitting here with them.He had been friendly and relatively outgoing when Nick and Tracy had been there to question Kane, but it had seemed forced.In retrospect, it was almost as though that was how he had been told to act if anyone came knocking.As soon as Kane had come home, his mood changed.Now, he was timid as timid could be, unsure of everything.Rarely did his icy blue eyes sparkle, if ever.It was almost like two different people.

They ate the meal with the silence filled with meaningless chitchat between Nick and Natalie.As usual, Abel refused to be included in the conversation.Instead, he shoveled food into his mouth, eating quickly.Natalie could see in his eyes, the few times they chanced to meet hers by accident, that he was afraid they were going to take it away from him.

Out of the corner of her eyes, she saw him pause in eating and reach to pick up his glass of water.She would guess there was enough left for a single sip.He misjudged his reach, and his fingers brushed the front, causing the glass to tip over.Able froze, a panicked look suffusing his face.Tears sparkled in his eyes.

"I'm sorry," he immediately said, his voice filled with fear."I didn't mean to.I'll clean it up."

He stood up and flinched as Nick reached across the table.But Nick merely dropped a napkin on the small spill and pressed it down for a moment, soaking up the water.

"It's only water," he said gently."I think the table will live."

After standing uncertainly for a few seconds, Abel gingerly sat back down.Nick could hear his heart racing, and he was shaking.But relief - mixed with distrust - shown in his eyes.Natalie smiled reassuringly at him as she chewed on some rice.She could not imagine being scared of a bit of spilled water.It was so easy to clean up, and didn't leave a stain.What was so bad about it?But, looking at Abel, who was staring at his plate with his hands in his lap, she could only imagine.

She and Nick shared a Look.They had talked last night about broaching the subject of therapy for Abel.They knew he needed it, and that no one else would think about it.But they weren't quite sure how to do it.Natalie could hear the hinting in Nick's voice that perhaps it would be good for her, too, but she ignored it.She was fine.Abel, which was made quite obvious right now, was not.Nick shrugged slightly, meaning that he had no clue how to start the conversation.They knew that they had to be careful what they said to Abel and how they said it.This was a conversation best left for later.

(A/N:I'm thinking of trying to do a short chapter from Abel's perspective.Yes?No?Maybe so?Save Farscape!!!!!!!*runs away shouting wildly*)


	8. Christmas Trees

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 8/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.

**Chapter Eight**

            Natalie inhaled deeply and smiled as she stood next to Nick in the tree lot.  He had taken her, just as he had promised.  They offered to bring Abel, but he had to go in to the video store early that night.  Nick kept an arm around Natalie's waist as they walked up and down the rows of trees.  Their little experiment had worked - her knees were okay enough to walk.

            He pointed out a big tree to her.  "How about that one?"

            She looked it over.  It was netted up, so the branches were pointed up to the sky, and buyers couldn't tell if it had any bare spots.  Or, at least, that was the idea.

            "It's got a huge bare spot in the back," she told him, and they continued on.

            Nick saw another one that looked okay a little bit later.  "That one?"

            "Too skinny and too dry," Natalie immediately said.

            Nick shrugged and laughed, squeezing her slightly.  "You're going to be picky about his, aren't you?"  She had stopped and looked at several trees between the two he pointed out, and rejected all of them.

            "Of course.  That's half the fun."  She leaned her head on his arm as they walked.  Eventually, it started to snow lightly.  The trees looked even better with the light dusting of white on the green boughs.

            They went though a long round of Nick suggesting a tree and her rejecting it for some reason or other.  Eventually -and Nick was positive that this was because she was getting cold - he suggested one and Natalie could find nothing wrong with it.  Nick dragged it by the trunk to the front of the lot, where the owner was staying.  He paid what he considered to be an exorbitant fee for a *_tree_*, and the guy helped him tie it to the top of Natalie's car.

            He turned to her in the car.  Her cheeks and nose were tinged red from the cold air, and she looked positively jubilant.

            "How about if, next year, we both take off a week or two from work and go to the Brabant Estate for Christmas?" he asked.

            "Really?" she said excitedly.  "You still own it?"

            Nick nodded.  "I'm the last surviving heir, and I keep passing it on to my 'son' every so often."

            "And no one has gotten suspicious?" Natalie asked in frank amazement.

            "Nope.  Well, the same family of servants has worked there since I was born.  I'm sure they know something's up, but they don't care because they have free run of the place when I'm not there."

            "That sounds excellent," she said, grinning.

            Nick smiled and leaned over to kiss her, keeping half an eye on the road.  "I'm glad.  I've wanted to show you my home."

            When they got back to the loft, Nick dragged the tree into the lift with them.  Then he leaned it against the wall once they were upstairs.

            "Nick, you have a tree stand, right?" Natalie said, struck by that sudden thought.

            "I do, but it's still upstairs.  But before I get that, didn't you want to put that garland up somewhere?  Like maybe over the doorway to our bedroom?"

            "Yeah, but… ohhhhh."  It suddenly dawned on her what he was suggesting, and her face lit up.

            He handed her the garland of faux pine.  Then he stopped.  "Do you trust me?" he asked seriously.

            She nodded.  "Of course I do.  Sometimes, you're the only one I trust."

            He gently picked her up ad cradled her in his arms.  She linked her arms loosely around his neck, the garland trailing down his back, and kissed the hollow where his neck met his shoulder.  Slowly, he levitated up to the level of the catwalk, forgoing use of the stairs.  A grinning Natalie looked around avidly, admiring the bird's-eye view.  Yes, she got the view when she stood at the rail of the catwalk, but that was a slight angled view.  Rising straight up from the piano, that was a different view.  He flew slowly over to land on the catwalk by their bedroom, laughing inside as Natalie looked around like a curious little girl.

            "Oh wow," she breathed when they landed.  "Even just in the loft, that's great!"

            He laughed out loud at that and levitated up to the top of the door.

            "Promise you won't drop me?" she asked with a smile.

            "Cross my heart and hope to die," was his quick response.

            She let go of her light grasp around his neck and reached out to the corner of the door, tacking the end of the garland there with the tacks that Nick had handed her.  She let a bit of it land down the side, and let it arc before tacking it to the middle.

            "Move over a bit," she told Nick, to which he happily obliged.

            She tacked the last piece on the opposite end, leaving a little swag.  It looked plain to her, though.  Very plain.  She put her arms back around his neck before speaking.

            "We need a bow, or something, for the middle," she told Nick.

            "Are you holding on?" he queried, feeling her nod.

            He secured his grip slightly on her, making sure that there was no possible way he could drop her.  Then he went up and over the edge of the rail, swooping down to the floor.  Natalie let out a shriek as they went down.  He landed lightly on the floor, setting her on her feet.  She clung to his side for balance for a few seconds, laughing.

            "That was cruel," she told him.  But the wide grin on her face ruined the statement.  "Cruel, but oh so fun!"

            Nick laughed, nuzzling her cheek.  "Better than a roller coaster?"

            "Much better."  She giggled girlishly.  "Promise me that you'll take me flying some time?  For real?  Outside?"

            "I promise."  He kissed her cheek.  "A giant red bow for the middle?  I've got a mistletoe ball we can put there, too."

            "You have to find it, though," she said, looking up at him.  "I'm not going anywhere near those boxes of yours."  The one thing he did *_not_* pack neatly were his Christmas decorations.  *_Saying* he had something was one thing.  *_Finding_* it, another._

            "I know where everything is in those boxes," he told her smugly.  "It's only you who can't find any of the things you're looking for."

            "Prove it," she said with a laugh, shoving him away slightly.  "I'll give you five minutes."

            He stepped away and was back within seconds, objects in hand.  "Here you go."

            "Not fair," she said petulantly.  "Not only did you use your speed, you must have found those yesterday."

            "You never said I couldn't do either."  He rubbed noses with her.  "I win.  Ready to go up?" he asked as he lifted her into his arms.

            "Of course."  She grinned as he flew her up and hovered there, as the tacked the two things up.  After landing, he set her down under the mistletoe.  Immediately, he locked her lips in a deep kiss, probing her mouth with his tongue.  She eagerly accepted him, sucking gently on his tongue as it searched her mouth.  She missed the taste of his mouth, in the short time she had been bereft of it.  Since he had rescued her, all she had received were sweet, gently kisses.  She had begun to seriously doubt her desirability to him.  She knew she was going to have scars, ugly scars, and that was the last thing she needed.  But there was little she could do about hat.  It wasn't her fault.

            Well, that was what she kept telling herself, at least.  She didn't really believe it.  Maybe Nick was right; she needed to talk to someone.  Why hadn't he kissed her like this until now?  *_Why*?_

            She pushed all thoughts like that away and melted into his embrace.  Hungrily, she ate up his mouth, thrusting her tongue past his.  He welcomed her just as eagerly as she had welcomed him.  He had wanted to kiss her passionately for a long time, but wasn't sure if she was ready.  He moaned as her tongue swirled around his fangs, and he couldn't stop them from descending.  She egged him on, caressing them, running her tongue down and around their tips.  His jeans were growing increasingly tighter.  Her skillful tongue on his fangs and her warm body pressed against him excited him more and more.

            "Nat," he groaned, regretfully pushing her away slightly.

            She stared with a slightly hurt look on her face, into his amber eyes.  "What?"

            "Please stop."  His eyes begged for understanding, but there was none coming.

            "Why?"  Hurt and confusion laced her voice as she regarded him.  His eyes were slowly melting back to blue, ands he could tell that his fangs were gone.

            "I'm afraid that I'll hurt you," he admitted to her, praying for understating.  He knew that her bruises had not faded, and there were still open wounds on her body.  She still hurt, even if she wouldn't admit it.

            "Please Nick?" she begged him.  Why didn't he understand?  Even if he didn't find her desirable anymore, why couldn't he make love to her for her benefit?

            "One more day, Nat?" he pleaded with her.  "Just for my piece of mind?  Please?"  He cradled her chin in his hands, searching for understanding.  If his blood had helped her knees, it was likely that it had helped the rest of her body.  But he wanted to be absolutely sure.  If she put up any more arguments, however, he didn't know if he could resist her.

            She sighed and stepped back a step.  "Fine," she said resignedly.  "Whatever makes *_you_* happy.  Whatever makes *_you* feel good."_

            She stalked angrily down the stairs, and began picking up around the loft.  Not knowing what to do, Nick watched her silently from the catwalk.  Why was she mad at him?  He was only worried about her.  He walked slowly down the stairs, watching her closely.  She wasn't just angry.  There was something else in her stop, too.  It was hard to place.  Defeat?  Sorrow?  Remorse?  He could not put his finger on it, no matter how hard he tried.

            As soon as her back was to him, he crossed the floor, directly behind her and dropped his hands on her shoulders.  She flinched slightly in surprise.  He kissed a line up the side of her neck and nibbled slightly on her earlobe.

            "Why are you mad at me?" he breathed into her ear.

            "I'm not," was her immediate reply as she leaned back into his arms.

            The way she was slightly turned allowed Nick to see the single tear that trickled down her face.  "I'm sorry, Nat.  I just don't want to hurt you.  You can't tell me that your body doesn't still ache every day…"

            Natalie sighed and turned in his arms, allowing him to wrap her in a hug.  Nick never *_wanted* to do anything, but somehow, he always did.  The road to Hell was paved with Nick's good intentions.  She could fell the warm glow of his love spreading through her as he opened the link between them.  It was hard to be mad, to feel self-pity, when she could feel how much he loved her.  However, feeling loved did not equate to feeling attractive, something she did not even come close to feeling right now.  If Janette came back at this second, would Nick run right back to her?  She knew that relationships were built on more than just having a prefect body, but still…_

            "It's okay, Nick," she said.  There was nothing she could say to change his mind.  "You're just being overprotective, again."

            Nick tucked Natalie's head under his chin.  "How about we put up the tree and put on the lights and the angel at the top?"

            She knew he was trying to appease her.  But that did sound like a good thing to do, especially if he meant that *_she* would get to put the angel up top.  But they couldn't, not today._

            "We can't, Nick.  See how all the branches are pulled together and pointed up to the top?  It has to be untied and put up for a couple days before the branches will be down enough."

            Nick sighed.  "Then I'll put it up so we can put ornaments on it sooner.  Hold on a sec, and I'll go find my tree stand."

            Natalie sighed and began wiping down the kitchen counter as he went upstairs to look.  Her thoughts turned inward as she went about the mindlessly easy task.  She should have listened to Nick that morning.  He hadn't said anything out loud, but his eyes had asked her to stay home for one more day.  But she was being proud and stubborn.  She didn't take sick days unless she was dying, or Nick convinced her to.  Why hadn't she listened to the unspoken plea?  Was her kidnapping some sort of punishment from God?  What had she done to deserve that?  And now, Nick was punishing her for something beyond her control.

            Or had it been beyond her control?  There must have been *_something_* she could have done or said to appease Kane.  What had she done wrong?  Maybe if she hadn't run in the beginning, or if she hadn't mouthed off to him.  What could she have done?

            No.  She had to stop beating herself up over this.  There was *_nothing* she could have done, nothing.  Wasn't that what she had learned as a child, when her parents found out what Nana was doing to her?  Things couldn't have changed, now that she was an adult.  There was nothing she could have done._

            It was not her fault she was going to be scarred and ugly for life.

            She brushed away the few tears that had fallen down her face.  It was Christmastime, not time for thoughts like that.  It was a time for rejoicing that she was still alive.  Sydney twined around her ankles, meowing to be picked up.  She smiled, remembering how worried she had been that Nick and Sydney would not get along.  Luckily, her fears had been relatively unfounded, and once they had their territories settled, they were fine.  The cat didn't even try to scratch up Nick's piano, or the furniture.  He was content with the seemingly endless nooks and crannies to play in.

            After cuddling with her kitty for a few minutes, Natalie realized that Nick had been gone for a long time.  He said that he knew where the stand was.  Curious as to what he was doing, she went upstairs to the storage room.  The guest room was coming along fine, and she waved to the workers as she walked past.

            She came upon Nick holding something between his thumb and forefinger, admiring it in the light.  He was so absorbed, that he didn't notice her presence.  "What's that?" she asked, squinting as she tried to see what it was.

            "Nothing," Nick said hurriedly as he turned away.  He pocketed the object before she could see what it was.  What was he hiding from her now?  "I found my Nativity set, too.  Which one do you want to use?"

            He obviously was not going to talk about it anymore, so she considered his question carefully.  His was bound to be older, and more beautiful than hers, so that was the logical conclusion.

            "Yours, of course," she answered.  Plus, it was bound to be more special to him than hers was to her.

            "Could you carry this down, then?" he asked, handing her a green and red metal tree stand.  It was relatively plain, but had a deep hollow in it for water.  That was good - she would have to worry about checking the water level less.

            She looked it over as she walked down the stairs.  There were four giant screws, which she surmised would screw into the trunk and hold the tree in place.  It looked *_much_* more sturdy than the plastic ones typically seen in stores.  This was built to last.

            Mutual agreement said that the tree would go beside the piano, and Natalie put her stand there while Nick placed the box containing his Nativity on the kitchen table.

            It took them a good twenty minutes to get the tree to stay straight.  It just didn't want to stand tall, and Nick wasn't much help.  Natalie would tell him to lean it a little to the right, and he could go too far.  Then it was tipped too far back, or too far forward.  The worst part was, she wasn't being picky.  It tended to be grossly leaning, while Nick's arm was buried up to this shoulder in the branches.  Finally, she crawled under and quickly tightened the screws.  Nick let go when she came back out and stepped back, with Natalie quickly joining him.

            "We're pathetic," she said, laughing.

            "At least it's not noticeably leaning," Nick aid, hugging her.  "Hopefully, we'll get better with practice."

            Natalie snuggled happily in his arms.  "Do you want to take it down and try again?" she asked with a small grin.

            "*_No-o*," he said quickly.  "I like the way this is just fine."  He smiled, very proud of their accomplishments._

            Natalie wiggled a little in his arms, moving a little closer.  Never would she admit it, but the way his arm was around her shoulders hurt.  He was rubbing the cloth of her shirt against the welts on her back.  The blood he had given her had healed her knees, but only touched up the rest of her.  She tried not to twitch and move around, to just enjoy the closeness.  Too soon, Nick let go.

            "Do you want to set up the Nativity?" he asked, nuzzling her cheek.

            Mourning the loss of his arms, but excited by the prospect of seeing the no-doubt-antique figurines, she replied, "Of course."

            They sat down on opposite ends of the table, the box between them, and began to unwrap the exquisite figurines.

(A/N:  Yeah, so, I had to baby-sit this insane 7-year-old, and I'm wiped.  The kid locked my coat and my shoes in the bathroom, doesn't sit still, and doesn't shut up.  I much prefer the one-year-old and the newborn next door to him.  LOL.  Hm…apparently there's someone who dislikes Abel…hehe, too bad for her/him!  Anywho, I hope you enjoyed reading.  I have to go work on my VisualBASIC stuff, now…)


	9. Desicions

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 9/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.

**Chapter Nine**

(A/N:  Ugh.  Got into another argument with my mom today about religion.  *Sigh* She is so pig-headed!  Then again, so am I… R/R/E!)

            7:58 am.  Silent tears rolled down Abel's face as he lay, huddled on the couch.  He was deathly still, and looked to be sound asleep at first glance.  A closer inspection would reveal his open eyes and wet face.  A slight movement of his arm turned his wrist to check his watch.  8:00 am.

            Sleep was the enemy.  Sleep was a time for nightmares, a time for remembrance.  Sleep was a time when he could not forget.  He forestalled the cursed darkness for as long as he could, no matter how tired it made him in the 'morning'.

            The wakeful times were not necessarily his friend, either - there was too much time for thought.

            In the blackness of sleep, demons lay in wait for him.  With his eyes closed, he could not see potential pain coming for him, and that made him nervous.  In darkness, thought and memories could attack, and there was nothing to stop them.

            Every day, he searched through ads to find somewhere to live.  Although he made sure to appear to be diligently searching, he was truly filled with trepidation.  He would not know what to do if he had to live alone.  Among the SM crowd, he was what was known as a 'pet'.  A high-functioning pet, but a pet nonetheless.  He could not live on his own.  He needed someone there to remind him to pay bills, to tell him to go get groceries, to order him to do things in general.  He had done everything for Kane, but his brother had *_told* him when to do it, and basically set him on a schedule._

            He *_liked_* living with Nick and Natalie, at least, so far.  They did not hurt him.  

            He worked as hard as he could to make himself invisible, to keep from notice.  If he made himself unnoticeable, hopefully they would not kick him out as soon.  And, hopefully, they would not begin to use him as their plaything.  He knew that this new, idyllic lifestyle had to end soon, and it would end in one of those two ways.  The question was, which would he prefer?  They could not be as harsh as Kane had been…

            What would he do when they kicked him out?  Or when they started beating him?  He did not want to go back to that lifestyle again.  His biggest worry was his butterfingers.  He had already spilt his water; something that would have gotten him beat with Kane's belt before.  It was only a matter of time before he did something unforgivable.

            Nick was one of them, one of the fanged ones.  He had easily pieced the clues together.  Scars from two puncture wounds marked countless places on his body.  His brother had them over often, finding it humorous to see him writhing on the ground in pain from the things they did to him.  He had heard them talking one day after feeding off him, saying how the pain made his blood ever so more sweet.  And, even though Kane was locked up, it hadn't stopped.  Every night, after work…

            The tears flowed harder as his thoughts meandered their cruel way to his history, his past.  No matter how much he tried to redirect his treacherous thoughts, they kept returning.  He was still deathly silent and still.  He had much practice in crying silently, having been whipped, literally, every time he allowed tears to trickle down his face.

            His parents had been Christian zealots, taking their version of the Bible extremely seriously.  Parties, celebrations, happiness, were the work of the Devil.  Friends merely distracted from the teachings of the Lord.  They were old-school parents, firmly believing in the philosophy of 'spare the rod, spoil the child', and often put it to practice where he was concerned.

            Abel could never do anything right, whereas Kane was their Golden Child.  Even as a child, Kane had been cruel.  If Abel said something to their parents about what Kane was doing to him, he was called a liar and locked in his room, sometimes for days on end.  He had been told that crying was for girls, and someone would punish him.  He couldn't count the number of broken bones he had suffered from Kane's hands.  Even though drink was supposedly the work of Evil, his father would get drunk almost every night, and blame Abel for bringing out the Devil.  Then it would get ugly.

            All decisions were made for Abel.  He never had a say in anything.  He never learned *_how_* to make any kind of major decision.  If he was asked a question, and he gave the wrong answer, someone would beat the shit out of him.  Or if he asked for something, wanted something, he would be beat.  He hadn't really been here for long enough to know for sure, but Nick and Natalie seemed to actually *_want_* him to make decisions on his own, and accept what he decided.

            When Kane was eighteen, their parents died in a car crash.  Abel was put into his brother's custody.  Things descended into the pits of Hell from there.

            Abel would be passed around to Kane's friends, tortured, sometimes sodomized, and given to another one.  Kane made him work nights, and give up all the money.  Then he had to be awake all day to wait on Kane.  He had learned to survive on one or two hours of seep.  If Kane had a bad day, Abel would suffer for it.  If Kane was horny and there were no girls to be found, Abel would have to relieve him, and Kane was an *_extremely_* sadistic person.  If Kane did something illegal, the rap would fall on Abel.  If that ended Abel in jail, Kane would bail him out and beat him for wasting money.  And Kane had told him that if he ever told anyone, he would be found and would wish he were dead.  Kane had Abel completely terrified of him.

            Abel curled into a tiny ball, trying to slow his tears.  What had he done to deserve this?  And when would it start again?  He did not make enough money to afford food, rent, and bills.  There was nowhere he could go, except where he would be a pet again.  At some point, Nick and Natalie would stop pretending to be nice people, and start hurting him.  There was nowhere he could go, nothing he could do.  He just had to give in to his fate.

            His eyelids were growing heavy.  Sleep could be forestalled no longer.  Why couldn't he just forget?  Why couldn't he stay awake for a little longer?

~~~~{@

            Natalie eyes opened, and she was awake.  The question was, what had woken her up?

            Nick was still sound asleep.  Natalie sighed softly, looking at his angelic face.  They had hoped that Janette's cure would work, once Nick was able to control himself.  But, as luck would have it, Nick wasn't even becoming a *_little* mortal.  She could only assume that Robert had some kind of rare gene that allowed Janette to begin to cross over, and it was the stress of his death that caused the final crossing.  And, to be honest, he didn't seem all that interested in becoming mortal again._

            She heard the noise again, coming from downstairs.  It sounded like someone whimpering in pain.  She could easily tell that it was Abel.  He sounded so hurt, so terrified, so *_alone* that she had to go down and see what was the matter.  Glancing at the clock as she eased out of bed, she saw that it was only two in the afternoon._

            Once downstairs, she could see that Abel was on the couch, asleep.  Instead of sleeping soundly, he was twitching and whimpering, quite obviously having a nightmare.  Natalie remembered hearing somewhere that you weren't supposed to wake a person who was having a nightmare.  She didn't know about the person who first came up with that, but *_she_* would certainly prefer to be woken from any bad dream.  She moved to stand by the end of the couch.

            Abel seemed to sense her movement, and his eyes opened, glimmering in the soft light.  As soon as he saw her, he curled into a tight ball, trying to hide in the couch.

            "I'm sorry," he whimpered.  "I didn't mean to wake you up. I was trying to be quiet.  I'm sorry.  Please…" He trembled, curled up in a little ball, with his head buried in his knees.

            "Abel," she said gently.  He tensed, expecting a blow.  She crouched down by where he was curled, and he whimpered a little.  "Abel, sweetie, I'm not going to hurt you."

            Abel clung tighter to himself.  "Please," he begged, her words not registering.  "I'm sorry.  I promise…"

            "Abel, honey, look at me."  She waited patiently until he raised a tear-streaked face and dragged terrified eyes to meet hers.  "I'm not going to hurt you.  I'm not even going to touch you.  I just came down to make sure you were okay.  Do you want a glass of warm milk?"  His eyes questioned her uncertainly.  "You know, nuke some milk in the microwave?  It calms you down and helps you sleep?"

            "Yes please," he said tremulously.

            Natalie smiled reassuringly and pushed herself up by way of hands on her knees, wincing slightly as they twinged.  As she heated a glass of mile, she leaned against the edge of the counter.  She could see the back of Abel's head as he sat up and wiped the tears off his face.  The poor boy.  Perhaps she should have just stayed upstairs.  When the microwave beeped, she brought the warmed glass over to Abel and crouched down by the couch again as he hesitantly took it.

            "Better?" she asked as he slowly drained the glass.

            "Thank you," he said quietly when he was done.  He looked uncertain as to what to do with his glass now that it was empty.  He flinched as Natalie reached out and gently took the glass from his trembling hand and set it on the floor.

            "You look like you need a hug," she said, tactfully asking permission.

            He looked at her in surprise and nodded hesitantly, tearfully.  _When was the last time someone hugged him? Natalie wondered to herself as she wrapped her arms around him carefully, squeezing him gently.  Surprisingly, after a second, his arms wrapped around her.  He squeezed tightly, trembling.  She could feel him silently crying.  So, she rubbed his back and let him cry, even though she could feel her knees wanting to give out.  His shirt pulled back a little from his neck.  Natalie caught a glance of two puncture wounds on the back of his neck, where a shirt would always be sure to hide them.  They were still fresh and bruised, she'd guess they were only a day or two old._

            "Abel," she asked, fingering them gently, "how'd you get these?"

            He tensed up and froze, and she let him go.  To give relief to her knees, she moved and sat next to him on the couch.  He watched her with terrified eyes, quickly wiping the tears off his face.

            "They told me they'd make me wish I were dead if I told," he sobbed fearfully.  "I can't tell you."

            "That's okay, that's okay," she soother him.  "Suffice to say you weren't willing?"

            He shook his head, agreeing with her.  "They come and get me after work."  He shook on the couch, shudders running down his body, staring at the floor.

            "Abel, honey, did they try to make you forget?"  She touched his shoulder.  He flinched away, so she dropped her hand.

            He nodded miserably.  "Then they told me if I told… they're going to hurt me even worse, now," he sobbed.

            "No, they won't sweetie, I promise."  Natalie prayed that Nick would help her keep that promise.  "They won't touch you again unless you want them to."  He nodded, not believing her.  She was slowly falling asleep, sitting here.  "Get some sleep," she told him, standing up with his glass in hand.

            When she came back, he was lying down with a blanket loosely over him.  Tears glinted down his face, which he furtively brushed off.  Once more, Natalie crouched by the couch.

            "You okay?" she asked sympathetically.  "Do you want to talk for a little bit longer?"

            He shrugged, which Natalie interpreted as a yes.  She sat down on the floor, leaning against the front of the couch.  She sat quietly, waiting for Abel to speak, or for something to enter her brain.

            Abel was glad she stayed with him.  He wasn't sure which he was more afraid of - other people, or being alone.  Since he was glad she was there, it could only be the latter.  Hot tears rolled down his face.  Throughout his life, tears had only caused him pain.  So why couldn't he stop them?

            Natalie turned her head in time to see him wiping the fresh batch of tears off his face.  "Why are you crying?" she asked, not expecting an answer.

            Abel flinched as she spoke and fought not to curl up to protect himself.  She wasn't going to hurt him, she assured him of that.  But how many people had said the same?  Her actions had matched her words, though… She hadn't gotten mad when he spilled his water; she hadn't tried to hurt him when she hugged him.  But hadn't his mother had her good days, too?

            He bit the bullet, answering her question as more salty tears rolled down his face and dripped onto the couch.  "I don't want to leave," he whispered.

            "Who said you had to?" Natalie immediately asked.

            Abel weighed his choices fearfully.  Don't answer at all, lie, or answer and get in trouble for assuming.  Which would be worse?  Which would get him hurt less if she stopped acting nice?  "You're going to kick me out soon, aren't you?" he asked tearfully, shivering under his blankets.

            "Of course not," she quickly assured him.  "You can stay here for as long as you like.  Neither of us will make you leave, not ever."  She knew she was making a promise that, if Nick decided it, she couldn't keep.  But did she have any choice?

            He looked at her with teary eyes, eyes filled with disbelief.  His ice blue eyes glimmered with wetness.  Sure, that was what she said now, but what about later?  Things would change.  This good lick would not last.  Why was she being so nice to him?  What was up her sleeve?

            Natalie watched the slow tears trickling down his face.  "I don't know what to say to make you believe me, sweetie," she told him.  She wanted to run her hand through his hair, stroke his head.  That's what her mother used to do for her when she was crying, and it had always made her feel better.

            Abel miserably watched her, not meeting her eyes.  He must have been feeling suicidal because his mouth opened and he said, "I've got butterfingers.  One day I'm going to drop something or spill something or break something and you're going to kick me out or," he sobbed something unintelligible, but Natalie could guess what it was.

            "We won't do either, sweetie, I promise.  And the reason you're such a 'butterfingers' is because you're so nervous all of the time."  She unthinkingly reached out a hand to smooth back his short hair.  He flinched, and her hands stopped, hovering in the air.  Abel froze and regarded it with large, fearful eyes until it dropped back to her side.  The instant she had raised her hand, he stopped crying.  It only took Natalie a moment to figure out what it looked like to him.

            "Sorry," she apologized.  "Force of habit.  My mother used to run her hand through my hair when I was crying, and it always soothed me."  She shrugged, seeing the 'cornered rabbit' look fade slightly from his eyes.

            Abel watched her closely as she yawned, trying to see if she had been telling the truth.  He had been sure that she was going to slap him to stop his childish crying.  Was she telling the truth?  Why had she stopped, either way?  Could he trust her?  Or would she turn out to be just like everyone else in his life?  Could he trust Nick, one of the fanged ones?  His eyelids were growing heavy.  He wished he could stay awake longer, but it wasn't working.  Was this heralding the end of this pleasant new life?

            Natalie glanced at the clock on the wall as she yawned again.  "Honey, I've been down here for almost an hour, and I'm falling asleep as I sit here."  She stood up, stretching.  He was still shivering slightly so, although she doubted it was from the cold, she pulled up his blanket slightly, tucking him in.  Of course, he flinched.  "Sweet dreams," she said before going back up the stairs.  She could feel his eyes following her movements up the stairs until she shut the bedroom door behind her.

            Nick was, of course, wide-awake and waiting for her return.  "What would you do if I died?" she joked, immediately regretting it at the look that came over his face.  "I'm sorry Nick, that was unthinking of me."  She slid into bed and curled up against him.  His arms quickly pulled her close, staying firmly fixed around her stomach, holding her against him.

            "You handled that very well, downstairs," he murmured into her ear.

            "How long were you awake?" she asked, able to guess the answer.

            "Since you left the room, of course," he replied.

            "Good.  Do you have any objections to anything I promised?  I'm sorry I didn't talk to you first, but…"

            "I understand, love, and it's all the same things I would have guaranteed," he assured her.  Abel had quickly ceased to be that bastard's brother, but had become a lost child to be taken care of.  "Those bastards," he muttered.  To think that a group of vampires had been using the young man as some sick sipping glass…

            "What are you going to do?" Natalie asked quietly, knowing what he was talking about.

            "Talk to Lacroix and see if he knows anything, send out a community-wide warning that Abel's not to be touched, and perhaps post a guard for a while."

            "Lacroix doesn't seem too happy with you at the moment," she mused, recalling his visit to the loft.

            Nick snorted, which tickled the back of her neck.  "He's never too happy with me - I'm a constant disappointment to him.  But he still tends to help, if he feels it will somehow 'bring me back to the fold'.  Don't even suggest it."

            "I'm a big girl, Nick," she retorted.  "I can take care of myself."

            "You're mortal," he stated.

            Natalie wasn't going to get into a fight with him tonight, so she let it go.  "Nick…"

            He waited for a moment for her to continue, but she didn't.  "Yeah?" he prompted her.

            "I think…" This was hard to admit, hard to say.  She always pretended to be strong, pretended that nothing affected her.  And now, she had to admit that she had been lying to herself and everyone else about that.

            "You think what, love?" Nick questioned her after a moment, concerned because he had to drag it out of her.

            "I think… I need to talk to someone," she said quietly.  "Someone who's not you."  She worried that he was going to take offense to that.  And, she felt ashamed for needing help from someone, from a… therapist.

            He could tell from the set of her body what she was thinking.  "That's nothing to be ashamed of," he told her, nuzzling her neck.

            Natalie sighed and rolled over in his arms, so her forehead was against his chest.  "Yeah, I guess," she said.  After talking to Abel… dealing with him… she realized that she did need help, even though… Even though it put her in danger of losing the place on the pedestal Nick had her on.  But she could feel herself drawing away from people out of paranoia, which she wanted to halt, now that she knew she was doing it.

            "I love you, Nat," Nick murmured, kissing the top of her head.

            "Love you, too," she murmured.  Christ, was she exhausted.  She was already falling asleep.  "Make me go, Nick, don't let me chicken out."

            "I promise," he murmured, not sure if she heard him.  She was already fast asleep.

            He, on the other hand, could not fall asleep so easily, even with her securely in his arms.  His mind raced with worry for Natalie.  Finally, she had admitted that she *_wasn't* okay.  The question was, how not okay was she?_

            Her comment when she came back stung him, driving her unintended point home.  He had almost lost her, because of her mortality.  She could have died at the hands of that bastard.  Was that comment a subtle way of asking him to bring her across?  What if it wasn't?  What if she had changed her mind?  She was growing older.  If she wanted to be brought across, wouldn't she want it when she was still relatively young?

            What if by someone 'who's not you', she meant that she wanted to end what they had together?  She could be sick of having to put up with him and his baggage.  She had always been so patient with him, having a seemingly endless reservoir of it.  Had it finally reached rock bottom?  Oh, God, she couldn't want to leave him.  Was he too protective?  Not protective enough?  Did she blame him for not being there for her when she needed his protection?  Lord knows, he blamed himself enough for six or seven people.

            Nick growled softly, hugging Natalie closer to him.  He was thinking too much, being too paranoid.  Natalie murmured in her sleep, her hands tightening on the front of his shirt.  He had to go to sleep.  If he was going to talk to Lacroix tomorrow, he needed to be well rested and well fed.


	10. Hope For LaCroix

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 10a/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  The girl at the bar is mine.  Charles D. Simak owns Ring Around the Sun (which is a *_really_* good book).  The blonde vampire who comes to get the girl at the bar is not mine, but I refuse to tell you whom he is, because that wouldn't be any fun.  And the vampire at the bar that the girl is talking to is mine.  Jack is mine.

**Chapter Ten**

            Lacroix could sense his child entering the Raven.  He didn't kid himself - Nicholas wanted something.  No longer would he come for a mere social visit.  _No longer does he come here much at all, he thought to himself, waiting for Nicholas to join him at the bar._

            He was not disappointed.  The blonde crusader purposefully crossed the short distance to the bar, taking the seat next to Lacroix.  He tried to determine his maker's mood, but met with no success, as usual.  The ancient vampire was as unreadable as ever.  Lacroix handed Nick a goblet of blood, and leaned back against the bar.  He looked around the club with the air of a king overlooking his realm.

            "Nicholas."  That single word was often all it took to start his son talking.  The name came out, not as a greeting, but as a derogatory word.  Old habits die hard.

            Nick played the quiet game for a little longer.  He was either going to throw Lacroix off balance or make him angry.  The benefits were well worth the risks.  Unfortunately for him (but oh so predictable), Lacroix knew what he was doing, and refused to fall for it.

            Finally, Nick spoke.  "What do you know of Abel Belasarius?"

            Lacroix was silent for a long time, sizing up Nicholas.  How much did his son know?  What would be profitable to tell him?  Nicholas seemed to have taken on another mortal pet, so perhaps it would be better to tell the truth, and tell everything.  Not, of course, without having some fun first.

            "What do you want to know?  He is not part of the community."

            "I know that.  Cut the bullshit, Lacroix.  Can you just give me a straight answer for once?"

            _Because you would have been suspicious had I answered you straight, Lacroix thought, considering telling Nicholas that.  But that would no doubt have started a fight.  Although Lacroix enjoyed their battles, finding them invigorating, he would have to restrain himself due to his new strategy.  This was not a conversation to be had at the bar, anyway, due to the abundance of mortal around.  Nicholas' timing in discussing something to do with the community was, as usual, greatly lacking.  It was too early for the patrons to be mostly of the vampiric persuasion.  Did he suppose this would prevent a fight?_

            Lacroix stood with his bloodwine in hand.  "Come with me to the back room."  He strode off without waiting to see if Nicholas would follow him.

            Nick sighed and followed his Master.  He had doped that the presence of mortals would not only give him a straight answer, but also help avoid a fight.  The back room was never a good thing.  He had timed his visit to be before the Nightcrawler monologue, hoping to avoid the back room.

            "What do you know about Abel Belasarius?" Nick asked again.  Although Lacroix sat, Nick chose to stand.  Natalie's speech to him came back (*_"You're just like a teenage son with his father."_*), making him wonder if his refusal to sit down was an act of rebellion.  Was he doing this just to piss Lacroix off?

            "I suppose you are here filled with righteous indignation over the depravity of vampires?" Lacroix began, slightly sarcastically.  "Abel Belasarius, a resistor.  Younger brother of Kane Belasarius, also a resistor.  They were granted temporary immunity from the Enforcers, for reasons unknown."

            "I think I've figured that all out already, Lacroix," Nick interrupted.  "Tell me something I don't know."

            "Well, Nicholas, I can't read your mind.  I'm trying to make sure to cover everything you might want to know."  And he was baiting Nicholas, of course.  Killing with kindness, so to speak.

            "Yes, you *_can_* read my mind, because *_you* never taught me how to shut our link."  Wait, this was the baiting Natalie was talking about.  Good Lord, she was right.  Not that he was going to say that to Lacroix._

            The General fought back a sigh brought on by his recalcitrant son.  "No, he is not lying or mistaken.  There is a small group of vampires who find that blood tastes better if it's laced with pain, much similar to Francesca.  Kane generously allowed them to borrow his brother to sip from him."  He could see the question in Nick's eyes.  "Yes, I went once to make sure he wasn't a threat to the community.  Not exactly my… cup of tea, so to speak."

            "I'm surprised," Nick broke in sarcastically.  "I would think you would be right up there at the front of the line."

            "There is a difference," Lacroix said venomously, his eyes flashing in anger, "between disciplining a child and gratuitous torture.  Just because *_you* fail to see the difference does not mean there is none.  Just because this is *__my* community, does not mean that I have the right to dictate how individuals behave, as long as their behavior does not adversely affect the community."_

            There was a long silence, each mulling over his own thoughts.

            There were few things in all the ages that LaCroix found truly evil.  Contrary to what most thought, there were things he would not do, things that made him sick to his stomach.  Not things that disgusted him - many things about mortals and vampires did that - but things that truly made him sick.  One of those things was rape.  A woman did have the right to say no.  The other thing was senseless torture.  If it was for information, or the victim was willing, that was different.  But if it was a poor, defenseless, weak mortal like that boy…that was cruel and depraved.  Not that LaCroix would ever admit that.

            Everyone knew he didn't have a heart.

            Nick surreptitiously watched his…father.  This change in LaCroix was scary to say the least.  This was a sign of the coming of the end of the world, he was sure.  The apocalypse of the ordered world he had was drawing nigh.  White was black, black was white, right was wrong, and wrong was right.

            "I suppose you want me to make it known throughout the community that he is now off limits," LaCroix said wearily, breaking the suffocating silence.

            Nick nodded warily, cautious because of LaCroix's seeming agreeability.  What did he want for payment?  LaCroix never did anything for free.

            "You do realize that they will not be happy about this, and will most likely attempt to make you see the error of your ways."  _Even if it is pure foolishness, _ LaCroix added silently.

            "Why do you care?  I'm nothing but a disappointment to you anyway," Nick said bitterly.  Until he voiced that, he never realized how much it hurt that LaCroix could not accept him as he was.  How, even when he embraced 'his nature', he could not seem to please the ancient vampire.  Every thought of his was proving Natalie's insights correct.

            "Disappointed me many times, yes.  But there's a difference between that and *_being_* a disappointment."  LaCroix wasn't sure what to say without seeming too… humane.  Luckily, he was saved from having to add more by the clock.  "It's time for the Nightcrawler's monologue," he informed Nick.  "I have to go."

            Nick turned back at the door.  "But you'll spread the word?"

            "Yes, Nicholas, I will," LaCroix said exasperatedly.  "How long are you going to continue this foolishness?"

            "Into eternity," Nick shot back as he left.

            LaCroix sighed once he was sure Nick was out of hearing range.  He had actually put a prerecorded tape in, but speaking to Nicholas had given him an idea for a broadcast.  Of course, the main reason was that it meant Nick had to leave.  There were days when he greatly enjoyed beating the crap out of his wayward son.  But tonight wasn't one of them.

            Once he was in the soundproofed room, he slid into the swivel chair in front of the microphone.  When the song ended - a morose violin piece - he pressed 'Stop' on the tape player and turn on the mic.  Without preamble, he began.

            "The difference between right and wrong.  Is it a thin line or a fat band of gray?

            "Who dictates what is right and what is wrong?  Is it not just a matter of popular opinion?  Whatever the general public says, goes.  Personal opinions are of no consequence if they go opposite the majority.

            "How does that make you feel, my brethren of the night, to know that if you do not go along with the majority, no one cares.  If you are not one of the lemmings, running for the cliff, then you are considered incompetent, or an anarchist.

            "But what, good listeners, happens when opinions change?  Up until the mid-1800s, slavery was considered 'right' in the States.  It was considered moral.  And then, almost overnight, opinions changed and it became 'wrong'.  Imagine how the good people of the States felt.  What they had known as right and natural their whole life was suddenly wrong.  Single people, single lemmings, are often given credit with changing the public opinion.  They are give credit for deciding what is right and what is wrong.  Single people do not change public opinion.  *_Good speakers* change public opinion, often insane ones.  It takes a good speaker to change wrong to right, or right to wrong.  You are all familiar with Adolf Hitler, I presume._

            "A finer talked, there never was.  He easily convinced the masses that it was okay to kill millions of people to help purify the human race.  To most of the rest of the world, he was considered wrong.  But to him and his people, he was right.  Who decides what is right and what is wrong?  Some detached god in the sky?  Or the people who it affects?

            "To the deserter, he is right.  He is saving his own hide.  But the people he deserts, to others on the side he deserts, he is wrong.  Who decided that personal gain is all right as long as it only hurts people no one cares about, but immediately becomes wrong once it hurts a good little lemming?

            "What is it like, my faithful listeners, to know that you are nothing but a lemming, running mindlessly for the cliff?  You do whatever everyone else does, you do as you are told.  Free will is nothing but an illusion, as is right and wrong.  It is an arbitrary decision.  All is an arbitrary decision, put into the hands of fools.

            "How do you feel about that, denizens of the night?  Call and tell me your fears, your worries.  The Nightcrawler will listen."

            He switched off the mic, talking aloud to himself.  "He'll listen, but he won't care."

~~~~{@

            LaCroix turned off all of the equipment in his private sound booth and left the small space.  It was still early enough that the club would be filled, but now the clientele would be mostly vampires.  The small group that needed to be informed of Nicholas' new foolishness might be out there, sipping on bloodwine before going out for a little sport.  He did not think Nick understood how angry this foursome was going to be when their toy was taken away.

            As he entered the loud club, his sharp ears were immediately struck by the sound of a *_very_* mortal heartbeat, one he did not recognize.  He quickly located the owner of the heartbeat sitting at the bar, arguing with Miklos.  LaCroix stood within hearing range, looking over the mortal.  She was a young, overweight girl with shoulder-length curly brown hair.  Her heart was much healthier than it should have been, looking at her.  The younger vampires were eyeing her as a potential meal, but she seemed oblivious to that.

            "But why not?" she asked exasperatedly.

            LaCroix could tell that Miklos was getting annoyed, and wondered how long the girl had been in here.  After 'mortal hours', any mortal, no matter what age, who wandered into the club was allowed in as fair game for a meal.  That explained why she was in there.  But if she was a pain in the ass, why had Miklos not thrown her out?

            "Because it's illegal," the bartender answered patiently.

            "So, you're telling me that if someone brought across a child, you won't serve them bloodwine until they're twenty-one?  Or whatever the legal age is here?"

            LaCroix blinked.  She knew of the community.  Interesting.  Perhaps this was the child Vachon and Tracy had spoken of.

            "That's different," Miklos replied.  "The law makes no reference to vampires."

            "But it makes no reference to not making reference to vampires.  Evidence by there being no evidence.  All I'm asking for is a Wild Turkey.  Is that not at all possible?"

            Miklos shook his head silently, and the girl sighed melodramatically.

            "Fine.  Can I have a Shirley Temple?"  Within seconds, Miklos set one in front of her.  "Can I get a shot of vodka in it?"

            "Not a chance," Miklos said, glancing at LaCroix.

            "D'Arvitt.  All I want is a bit of frellin' alcohol," she grumbled.  She turned to the young vampire next to her, sipping on her drink.  "Yeah, so, anyways.  Theoretically, time travel is possible, as is changing the past."

            LaCroix's ears perked up at this.  Seeing Nick with Natalie painfully reminded him of what he could have had with Fleur.  He could threaten Nick all he wanted, but, in truth, he could not put his son through the torture he went through, missing her.  He knew this child was talking nonsense, but still…

            "Take Einstein's Theory of Relativity, for example.  Basically, he said that the faster you are traveling, the slower time goes for you.  Once you reach the speed of light, time stops altogether."

            "But didn't Einstein also say that it was therefore impossible to reach the speed of light?" the vampire interrupted.  She was a pretty little thing, who looked to have actual brains in her head.

            "Sure, but how many things once considered impossible have happened?  The trick is to find a way to create enough propulsion to make a craft go *_faster_* than the speed of light.  That will start time running backwards.  So, yes, as of now, that is impossible because mortals and immortal alike are so frellin' stupid.  Someday, though… that kind of time travel will be possible."

            "But that would mean time travel *_is_* impossible, at least for now."

            "No, just that particular method is.  However, there is another way.  Have you ever heard of string theory?"

            The young vampire shook her head.  LaCroix, too, shook his head slightly.  He had the funniest feeling that the girl, even though she could not know of his presence, was speaking to him. That was utter foolishness, of course.  The feeling, however, was reinforced when she turned her head and unerringly met his eyes.  After less than half a second, she turned back to her conversation.

            "All right.  String Theory.  I'm pretty sure that's what they call this theory, but I might be wrong.  What it is is that there are an infinite number of worlds in parallel dimensions.  There's a world for every single choice ever made."

            "Like… there's a man driving a car who comes to an intersection.  In World A he continues on straight, in World B he goes to the right, in World C he goes to the left, in World D he turns around and goes home because he realizes he left the oven on."

            "And in World E, his car breaks down.  Exactly!  So, it is quite possible to move from this world to one of the parallel ones.  In doing so, you can choose when and where you want to land.  It's merely a matter of finding the rope to pull so the trapdoor opens."

            "Sort of like Ring Around the Sun."

            "Sort of, but not really.  That's a whole different kind of time travel."

            LaCroix saw a blonde vampire enter the Raven.  He did not…feel right.  His silver eyes immediately sought out the mortal.  Taking a roundabout route, he came to stand a couple feet behind her, staying out of sight.

            "And so, that is that version."  Her voice changed slightly, obviously aimed at the vampire behind her.  "If you're going to try and sneak up on me, don't do it while there are people around who will give you away with their eyes.  You win this round."  She spoke to the young vampire again.  "It was really nice talking to you.  It's refreshing to find someone with a brain in their head."

            "So wait!" the young female vampire exclaimed.  "You know how to open the door?"

            "That depends," the girl shot back over her shoulder as she walked out with the blonde vampire.

            LaCroix quickly followed them out, keeping within listening distance.  He wanted to know where this girl lived, in case she wasn't just talking bullshit.  And he didn't recognize the vampire she was with as part of the community.

            "New rule, little one," he heard the vampire say.  "No going somewhere that puts you in danger."

            "New rule," she retorted.  "Any rules made within the last five minutes don't count."

            "Which cancels yours."

            "Which puts it back in effect because it doesn't exist therefore it can."

            "Which cancels it again."

            "And so on and so on, and infinitum.  So from the stress, the rulebook explodes, so there are no rules."

            "Humor me, M'ija.  Nowhere that puts you in danger."

            "It's more likely that I would have staked anyone who decided to act on the hungry stares they were all giving me."

            Ah, so she wasn't totally oblivious.  Extremely cocky, though.  LaCroix rounded the corner, intent on catching up and questioning the child, giving in to rarely felt impatience.  He could see them ahead of him, walking along, the vampire's arm around the teen's waits.  Then, they literally disappeared into thin air.  He raced to the spot, searching fort hem.  It was impossible, but they were gone.

            Nicholas had his ridiculous quest for mortality.  LaCroix had his futile quest to regain Fleur.

~~~~{@

            Abel glanced nervously at the clock behind the counter.  Two of two.  He had two more minutes of relative safety.  Then, he had to go out, and they would be there, waiting for them.  Natalie had promised to take car of it, but she wouldn't.  There was nothing in it for her.  One more minute left.

            The door jangled open and shut.  Abel's head jerked up, but it was only Jack.

            "Hey Abe, how's it been?" the jovial man asked.  He was the son of the owner.

            "Slow night," Abel replied evenly.  Thirty seconds.

            "Aren't they all?  I don't get why Da keeps the place open all night.  Must be because he can get us two to work it for cheap."

            Abel smiled slightly.  "Sure."

            "Anyways, I'll see you tomorrow night.  Same time, same place, right?"  He grinned widely.

            "Yeah.  G'night."

            "See ya later, Abe."

            Abel forced himself to walk over and open the door.  There was nothing he could do about his lot in life.  Why bother trying to change it?  He was on his own as always.  He could even hear them talking, cruel laughter filling the air.

            "Knight thinks he can stop us…"

            "Why does he bother with mortals?  We are *_superior* to them - we have the right to do what we want with them."_

            "Hell, yeah.  We're the butchers, and they the cattle."

            "Everyone knows he wants to *_be_* one of them again.  Is the pathetic thing still drinking steer?"

            "No, I heard he switched back to human."

            "So, what are we going to do with the little shit since he obviously told Knight?"

            "D'unno know, yet.

            "But it's gonna be good.  He'll wish he were dead."

            There was a burst of malicious laughter, then they caught sight of Abel.

            "What?" one of them said caustically.  "You thought that pathetic weakling of a vampire could help you?  Get over here, b-" He was suddenly slammed against the wall by an arm attached to the body of Lucien LaCroix.

            "Do not speak to my son like that," he said viciously.  "Even on steer, he could beat you to a bloody pulp if he so desired."

            "He still does not have the right to dictate what we do," one of them said defiantly, foolishly.

            LaCroix dropped the one he was holding up against the wall and turned on that one.  "He has the right to put a mortal under his protection.  Which means he is also under mine."  His eyes spit fire at the four young vampires.  "If you touch the boy again, you will answer to me."  He paused for a long moment, waiting.  They just watched him, silently.  When had he lost the respect of the community?  Young vampires these days were too cocky, too arrogant.  "I suggest you leave," he warned the quartet ominously.

            It seemed as if that was all they had been waiting for - permission.  They were gone in a flash, speeding out of there as fast as they could.  LaCroix turned and regarded Abel silently.  They boy was cowering in the shadows, the ripe stench of fear rolling off of him.

            "Go home, boy, and be glad Nicholas is a fool."  LaCroix disappeared into the night.

            Abel slid slowly down the wall to sit on the dirty pavement.  She had actually done it for him.  It had stopped for now, but how long would it last?  And if Nick was a vampire, did that mean he just wanted him for himself?  Perhaps he didn't want to share.  But it would be better to be used by one than by four or five.

            Home.  For once, home had a relatively nice ring to it.  It did not bring immediate connotations of fear and pain.  They were going to make him leave, probably soon.  But for now, it was… home.

~~~~{@

            "So, it's not all that bad, so far," Natalie concluded.  "We're just 'getting to know each other'."

            "Irina's always been the best," Nick said, nuzzling her cheek as they sat in front of the fire.  She had asked him to find someone as soon as possible, before she changed her mind.  When given the choice between mortal or vampire, she had surprisingly chosen a member of the community.  So, he had called up Irina, a spry Russian he had met during the cold war.  She had even managed to fit Natalie in tonight as a special favor to him.  He was glad she had moved to Toronto in the recent past, and contacted him to tell him of her whereabouts.

            Nick nuzzled her neck again, kissing the big vein there.  The scent of the cinnamon-blood flowing through her veins was intoxicating to him.  Natalie murmured and turned her head, meeting his questing lips with her own.  Unabashedly, she caressed his fangs until they dropped.

            Nick pulled away, and she stifled a whimper of disappointment.  He rubbed his cheek against hers, whispering into her ear.

            "Forgive me for my utter lack of romance, love, but I have deprived myself of you for *_far* too long.  If that's okay."_

            "Bring it on, Crusader knight," she whispered huskily.  "Don't you dare stop there."  She agreeably allowed him to carry her up the stairs to their bedroom, kissing and licking the big vein on his neck - erogenous zone number two on a vampire.

~~~~{@

            "Oh God, Nat, I'm sorry," he murmured, hugging her sweat-slicked body close to him.  "The road to Hell is paved with my good intentions," he said miserably.

            Natalie turned her head ad kissed his neck.  "I love you, Nick.  It's okay.  You did what you thought was best."

            He drew out of her regretfully.  "I'm sorry," he repeated, cuddling her closer to him.

            "Well, you've been forgiven, so don't start feeling guilty about that."  Natalie rolled off of him, but still snuggled into his side, resting her head on his shoulder as she wiped the tears off her face.

            Nick kissed her temple, marveling once more over how well they fit together, in every way.  He could not believe his luck in finding her, in finally not repeating history.  Too soon, far too soon, he heard the lift starting up, meaning Abel was back.

            Natalie tilted her head up slightly and kissed him lightly.  "I'm getting into the shower," she said.  "Love you."

            "I love you too," Nick replied, watching her tight butt as she sashayed into the attached bathroom.  That was almost enough to get him excited again.

            Instead, he got up and put his clothes back on.  He considered going and joining her in the shower.  That would be nice… but not today.  He may have endless recuperative abilities, but she did not.  So, he made his way downstairs.  Abel was putting his key in his suitcase, which still leaned by the couch.  Nick was struck by how neat and compact everything was.  One could barely tell that anyone was living on the couch.  His blankets were folded neatly on one end, his pillow on top.  Everything he owned was in his suitcase, nothing was out lying around anywhere.  It was kind of scary.

            Abel looked up when Nick reached the bottom of the stairs.  "Thank you," he said quietly, the simple words backed by every fiber of his being.

            Nick smiled, glad his Master had acted on his wishes.  "You're welcome," he replied.  Perhaps he should take advantage of LaCroix's newfound generosity.  If only he could think of a way…

(A/N:  The Playstation faerie visited me room!  The Playstation faerie visited me room!  I go in to get my clipboard so I can work on this while watching 'Farscape', and there was a Playstation on my bed!  Yay!)

(P/A/N:  If you want the unedited version, email me at Mystra1215@hotmail.com and I'll email to you, okee?)


	11. She's Back

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 11/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  

**Chapter Eleven**

            Natalie giggled as she watched Nick trying to untangle lights for their Christmas tree.  It had finally spread out to what she deemed its fullest extent.  They (being her, Nick, and Abel) had wrapped all of *_her* lights around, starting at the bottom.  Unfortunately for Nick, they only reached halfway up.  His lights were still needed._

            Now, she and Abel leaned over the back of the couch, watching Nick on the floor.  She poked Abel lightly in the shoulder.  He only flinched a little.

            "Watch," she pointed.  "He's going to break another one."

            True to her word, they heard another tinkle and a curse from Nick.  Natalie laughed, and caught a tiny, almost silent giggle coming from Abel.  Nick tried to ignore them.  They were almost untangled (the lights, that is).  Natalie had bet him that he wasn't going to be able to untangle the massive knot, and he was bound and determined to prove her wrong.  She and Abel had been watching him for most of the evening.

            "Don't you guys have something to do?" he asked.  "Specifically, away from here?"

            Abel glanced at Natalie to see what to do.  He had somewhat attached himself to her.  As she put to Nick, "He's looking for a mother.  He may be twenty-one physically, but he's younger emotionally.  I must have done something right."

            Natalie did nothing but laugh again, so Abel stayed put.  Nick growled and cursed through another knot.  Never again would he just dump *_anything* into a box._

            "Explain to me again why you won't help?" he asked Natalie through gritted teeth.  The broken ones were going to be hell to get out of the sockets.

            "Because.  Not only is it a painless way to teach you that your actions have consequences, but it's hilarious."

            Nick growled something under his breath, fighting not to smile.  One more devilish tangle and it would be done.  Then he just had to replace all of the bulbs he had managed to break.  He glanced up at the two heads leaning over the back of the couch, one pair of eyes sparkling with mischief, the other slightly fearful but mischief buried deep in there.  He could see in Natalie's eyes the consideration that maybe she *_should* help him, but then mischief overwhelmed her again.  Thank God he was almost done._

            "Ha ha!" he crowed, standing up.  "I did it!  Looks like we *_don't* need more."_

            "You assume I have replacement bulbs.  I know you don't, I already looked."  Natalie smiled smugly.

            "But we don't need new lights!" he told her in a smug tone to match her smile.

            Abel felt a small smile on his lips as he watched their playful banter.  How different they were from his parents.  They looked so loving, like they actually loved each other.  It had to be a show, though.  Probably the way he was always cleaned up nice and pretty and his parents miraculously didn't fight when someone came over their house.  Either not everyone was like his family, or they were pretending for him.  But either way…

            Natalie laughed as she went around the couch to find her extra bulbs.  As she dug through a box, she shook her head in amusement.  "You're the only guy I know who would actually sit there and untangle all of those."

            Nick grinned boyishly.  "What can I say?  I like rising to a challenge."

            Natalie tossed him a pack of bulbs.  They each started on an end and worked towards the middle.  Nick's fingers were getting cut up, but Natalie expertly managed to unscrew the jagged-edged tops without once getting drawing blood.  Abel watched them, trying to figure out how to ask if he could help.  It wasn't that unscrewing shattered bulbs and putting new ones in looked particularly fun.  But being part of 'putting up the holidays'… It made him feel like he belonged somewhere.  He was part of something fun and unpainful.  He watched with yearning eyes as they wrapped the lights around, Nick reaching up as high as he could get to put them around the top.

            Natalie had Nick plug the lights in once they were finished.  Then they ooed and aahed over the pretty colors for a few minutes.  Nick stood behind her, his arms around her waist.  She giggled a little as he nuzzled her neck, whispering into her ear, "*_Our* Christmas tree."_

            She murmured back to him, "Not until it's got ornaments on it."

            He stepped away, moving to find the boxes they had put aside.  "Then let's not wait."

            Natalie turned to Abel, who was still leaned across the back of the couch.  She could see the masked yearning in his eyes.  "Are you going to help?"

            He nodded, quickly coming around the edge of the couch.  Natalie smiled at the eagerness he tried to hide.  He hadn't magically become unskittish, but whatever she had said to him that night had earned her a slight more degree of trust.

            "You know, you can ask if you want to join us," she told him.

            His lips twitched slightly.  "I know," he said quietly.  Sure, he knew.  But he would never dare.  Play it safe, the way he always did.

            Nick came over with a pile of boxes, putting them on the floor.  Natalie saw the sudden uncertainty on Abel's face.  She opened a box of simple balls, taking one out for herself and handing one to Abel.

            "There's no such thing as too many ornaments on a tree," she told him with a devilish grin.  "Just don't put glass near the bottom because Sydney likes to take off anything hanging and play with it."

            Nick laughed at that.  "You've got to be kidding."

            "Nope."  Natalie shook her head.  "Wait and watch."

            They filled the air with light, happy chatter.  Attempts were made to include Abel, and some of them actually worked.  Nick smiled, as he watched Natalie and Abel, slightly detached from the goings on.  She had the young man laughing slightly at something.  A happy look had filled her face as the three of them worked together.  He supposed that he had the same happy air about him.  He and Natalie *_lived* together.  They were spending Christmas together.  They were a family._

            Finally, they both had a family to spend the holidays with.

            Abel, thrown into the mix, was just another extra element.  Not a bad one, either.  Watching Abel drew a connection to Kane, which reminded Nick that the trial was going to begin soon.  Natalie would have to testify.  And Abel could be considered a character witness.  Nick didn't know if either of them would be able to go through with it.  One day, something was going to happen to Natalie, and she wasn't going to snap back the way she always did.  So many bad things had happened to her in her short mortal life…

            Nick's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of tinkling glass and a sharp indrawn breath.  Abe had started getting into putting on ornaments, and stopped being super-duper careful.  One of the cheap glass balls had slipped out of his hands and smashed to pieces on the floor.  A look of sheer terror filled his face.  His mouth gaped open and shut like a suffocating fish.  If it hadn't been so sad, it would be hilarious.

            Natalie's response was immediate and soothing.  "Take a breath, hon.  These things come a dime a dozen."  She handed him another.

            Abel took a deep shuddering breath and regarded the round object in his hands.  "I probably shouldn't," he dared to say softly.

            "Nonsense," Nick said as he came back with the vacuum cleaner.  He had to get up the broken shards from the lights, too.  "One down, two to go - everyone always ends up breaking something."

            Natalie was grateful for Nick's input, which seemed to calm Abel down.  Then she realized what the vampire was doing.  "Nick, love, the big shards are going to cut up the bag.  You need to get them up with a wet paper towel, first."

            "Oh," was his inane comment as he went and ran a handful of paper towels under the faucet.

            Natalie rolled her eyes at Abel, smirking slightly.  Nick came back, handing Abel a wad of paper towels.

            "Can you get that?" he asked, pointing to the shattered ball.

            Eager like a puppy to please, Abel put down the ball in his hand and carefully scooped up the broken glass.  He obviously had practice.  Quickly, he walked over and threw away the wet towel.

            "Thanks," Nick said as they passed each other.  True to his character, Abel flinched when he spoke, then looked relieved when that was all that was said.

            "*_Now* you can vacuum," Natalie said, laughing._

            Nick grabbed her and nuzzled her cheek, nibbling on her ear.  She giggled happily.  She hadn't felt this happy since… since never.  It had been too long; they had waited almost too long to finally admit their love.  She was so deliriously happy right now, that she could not imagine surviving life without Nick.

            The three of them finished decorating the tree, once Nick vacuumed up the rest of the glass.  It was one more happy memory to add.  Nick flicked off the lights and turned on the tree.  He came back to stand with Natalie and Abel, draping his arms around Natalie.  He rocked gently back and forth, resting his chin on her shoulder.  Abel stood slightly apart, not part of the group.  Natalie surreptitiously moved her and Nick closer to him, not quite close enough for their shoulders to brush, but close enough to feel body heat.  He glanced at them, considering moving slightly away when he saw how close they were.  But something inside of him, some deep-hidden and secret desire, made him stay where he was.

            "So this is Christmas…" Natalie murmured softly.

~~~~{@

            Nick kissed Natalie goodbye, standing in the door to the lift.  "Are you going to be okay?" he murmured.

            "Mm," she said, hugging him.  "Of course.  I'm a big girl."

            Nick hugged her tightly, burying his face in her hair.  Today, he had to go back to the precinct.  Back to work.  He did not want to leave Natalie alone, though.  Not only for her peace of mind, but for his, too.  He finally tore himself away from her warm arms.

            "Go, Nick," Natalie said, pushing him into the lift lightly.  "I'll be fine, you worry too much."

            He kissed her once more, nuzzling her cheek.  "I know.  I just can't help it.  What would I do without my light?"

            "Find a candle," she said with a smile as she stepped back and allowed the door to close.  "See you when you get home.  Love you."

            "Love you too, Nat," Nick replied as the door closed.

            Natalie closed her eyes as she listened to the lift grumbling down the shaft.  Once she was sure Nick was gone and wasn't coming back, she turned and went to the couch, curling up on it.  She was totally and completely alone in the loft.  Abel was at work, Nick was at work, and the guestroom had been finished, so the workmen were gone.  Abel had moved everything of his up there last night, so there was nothing on the couch for her to move.

            She already had a line of comedies picked out.  Given her druthers, Nick would still be home.  As contrary as it was, and as much as her independent nature fought it, she felt safer when Nick was home.  But what could she do?  He had to go to work, and she would never admit how much she relied on him.

            She sighed and tried to quell the anxiety rising within her, starting the first movie.

~~~~{@

            Nick smiled happily as he rode up in the lift.  Finally, he was home.  According to Tracy, he had been "utterly and totally useless" and should "get his pale butt back home to Natalie where he really wanted to be".  Of course, he stayed the whole shift, doing paperwork.  It was a slow night, thank God.

            "Hey Nat," he said as the door rolled shut behind him.  "How's your day been?"

            "Boring," she said, clicking off the television.  Immediately, she got up and walked over to him, hugging him tightly.

            Nick could see how tightly her nerves were strung from the way she was walking.  He hugged her tightly, burying his face in her wild mane of chestnut curls.

            "Mm, I missed you today," he murmured into her hair.

            She sighed happily, resting her cheek on his chest.  "Missed you, too."

            They stood like that for a long while.  Nick waited until he was sure she was sufficiently soother, feeling safe again, before letting go.  Feelings of guilt welled up within him.  He should stay home for another couple days.  She wasn't ready to stay home alone, and… and he was not ready to leave her anywhere alone.

            "Is Abel home yet?" Nick asked her, nuzzling her cheek.

            "Yeah, he's up in the guest room doing… whatever."

            Nick listened closely, and could hear the young man's heartbeat.  He could also hear the sounds of his deep, sobbing breaths.  If he had not been able to sense a vampire approaching, one he recognized but could not place, he would have ignored Abel and continued cuddling with Natalie.  At least for another couple seconds.

            Instead, he said, "Love, maybe you should go check on him."

            Natalie thought that a little strange, but kissed his scratchy cheek and complied.  "Sure, Nick."

            As she went up the stairs, she heard the lift starting up.  It made sense now; Nick was getting rid of her because a vampire he did not recognize was coming up.  Still, she went down the hall to listen outside of Abel's door.  Nick could have just told her to go upstairs, but he didn't.  There was always that possibility that there was a reason.  From the sounds within, Nick had sent her upstairs for a dual reason.  Abel was softly sobbing in his room.

            She knocked softly on his door.  "You okay, Abel?"

            There was an abrupt silence, and she knew he was trying to gain control of his voice.  How many times had she done the same?  Finally, he said evenly, "Yeah, I'm fine."

            "Can I come in, honey?"  The lift was still running.  She could feel Nick's confusion as he puzzled over how was coming up in the lift.  This link thing could come in pretty handy sometimes.

            "Sure," he said immediately.  She should have known he would not say no.

            She came in and eased the door shut behind her.  Abel was sitting on the edge of his bed, with red-rimmed eyes and tearstains down his cheeks.  She sat down on the chair put randomly in the middle of the room.  Right now, he had a chair and a mattress.  On Nick's first day off that coincided with Abel's the three of them were going to go buy furniture.

            "Are you okay sweetie?" Natalie asked him gently.

            He nodded slightly.  As usual when he was lying through his teeth, he stared at the floor directly in front of him.  She would have said something else, but a sudden well of elation, relief, and love came from Nick.

            "What the…" she murmured, standing up.  Technically, she should stay here and find out what was wrong.  But the rush of feelings through her and Nick's link was just too disturbing for her not to at least take a peak.  "You don't look okay," she told Abel was she walked past him to the door.

            She went out on the catwalk just in time to see Nick lean forward and kiss Janette.

(A/N:  Ba da dum.  The reintroduction of Janette.  Is she going to wreak havoc with Nick and Natalie?  Is she just here to kill Nick for bringing her back across?  Or is she mortal again…  And what was wrong with Abel?  All these questions…but are there answers?)


	12. Making Peace

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 12/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  Wait, no, I forgot in last time's, Janette isn't mine.  Or have I already said that somewhere?

**Chapter Twelve**

            Nick heard Natalie come out onto the catwalk just as he leaned forward and kissed Janette.  It was pure habit that made him do it.  He could not believe that Janette was back in Toronto.  His sister/child was still furious with him, so he could only assume that she was here for closure.

            He could hear Natalie's heart speeding up slightly and feel her jealously.  Why did he *_always* do that wrong thing?  "Nat…"_

            Natalie could see the happiness in Nick's eyes.  She had been dreading the day Janette showed up again, knowing it had to happen at some point.  There was no way she could compete with Janette before, even less now.  And given the history…she was going to lose Nick to her.

            She went down the stairs to Nick's side.  He silently apologized to her as he put his arm around her waist, hugging her to him.  Happily, he nuzzled her cheek and kissed her.

            "So, she finally knocked some sense into your thick skull, Nicolas," Janette said.  She flipped her long, curly black hair over her shoulder.  Sex appeal oozed from every pore on the vampire's body.

            Nick shrugged.  "Yeah, she did."  He squeezed Natalie slightly, a one-armed hug.

            "I need somewhere to stay for the day," Janette told him blatantly.

            "Yeah, sure, you can sleep on the couch."  He could not say no to her.  The sun was already rising - she had probably *_just* made it._

            "We need to talk," she told him.  She was completely exhausted, and was torn between making hi talk before she slept or after.  But it had to be done before she could move on.

            "I know," Nick said sadly.  "Nat…"

            She kissed his cheek and stepped away.  "Have fun."

            Nick watched as she went back upstairs.  He knew that her one greatest fear was that Janette would come back to Toronto and he would go back to her.  Of course, his actions had not helped.

            "You are a fool, Nicolas.  Do not mess up the first good thing to happen to you in centuries."

            "Why did you come back, Janette?"  After his last gross blunder, he thought he had seen the last of her for a *_long* time._

            "I'm moving back to Toronto," she said simply, as if that should be obvious.

            "The Enforcers are allowing that?"  Once a vampire moved on, the general rule was that they could not move back for at least a century.

            "Mm hm.  I misjudged the sunrise, and was closer to here than the Raven."  She paused slightly.  "What does a girl have to do to get a drink around here?"

            Nick got out a wine goblet and filled it with bloodwine from the fridge.  "Janette," he said as he handed her the glass, "I'm sorry.  I-"

            "Nicolas, Nicolas," she sighed.  "One of the reasons I came back was to attempt to assuage the guilt you no doubt carry.  Come, let us sit down."  She led him familiarly to the couch.

            "I-" he tried to start again, but Janette cut him off once more.

            "No, Nicolas, you listen to me.  I am tired-"

            "This can wait until you've slept…"

            "No, it can not.  I want to get this over with, Nicolas.  It takes too much energy to be bitter for a long time.  Yes, you are a selfish bastard who only thinks of yourself, half the time."  Nick's face fell as she said that, and started looking guiltier than ever.  It was the boyish honesty of his face she fell in love with, trying to work its unknowing magic again.

            "Janette, I shouldn't-"

            "No, you should not have.  But the fact of the matter is that you did.  Against my wishes.  Why, Nicolas?  I need to know why.'

            "Because I'm a selfish bastard," he repeated bitterly.  "I only think of myself."

            "That is not an answer."  Janette caressed his cheek, trying to charm an answer out of him.  Nick was forever the moody one, more apt to retreat inside his guilt than answer.

            Nick was silent or a long moment, leaning into her caress.  She looked so different from the last time he had seen her.  No longer was she the mortal mother, but the beautiful seductress again. Her hair was once more long and curly, the way she liked it best.  And, of course, she was dressed to the nines.

            "I… well, you and LaCroix are the only family I have, as you are forever telling me.  And…when Natalie dies I…"

            "Oo," she hissed, "Nicolas, sometimes you are as bad as LaCroix."  At the hurt look that flashed across his face, she sighed and explained.  "What?  You think LaCroix wants to travel alone though the centuries?  You think he pursues you for pure amusement?  Ah, Nicolas," she sighed again.  "You are so *_blind_* sometimes.  We, the two of us mon cherie, are his favorites.  Vampires are social creatures as much as you hate to admit it.  He is trying to do what *_he* sees as being best for his two golden children._

            "Uh," she sighed in disgust, "but that is not the point of this conversations.  You will *_never* understand *__anything* about LaCroix."_

            Nick's face took on the look of a whipped puppy.  "Janette, I'm sorry.  I-"

            "All you did as give me the choice.  I could have chosen to die.  I did not have to come back, but I did.  You are not to blame, Nicolas.  It took me a while to realize that, but it is true."

            "A while?" Nick questioned her.  "It hasn't even been a decade."

            "Oh, all right.  It took a very smart mortal boy to point it out to me."

            "Patrick?" Nick questioned.  "I thought you left him with his aunt."

            "Car crash," she said simply, her voice devoid of all emotion.

            "Janette, do you think-"

            "What was I supposed to do, Nicolas?  Leave him with some other foolish mortal who would end up dying on him?"  Her eyes flashed angrily at him.

            "I'm just-"

            "Oh, you're just, you're just, you're always just *_something*."  She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.  "I'm tired, Nicolas."_

            He nodded and kissed her on the cheek.  He should not have brought her across, but if she was not mad at him, that was enough on that point.  "Eternal friends?"

            "Eternal friends, eternal siblings.  Bonne nuit, mon ami."

            "Bonne nuit, Janette."

            The vampire seductress swirled the bloodwine in her glass as she watched the blonde knight retreat up the stairs.

~~~~{@

            After Natalie was effectively dismissed from downstairs, she went up to her and Nick's bedroom and threw herself down onto their bed.  This was completely unfair.  She finally had her life the way she wanted it, finally had somewhere that she felt safe.  And it was all about to be torn away.

            She had been dreading this day with every fiber of her being.  Nothing - no matter how many times Nick said he loved her, no matter how much he promised he would love her forever - nothing would let her escape the very real threat Janette posed.

            Natalie was not one to give up easily.  But on this… Oh, God.  It was almost beyond hopeless.  She was *_not* the type Nick usually went after.  Women from his past tended to be tall, dark, and sultry.  Like Janette.  *_Not_* like her - short, brunette, and frumpy.  And now that she was battered, bruised, and scarred…_

            It wasn't fair!

            She forced down the sobs that threatened to burst from her throat.  Jumping to conclusions - that was all she was doing.  How many fights had she had with Nick because one of them was jumping to conclusions?

            Besides.  There were two vampires downstairs who would undoubtedly be able to hear her.

            She could scream, she could cry, she could throw something.  But she wouldn't.  Always-in-control Lambert, that's who she was.  So what that her life was about to crumble down around her because of the return of Nick's former lover?  That was of no importance.

            She got up and grabbed her pajamas, quickly stripping and putting them on.  Under the covers she got, even though she was not tired.  The smell of Nick's cologne on the sheets comforted her slightly as she closed her eyes and tried to go to sleep anyway.

            Why didn't anything ever go right for her?

~~~~{@

            Nick paused at the doorway to watch Natalie.  She was curled on her side on the bed, not quite awake and not quite asleep.  The sounds of Janette in the downstairs bathroom could be heard by his ears, but all of his attention was focused on the brunette beauty in his - not, *_their* bed._

            How did he ever get so lucky?  He had fallen in love with Natalie from the inside out.  And now, he was completely hooked.  What would he do if he brought her across and she left him… like Janette did?

            He sighed and put on his black silk pajamas.  Worry lines were etched into Natalie's face tonight, lines that usually disappeared when she slept.  As he climbed under the covers, he gently smoothed back her hair.  Blearily, her eyes opened.

            Nick kissed her gently.  "I love you, Nat."

            "Love you too," she murmured.

            "Promise you'll never leave me?" he asked her, knowing she was half asleep and probably wouldn't remember this.

            "I promise."  She rolled over and snuggled up against him.

            Nick pulled her even closer, tucking her close up against him.  If only he could be sure she would keep that promise.

~~~~{@

            Natalie woke up with a stifled gasp.  That was one mother of a nightmare.  She glanced at Nick, who was still sound asleep with one arm draped lightly across her.  Why didn't he wake up anymore?  When she first moved in, if she woke up, so did he.  And she missed that.

            She needed a glass of milk, or wine, or something.  Carefully, ever so carefully, she eased out from under Nick's arm.  If he weren't going to wake up with her, it would be easier to let him sleep.  Her bathrobe was hanging on the back of the bathroom door, so she grabbed that before going downstairs.

            Janette was on the phone.  Natalie only paid passing attention as she headed for the sink.

            "Yes, Patrick, I promise.  I'll be there tonight.  As soon as the sun sets.  Yes, I promise.  Well, I had some things to discuss with Uncle Nick.  Yes, I know.  Patrick!  Yes, I'll see you tonight.  Goodbye, mon fils."

            Natalie gulped down a glass of water and a handful of Advil.  She alternated Advil with pain meds when she woke up in the middle of the nights.  It might be psychological, but it seemed to help her fall asleep again.

            Janette stood and put a robe over her lacy nightgown.  A talk needed to be had with Natalie, that much Janette knew.  And, she could now find out just what had happened to the coroner.  She could see the fading bruises and the slightly off way a shirt hung down her back.  Nick, for all his caring, was a man and could not understand some things the way another women could.

            "Natalie…"

            "What?" she snapped, turning around and setting her glass down.

            "I just wanted to know what happened to you."  Janette traced an arc around her face, not quite touching.

            "None of your business."  Her tone was clearly hostile.

            "I have absolutely no interest in taking your Nicolas from you, Natalie.  His love is like a suffocating blanket.  Ugh," she shuddered.  "You may like that, but I can not handle it.  And he has absolutely no intention of leaving you."

            Natalie studied her face as she talked.  Something - women's intuition, maybe - told her that Janette was telling the truth.  She could not believe her completely, but it was enough.

            "We - you, me, and LaCroix - are Nicolas' family.  He does not do well when his family is constantly at each other's throats."

            Natalie could see the truth of that.  Nick had enough trouble with his 'family' without having her and Janette constantly squabbling.  And if Janette was moving back to Toronto… She ran a hand through her hair, the action pulling up her sleeve to reveal a line of stitches, and sighed.

            "That looks like it hurt," Janette said.

            "Like hell," Natalie responded evenly.  "Have you seen the stuff in the news about the serial rapist/murderer?"

            Light dawned in Janette's eyes.  "Oh, you were the last victim."

            "The only one they got back alive," Natalie confirmed.  "I have no idea how they've managed to keep my name from the papers for so long, but…" She shrugged, leaning back carefully against the counter.

            "Did he…"

            Natalie shuddered.  "No, thank God.  Nick got to me before he got that far."

            "Natalie…" Janette paused to pull out a kitchen chair and sit down.  "Has Nicolas ever told you why LaCroix brought me across?"

            Natalie shook her head warily.  No, of course he hadn't.  Why would he?  She had no wish to hear anything about it, but knew there must be a point.  Janette was… changed.  She would have jibed Natalie before, bestowing scathing remarks rather than actually listening.  But now… Robert had done well.

            "I was married.  Then, it was very important that a wife give her husband a child.  When I could not conceive, I was nothing but a hindrance to him, because he could not get another wife with me around."  Her voice was matter-of-fact and emotionless, but Natalie started to listen closely.  Just because she disliked the vampire because they were rivals for Nick did not mean that she did not respect her, or think that they might be friends under different circumstances.

            "So, he sold me out for prostitution.  It was not like it is today.  Today, the girls have at least a tiny amount of control over who their clients are.  I had none, no choice, no matter how unwilling I was.

            "LaCroix utterly despises, can not stomach, only two things on this earth.  Don't tell him I told you this," she said suddenly.

            Natalie cocked an eyebrow, smiling slightly.  "Nick or LaCroix?"  Janette really was not all that bad.  And it had been so long since Natalie had another woman to talk to who *_knew* Nick - not since ever._

            A surprised burst of laughter came from Janette's lips.  "I was speaking of LaCroix, but both, I suppose.  Nicolas would not approve, and LaCroix prides himself on his reputation as a heartless pragmatist.  Two things - rape and what was done to you."

            Natalie had to interrupt at that.  "Wait, wait, wait.  What about Nick?"

            "As much as Nicolas sees differently, it is a parent disciplining a child.  Non, I meant unconsenting and for no apparent reason.  Torture for information or punishment, S&M sex, or disciplining a child does not bother him.

            "LaCroix told me that he could make it so no man would be able to touch me without my permission.  And he did."

            "I see you point.  Believe me, I do."  Natalie rolled her eyes.  "And if I thought I could bring up the subject with Nick without him freaking out, I would."

            "Oh, of course.  He can not 'bring you into his darkness'."  She rolled her eyes and shook her head in disgust.  "Nicolas thinks people *_change_* when they are brought across, loose all of their good qualities."

            "Do they?" Natalie asked curiously.

            "No, of course not," Janette scoffed. "He is the same as he was before.  Nicolas is a fool."

            "No argument there."

            "Natalie, if you ever do bring up the subject with him and he refuses… If it is what you *_really_* want, come talk to LaCroix or me.  We will either talk some sense into him, or do it ourselves."

            "Oh, I'll be talking to him, all right.  He promised me 'someday'." She smiled slightly.  "Thank God I've got allies in this."

            A small smile graced Janette's perfect lips.  She had broken the ice.  This mortal had earned her admiration and respect.  She took a moment to look over Natalie.

            "You look tired, mon ami," she said after a moment.

            Natalie pulled out a chair and sank down I it, scrubbing her hands across her face.  "Yes, I suppose I am.  But…" She paused for a long time.  "Do you ever have nightmares?"

            Janette glanced up the stairs, probing to see if Nick was awake at all.  No matter the answer, she did not wish Nick to be eavesdropping on the conversation anymore.

            "Oh, he's *_sound_* asleep," Natalie told her bitterly, noticing the glance.  "I doubt a herd of elephants would wake him up."

            Janette laughed a little.  "Ah, Nicolas never has had a clue about women.  He trusts you enough now not to walk out on him in the middle of the day, and to wake him if you need him.  He's not that bright, in that respect.  He would know if you left, or were taken."  Natalie looked unconvinced, so Janette stood up and said, "Come, I will show you."

            Natalie stood up and followed her.  They went over to the back door that led out to the fire escape.  Janette stopped there, but motioned Natalie to go outside, and be quiet.  As soon as she stepped outside, she heard Nick opening the bedroom door and come downstairs.  There was fear in his footsteps.

            "Nat?" he called, his voice nervous.

            Natalie came back inside - it was *_cold_* at night.  She and Janette shared a Look at his tone of voice, and Janette smiled slightly.

            "What?" she asked Nick innocently.

            "*_Jesus* Nat," he said, crossing the room and hugging her tightly.  "Don't *__do* that to me."  He buried his nose in her hair, inhaling deeply the calming scent of her cinnamon and jasmine blood._

            Natalie relaxed in his arms, laying her head on his chest.  Janette was right.  This could be an *_excellent_* asset.  She could explain a lot about Nick and his little quirks.

            Nick finally let her go.  "That wasn't funny."

            "Oo, Nicolas.  You just have no sense of humor.  Go back to bed."

            Nick nuzzled Natalie's cheek and glared at Janette.  "Are you coming?"

            "Soon," she said.  "Soon."

            Nick stepped away and kissed Janette on the cheek, then gave Natalie a gentle kiss on the lips.  "Thank God the two most important women in my life are getting along."

            Natalie and Janette sat back at the table, silent until they were sure Nick had fallen asleep again.  Natalie could not control the twinge of jealously as Nick kissed his sister; even though that was all it was - a brotherly peek on the cheek.

            "Yes, I used to," Janette replied to her earlier inquiry.  "But they faded eventually."

            "It was bad enough having to live it once," Natalie muttered.  "But it really bites having to live it over and over again."

            Janette sent a mental jab at Nick, waking him up.  He needed to hear whatever she would say.  "And Nick does not provide enough comfort?"

            Natalie shrugged.  "I don't wake him, usually."

            Janette felt Nick's shock that Natalie was having nightmares.  Utter disgust at his cluelessness filled her.  _Go back to sleep, Nicolas.  I just wanted you to hear that. _

            "Trust me, Natalie.  They eventually go away.  And you have to wake Nick up.  As I said before, he doesn't always have a clue when it comes to women."

            "*_Anyway*," Natalie said.  "You were talking to Patrick?"_

            Janette nodded, sighing.  "After Robert died, I left him with his aunt.  And the fool got herself killed in a car crash.  So I took him back.  He's sleeping over a friend's house while I get this issue with Nicolas over with."

            "Does he know that you're a vampire?"

            "Of course.  I had to assure him somehow that I wasn't going to up and die on him like everyone else has.  The Enforcers bend the rules a little for certain circumstances.  My turn for a question.  Who is the mortal upstairs?"

            "I did not know we were taking turns."  Natalie grinned.  "Abel.  He's the brother of the man who did this to me.  The poor kid's as much a victim as I.  He's living here for a while."

            Janette raised an eyebrow.  Natalie was stronger than she thought.  It was amazing that the 'good doctor', as LaCroix called her, could put everything behind her to allow a relative of Mr. Belasarius to live with her.  "I can smell him all around here.  He does not smell right."

            "Really?" Natalie asked, glancing up the stairs.  "Nick's never said anything."

            "Ugh.  Nicolas can barely smell the blood running through your veins.  Not every vampire has the acute sense of smell that others do."

            "Interesting," Natalie mused.  She filed that away to remember to write down later.

            Janette watched as Natalie fought t keep her eyes open.  "Natalie, you look exhausted.  Go back upstairs to bed."

            "I suppose you're right," Natalie said, standing up.  Although the conversation was interesting, and she was glad she and Janette were finally getting along, she really was falling asleep as she talked.  "G'night."

            "Bonne nuit, Natalie."  Janette smiled slightly.  "If I am gone before Nicolas wakes up, tell him I said goodbye.  And goodbye to you, too.  I'm glad we made some sort of peace.  In another situation, I think we would be friends."  Although the sentence was typically used as meaningless filler between enemies, Janette honestly meant it.

            Natalie laughed slightly.  Janette was not the kind of person who would have given her a second look.  In another situation, they would not have known each other.  "There's still a chance, I guess.  Goodbye, Janette."

            Natalie went back upstairs and crawled into bed with Nick.  He was asleep when she entered the room, but as she hung up her robe and got under the covers, he woke up.  So that he could see her, he leaned up on one elbow and began playing with her hair

            "You okay, love?"  He leaned over her and kissed the tip of her nose as one finger twirled a lock of her hair.

            "Yeah, I'm fine," she murmured sleepily.  A beautiful smile filled her face as he continued to play with her hair.

            He collapsed on his back and pulled her closer to him.  She happily moved where he wanted and rested her head on his chest.  He continued to stroke and play with her hair until her deep, steady breathing told him she was sound asleep.  Then he allowed himself to drift off.


	13. Sick

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 13/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  The girl is mine, the vampire is not.  Go figure.

**Chapter Thirteen**

            Natalie sighed and opened her laptop.  She had gotten back to sleep last night and not had any more nightmares, which was good.  But she was going stir-crazy, so she decided to get caught up on some paperwork.  Janette was gone before anyone woke up, and she had told Nick what Janette had said to tell him.  Abel was sitting on the couch, watching 'Ren and Stimpy'.  Boys would always be boys - she could hear him laughing quietly, the most he laughed since she met him.

            Before she could plug her computer into the phone jack, the phone rang.  She picked up the receiver, expecting it to be Nick checking on her, and had to move it away from her ear almost immediately as Janette's voice screeched out.

            "Nicolas!  Did you see what he did to my club!  He ruined it!  He destroyed it!  He-"

            "Mind toning it down a bit for the poor mortal?" Natalie broke in.

            There was dead silence on the line for a few seconds.  "Sorry, Natalie.  I am used to Nicolas living alone."

            Natalie could hear the carefully controlled anger in her voice.  "Nick's at work, if you want to try his cell."

            There was a pause.  "Are you busy?"

            "No, I'm bored out of my mind."

            "Do you mind?" Janette asked,

            "Not at all," Natalie said.  Abel was now leaning over the back of the couch, watching her.  He had grown more at ease around her, but more nervous in general.  It was odd.

            Janette took a deep breath.  "Did you *_see* what he did to my club?  To *_my_* club?  It's been destroyed!  Do you remember what it was like before?" Natalie murmured an affirmative.  "And have you seen it since I sold it to LaCroix?  He's killed it!  The bastard turned it into a… a gothic club for low-lifes!"_

            She trailed off into French, so Natalie went and curled up in Nick's chair in front of the TV.  Abel watched her closely as she moved, and for a few moments after she sat.  Then he turned back to the TV.  'Ren and Stimpy' was probably the stupidest, most asinine carton she had ever seen.  But the slight smile on Abel's face as he watched the cat and Chihuahua made her stop from asking him to change it.

            Janette went on for a while before she said anything in English again.  "Merde!  What, Patrick?"

            Natalie could hear the boy's voice.  "I wanted to know if you were going to make supper or if I could order out."

            "Eh, I'll come make you something.  Hold on.  Natalie?"

            "I'm still here."

            "Thank you for listening.  Oo, I'm going to kill him, though… You listen much better than Nicolas.  I have to go make Patrick supper."

            "Bye Janette."

            "Goodbye, Natalie."

            The phone clicked in her ear as she got up and put it back in its cradle.  Abel was watching her again.  It was odd.  If any other man had been staring at her as much as Abel, she would have sicced Nick on them.  But Abel, he kept his eyes on her in case there was a blow coming.  Right now, however, his eyes also held a question he didn't dare ask.

            "What?" she asked, coming back into the living room piece of the big room.

            His eyes flicked away quickly, back to the TV, fear suddenly filling them.  She changed her direction and sat on the couch next to him, touching his shoulder slightly, gently to get him to look at her.  She was surprised when he flinched and whimpered softly.

            "Hey honey.  I just wanted to know what you wanted to ask me.  It's okay.  Never mind."  When she touched him, she could feel him shaking slightly.  What was wrong all of a sudden?

            Abel watched her for another couple moments before returning his attention to the TV.  'Scooby Do' was on now.  Natalie was very patient, waiting for him to say or do something that would clue her in.  Slowly, surreptitiously, he was moving closer to her.  By the time the Mystery Team solved their mystery and Scooby and Shaggy got their Scooby Snacks, there was only an inch or so separating them.  Highly unusual.

            Out of the corner of her eye, she could see him nervously lick his lips and turn to look at her.  Wondering what was up, she turned to meet his eyes.  Unsurprisingly, they were filling with unhappy tears.

            "Abel, honey, what's the matter?"  She gave into the temptation that had haunted her every time he looked like this - like a beaten puppy.  He flinched as she reached out and gently ran her fingers through the short hair on the side of his head.  As she was pulling away, realizing he wasn't ready for a comforting caress, he leaned into her hand.  A few small tears spilled over his lower lids.

            She returned her hand to the beginning and ran it through again.  "Do you want to talk at all, sweetie?"

            He shook his head slightly, drawing his knees up to his chest.  Natalie could feel the heat radiating from his skin as she stroked his head - he was burning up.  She stopped her stroking and slowly moved her hand around his shoulders, waiting for him to protest.  He trembled slightly under his thin T-shirt, but didn't flinch or make a noise.  Ever so gently, she pulled him so he was leaning on her.  He did not let go of his knees, but after a few seconds of her just rubbing her hand up and down his arm, he relaxed and rested his head on her shoulder.  She could feel his hot tears dripping on to her shirt.

            "Oh, sweetie," she murmured, "you're burning up.  You need to see a doctor."  She could feel the sobs shaking silently through his body.

            "No, I'm fine," he sobbed out loud.

            He was burning up, but it was a dry heat.  He was not sweating, which wasn't good.  "Honey, you have to have a temp of at least 103.  I'm a doctor, sort of.  At least let me check you out."  She could not begrudge anyone who hated doctors.

            He pushed away from her, scrambled away from her.  "No, I'm fine.  Really."  His tear-streaked face was panicked.

            Natalie held out her hands. "It's okay.  Abel, it's okay.  I'm not going to make you do anything.  It's okay."  She paused and regarded him, quaking at the other end of the couch.  "You've got that 'I desperately need a hug' look again, sweetie."

            He stayed at his end for a moment, then literally crawled across the couch to her.  She wrapped her arms around his hot, skinny body, cradling him.  His body shook with his sobs.  His *_silent* sobs._

            "It's going to be okay, Abel," she whispered into his ear.  "Whatever it is, it's going to be okay.  But I can't help you if you don't talk to me."  He clung to her tighter, sobbing harder.

            Abel cried as Natalie held him.  Oh God, he felt… safe right now, like he could cry without fear of being punished, allow her to touch him without feeling pain.  How could he tell her?  What if, once she knew… Even so, he only had one more week.  He needed to find somewhere else… if only for a day or two.  He might have to go ask… them… for help.

            Just the thought made him sob harder.  Natalie held him tightly, but not too tight, not enough to make him freak out.  She ran one hand through his hair over and over, petting him.  He luxuriated in the contact between them, human contact he craved but did not know how to ask for.

            When he was slightly calmed down, Natalie started again.  She was *_really_* worried about him.  "Abel, seriously.  You're really warm."

            He tensed up; so she let him go, let him scoot away.  "I'm fine," he sniffled.

            Natalie grabbed his hands, even though he flinched away, knowing she was pushing it.  "Sweetie.  Abel, look at me so I know you're really listening."  He dragged his eyes to meet hers.  "Just let me take your temperature and look at your throat to make sure you don't have strep, or something like that.  Quick, easy, and painless.  I promise."

            He looked at her, not trying to pull away anymore.  "Okay," he whispered.

            She squeezed his hands gently and got up to grab the thermometer.  She found the flashlight while she was up, too.  When she came back, his eyes were very big, very blue, and very scared.  She put the flashlight on the coffee table and sat down next to him.  He watched her every move.  What in the world made him this afraid of being sick?  On second thought, she didn't really want to know.

            "Just a thermometer," she said, handing it to him.  "Okay?"  He ran his finger down to the tip and nodded quickly, handing it back.  "Open up," she said, expertly sticking it under his tongue.  "Okay."  When it beeped a minute later, she took it out.  "104?  Sweetie…" The tears in his eyes stopped her; instead, she picked up the flashlight.  "Open wide and say 'ah'."

            His eyes rolled in their sockets, watching her closely as she looked down his throat with the flashlight.  Satisfied, she switched it off.  "The good news is, no white patches, so you don't have strep.  The bad news is that, with a fever of 104, you should have something."

            "I'm fine, I promise," he said, trembling.  "My temp'll stay this high, or go up a little for a week, then it will go back to normal.  I promise."

            "Okay.  I believe you.  It's okay, sweetie."  Despite his fear, he had spoken as though it had happened before.  He wasn't lying, she was positive about that.

            He watched for a long moment as she sat there and watched him.  Finally, he crawled back over to her side.  It was odd, more of a slink than a crawl.  Instead of being awkward, as usual when a human crawled, it was graceful - almost feline.  He stopped right next to her, not quite touching.  If she wanted him nearer, she would invite him.

            Which she did, lifting her arm up so he could come next to her.  He sat down, crying silently again.  They were so nice to him.  What was he going to of if he couldn't come back?  If he went to the others for help, they would probably just keep him.  And he couldn't go back to that life - he would kill himself first.

            Natalie ran her fingers through his hair, trying to calm him down.  He was absolutely petrified of something, but since he would not tell her what, the most she could do was try to comfort him in general.  And now that he wasn't shying from physical contact, she wasn't about to discourage him.

~~~~{@

            The next night, it was pouring rain fit to beat Jesus.  As Nick and Natalie slept late in their bed, another couple cuddled in a different bed.

            "You need to shave, Javier.  Your stubble's growing into a beard."

            Vachon rubbed the scratchy side of his face against Tracy's cheek.  "You think so, Querida?"

            "Mm, yes," she murmured, snuggling closer to him.  He happily held her closer, loving the feel of her silky skin rubbing against his.  He wanted her body just as much as he wanted her blood, now and forever.  Vampires weren't known for their fidelity, but with Tracy, he was willing to give it a shot.

            "Vachon?"  Her heads nestled perfectly on his chest.

            "Querida?" Her hair was as soft as goose down.  He would never tire of running his fingers through it and hearing her murmurs of appreciation.

            "Why did we stay in Toronto?  Not hat I'm complaining, but I thought once I was brought across, we would have to leave."

            Vachon laughed, the sound rumbling through his chest.  "Technically, we were supposed to.  But Knight had the General pull a few strings with the Enforcers."

            "I'll have to thank him tomorrow night at work."

            They cuddled happily, neither wanting to get up, not even to feed.  Both would be happy to stay like this forever.  Suddenly, they stiffened as a sense of danger washed over them.  Tracy rose up on her elbows and looked at Vachon.

            "What the hell was that?" she asked.

            "I don't know."  Vachon got up, spilling her off of him.  "But I hear something."  He pulled on a pair of jeans, going commando.

            "Hey!  Wait for me!"  Tracy hopped out of bed after him, taking a bit longer to follow him because she had to find pants *_and_* some kind of shirt.  In the end, she had on a different pair of his jeans and one of his shirts.  It felt *_very* right to be wearing his clothes._

            Vachon motioned for her to be silent as she almost ran into his back.  She could now sense another vampire and hear a mortal heart beat, both outside in the pouring rain.  Vachon wanted her to stay back, which pissed her off majorly.  He was doing the same thing Nick did - protecting her like she couldn't take care of herself.  She wanted to beat the male chauvinist out of them both sometimes.

            Vachon opened the door to exit the church.  His eyes and senses were confronted by the pouring rain, a man, and a girl.  It was the same man and girl who had brought him back and informed him of Tracy's peril.

            The blonde vampire lay on the ground, already drenched by the deluge of rain.  He was pale, even for a vampire, and wasted.  His unconscious head was cradled in the girl's lap.  The girl, herself, did not look too good for a mortal.  She smelled of blood and death - there was no doubt in Tracy's mind that she had been badly cut up.

            Of course, the amount of blood on her clothes and their ragged condition was also a dead giveaway.

            Vachon stared at the two people in front of him.  "Please," the girl begged.  If he had only heard her voice and not seen the tears streaming from her eyes and mingling with the rain, he never would have known she was sobbing.  "Help us.  He's dying."

(A/N:  Hm.  Is Abel sick?  Is he dying?  Is he contagious?  Is it Ebola?  Or is it something else entirely?  And what happened to the girl and the vampire?  Why are they back?  Are they were just for help for themselves?  Or are they looking to be helped and help in return?  Oh, and I'm taking votes on whether I should kill Abel off or not.  Cuz I have a plot in my head that can go with him dead, and one that can jive with him alive.)


	14. The Guardian Angels Are Back!

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 14/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  Khel and Laer and Faerûn belong to WotC.

Thank You's:  I just realized I've been being a total and complete ass.  Okay, let's see.  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to Rouen French for not being pissed when stuff I read in her fics (hint hint, nudge nudge, go read 'em) sort of migrates into mine by accident.  And thanks to Splinter for that totally awesome review for Chapter Thirteen.  ::big grin::  

**Chapter Fourteen**

            It took Vachon a second to react.  Then he turned to Tracy, who was peering over his shoulder.  "Go get your cell phone.  Call Knight and Dr. Lambert - tell the doc to bring her stuff like Nick was hurt."  When Tracy didn't react quick enough, he snapped, "*_Go_* Tracy!"

            Tracy disappeared in a flash.  Vachon went out in the rain, his pants instantly soaking through.  The girl was murmuring into the vampire's ear, a language Vachon did not recognize.  If he had to hazard a guess, though, he bet she was making promises that everything would be okay.  He touched her shoulder gently to get her attention.  She couldn't be more than a teenager.  Had she been an adult, or a vampire, he would have said something to get her attention.  But since she was a child, he didn't think anything of touching her shoulder.

            He was surprised by the girl's instantaneous reaction.  Faster than he could react, she had his arm pinned behind his back and him on the soaking wet ground.  He was pinned, unable to move even though he should have easily been able to throw off the mortal.

            "Sorry," she said when he stopped struggling - it only took him a few seconds to realize he couldn't get away until she let him up.  She allowed him to stand.  "*_Please_* don't touch me.  My nerves are really strung tight right now."

            Vachon brushed the dirt off his chest, backing off.  Honestly, he was in awe of the two people in front of him, even though one was unconscious.  They had saved his life.  And, while that wouldn't mean much to another vampire, it meant a lot to him.

            Tracy came flying back down the stairs, almost tripping and falling.  "Nick says they'll be here in a few minutes.  When I told him - I think they're going to break all the speed limits."

            "Let's bring him inside, out of the rain," Vachon said.

            The girl nodded and backed away, so he and Tracy could get the vampire.  They didn't go up the stairs; merely lay the dead eight in the foyer.  The girl followed them in closely.  She had a drastic limp - almost bad enough so that she couldn't walk.

            "What happened?" Tracy asked, the cop in her taking over.  Someone had obviously tried to kill these two.  That person needed to be taken off the streets - especially since it looked like he or she had almost succeeded on the vampire.

            "Eh," the girl waved her right hand dismissively.  "Nothing important.  People tried to kill me, kill him.  Don't worry 'bout getting them off the street.  Number one, they weren't in this particular world.  Number two, I killed them all."

            The absolute lack of emotion on her face made the smart crack die on Vachon's lips.  After seeing - no, experiencing how easily she could pin him, he knew the girl was dead serious.  Her eyes had gone cold and empty, like a switch had been flicked.  Tracy recognized those eyes - they were the eyes of a sociopath.  It chilled her to the bone to see them on one so young.

            "What?" the girl asked.  "Nobody touches me and mine.  Not if they know what's good for them."  The switch was thrown, and her eyes were alive again.  She sank down on the floor beside the unconscious vampire, fingering his hair again.  The look on her face was one of utter weariness.  Tracy wondered how much of it was real and how much was feigned.

            Vachon heard the distinctive sound of Knight's Caddy pulling up in front of the church.  What had Tracy told him to make him come so fast?  The two rushed through the rain into the church.  Nick's reaction was typical - complete shock at who was on the floor.  He just stopped and stared.  Natalie, on the other hand, got right to business, hunkering down by the girl.

            "What happened?" she asked, taking out a packet of blood.

            "There was a battle," the girl said tiredly.  "They took him, drained him, and shot him up with garlic.  Don't bother," she said as she saw Natalie beginning to cut open the blood packet.  "He won't even swallow it.  And when he does, it comes right back up."  She scrubbed her right arm across her eyes.  "Gods, he won't even take my blood."

            Natalie took the girl at her word, putting away the unit.  "Nick, I didn't think to bring anything for an IV…"

            "Then we'll have to take them back to the loft," Nick said.  He wasn't about to object - there were many things he wanted to ask the girl and the vampire.

            The girl used her right arm and the railing to pull herself up.  "He-llo.  One of 'them' is right here and does *_not* appreciate being talked about as if she's not.  If we're leaving, let's go.  I don't need him dying on me a second time."_

            Nick nodded his apology.  He and Vachon carried the vampire between them and lay him in the back.  The girl limped out, bobbing up and down like a buoy in a rough ocean.  She slid in after the vampire, lifting his head so it lay in her lap.  Natalie made a mental note to find out how badly she had been hurt, too.

            "Thank you so much," the girl said to Vachon, who was still standing next to the Caddy.  "This was the first place I could think of to come for help."

            Vachon nodded once.  "My place is always open for you to appear in any time."  It was the best he could come up with at the moment.

            The girl smiled slightly, even though it wasn't all that funny.  "I hope we didn't… interrupt anything."  She eyed the conquistador, and the water running down his bare chest.

            Vachon leered and turned away, returning to Tracy, who was standing in the doorway.  She had thoughtfully stayed relatively out of the rain, except for that one time, and, thusly, was *_much* drier than him._

            "You look like a drowned rat," she told him.

            "Thank God Screed's not here, then," Vachon joked.  Friends came and friends went - the carouche was merely one in a line of them.  His hair and jeans were plastered to his body - he could only imagine how he looked.

            "Go dry off," she laughed as he tried to grab her, then shrieking as he shook his head and splattered her with water.

            She followed him up the stairs and leaned against the wall as he grabbed a towel and started to rub his head.  As he peeled off the jeans, she licked her lips in appreciation.

            "So, those were the guys that dug you up?" she asked as he pulled on boxers, sighing in disappointment.

            "Uh huh," he muttered, searching for his brush.  If he did not untangle his long hair when it was wet, it would become horrendously snarled, something he did not want to have to deal with.

            "And that was it?  You just pass them off to Nick and Natalie?" Tracy was amazed that he hadn't even said 'thank you for saving my unlife', or something to the effect.

            Vachon stopped and stared at her, a look of honest confusion filling his face.  "What?  They needed help, Querida, and getting the doc was the best I could do.  If they'd wanted anything else, they would've said so."

            Tracy shook her head and sighed, smiling.  Vampires were so naïve in some ways.  She wondered if she would get like that as the years progressed.  Vachon abandoned the search for the comb and came at Tracy, wrapping her in his arms.

            "You'll learn not to assign much importance to anything, Querida.  Life's too long."  He nuzzled her neck, his fangs scratching against the vein suggestively.

            Tracy grinned happily and inclined her head a little, to give him better access.

~~~~{@

            As Nick pulled away from the curb, Natalie turned in her seat to look at the two in the back.  The muscles along her side twinged, not liking the way her body was angled.

            The most pressing question in her mind was, "What's your name?"

            "Nire."  Her fingers stroked the vampire's cheeks.  "He's Jander.  If we've totally frelled up your seats from the water and blood, I'll pay to have everything reupholstered and cleaned and waxed and whatever."

            Nick shook his head slightly.  "Don't worry about it," he said, even though his first thoughts had been along the lines of worrying what their condition would do to his precious Caddy.

            "How old are you?" Natalie asked.

            "Why?" Instant suspicion filled Nire's eyes.

            "Uh, I was just curious," Natalie responded, surprised by the reaction to the simple question.

            Nire nodded once.  "Sorry.  It's been a *_long* few days.  I just turned sixteen."_

            That was pretty much what Natalie had thought.  Before she could get more information out of the girl, Nick interrupted with a query.  "More importantly, how old is *_he_*?"  By the look on Natalie's face, she didn't understand the importance of the question.  But, judging by her response, the girl did.  Jander felt as powerful as LaCroix, which boded trouble most of the time.

            Nire shrugged with her right shoulder.  "We're not quite sure.  Crazy shit happened, and…" She shrugged the one shoulder again.  "If that's going to be an issue, tell me what to do, lend me whatever I need, and I'll take him elsewhere."

            Nick risked a quick glance to the back seat, briefly meeting Nire's understanding gray eyes.  A teenager in appearance, but not in mind.  She spoke with the surety of one who had seen too much for their age.  Nick would guess that she had grown up a long time ago.

            "I don't know if it will be," he said honestly.  "It depends on the moods of the elders."

            Natalie wished she could understand what was happening.  The conversation that just transpired was important, that she knew.  But the reason behind the importance remained veiled to her.  She would ask Nick later, when they were alone.  In the meantime, she returned to all the questions any female would ask a child who was traveling alone.  As far as she was concerned, Nire was alone, because vampires could not have children.  Therefore, she had to have parents somewhere, who might be worrying about her.

            "Where are your parents?"  They were almost to the loft.

            "How the frell should I know?  I assume they're at my house, sitting in front of the TV.  My house being in the States, in Massachusetts."

            "Do they know you're here?" Natalie could see Nick rolling his eyes at her questions.

            "No.  I don't live with them that much anymore.  Khel and Laer know I'm somewhere with Jander, though.  They're my adoptive parents."  She paused for a second as Nick turned down the side street that led to the loft.  "What else do you want to know?  Or is that it?"

            "I need to know exactly what happened," Natalie replied as Nick pulled into the garage.  She was giving up on the personal questions that should be answered.

            "What happened?  What's it look like happened?  We got the dren kicked out of us," Nire said crossly.  "Us two've managed to make enemies of most of the vampire population of Faerûn, and a whole group of them decided to gang up on us and the rest of The Band.  After a while of fighting, Jander decided that if they got him to do with as they liked, they would leave the rest of us in peace.  So, the stupid bastard gave himself up and told me not to try to rescue him."

            Nire continued to tell the story as she got out of the Caddy and Nick slung the limp vampire over his shoulder.  "Half of the group took him away, and half stayed to try and kill us all."  As she talked, her accent became more and more pronounced.  Natalie, who had spent a few years in the States, didn't recognize it as any one accent, but rather a unique blend of many from across the country.  "But we turned the tables and killed all of them.

            "Of course, as the rest of mi familia took care of the wounded, I went after el chicolisto here.  I went to the shack they had him chained up in-"

            "How did you know where he was?"  Natalie interrupted.

            "Whoa," Nire said.  "What'd I do?  Why am I being cross-examined?  Telepathy, my friend, is a wonderful thing.  So, I *_knew* when they were draining almost all of the blood out of him.  And I *__felt* it when they injected liquid garlic into his bloodstream.  Don't frell with me - I'm not lying."  Nire glared at Natalie, a gaze that would have made the toughest vampire quake._

            Natalie spread her hands.  "I didn't mean to imply that - I was just curious."

            Nire sighed and squeezed her eyes shut briefly.  "I know, sorry.  It's- My nerves are at the snapping point right now.  Bear with me, okay?"

            Natalie smiled at the girl as Nick laid Jander on the couch.  As she went to the closet and grabbed out an IV line, and the fridge to get packets of blood she stored in the bottom for emergencies, she said a silent prayer of thanks that Abel was at work.  The young man might know of the existence of vampires, but given his experience with them, she wanted to have everything settled before he got back.

            "That is one big-ass needle," Nire commented from her spot on the floor.  She had settled herself in the middle of the couch, leaning her back against the front.

            "It has to be," Natalie explained.  "It's going to go directly into his stomach."

            Nire sighed and leaned her head back, staring at the ceiling.  "How the hell do we manage to get into such messes, eh?"  She turned her head to watch Natalie as she hung up the bag of blood and pulled up the vampire's shirt.  She jammed in the needle and waited.  His body should start sucking in the blood.

            It wasn't.

            Nire watched for five seconds or so, before speaking to the unconscious elf.  "You god-damned fucking bastard.  Don't you *_dare* give up.  I have absolutely no compunction for following you to the Nine Hells, or wherever, and making you miserable for eternity."  The controlled anger in her voice was overwhelming._

            Natalie felt pity whelming within her for the teen.  This wasn't working.  She glanced back at the blood packet, just in time to see it begin to drain.

            "Damn right you better listen to me," Nire muttered.  In contrast to her voice, she reached her right arm across her body and gently took his hand, whispering something in another language.

            Natalie had no idea what she said.  Nick, however, knew exactly - and his mouth dropped open in shock at the fact that the girl was speaking Ancient Latin.

            "//Please, my love, \\" she whispered.   "//Don't leave me like this, my light, my hero.  You've saved my life time and time again; don't make me look like a failure.  I need you, the babies need you, everyone needs you.  Get better, please, angel of mine. \\"

            Nick did not say anything, however.  It was a private moment, obviously not meant to be understood by anything.  Plus, Nire had an air about her that said that her private business was her own.  How she came to speak the language of LaCroix's childhood was none of his business.

            Now that no one was moving, no one was freaking out, he had a chance to study his two 'guardian angels'.  Starting with the girl, Nire, he was surprised at how she looked up close.  Obese and pimple-faced was the first thing that stuck out.  Curly brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail, with two tiny tendrils framing her face.  As he watched, she ran a hand through to the elastic, pushing the two pieces back exasperatedly.  She wore glasses, making her gray eyes seem slightly bigger, and her lips had a chewed on look.  He saw why as she sucked the lower one under and started biting at it, slowly tearing off the skin in bits and pieces.

            Something seemed slightly off about her and it took him a moment to realize it was her clothes.  They, and those of the vampire, had changed in the past few seconds.  Natalie's eyes bugged out at the sudden difference, but she did not say anything.  They were both dressed in the clothes of an adventurer of… of no specific time period, but he would guess it was the dress featured in every fantasy book every written - breeches and tunics, with the breeches tucked into a pair of nice leather boots.  Both were armed with multiple weapons, and he would guess that there were more hidden on each person.

            Nick's attention was drawn to Jander, the vampire.  Natalie was changing the blood unit again.  The vampire was long and lithe, but weighed little.  His bronze skin had a sickly pallor to it, but that was probably from the garlic and loss of blood.  His ears were covered by straight, shoulder-length gold hair.  And gold was the only word that could be used - not blonde like his, not yellow like straw, but the color of spun gold, and shining in the same light.  His features were fine-boned and angular.  An errant movement by Natalie brushed a wisp of hair off his ear, which revealed it to be long and pointed.

            "What is he?" It just slipped out of Nick's mouth.  Natalie glared at him for his tactlessness, but Nire merely transferred her attention from the ceiling to him.

            "An elf.  And a vampire," was her matter-of-fact reply.  "Don't look so shocked.  If vampires can exist, why not elves?  You truly know little about your own world."  She dropped her head back and closed her eyes.  "The right hand doesn't even know that there is a body, much less a left hand."

            Natalie paused in changing the bag of blood again, asking, "Human blood won't-"

            "Blood is blood is blood where he comes from, be it human, elven, or animal."

            Everyone was silent for a long moment, Nick and Natalie watching the blood pack drain.  Jander's body should have still been sucking it in like there was no tomorrow, but it was slowing down instead.  As that bag of plasma ran empty, she put up one more.  Nire's head jerked up suddenly.

            "Mystra!" she swore.  "He's gonna heave.  Get a bucket or something."

            There was one under the sink, which Nick went to grab. He heard Nire muttering in Latin again.

            "//Mystra, Mielikki, and Ao, don't you *_dare_* abandon us now.  Let me use my arm for ten minutes at the most - just dull the pain. \\"

            As Nick returned with the bucket, she used both hands to roll the vampire on his side and hold his head.  Almost immediately, Jander began retching blood into the bucket.  Nick almost dropped it and began retching himself - the blood coming from the other vampire's mouth was almost pure garlic.  The scent of blood coming from the girl began to strengthen.  The back of her tan shirt was almost entirely red with blood and sopping wet, but the stain still began to spread.  As did the one on her left thigh.  She was hurt badly, but obviously didn't care.

            When the elf was done retching, Nire let go of his hair and wiped off the blood flecked around his mouth with her sleeve.  She dipped her fingers in the blood in the bucket and brought it to her nose.

            "Ugh.  Almost pure garlic," she said as she absently wiped her fingers on her pants.  "If they weren't already crumbled to dust, I'd kill the asses who did this to him."

            Natalie watched the plasma, which was slowly draining.  Too slow for her liking, but she did not know of the anatomy of an elf, so maybe it was supposed to.  Even with the evidence of his species staring her in the face, she could barely believe it.  Elves were supposed to be little, right?  This one had to be at least six feet tall.  Tall and wiry.  This pack was going to take a while to drain, so she turned to Nire.

            "What about you?" she asked.

            "What about me?"

            "You're hurt too."

            "I'll live."

            "With that amount of blood?" Nick interjected.

            "It's not all mine," she said calmly.

            "But," Natalie reasoned, "you're limping like your leg's going to fall off.  And you can't use your left arm."

            Nire sighed.  "He's going to be okay?"

            "I don't know," Natalie answered honestly.  She had a feeling that the girl would not appreciate being told all those coddling phrases that doctors used.

            She sighed and spoke to the vampire.  "//I'll be right back, baby.  I need to get some clean clothes for us both. \\" Then she turned to Nick and Natalie.  "I'm gonna go get some clothes.  Be right back."

            "How-" Natalie began, but the girl disappeared.  "Nick…" she said, drifting off.  This was too weird for her.  A dead body sitting up on her morgue table was nothing compared to this.  Nick was a problem to be solved, an extremely cute problem to be solved.  This was…this was oddity at its finest.

            "I have no answers," he said, just as mystified.  He thought he had seen everything, but apparently not.  He did notice that whenever she did something like disappear, an overwhelming feeling of danger washed over him.  Could it be an instinctive thing?

            Before he could say anything else, like commenting on the feeling of danger, Nire was back just as abruptly as she had disappeared.

            "How'd you do that?" Natalie asked immediately.

            "Magic," was the simple answer.  "Where's your bathroom?"

            "I'll show you," Natalie offered.  "Nick, call me when that bag's almost empty."  The girl was most likely going to need help of some kind with her injuries.

            Natalie led her to the bathroom.  She stopped outside of the door as Nire walked in.  Not wanting to assume anything with this teen, she asked, "Do you need any help?"

            Nire paused, her right hand on the doorjamb.  "Yeah, I guess so."

            Natalie followed her in and shut the door behind her.  She watched as Nire began using her right hand to take off her weapons.  Her eyes bugged out as the pile grew…and grew…and grew.  The teen stripped off her boots and socks with one hand, as if she did it often.  Then came the breeches, with the same ease.  More weapons came off under those.  Then she grabbed a washcloth out of the pile she had brought and limped over to the edge of the tub, sitting down, lifting her left leg with her hand and putting it inside the tub, and turning on the hot water.

            Her leg was caked in blood, more oozing out of a deep gash.  She started with her ankle and began washing off the blood.  Periodically, she ran the washcloth under the water so the red ran down the drain.  The area around the gash was eventually cleaned, but the cut itself was saved for last.  She paused before she started cleaning out the slash and took a deep breath.

            "Do you have any hydrogen peroxide?" she asked.

            Natalie silently got it for her, then watched as Nire began to clean the cut.  Her admiration for the teen was growing.  It obviously hurt like hell as she cleaned it, but there was little vocal indication of the pain - no tears, no cries of pain, no curses, just hisses every once in a while.  She let out a string of curses, however, when she poured the peroxide on it, but they were quiet and muttered.

            "Hand me the towels," she asked.

            Natalie got the two towels out of the pile of clothing.  One went on the floor and Nire lifted her leg onto it.  She used the other one to towel off the water, hissing as he patted the gash dry.

            "Mmkay, now can you give me the gauze and the tape?"  She had brought all of her own supplies.

            "That needs stitches," Natalie commented.

            "Bullshit."  She winced as she began to wrap the gauze around her fat leg.  "Okay, not dren, but no one's getting near me with any needles.  When all of the others have been healed, I'll let the clerics heal me.  Don't worry about it - I'll seriously be fine."  She continued wrapping, the blood slowly seeping through the white.

            Then she pulled on a pair of jeans and buttoned them, one-handedly.  Natalie had to admire her talent.  If she lost an arm, she would probably cope well.

            "I'm telling you right now, my shoulder's worse.  But I refuse to go to the hospital, I'm not getting stitches or staples, so don't bother suggesting it.  I'll survive - I always have.  But I'm going to have to take off my bra - so if that's going to bother you, skadoodle and I'll figure out how to clean it myself."

            "Nope, go ahead."  If it was worse than the leg, then she needed to see it.  Just in case.

            Nire paused and muttered, "Fuck it."  She shuffled through the pile of sharp objects on the floor, metal clanking against metal, and pulled out thin knife.  She slit the sleeve down her left arm and left side, then allowed the shirt just to fall off.  Natalie gasped at the blood and the wound.  It was long - six inches at the least - and was dribbling blood freely.  Her back was caked in blood from it.

(A/N:  How badly is Nire really hurt?  Will she assent to going to a doctor, or letting Natalie stitch her up?  Is Jander going to croak?  How's Abel going to react to all of this?  Am I ever going to get this fic back on track?  Can you tell I'm bored as hell?)


	15. Fear

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 15/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  Nire belongs to me.  Jander belongs to WotC and Christie Golden.  The first song Nire sings is "I'll Be" by Edwin McCain.  The lyrics are scrambled a bit, to take only what I needed.  I've always said life needs a soundtrack, and either Nire or I provide it.  The second song is "Come Sail Away" by STYX.  The Langoliers are the sole property of Stephen King.

**Chapter Fifteen**

            "Oh my God, I can see bone!" Natalie exclaimed.

            "Yeah, yeah, yeah,' said Nire impatiently.  "I don't care.  Just put on the frellin' latex gloves there and get the blood off and wrap it."

            "This *_needs_* stitches," Natalie tried to reason with her.  "It won't heal right without stitches, and it will most likely get infected."

            Nire did her one-shouldered shrug again.  "That's a risk I'm willing to take."

            Natalie sighed and pulled on the gloves Nire had thoughtfully provided.  The teen had that finality in her voice that said there was no reasoning with her.  She ran the washcloth under the hot water that was still running in the tub, and began to gently wipe the blood off.

            "You should at least go to a doctor and get these checked out."

            "Yeah, and they'll start asking questions I don't have answers for.  At least, not ones they'll believe."

            Unfortunately, Natalie had no doubt that she was right.  "Is it okay if I ask them?"

            "Knock yourself- holy motherfucker of gods that hurt! -out.  I'm not promising answers that you'll believe."

            "Sorry, but it's going to," Natalie apologized as she dabbed around the freely bleeding gash.  She was reluctant to actually clean the wound, due to the severity of it - Nire should really have at least some local anesthesia.

            Almost as if reading her mind and sensing her reluctance, Nire said, "You better pour a shitload of peroxide on that.  I have no idea what was on the blade that did it, and I'm sure as hell not going to deal with an infection because *_you're_* too squeamish to cause me pain."

            Natalie tried not to take offense at the derogatory tone of Nire's voice.  Had she been hurt that bad, she would be snappish, too.  "This is going to hurt like hell."

            "No shit, Sherlock.  Bring it on."  Her muscles tensed as she steeled herself for the pain.

            "You're lucky this missed the muscles," Natalie said as she poured the biting fluid directly into the bloody wound.  It immediately began hissing and bubbling.  Nire let out a long hiss of air from between her teeth as Natalie poured a little more on.  It really was remarkable that none of the muscle or tendons or anything important other than blood vessels had been cut.  The fact that she could see bone should have meant that everything was relatively ripped up.  But, no, everything that allowed Nire to move her arm was intact.

            "This bites," Nire said through gritted teeth.  "The best part about the fizzy stuff is watching it fizz."  This teenager had more confidence than Natalie would ever have.  Here she was, standing literally half naked in front of a complete stranger, her belly hanging over the waistband of her jeans, and she still had a sense of humor.  "It was almost worth it to get half killed, just because I knew I would get to watch the peroxide bubble.  Except I forgot that I didn't have eyes in the back of my frellin' head."  A morbid sense of humor.

            "This needs stitches," Natalie told the teen again, hoping reiterating it would convince her of the necessity.

            "And I need a piccolo.  But that's not happening anytime soon, either.  Frell!" she swore again.  "Okay, just wrap the thing up.  I can't keep the pain from the babies much longer," she muttered on the end.

            "Babies?" Natalie asked, totally sidetracked from her original aim in questioning.

            "Mine by adoption - don't worry.  We have a special bond where - ah, never mind, it's too complicated."

            Natalie didn't press it - she had a headache and knew this would just make it worse.  Instead, she quickly made a long pad of gauze and taped it over the injury.  Then she wrapped gauze around Nire's body over and over again, until the bandage was totally covered.  Nire grabbed a bra out of her pile of clothing and put her arm through the straps.

            "Snap it on the second clasp, okay?"

            "Are you *_sure_* you want this going across that?"

            Nire snorted. "I'm too big not to wear one.  I'll live, as usual."

            Natalie snapped it, and Nire pulled on a T-shirt ('Don't talk to me while I'm talking to myself').  "Thank.  I owe you."

            "No, now we're even."

            Nire grinned as Nick yelled, "Nat!  The bag's almost empty!"

            The teen started chewing on her lower lip again.  "Frell.  That should have emptied a lot quick, shouldn't it've?"

            Natalie nodded once.  "That's still bleeding, so it's probably going to go through your shirt."

            "I know.  Why do you think I'm wearing black?  Besides the fact that it's practically the only color I own, it's the second best for hiding bloodstains."

            "Second best?" Natalie went out to put one more bag of plasma up, with Nire following.

            "Yep.  Second best.  The common myth of it being the best is not true at all.  The blood dries with a red tinge.  But, eh, I'm babbling.  What time is it?"

            The abrupt subject change was not lost on Nick, who had been eavesdropping, and was glad they had finally come out of the bathroom so it was no longer eavesdropping.  He knew from experience what was going through the girl's mind.  Babbling could get one killed around the wrong people, and everything about the girl said that she was around the wrong people more often than not.

            "About midnight," he answered her.

            "The Langoliers are coming," she muttered, her fingers tracing a light path down Jander's sleeve.  "Gods-be-damned, if you die on me you stupid elf, I'll kill you."  She returned her attention to Nick and Natalie.  "Be right back.  I gotta get my stuff."

            She disappeared into the bathroom.  Nick listened closely to her heart beat, but it didn't alter once.  He did hear clanking metal and rustling cloth, and guessed that she was hiding weapons on her body again.  Talking, having an actual conversation with this girl was going to be interesting.  Natalie was watching him closely, silently.

            "What?" he asked quietly.

            "Nothing," she said quickly.  "Why?"

            "No reason."  Nick went over and hugged her in his arms.  She was worried about something, and needed comforting.  That, he could see.  But, as usual, what it was, she had hidden from him.

            Natalie nestled in his arms, happily feeling the warm glow of his love fill her.  She had always been reluctant to enter into any long-term relationships because, as a coroner, she knew how fleeting life truly was.  Nick was the perfect solution to that because he was relatively invincible.  But it truly wasn't until now that she realized that vampires were all but invincible - especially from other vampires.  And they were a hundred times more dangerous to each other than a mortal to another mortal.

            Nire came back, relatively ignoring them, and eased herself down back in the same spot she had vacated before.  She was softly humming, not a happy tune.  A pile of clothes was set next to her, and she laid a sword and scabbard on top of the small pile.  Nick could see one at her waist, positioned for easy accessibility by her right hand.

            She began to sing quietly, under her breath.  Nick couldn't help but pay attention to the lyrics as he held Natalie's warm body close to him.

            "Rain falls angry on the tin roof/ As we lie awake in my bed/ You're my survival, you're my living proof/ My love is alive and not dead/ Tell me that we belong together/ Dress it up with the trappings of love. I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips/ Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above/ I've dropped out, burned up, fought my way back from the dead/ Tuned out, turned on, remembered the things you said/ I'll be your cryin' shoulder/ I'll be love suicide."

            She suddenly stopped singing, and raised her voice to reach Natalie.  "Do you have any painkillers?  Or at least Advil?"

            Natalie sighed and backed away from Nick.  She grabbed the pill bottle that held the painkillers she had prescribed herself, checking the label to make sure there weren't any special warnings.  Then she filled a glass of water and brought both over to Nire.

            "Here you go."

            Nire laughed evilly, tossing back a little pill.  "Oo, drugs.  *_Real* drugs.  Thankee sai."  She handed everything back and closed her eyes._

            Obviously, she wanted to be left alone, so Nick and Natalie obliged, going and sitting at the table.  Nick covered Natalie's hands with his own, rubbing his thumbs over the tops.

            "What's wrong, mon ange?" he asked quietly.

            "I… just a reminder that vampires aren't invincible." She sighed and brought his hands up to her forehead.  "Nothing important.'

            "It's important to me.  Anything that worries you is important to me."  He caressed her face until she met his eyes.  Never would he understand why something like that would make her ashamed of herself, but it did.

            Natalie leaned into his caress, meeting Nick's sympathetic eyes.  How could he be so understanding?  "Nick…"

            "I do my best not to anger people more powerful than me, Nat.  I'm not dying any time soon."

            Natalie quickly changed the subject.  Life was fleeting, even for vampires.  What about Urs, Screed, and Divia?  "On to more important things.  Where are we going to put them to sleep?"

            Nire piped up from her spot by the couch.  "If you can leave him here, I'll just sleep on the floor right here.  All I need is a blanket and a pillow."

            "The floor?" Natalie asked dubiously.  That sounded uncomfortable to her.

            Nire heaved herself up and came around to the other side of the couch, shrugging.  "I've always preferred sleeping on the ground to a mattress.  It's no biggie."

            Nick noticed the fingers on her right hand furiously working.  "What are you doing?" he asked her.

            Nire glanced down at her hand, and her fingers stopped moving.  "Air piano.  I'm either singing or playing an instrument every waking hour, so… this is less annoying than actually making noise."

            "You can play the real piano," Nick offered.

            Nire glanced at the gorgeous instrument.  "No way.  Really?"

            Nick squelched his misgivings.  She was obviously mature for her age.  She wouldn't break it.  "Sure.  Go ahead."

            Natalie grinned.  Nick must really like the girl if he was allowing her to touch his precious piano.  Nick could see by the reverent way Nire touched the antique that he hadn't made a mistake.  She expertly ran a few scales and arpeggios to get herself acquainted with the sound, and then launched into 'Speak Softly, Love'.  Nick was suitably impressed - for a mortal she had *_talent*._

            "Nick!  Snap out of it!"  He grinned sheepishly, turning to Natalie.  "I said, is she any good?" she murmured.

            "*_Very*," Nick replied as Nire stopped in the middle of the song and switched to Billy Joel's 'Pianoman'.  "Listen to her.  She knows what she's doing; there are few mistakes, and if she had the music in front of her, there would probably be none.  And, of course, the most important thing - she puts feeling into the pieces."  Nire changed songs in the middle again, now playing 'Let it Be'.  "Oh yeah, she's good."_

            He fell silent, making Natalie's grin widen.  He could tell that much after hearing her for such a short time?  A look of pure rapture filled his face, and Nire's.  Music had always easily distracted Nick, even when he was mortal.  And he had always said that he was a sucker for a live performance by a talented pianist.  Nire switched to 'Yesterday' before finishing the previous piece, then to a mournful tune Natalie didn't recognize.  She refrained from speaking to Nick, respecting his obvious wish to listen.  The irony of the situation suddenly struck her - she was second fiddle to a piano.

            Nire continued playing, but never once did she finish a piece.  It was beginning to get on Natalie's nerves.  She found that the longer she stayed at home, the shorter her fuse was.  And the fact that she doubted Nick would hear her if she spoke didn't help.

            "Do you know *_any_* full songs by heart?" she finally interrupted.

            Nire continued playing ('Annie Laurie'), but answered.  "No- Yes.  This'un and 'Marche Slav'.  I just have this thing against playing a song all the way through."

            She returned her attention to playing.  Nick smiled slightly as her fingers stumbled slightly.  He knew she had been about to begin another song, but stopped in deference to Natalie's implied request.  Then she launched directly into another one which, since she played it all the way though, Natalie assumed was 'Marche Slav'.

            "What about something happy?" Natalie requested.

            "It's still sound like a dirge.  I can't okay happy stuff when I'm feeling anything but."  She launched 'Moonlight Sonata' as she spoke.

            "Do you want the music?" Nick immediately asked.  Natalie rolled her eyes.

            "I still can't play it through, but sure," Nire acquiesced.

            Nick got up and placed the sheets before her.  He didn't need them anymore, but still kept them around.  They were originals, after all.  Nire sighed, playing mournfully and slow.

            "*_Why* hasn't he woken up yet?" she muttered to herself.  "Bastard.  If he gives up on me, I'll kill him.  Vampires *__aren't supposed to die*."_

            Natalie nodded slightly to that.  They weren't supposed to, but all too often, they did.  Nick had almost been killed multiple times.  She did not have to worry about him being shot because he was a cop, but she did have to worry about him being staked by other vampires.  It was not a fair tradeoff.

            As the mournful notes flowed throughout the room, a discordant chord jangled out as Nire's fingers tripped over the ivory and ebony.  She corrected the passage, then laughed joyfully.

            "Oh that little shithead!" she exclaimed happily, a new lilt in her music.

            "What?" Nick asked, noticing the happy tone.  She played what she felt, much as he did.

            "He's going to be fine."  Nire tapped the side of her head.  "He was just making fun of me 'cause I always screw up that part."

            Natalie refrained from commenting on the impossibility of that.  Vampires were impossible, as was the existence of elves.  And yet they were both here in the room with her.  Meeting Nick had rocked her purely scientific world.  Although she minded at first, now she couldn't be more glad.

            When Nire stood up and pulled the cover of the keyboard down, Natalie realized she had to have been using her left arm.  "Your arm…"

            "Painkillers are a miracle cure," Nire joked as she went back over to the couch and sat against its front again.  " 'Sides, if I keep my upper arm tight against my side, I only have to move the lower half."  She demonstrated quickly while Natalie could still see her, waving it back and forth, but rotating it at the elbow.

            Nick brought Natalie's fingers to his mouth, giving them feather-kisses.  He realized that the music had drawn his attention from Natalie, almost in the middle of a conversation.  And, he knew that he had an unfortunate habit of doing that.  Natalie smiled gently, knowing that it was an apology.  He looked at her sheepishly above her fingertips with his boyish eyes.  How could she resist that charm?

            "Nick…" she whispered, reaching up to touch his face.

            "What?" he asked after a moment, leaning in to her caress.

            Natalie sighed.  "Nothing.  Never mind."

            "I don't mean to interrupt," Nire interrupted, "but can I take the needle out?  Number one, he's not from Earth, so it'd freak him out.  Second of all, the last needle stuck in him filled him with extract of garlic.  You can see my point."

            Natalie pushed herself away from the table and stood up.  "I'll do it."

            Nire stroked the vampire-elf's jaw line, whispering lovingly to him.  "Everything's going to be all right, mon ange.  We pulled through, as usual.  You're going to wake up, and we'll all be okay."

            "Of course it will," Natalie muttered.  "He was talking to you."  She didn't think the teen would be able to hear her.

            "He's dreaming.  He wasn't consciously talking *_to_* me, I just picked it up from his mind.  Haven't you ever had the sound of your alarm clock enter into your dream as a part of it?  But if he's dreaming, he'll wake soon."  Nire smiled smugly.  "See?  He's even twitching a little."  _What do you need me to do?  This? _

            Natalie's head jerked around, looking for the source of the voice before realizing it truly was in her head.  "How did you do that?"

            "Practice and talent."  Nire closed her eyes again.  "There are things in these worlds you could never understand scientifically, so don't try.  But telepathy works 'cause of an enlarged something-or-other lobe in the brain.  The bigger the lobe, the more powerful a telepath.  All humans have the potential - it's one of the repressed talents of our species.  It used to be the work of the devil, according to the Church.  Now, everyone thinks it's impossible, therefore it is.  It's all psychological.  Go figure."

            Nick came and stood next to Natalie, putting a hand on her back.  She was in a bad mood, and he didn't know why.  Well, no.  He knew it was probably something he did, and there were a list of things she could be angry about.  He just wasn't sure which action it was.  He would have some major apologizing to do, once he found out why she was suddenly in such foul humor.  Letting his love flow through their bloodlink, he hoped it would begin to make amends.

            Natalie fought back a roll of her eyes.  Typical Nick - he assumed her bad mood was somehow his fault.  Of course, it usually was.  This time, however, it was cabin fever, and the feeling that her home was becoming a hotel.  Plus, the attitude of Nire was suddenly rubbing her the wrong way and she was PMSing.  Not a good combination.

            Her eyes still closed, Nire asked, "Are you just going to stand there and stare at us?  'Cause, let me tell you, that makes me *_really_* nervous."

            "Sorry," Nick apologized once more.  "It's just that…"

            "Just that the two of us are actually sitting in your living room?" Nire finished for him.  Nick nodded at her assessment.  "Good gods, man!  It's not like we saved your life like we did for Vachon!  Get a grip!"

            Natalie was surprised to find that she agreed with Nire on that point.  All the girl had done was point out something that really had been obvious.  At least Nick had the good sense to look sheepish and turn away with her.  As he took her back to the kitchen, to cuddle with her for a bit, Nire began to sing again, so softly that only his ears could pick it up.

            "I'm sailing away/ Set an open course/ For the virgin sea/ I've got to be free/ Free to face the life/ That's ahead of me/ On board I'm the captain/ So climb aboard/ We'll search for tomorrow/ On every shore/ And I'll try/ Oh Lord I'll try/ To carry on/ I look to the sea/ Reflections in the waves/ Spark my memory/ Some happy some sad/ I think of childhood friends/ And the dreams we had/ We live happily forever/ So the story goes/ But somehow we missed out/ On that pot of gold/ But we'll try the bet that we can/ To carry on…"

            Nick was keeping Natalie close to him, holding her tight.  She happily melted into his body; perhaps this was all she needed.  Everything always seemed to happen at once for her.  There would be a clump of lost of action, then there would be a period where nothing interesting happened, then there would be a clump of action again.  That was how her life had always gone.  It had gotten to her before; it would get to her again.

            "Why am I in the doghouse this time?" he asked.  Last time, she felt like he was using her.  Was he doing it again?  But they had pretty much stopped trying to treat him, since nothing they were doing was working.

            "Nothing," Natalie replied, kissing him lightly.  "Cabin fever, nothing more.  It's nothing personal."

            Nick could feel the truth of her statement.  Greatly relieved, he nuzzled her neck happily.  Had his arms not been holding her close, he could have been fingering the small lump in his pocket, pondering it speculatively.

            A small commotion of noise came from over on the couch.  Nick broke away slightly from Natalie to see what it was.  Jander tossed and turned, making small whimpering noises, while Nire haled his hand, muttering soothingly.

            "Nightmare," she informed them.  "He's gonna wake up soon.  Got any straight blood I can keep right here for when he does?"

            "Sure."  Nick got her some quickly, wanting to go back to Natalie's warm body.  "Ah, you might not want to be around when he wakes up.  In fact, Nat…"

            She just gave him a look that said 'Don't even think about it'.  As usually, he did not try to argue.  It was, after all, pointless.  When had he ever won?  Still, he went back to the kitchen and wrapped his arms around her from the back, resting his chin on her shoulder.  At least he could keep her in the kitchen.  Nick knew what it was like the wake up after being severely injured ("What are you?" "I'm dead").  Jander was going to be starving, and with a warm source of blood so close to him, that was what he would go for.  There would be nothing controlled about it.  It had taken Nick every ounce of willpower he had not to go after Natalie that first night, and go for the blood units in the refrigerator.

            But he wasn't going to argue.  He didn't know why, he didn't know how, but somehow he knew hat nothing he said would change Nire's mind.  She was a smart girl - she had a blood bottle right next to her.  He would guess that she really did know what she was doing - it looked as though both had experience with this ("If you die on me again…").

            Jander's tossing and mumblings were growing more jerky, more frightened.  Real Latin phrases began appearing in the midst of incoherent mumblings.  "//No… leave… don't follow… you promised… alone…\\"

            Nick could hear Nire's mutterings more clearly as they grew more reassuring.  "//It's okay, mon ange.  It's just a nightmare, like usual.  I made it out - I made it out with you.  Wake up, baby, mon ange.  Wake up and see for yourself.  It's just a nightmare like we have every night.  We're both okay. \\"

            Natalie glanced at him, mouthing, "What are they saying?"

            Nick shrugged, touching his forehead to hers.  "Doesn't matter - it's not meant to be understood by us."

            Jander got louder, more violent on the couch.  "//No… let her go… leave her alone… not part of… deal… don't… don't touch her… no… \\" His voice rose in a strangled scream of anguish as he flew into an upright position.  "Nire!" Silver eyes searched the room frantically, not registering anything.

            "Hey, hey."  Gentle hands turned his face so he could see Nire.  Relief immediately washed over his face.  "I'm right here, mon ange.  I'm okay."

            A thin-boned bronze hand reached out, hovering near her face.  The disbelief was evident in every piece of his body.  Suddenly, he tense, the set of his lithe frame filled with panic.  A strangled command came forth from his throat.

            "Get away, M'ija…"

            Natalie watched in horror as his eyes flamed saffron and he grabbed her throat, biting down and sucking at the sweet nectar within.  One hand held her head and hair to the side; the other clamped her left arm down like a vise.  Immediately, the two lovers moved to help.

            Before they could even get a step, a voice thundered through their conscious.  _No!!  Stay away!! _

            They both immediately froze.  A look of complete ecstasy had filled Nire's face.  Natalie grinned - she couldn't help it.  She knew how the girl felt - and she was obviously in love with the vampire.  If Jander didn't stop soon, Nick was going to intervene.  He didn't want the girl to get hurt if he could help it.  But he knew that live blood would be more healing than the bottled stuff.  And Nire obviously didn't mind.

            With a strangled scream of derision, Jander tore his head back and thrust Nire away from him.  She flew backwards with an audible pop and a shriek of pain.  As Natalie rushed over to check on her, Jander curled himself into a tight, shaking ball.

            "Oh my gods, oh my gods ohmygods.  Mystra Mielikki Ao, tell me one of you can fix it."  Nire was hyperventilating, her left arm clearly popped out of its socket, but not crying.

            "Nick," said Natalie.  She knew how to pop the shoulder back in, but she wasn't strong enough.

            Nick hesitated slightly.  "Don't even start," Nire gasped out.  "Just fix it.  Fix it fix it fix it."  Tears of pain had sprung into her eyes, even though she did not let them spill over.

            Nick hesitantly gripped her arm and her collarbone.  "Do it," she growled suddenly.  With a quick twist and tug, her dislocated shoulder popped back in.  Nire groaned in pain, then rotated her shoulder a couple times.  It hurt, as did the slash on her back, but it'd do.

            "I'm gonna frelling kill him," Nire muttered, stalking (as best she could with her limp) angrily back to the couch.

            "It's not his fault," Nick tried to reason.  He understood what the vampire must have felt like, and could sympathize with the reaction.

            "Bull frelling dren," she responded, then turned her attention to the vampire elf on the couch.  He was still huddled in a shaking ball, his face buried in his knees.  Nick could smell fresh blood; blood that smelled different from the French vanilla and almonds of Nire, and assumed it was bloodtears.

            "Cry all you want, you fucking bastard," Nire swore at the poor vampire.  "Go ahead - feel sorry for yourself.  What's the rule?  What's the *_fucking_* rule?  Do whatever you want to my right side.  That side means dren to me - it never gets hurt.  But *_don't' touch the left side*!  You know, feed from me all you want.  I don't care.  Just *_don't dislocate_* the shoulder!"  Nire paused in her rage-filled yelling, regarding Jander silently._

            "Nire…" Natalie tried quietly.

            "Yeah, I know.  I'm sorry, mon ange.  Come on."  Suddenly, her voice was cajoling and gently.  She bent down and picked up the green wine bottle of blood that sat on the floor.  "Drink this, baby, okay?  Please?  I'm sorry - I had no right to yell at you.  Please drink it?"

            Jander merely clung tighter to himself.  Nire's light fingers tripped gently down his wiry frame, stroking and petting.  "Please, Jander.  I'm begging you.  Drink and get better.  Please."  Her fingers played through his wheat-gold locks.

            It was to no avail.  It almost seemed as though waves of self-revulsion were rolling off the elven vampire to affect everyone near him.  After a few moments, Nire sighed and motioned Nick over.  He came and stood next to her, waiting to find out what she wanted him to do.

            Nire sniffed the open neck of the bottle appreciatively.  "Mm, this smells *_so_* good.  It's making my stomach growl.  Wow.  Doesn't it smell good, Nick?"

            Nick smiled slightly, understanding his role.  "It smells delicious.  Yum.  I wish I could have some."

            Nire handed him the bottle.  "Take a sip," she muttered.

            Nick took half a mouthful, then licked his lips appreciatively.  "Mm.  Nice and fresh - one of the better vintages."

            Nire grinned at him and took the bottle back, wafting the smell over to Jander.  "It's a shame that it's all going to go to waste.  Too bad…" She waved the bottle back and forth in front of the ball of undead flesh.

            Nick could visible see the other vampire's control weakening.  A fine-boned bronze hand shot out and roughly grabbed the bottle from Nire's fingers.  He sat up, chugging it down, his bronze face stained with red tear tracks.  As he finished, his flaming saffron eyes alighted on Natalie, and he attempted to lunge up.  Before Nick could react, Nire slammed him back with her right arm across his chest and shoved the second bottle into his hand.  Nick had a third waiting as Jander drained that one dry.  Nire quickly took it and shoved it into his hand.  He was looking better already.

            Under her breath, Nire muttered, "Good gods, mon ange, you're as bad as Amariyah when she doesn't want to eat but one of us makes her."

            Halfway through that third bottle of blood, Jander began to slow down, and he set it on the floor with an inch left at the bottom.  As soon as he did that, he covered his face with his hands, his elbows on his knees, sobs wracking his body.  Nire turned and sat next to him, putting an arm around his shoulders and pulling him to lean on her.  At first, he resisted, but soon, he was sobbing on her shoulder.

            Nick glanced at Natalie.  Due to the fact that this floor of the loft was one big room, there was nowhere that they could go to give the two refugees some privacy.  There might be the semblance of it if they retired to the kitchen, but Nick wasn't to keen on the idea of leaving Nire 'alone' with the recently starved vampire.  Still, they drew back slightly to behind the couch.

            Nire caressed Jander's body as best she could, ignoring the pain in her left shoulder, attempting to comfort his sobs.  He was gibbering in Latin, clinging tightly to the girl.

            "//I almost killed you.  I could have killed you.  I almost got you killed.  I almost got everyone killed.  Oh my gods, how can you stand to be near me?  It's my fault that you're hurt.  Oh my gods, I fed off you.  I am evil incarnate, I am lower than the worms.  I should just leave, should stake myself. \\"

            Nire was having a bit of difficulty deciphering the words between the sobs, but she caught that last one right away.  "//Don't you *_dare_* leave.  Don't you *_dare* abandon us again.  And if you kill yourself… You're father in all but blood to some of those kids.  How am I supposed to explain to them that they've lost *_another_* parent?  Stop being so frelling selfish."_

            Nire allowed him to sob unchecked for a few minutes.  Finally, after tilting her head back and glancing at Nick and Natalie, she pried Jander's head away from her shoulder so he was looking at her.  "As much as I would love to hold you as you cry, mon ange, you're wasting precious blood."  She quickly kissed off his tears and kissed his eyelids.  "For my sake?  So I don't sit here and worry?"

            Jander nodded, his silver eyes fixed on the floor, his head hanging in shame.  Natalie felt like a voyeur, watching the two.  But she couldn't turn away.  Nire gently kissed Jander's cheek, stroking his fine hair.

            "Mon ange, //you need to sleep and get better, okay?  You're still weak.  Lie down again, baby. \\"

            Natalie wished she could understand the girl.  By the look on Nick's face, he could.  Jander lay back down as Nire stood up.

            His voice was filled with panic as he begged.  "//Don't leave me.  Please don't leave me. \\"

            Nire laughed, speaking in English again.  "I'm not.  Don't worry, I'm just sitting down on the floor."  She took his golden hand in hers, smiling as it immediately locked around hers.

            Natalie nudged Nick and made him follow her to the kitchen.  He happily followed her, leaning against the counter as she began going through the refrigerator for lunch.  This was going to be fun if Nire and Jander stayed much longer.

            "Do you want any lunch?" Natalie asked Nire softly.

            "Nah, I'm good," she responded tiredly.  After a few minutes, she carefully separated her hand from Jander's and limped to join them in the kitchen.  "Can I have a glass of water or something?"

            "Sure."  Nick got a glass down from the cabinet above him and filled it in the sink, handing it to her.

            Nire stared at it for a moment, as if she suddenly regretted asking for it.  "Please don't be chlorine water," she muttered before greedily downing the glass.

            "Chlorine water?" Natalie questioned for lack of anything better to say.

            "Yeah.  My town's got normal water, but places like Whitinsville and Worcester," which she pronounced 'Woosta', "the water there tastes like they added lots of chlorine to it."

            There was an uncomfortable silence for a while.  Finally, in an amused tone of voice, Nire said, "Ah yes, the silence of a group of people thrown together for no reason.  To save us all the discomfort and embarrassment, can I watch TV or something?"

            Natalie nodded, relieved.  Nire had already sighted the remote on the back of the couch and made a bobbing beeline for it.  As she started flipping through channels, Natalie and Nick sat down at the kitchen table.  Sound carried well in the loft, so Nire could be heard humming softly from her spot on the floor as she watched - and Natalie had to grin slightly at this - 'Ren and Stimpy'.

            Her grin quickly faded, however, as she muttered, "Jesus, I feel like this place is turning into a hotel."

            "Well I hope, when you start kicking people out, I'm allowed to stay," Nick said, trying to lighten the mood.

            Natalie laughed slightly - how could she not, looking at him.  He was so sweet.  "Maybe we could as Abel to sleep on the couch again for a few nights," she mused softly.

            "Nat," Nick grinned and covered her hands with his.  Never would he get enough of her skin on his.  "Stop thinking about it.  If she says she wants to sleep on the floor, then she does.  That's not the type of person who would say something and not mean it."

            "How do you know?" she asked skeptically.

            A confused look passed over Nick's face.  "I… I don't know.  I just do… But it would be easier just to leave Jander there, anyway.  He's not going to be able to walk far for a while."

            "You sound as though you talk from experience," Natalie said curiously, hoping he would share.

            "Yeah… Just let it go, Nat."

            Natalie sighed.  She didn't care anymore.  She wanted to back to *_work* so she wasn't bored anymore.  She wanted the trial to have begun and be done and over with so she didn't have this constant sense of dread hanging over her.  No, better yet, she wanted to go back in time and prevent everything from happening._

            Nick patiently waited for the myriad of emotions to stop flowing through Natalie's features.  He could sympathize with her obvious thoughts.  She had it easy with the whole ordeal so far - everyone had managed to keep her name from the papers, and the head ME had been 'sent' to a conference in the states.  But this could not last much longer.

            It was as if his thoughts, her thoughts, were a trigger.  'Ren and Stimpy' ended, and Nire changed the channel to some news station.  Speak of the Devil, and he will appear.

            "In a recent development on the serial rapist-murderer case, and undisclosed source revealed the name of the only surviving victim.  Natalie Lambert, head medical examiner for the Toronto police department, was rescued a little more than two weeks ago from the clutched of the killer.  The youngest women ever to be appointed-"

            The channel was changed with an excited squeal of "Pinky 'n' th' Brain!" from Nire.

            Natalie dropped her head into her hands.  "Wonderful.  Just wonderful.  Can my life *_get* any better?"_

            "Oh Nat," Nick murmured, scooting around to another chair so he was closer to her.

            "When's the trial?" she muttered.  "When is this all going to be over with?"

            "I don't know," he said sadly.  In two weeks, I think."

            She grumbled to herself unhappily.  Finally muttering coherently, "Chocolate.  I need chocolate."

            Nick grinned and kissed her, getting up.  He opened the cupboard under the sink and reached way to the back, behind the cleaners Natalie had put under there.  She looked at him dubiously - hadn't she broken him of the habit of putting things under there?  But she had to laugh as he grinned triumphantly and pulled a bag of Hershey's Kisses from the murky depths.__

            "I knew you wouldn't find them under there," he said proudly, handing them to her.  "Chocolate."

            His face was so earnest, so eager to please, that she didn't have the heart to tell him that she was thinking more along the lines of a double mocha latte than chocolate candy.  After all, what could be better than chocolate and coffee together?  But it was the thought that counted.

            "I love you Nick," she told him as she opened the bag, taking out the first foil-covered candy.

~~~~{@

            Abel quaked in his car in the garage.  He had been able to feel it almost all night. Even Jack had mention how jumpy he seemed.  But what else could he do?  How else was he supposed to react?  The power rolling off the city…

            The power rolled off the city, in a new way.  It wasn't the usual power that should be felt, oh no.  This was different, stronger.  It tugged at him, tried to draw him to the center of the outpouring.  The incessant pull gnawed at his belly and tingled down his limbs.  However, just as he knew everyone else was doing, he nervously ignored it.  Unlike them, he had a higher stake in ignoring the call.

            Five days.  He only had five days.  It was like a countdown to his death.  In fact, it quite possibly was.  Maybe if he found the source of this sudden upwelling of power…

            When Jack came to relive him promptly at half past one, Abel was no closer to a decision.  All he could do was pray that whatever was at the nexus of the swell would still be there tomorrow.  He didn't want to wait, but he was afraid to go right then.

            As he drove back to the loft, his problem was solved.  The feeling grew strong and stronger as he neared his temporary home.  And his nervousness grew proportionally.  He now sat in his parked car, quivering with fear.  The source of the power was at the loft.  Whatever it was, it was there.  Was it waiting for him?

            Tingles of power ran through his body and buzzed through his head.  He was trying to work up the nerve to go upstairs.  There was no way he could go up there this frightened.  So what that whatever the source of this power was could be just like the rest of them?  Who cared if it almost definitely was?

            Abel took a deep breath and slumped back into his seat.  He was screwed.


	16. It Allll Makes Sense Now

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 16/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  Any sort of 'pard' stuff is stolen from Laurell K. Hamilton's Anita Blake series.

**Chapter Sixteen**

            Nire was still glued by the couch when the lift started up.  Natalie had gone to start a load of laundry, and Nick was leaning against the counter in the kitchen, drinking his lunch.  He knew that Abel had been sitting downstairs for a while, absolutely terrified of something.  But since he was the only one down there, Nick knew to leave him alone.  After all, when was Abel not afraid of something?

            Abel's eyes skittered nervously around the room as he exited the lift, the bulky door grumbling shut behind him.  His eyes and ears quickly located everyone as his heart fluttered in his chest.  There was Nick, over in the kitchen, feeding from a Metro Homicide mug.  His eyes were distant, either deep in thought or back in memories.  The sounds of the washing machine starting and Natalie finishing up in the laundry room reached Abel's keen ears.

            Neither of those things were what made his heart race like a jackrabbit.  After all, how many times had he come back from the video store to be greeted by a similar scene?  No, it was the fact that the call he had been able to feel almost all night, the roiling power, as emanating from the vicinity of the couch.  He knew there where two people there, two bodies from who knows where.  Since only one singing heart could be heard that wasn't familiar to him, he assumed the one body was one of the undead.  Which left the other body to be the source.

            Within five seconds of his entrance, Nire popped her head around the edge of the black leather couch.  Instinct told him that she was it.  Nick's dazed look disappeared as Abel's breath caught a little in his throat out of fear.

            "Hey kitty kat," she said in a tone as if she were speaking to an actual cat, but with a much gentler note in the background.  "What's your name?"

            Natalie came out of the laundry room, assuming Nire as talking to Sydney.  The gray furball had yet to make his appearance - he had been asleep somewhere upstairs for the entire night.

            Needless to say, she was surprised when the young man answered in a timid, trembling voice, "Abel."

            "Hi Abel.  I'm Nire."  She got up and limped around the couch so she was leaning against the back.  Abel visibly flinched as she moved, scared to death of her.  He knew he was supposed to go greet her, but with Nick and Natalie confusedly watching… Which was more imperative?  He didn't know - they had never bothered to teach him.  His eyes nervously flicked between Nire and Nick and Natalie.

            Nick was about to intervene somehow.  Nire obviously didn't know Abel, and yet the young man was terrified of her.  She wasn't making things any better, either.  But Nire spoke again before he could move.

            "What's the matter?" she asked, looking a bit confused.  "He's a vampire and she's living with a vampire, so- " A light suddenly dawned on her face and in her eyes.  "Oh.  You're one of *_those* kinds of kitty kat."_

            The smell of the blood on her clothes was going to drive him mad.  His control was tenuous as it was, and he could feel the roiling within him.  What was he supposed to do?  Had that been meant as a reassurance or a threat?  If he turned and ran right now, would she find him and kill him?

            "Where's your pard, kitty kat?" Nire's voice was gentle and cajoling, meant to be as non-threatening as possible.

            Abel's tongue flicked out and nervously licked his lips.  Maybe it would be better to just belong to someone again.  It couldn't be as bad as before.  "I don't have one," he finally said, his soft tones filled with fear.

            "You don't?" Nire's eyes were suddenly sharp.  "How long?"

            "Five days," he whispered miserably.  His head dropped so he was looking at the floor, trying to force back the tears in his eyes.

            "Jesus Christ!  What were you going to do?" she exclaimed.

            Abel flinched back half a step.  Nick opened his mouth to come to the young man's rescue, but Nire quickly caught his eye and shook her head in a small motion.  It would not have mattered, but for the fact that her face begged him to keep his trap shut and her eyes screamed that she knew what she was doing.

            "I don't know," Abel whimpered.  Why weren't Nick and Natalie helping him?  Unless…

            Nire silently mouthed the number of days he had said, her eyes growing wide.  Natalie was trying to figure out what she had meant by the question in the first place, and Abel's answer.  Nick's head jerked up and he sniffed the air when, with no warning, the scent of blood was gone, completely gone.  One moment, he could smell the fluid oozing from Nire's wounds, the next, he couldn't.  What was it?  How had that happened?

            Abel could have cried in relief when the scent of blood disappeared.  The roil within him calmed almost immediately.  Too, the compelling call was gone.  The tingle and buzz remained; but the need of the summons was gone.

            "I'm sorry, kitty kat.  I didn't even think of that," Nire apologized.  "One more question, and then I'll stop bugging you, 'kay?  All I need to know is if there's a Nimir-Ra, or someone like that who I should talk to."

            Abel didn't dare peek up from the spot he was studying on the floor.  She was not going to like the only answer he had, but there was no way he could avoid giving it.  "I don't know."

            She didn't strike out as he had expected.  Instead, she said gently, "Okay, thanks.  I'm done bothering you now."

            He eyed her cautiously for a moment.  Was she really done?  Was he going to get away that easily?  Or were there going to be repercussions later?  Oh, God, he didn't care anymore.  Carefully, he edged around her and over to the stairs, then fled up to his room.

            As soon as Nick heard the door close, he glared at Nire, as did Natalie.  "What the *_hell*-" he growled._

            "Oh, do shut up," Nire said, quite but forcefully.  It was enough to have Nick's mouth snap closed.  "I know more than you think.  Severely abused, probably raped on a daily basis since childhood, and there's more to the story that there's no way you could know."

            "Then do enlighten us," Natalie said icily.

            "No," Nire flatly refused.  "If he wanted you to know, he'd 'a told you.  And if you start bugging him about it…" Nire drifted off and limped back around the couch to sit down, leaving the unspoken threat hanging in the air.  Natalie could hear her muttering, "If I ever get my hands on any of the bastards that hurt that poor boy, I'll make them pay.  I'll make them pay an infinite number of times."

            Natalie knew the feeling well.  She nudged Nick gently to get his attention and muttered, "Leave her alone."

            "Damn right, leave me alone," Nire spoke up.  "If you don't want a turf war breaking out in the middle of Toronto, I had to get that information out of him."

            "Turf war?" popped out of Nick's mouth.

            "No, he wasn't part of a gang.  Different kind of turf war."

            Natalie kissed Nick's cheek.  "I'm going upstairs.  Go ahead and argue with her, but you're going to lose."

            She left the two of them there and went up to check on Abel.  Even as she walked down the hall and knocked on the young man's bedroom door, she could hear Nick arguing and Nire telling him to shut up because she was trying to learn how to achieve world domination.  The girl had settled right in once Jander had gone back to sleep.

            "Can I come in, honey?" she asked as she knocked.

            "Uh huh."

            She opened the door and quietly shut it behind her.  Abel was sitting on his bed, his legs crossed, staring at nothing.  As the door clicked, he flinched and glanced quickly at her.  She made a mental note as she sat down in the chair that they *_had* to get out soon and find actual furniture for the room._

            "Are you okay, honey?" she asked him gently.

            He nodded quickly, nervously.  Now she was going to start asking questions.  Questions he didn't want to answer.  Although he had heard Nire warning them to leave him alone, why would they listen?  Why would Nire even bother backing up her threat?  He wasn't hers - he didn't belong to anyone anymore.  The worst part was, he wasn't so sure that being alone was such a good thing.

            "Are you sure?  You ran up here pretty fast."  Abel's immediate reaction to the innocent question was to draw up his knees to his chest in a protective gesture.

            "I'm sorry," he whimpered unhappily.

            "Hey, it's okay," she quickly reassured him.  "I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

            He nodded quickly.  Sure, he was okay.  Relatively okay.  Why couldn't he belong to someone without the pain involved?  They had told him he couldn't survive on his own.  Apparently, they were right.  How come the more powerful, the more the pain?  Why was that how it always was?  He would *_have* to go to them, because, with the amount of power rolling off Nire…_

            "Abel, honey, what's really wrong?" Natalie was worried by the look on his face.  He looked like he was about to burst into tears, but was too afraid to.

            He peered at her from above his knees.  "Nothing.  Really.  I'm fine."

            Natalie knew when not to press him.  But she would try to get Nire and Jander out as soon as possible.  Abel was obviously terrified of Nire, but for no discernable reason.  And the whole kitty kat thing - they could know each other.  But that didn't seem to be it.

            Abel watched her, breathing shallowly.  The other shoe had to drop soon, hadn't it?  Tonight was the night his run of good luck ended.  Why bother resisting?  It was futile.  All that ever did was get him more pain.  If he gave up now, it might not be as bad.

            Natalie sighed.  She had gotten Abel to talk to her a little bit more.  It was nothing much, not more beyond longer sentences, but at least it was something.  Now, he had returned to fearful two-word sentences.  Frustrating, to say the least.

            "You know you can talk to me and Nick, right honey?" she tried to reassure him.

            He nodded slightly, and Natalie sighed again.  Oh yeah, he believed her.  Almost as much as if she had sworn that Santa Clause was real.  What else was she supposed to do or say?  She wasn't a psychologist; she didn't know what to say.  There was nothing left to do but go back downstairs.  As she stood and went to the door, Abel flinched and shrank away from her.  Something he hadn't done for two or so days.

            "I'll see you if you venture downstairs again, otherwise, good night, sweet dreams."

            " 'Night," he whispered as she left.

            Natalie paused at the top of the stairs to determine the state of the argument downstairs.  Surprisingly, everything was quiet.  Nire was still on the floor in front of the couch, and now Nick was in his chair.  Natalie went down the stairs and leaned over the back of it, playing with his blonde hair.

            "Who won?" she asked jokingly, even though she was seriously angry with the girl.

            "I did," Nire immediately said and pointed at Nick.  "He quit arguing first."

            "Did not," Nick quickly said.  "You started repeating yourself."

            Natalie sighed and rolled her eyes.  Wonderful.  They may have made their peace, but now she had to deal with children.  She was too tired to deal with that right now.  Much too tired.

~~~~{@

            The soft blue glow of the digital watch made shadows on Abel's face as he checked what time it was.  He made a small unhappy noise - it was only noon.  He had heard Natalie and Nick go to bed three hours ago, and Nire turn off the TV an hour after that.  And still he sat on the mattress that was his bed, wide-awake.

            Opening the shades might be a good thing, since he obviously wasn't going to sleep.  The thick, heavy shades kept it pitch black in the room, even during the brightest part of the day.  Not that it mattered - before, he had to be able to sleep when he could, no matter how bright the light.

            What had Natalie done for him last time he couldn't sleep?  Warmed up some milk in the microwave, was it?  Maybe if he was really quiet, he could sneak downstairs and do that without waking anyone up.  The microwave wasn't that loud.  Or maybe he could put it on a burner for a few seconds.  That worked the same for most things.

            The decision quickly made for once, he dropped his feet lightly on the floor and silently walked to the door, easing it open.  There were no sounds of movement from either floor.  Deciding it to be safe, he crept down the hall and down the stairs.  Too late, he realized that Nire was not asleep, merely not watching TV anymore, and she was watching him.

            He was already off the last step, and no one was around but he, Nire, and the unconscious nosferatu.  Immediately, without hesitation for fear of the serious consequences because of before, he dropped to his hands and knees and crawled forward.  His head was bent downs submissively, and his crawl was that of a clumsy human, not the almost feline slink Natalie had seen.

            "I'm sorry," he repeated over and over under his breath.  When he reached Nire's side, he licked her hand.  Then he cringed away from her, awaiting the strike that was sure to come.

            Instead, she said in a soft, gently voice, "It's okay, kitty kat.  I'm not big on official greetings - it freaks out the humans too much."

            Still, he trembled, waiting.  She couldn't be serious.  That would be too good to be true.  As soon as he relaxed, she would do something, cause some kind of pain.  It was all he knew, all he had been taught since he was but a babe.  The more powerful, the more it would hurt.

            "I'm serious, chico.  C'mon, get up.  Stop cringing there like I'm going to beast the shit out of you."  She smiled reassuringly.

            Warily, watching her body language closely, he stood.  But still he cringed, waiting.  Every line of his body screamed 'don't hurt me' so loudly that Nire wondered how anyone could cause the young man pain.

            She tilted her head back and stared at the high ceiling.  "So, you can't sleep either, ey?"

            Abel nodded quickly, trembling underneath his thin T-shirt.  Was she done with him?  Was that it for now?  She wasn't talking to him, wasn't looking at him.  Did that mean he had been dismissed?  Or maybe she wanted him to think that so when he moved away…

            Nire cracked an eye open.  "You're one frightened kitty kat.  Did you come down for a glass of warm milk?"  He nodded again.  "That actually sounds relatively good," she mused, pushing herself to her feet.

            He watched warily as she limped out to the kitchen still in jeans and a T-shirt.  After a moment's hesitation, he followed her, with a fatalistic attitude.  Although he wondered why she limped so badly, he would never ask.  The soft sounds of Nire humming under her breath reached his ears as she grabbed down two glasses.

            "One for you, one for me," she said gently, handing him a glass.  He gripped it tightly so he wouldn't drop it.

            The harsh light from the refrigerator spread into the dark room, briefly blinding Abel.  A moment of panic gripped him because he couldn't see Nire and he instinctively flinched away from the light, whimpering.

            Nire swore violently, quickly grabbing out the milk and shutting the door.  "There should be *_laws* against making lights that bright."_

            As Nire thunked the jug of milk on the counter beside her glass, the bright spots faded from Abel's eyes.  For a long moment, the girl stared speculatively at the milk, then made a face.

            "Screw that," she muttered, grabbing her glass and moving to the sink.  "There you go, kitty kat."  Abel watched nervously as she filled her glass with water and took a long pull, then dumped the rest out.  With interest, he watched as she pulled a small silver flask from her back pocket and took a swig.

            "What's that?" he asked quietly before he could think better of it, and flinched away.

            "Stuff," she answered.  "It's… It keeps me awake.  Sometimes, being awake all night is preferable to the nightmares."  She grinned wryly.  "Or two nights, or a week."

            Abel could identify with that statement.  He filled his glass and put the milk back, squinting against the glare.  Then he stood in front of the microwave for a few minutes, trying to figure out how long to put it in for.  He glanced at Nire a couple times, hoping she would notice his predicament and help.  He didn't want to wake up Nick or Natalie by having the microwave keep beeping.  Nire finally glanced at him.

            "Try two minutes, chico, but keep an eye on it."  She grinned.  "I don't really know - I'm 'llergic to milk, so I don't have much occasion to warm it up."

            When the milk came out, it was nice and warm, but not too hot.  Abel sipped at it, watching Nire closely.  She was studying him no less intensely.  It was making him extremely nervous.

            "I'm going to start being nosy again, kitty kat," she finally said, " 'cause that's my job when I meet a stray."

            He nodded, his fear escalating.  If she didn't like his answers, what would she do?  And he couldn't lie because she would know.  He was damned if he did, damned if he didn't.

            "When?" she asked, assuming he would understand what she meant.

            "When I was five."  He prayed he had gotten the intent of her question right.

            Her eyes widened perceptibly.  "They've been beating on you since you were a babe, ey?  So, you're not part of a pard, you don't know if there's some kind of leader, but there are other wereleopards, right?"

            He nodded again, his eyes flickering about the room.  On his fingers, he tried to count how many there were.  He did not know them by name, but by what they did to him when Kane loaned him out.

            Quickly, Nire said, "I don't need names or numbers, kitty kat.  Just that there are some."

            He flinched as she moved around the table and hopped up on the edge.  As she swung her feet, he cringed away from her, his breath hitching in his throat.  Sliding along the counter edge, he instinctively moved away from her and her swinging feet.

            "Easy, kitty kat.  I just can't stand up for that long."  She waited a few seconds for him to calm down a little, then continued.  "So what were you planning on doing when the full moon came?"  The gentle caring in her voice softened the harshness of the question.

            Abel set down his glass and hugged his arms around his body, shivering slightly.  He wasn't cold.  "I don't know," he whispered miserably.  That had never been a good answer, in his experience, but it was all he had.

            "Not even a single thought?" Nire questioned quietly.  "Chico, you do realize that you have to figure out something, right?  It's never good to be pardless and alone at that time of the month."

            Abel nodded, fighting back tears.  What was there for him to do?  He had no options left, and Nire sounded suspiciously like she was telling him to go back to them.  His breathing came in short gasps of fear as he considered what was going to happen to him if he let them get their hands on him once more.  Whatever she offered would be better than going back, or being alone.  At least, if he gave up to her and her awesome power right now, it was possible she would save him for herself.  She wouldn't pass him around.  And he would belong to someone again.  The pain would be worth it, no matter how severe.  They had been right - wereleopards could not survive on their own.

            "Are you…" he began tremulously, bracing himself, but was afraid to continue.  He had to make sure, didn't he?

            "I am Nimir-Ra of the Icebreaker pard."  She smiled gently at him.  "That's what you wanted to make sure of, right?"

            He nodded, terrified, wanting nothing more than to flee back upstairs right now.  Forget about everything else.  Through careless talk because they did not think he was listening or understood, he had gathered a few tidbits about the pard.  For instance, he knew that the Nimir-Ra was the alpha member of the pard, the leopard queen.  But he didn't know how he, as the lowest of the wereleopards in the area, should have greeted her.  If he had done something wrong, what was going to happen to him?  She had enough power, enough dominance, to absolutely crush him, then heal him and do it again.

            "Calm down, kitty kat.  It's okay.  Answer me one more question, okay?  Just one?"  He nodded, not having a choice.  "What did you do before you came here when it was time for the change?"

            He shuddered, clutching tighter to himself.  His voce was barely audible when he spoke.  "They'd just lock me in a room until I was human again.  Or there was a cage out back…"

            Nire was silent for a long moment before murmuring, "Oh you poor baby.  You poor, poor baby."

            "Am I going to have to go back?" he blurted out before he could stop himself.  Immediately, before the words even had time to register on Nire's brain, he flinched back and whimpered.  He had spoken without being asked a direct question.  That was never allowed.

            "Gods no!" Nire exclaimed.  "Uh-uh, no way, never."  She shuddered slightly.  "You'd be insane if you did.'  She sighed and took another swig from her silver flask, muttering, "Gods-be-damned, I'm getting immune to this dren.'"

            Abel whimpered slightly, daring to whisper, "Than what am I supposed to do?"

            He dropped his chin to his chest, staring at the floor with watery blue eyes.  He was sick and tired of worrying every night, of being afraid all the time because there was no one to protect him.  At least Kane had made sure he was not killed by any of the rougher people who had him.  He was tired of watching the moon with more fear than usual these past couple weeks.  With all of his might, he prayed.  He prayed that this Nimir-Ra, this alpha were that could and would hurt him worse than anyone else, would offer him something.  Anything.  He didn't care, as long as he was not alone anymore.  As long as he belonged to someone.

            "Kitty kat, you have to go to someone.  If you don't know any more pards, you don't really have time to go find one."

            He whimpered quietly, screwing up all of his courage, pushing down his fear of punishment for asking a question.  Quietly, timidly, tremulously, he asked, "What about you?"

            Nire nodded once, grinning.  "Aye, that's an option.  You can join my pard, or just visit for the full moon, or I can stay here until it's over.  Whatever you prefer.  Or, you can *_try* to go it alone; I know a few who do."  Abel shook his head a little, panic suddenly lining his body.  "But, seeing as how they never taught you anything, that might not be wise.  It wouldn't do to have Nick investigate a wild-animal death that 'doesn't feel right' and trace it back to you."_

            Abel opened his mouth to answer her.  It didn't matter to him as long as there was someone taking care of him.  Nire quickly stopped him, holding up her right hand.

            "Uh-uh, don't answer now, kitty kat.  Think about it for a couple days.  What do *_you* want?"  She took another swig._

            Abel watched the silver flask warily as it was recapped and returned to her back pocket.  It didn't *_smell* like alcohol, but… His father had been bad enough as a drunk.  He could not imagine the random pain a drunken shapeshifter would cause._

            Nire followed his gaze to find out what he was looking at with such fear in his eyes.  She took out the flask and sloshed the contents a little.  "No, it's not alcohol, nor is it mixed with alcohol.  Cross my heart.  You can try some, if you want, but I'm telling you right now you won't be able to sleep for the rest of the day."

            Abel shrugged, so she asked, "Was that an 'I don't care if I can't sleep' or an 'It doesn't matter; I don't want any'?"

            It was actually both, but as he considered carefully before he answered, he decided on the former.  Whatever she had smelled good, seet, like lavender and cinnamon.  If she was freely offering it, then why not.  Of course , it could be some kind of trick or trap, but he had nothing to lose.

            "The first one," he said softly.

            "Okaly dokely.  Give me your glass."  He downed the last of the milk and handed it to her, not wanting to get as close as he had to.  Why couldn't he just take a swig like she was doing?  "It's a pure silver flask, kitty kat.  You don't want to be touching it."

            He looked up at her slightly.  Why hadn't she given it to him anyway?  Any of *_them* would have.  Then laughed at his cry of pain and punished him if he dropped it.  Was she another one who was different?  That couldn't be, though.  No one with that much power could resist using it on those who were submissive.  And how could she touch it?  Was she another masochist?  But…_

            "Here ya go."  He flinched slightly as she handed him the glass, quarter of an inch of the stuff at the bottom.  It was a colorless liquid, but smelled delicious.  "Smells yummy, eh?" she asked, smiling as he tried to smell it inconspicuously.

            He glanced up at her ad took a careful sip.  The liquid slid coolly down his throat.  It tasted delicious, just like it smelled.  When the single mouthful was gone, he licked his lips appreciatively and carefully set the glass down.  As the first touch of the liquid reached his stomach, he was wide-awake and alert.  She had been right - he was not going to be sleeping at all until tomorrow.

            Nire grinned at the surprised look on his face.  "Tol'ja, kitty kat.  But it tastes good, no?"

            Abel nodded, a timid smile on his face.  It was very good.,  He flinched back as she pushed herself off of the table and limped back to the living room.  Wondering what had happened to her, he followed, a couple feet behind.  She settled on her makeshift bed and leaned her head back onto the couch, staring at the ceiling.  The vampire was covered by a light blanket, and still sound asleep.

            Assuming that he had been dismissed, he went and stood at the bottom of the stairs.  Surprisingly, although he would have given anything a couple moments ago to be up in the guest room, he now did not want to go back up.  He wasn't quite sure what Nire smelled like, but it gave him a feeling he could only describe as…comforting.  Many other weres, in previous years, had decided that Nire smelled like home.  Barely knowing what that felt like, never mind what to call it, he could not quite put his finger on it.  But it made him want to stay just a few moments longer.  He was wide-awake, now, after all.

            Nire turned her head and looked at him, noticing his hesitation.  "What?  You can either go upstairs or stay down here.  It doesn't matter to me - it's not like you'll be keeping my up.  The gods know I'm going to be bored silly," she muttered at the end.

            There was a moment's hesitation on Abel's part, but in the end, he crept carefully over to that area of the vast room.  He would chance it and stay, at least for the time being.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 17/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  The lyrics are, respectively, the theme song from the movie 'The Last Unicorn'.  The 'shivvies' comment is courtesy of Chiana, from 'Farscape'.  The MacDuff one is Shakespeare.  Yes, I know that, in actuality, that's not what the guy really says in the play, but that's what everyone thinks it is, so… I'm going with the popular opinion.

Vastly Important Note: I'm sending out my most humble and sincere apologies.  I could have sworn that I had warned y'all at some point that the odds were, this was going to turn into a Mary Sue fic.  My apologies.  So, yes, I know what kind of travesty this has turned into, but I'm not changing anything, on the basis that this is ridiculously fun for me to write.  Sorry.  Well, no, onto my retarded fic.  :-D

**Chapter Seventeen**

            Natalie woke up to an empty bed.  At first, she glanced at the clock and assumed Nick was at work.  When it finally registered on her groggy brain that their shower was running, she realized that he must have taken the day off.  That was good - she didn't want to be left alone in the loft with a strange vampire, a brusque girl, and a young man who was apparently hiding something.  There was much to be said for moral support.

            Briefly, she considered joining Nick in the shower - *_that* was always fun.  The reasoning piece of her brain quickly caught up with the rest of her.  She did not know if the vampire downstairs was awake, but if he were, he would be able to hear everything.  Instead, she sat up and grabbed her hairbrush, running it through her wild curls.  She needed coffee, but had to make herself relatively presentable before going downstairs.  Of course, that only meant brushing her hair and throwing on a robe._

            She stopped, just out of view of the living room, surprised to hear Abel's quiet laugh and Nire's voice.

            "No, I'm serious!  He did.  So I'm like, 'No Dan, only *_you* think that-'" There was a pause.  "Someone's awake."_

            It immediately went dead silent; Natalie could picture both of them intently listening.  How had the girl been able to tell she was up?  Natalie shook her head tiredly and went downstairs.  She needed coffee before she would be able to think.

            "G'morn'n'," Nire said brightly.  "Or evenin', depending on how picky you are."

            "Morning," Natalie responded, smiling a good morning at Abel.

            She went over and started the coffee.  They were almost out of filters, which meant she could have to go buy more.  That was scary thought - actually going out in public again.  Irina was encouraging her to go out of the loft (with Nick) more, but it wasn't happening so far.  And he still walked her to the door of the shrink's building every night, and waited for her when her session had ended.  It was pathetic.

            Abel rose from where he was sitting on the floor, a couple of feet away from Nire.  He felt vaguely guilty for staying downstairs all night, listening to Nire talk, but he didn't know why.  Realizing that Nire had been in the middle of a story and he had interrupted her, he froze, panic filling his eyes.

            She laughed at his panicked look.  "Easy, kitty kat.  No one listens to me anyways.  Go ahead."

            "I listen to you, M'ija," a soft, silver voice said.

            "You're awake!" Nire whirled around so she was kneeling, facing the vampire on the couch.  Her hands danced in the air lightly around his golden face, afraid to touch.

            Abel moved to the kitchen where Natalie was, walking carefully so as to draw the least attention to himself.  With someone else conscious, the mood and attitude of everyone could change.  He declined politely, if nervously, when Natalie offered him a cup of coffee.  Nick stopped on the catwalk, not wanting to interrupt something.  But he wanted to be downstairs just in case.  Frozen by indecision, he stayed where he was, with a bird's-eye view of the whole scene.

            Jander looked away, casting his silver eyes to the ground.  Nire's hands finally settled on his cheek, her thumb gently caressing the soft skin.  Pain, physical and emotion, was etched into his angular features.  Nire's face showed a tenderness that people rarely got to see.

            "Oh, baby," she crooned.  "Please don't beat yourself up over everything.  None of it was your fault."

            Silver eyes spoke a million words as his body slumped into the couch in shame.

            Nire sighed and lay her cheek on her chest.  "But I don't *_care_*.  It was…oh, love, if only I could make you understand."

            Love?  Nick's forehead crinkled slightly.  Nire was eighteen at the most.  That made the elf a bit too old for her, did it not?

            Jander's arms slowly crept around Nire's back, hugging her close.  "Easy on the left," she warned him.  His arms immediately loosened, but locked.  She could not get away if she wanted to.

            Nick heard him muttering, "Don't leave me.  Please don't let go.  Stay here."

            Nire broke into barely audible song, a comforting lullaby, of sorts.  "When the last eagle flies over the last crumbling mountain, / And the last lion roars at the last dusty fountain, / In the shadow of the forest though she may be old and worn, / They will stare unbelieving at the last unicorn…"

*  *  *  *  *

            Jander had exhaustedly drifted off into a deep sleep only a few minutes later.  Nire limped over into the kitchen and dropped into a chair, absently rubbing the marks on her neck.  Nick came and joined them.  Immediately, the girl turned to him.

            "This happened to you before, no?"

            He nodded.  It had not been a happy experience.

            "So, what's he going to be like for the next couple days?" she questioned him calmly.

            "Weak and sore," Nick answered.  "It's… not pleasant to recover from.  Stairs are a no for a few days," he said as an example.  "It will take about a week and a half for everything to be flushed out of his bloodstream."

            "A week, ey?" Nire paused.  "Can we stay here for that long?  If I take him home, he'll try to be up and about within a day or so."

            Natalie glanced at Nick and Abel before saying, "Of course."  Abel was remarkably calm compared to how he was yesterday.  She might as well agree to it.

            "You two are…ah…" Nick drifted off, suddenly unsure if he wanted to say anything at all.

            "He's my boyfriend, yes."

            Natalie looked quizzically at Nick.  What was he driving at so bluntly?  She prayed that he would not say what she thought he was going to.

            "Isn't he a bit…ah…old, for you?"

            Nire raised an eyebrow, meeting Natalie's shocked gaze.  "Did he really just say that?  Please tell me those words didn't just come out of his mouth."

            "What?" Nick asked, completely confused.

            "Nick, love," Natalie said gently.  "Think about hat for a moment.  Everyone's a bit too young for both you and him at this point."

            At least Nick had the good grace to look sheepish as he said, "Oh."

            "Step one, open mouth; step two, insert foot.  Right?" Nire joked to relieve the embarrassment that was hanging in the air.

            Natalie pushed herself away from the edge of the counter, downing the dregs from her coffee cup.  "My turn for a shower."  She kissed Nick's cheek on her way past and up the stairs.

            As soon as she was gone, Nire slumped in the chair, muttering, "Dren.  I have to get the babies.  I can't leave 'em with Rogue for that much longer."  She raised her voice, speaking to Nick.  "Can I seriously stay for, like, a week?"

            Nick nodded.  "Of course.  About my earlier comment-"

            "Eh." Nire waved it off.  "I get it a lot.  A'ight."  A pen appeared in her hand, and she began writing on her left hand, turning down Nick's offer of paper and muttering the list she was writing to herself.  "Send the babies home… get clothes… toothbrush… hairbrush… deodorant… paper 'n' pen… wait, no, I got the pen… history book… this is all gonna get washed off by my sweaty hands… a'ight."  She looked up, meeting Abel's eyes.  "Right," she glance at Nick, "I'm gonna go get my stuff."

            She limped to over by the couch, made a motion, and stepped forward, disappearing.  Immediately, the vampire shot up to a sitting position, his silver eyes frantically searching the expansive room.

            "She went to get clothing and such," Nick said.

            The vampire nodded slightly, sucking a wisp of hair behind a pointed ear.  He did not calm down, though, nervousness sitting close to his golden skin.  Nire was back within five minutes, a pile of stuff in her hands.

            "Don't get your shivvies in an uproar, Jander.  I had to get clothes for us and crap.  And my history book - if we're gonna be stayin' here at least a week, I'm gonna be missing school, and we got multiple tests coming up."  She dropped everything in a pile (a relatively neat pile) by the end of the couch.  Then she sat down next to the elf and wrapped her arms around him.  "Take a deep breath, love.  I have to go get the baby-babies.  I can't leave 'em with Rogue for this long."

            He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and began gnawing on it.  "I know."

            "You gonna be cool with that?" When he nodded, she stood up and went over to Nick.  " 'Kay.  So, I'm really sorry about this, but I gotta go get my kids.  They're just coming in this gate and going right through to home."

            Nick nodded.  "Okay, sure."  It sounded easy enough.  Even though the area where she had disappeared screamed danger at him.  But she seemed fine, after going through it.

            Nire nodded and went over to the area, blowing a kiss to the nervous vampire on the couch.  After motioning once more, she disappeared.  A long moment passed before a teenage boy appeared with a toddler on his hip and one standing by each side.  They were gone in another second.  Then the boy was back alone, then gone and back with two more kids.  Then he flickered out and came back with a little girl.

            Instead of immediately taking the step and a half and disappearing again, the toddler struggled out of his arms and ran over to Jander as fast as her little legs could carry her.

            "Jan'ner!  Jan'ner!" she cried joyfully as the vampire swooped her up in his arms.  Her arms locked around his neck, obviously not planning on letting go.

            Jander motioned vaguely at the boy.  "Go ahead, Cay, go home.  I'll send her home soon."

            The boy, Cay, nodded, but didn't move.  After half a second, Jander motioned him over.  The teen flew to join the group hug.  Nick watched with jealousy shining in his eyes.  If he did not become mortal, and Natalie stayed with him, then they would probably adopt a child.  But the odds of them finding a baby… He knew that Natalie dearly wanted children, which he could not give her.  Perhaps it would be best if he left so she could have a normal life.

            Regretfully, Jander said, "You two have to go home."  His voice was muffled, his mouth buried between the two children's shoulders.

            Immediately, the baby began to wail.  "Okay, okay," Jander hurriedly said.  "In a couple minutes.  Just don't cry."

            Amazingly, she was immediately quiet.  A girl - not Nire - appeared and flickered out, carrying a backpack.  Minute by minute, Jander was growing visibly more nervous.  Finally, he stood up wobbly and handed the baby to the boy.

            Before she could start to wail, he said, "I have to… I just…"

            "He'll be back in a sec, 'Riyah," the boy helped.  "We can stay here 'till they come back."

            Jander unsteadily walked to the area, concentrating on each step.  He disappeared.  Immediately, the two children leaned over the back of the couch.

            "Hi," the teen said.  "I'm Caleb.  This is Amariyah.  We'll be gone in a couple of minutes."

            "I'm Nick."

            "I'm Abel."  Abel actually smiled slightly at the two children.  The little girl was so sweet and cute, he couldn't help it.

            Nire and Jander reappeared, Nire making a slight motion.  The baby slid off the couch and toddled over to the teen, grabbing on to her right leg.

            Nire pointed to the couch sternly.  "Go," she ordered Jander.  He stumbled over and heavily sat down.  " 'Riyah, you and Cay have to go home."

            Immediately, the baby started wailing, clinging to Nire's legs even tighter.  It was shrill enough to cause the three non-humans to wince.  Abel cringed as he winced, knowing what was coming - Nire would slap the girl to shut her up, or punch her, or something.

            "Tone it down, Amariyah," Nire said mildly.  The toddler quieted down to sniffling.  "I've got absolutely no right to ask if you can stay, too."

            Tears poured down the baby's face.  "No go," she sobbed.

            "Yeah, well, you have to.  Dan's waiting for you."  The baby's wails got louder.  Abel flinched as Nire reached down to the girl, expecting a sharp crack.  Nire slipped her hands between her leg and the toddler, pulling her up to be situated on her hip.

            "Cay, you might as well go home.  I don't want to send her to Dan all hysterical, so…"

            Caleb nodded, walking over to where Nire was standing.  "When are you guys coming home?"

            "Soon," Jander immediately said in a voice of liquid silver.

            Nire rolled her eyes.  "A week, kiddo.  We'll be home in a week at the most.  Tell everyone else, 'kay?"

            The boy nodded and took the step that made him disappear.  Nire sighed and set the baby on her feet, telling her to go to Jander.  Then the teenager scrubbed her arm across her eyes and sighed, turning to meet Jander's curious eyes.

            "I'm *_really_* sorry," she said, her gray eyes apologetic.  "I'll send her home in a couple minutes.  I just… I mean, how can you say no to a face like that?" she shrugged helplessly.

            "It's okay," Nick said.  "She's a cute kid.'

            Abel nodded his agreement from his spot in the far end of the kitchen.

            Nire grinned and nodded.  She turned and watched toddler clinging to the vampire on the couch, her cheek on his chest.  Nick watched with deep envy.  This was not fair at all.  Then again, life never was.  Nire finally sighed regretfully.

            "Let's go, Amariyah.  I can't keep the gate open much longer."

            "No," the toddler stubbornly said.

            "She's right, 'Riyah," Jander said quietly.  "Go over to Nire."

            "No."  Her face began to pucker up.

            "Now, 'Riyah." Nire ordered, the child pushing herself off of Jander and dragging her feet to Nire, her bottom lip trembling.  "Don't even start crying again.  'S not gonna get you anywhere.  C'mere."  Nire swung the pouting baby up and kissed her cheek, murmuring, "We'll be with you twenty-four/seven, and in a week, we'll be home."

            The baby whined and clung to Nire's neck.  Gently, Nire unclasped her chubby hands and set her on the ground.

            "Say thanks to Nick for letting you stay."  Nire patiently waited.

            "T'ank you Nick."  Nick grinned at the baby talk.

            "Now scat," Nire said, giving her a little push in the right direction.

            The toddler left, decidedly unhappy.  As soon as she was gone, Nire made a motion, and stumbled slightly as though dizzy. , The silver flask reappeared and she took a long draught.  Abel wondered if she was going to offer him some.  The stuff was good - he'd gladly have another mouthful.  Unfortunately, it disappeared back into her pocket.

            Natalie trotted down the stairs at that point, asking, "What was with the commotion down here?"

            "I had to get my kids and send them home, and they had to pass through here, and 'Riyah didn't want to go home," Nire said in one breath.

            "O-kay," Natalie responded in a tone of voice that clearly said 'I'm not even going to ask'.  She did not want to know what the teenager was talking about.

            "You happy?" Nire asked.  "I got stitches."

            Natalie raised an eyebrow.  So she had gone somewhere else for stitches in this short of a time?  "You seemed pretty set on the fact that no one was coming near you with a needle."

            "I was, but then it got pointed out to me that one of my friends has few enough friends of her own, and she doesn't need one of them dying 'cause they were too stubborn to get medical attention."  She paused for a breath.  "So I let the doctor at the school stitch me up.  Nothing personal.  You just didn't know the right arguments."

            "Right," Natalie said, dismissing it.  "I'm making breakfast.  Do either of you want anything?"

            "No thanks," Abel said quietly.

            "Noperz," Nire said.  "I'm good."

            "When was the last time you ate, M'ija?" Jander asked, making Natalie jump.  She hadn't realized he was awake.

            "Um…" She was quite obviously trying to remember.

            Jander transferred his attention from the teen to the other people in the room.  "Has she eaten since she got here?"  Everyone shook their heads.  Jander closed his eyes for a brief moment.  "That makes… too many days.  Make her something."

            "What do you want?" Natalie asked the teenager again.

            "Nothing." Nire glared at Jander.  "I'm not hungry."

            "Eat something, M'ija."

            "No," she said stubbornly.  " 'Sides, it's too early to eat.  I'd just end up puking up everything."

            Natalie wasn't going to get into any sort of argument.  She did not want to deal with a fat, anorexic kid on top of everything else.  Instead, she turned away and put a bagel in the toaster oven.

            "You have to eat *_something_* Jander argued.

            Nire grinned smugly.  "Then you have to eat something, too.'

            The vampire's mouth gaped open and shut.  Nire laughed slightly at his expression, turning to the three people in the kitchen.  "When that's done, pop me in some toast, 'kay?  And someone toss me over a bottle of blood."

            Natalie nodded, pulling out a loaf of bred.  Nick grabbed a bottle of straight blood from the very back of the fridge and threw a spiral pass to Nire.  She caught it expertly, grinning widely.

            "Stirred, not shaken."  She turned and held it out to the elven vampire.  "Drink up, love.  You need your strength."

            It was regretfully taken from her hands and regarded as though it were hemlock juice.  "M'ija…" he begged.

            "Its donated, chicolisto.  Were it not, 'twouldn't matter.  Drink up, and I'll give you a surprise when we get home."

            Nick could identify with how the other vampire undoubtedly felt.  How often had he held a bottle of blood before his eyes with the same loathing in his eyes?  With a fatalistic attitude, Jander pulled out the cork and upended the bottle.  After the first couple sips, he began to guzzle it, the gnawing hunger in the pit of his stomach overcoming his disgust.

            Nire smiled in relief when it was empty, taking back the bottle and tousling his golden hair.  "Thanks, love."

            "What do you want on your toast?" Natalie asked as Nire limped over to put the empty green bottle in the sink.

            "Eh, whatever."  She shrugged.  "Butter, I guess."

            When Natalie handed her the plate, she glared balefully at it.  It disappeared into her mouth no less regretfully than the blood had disappeared down the vampire's throat.

*  *  *  *  *

            Abel lay on his mattress, sleepy, but not wanting to sleep.  As he heard Natalie and Nick close the door to their bedroom, the last vestiges of light were extinguished in the loft.  He couldn't even see the warm glow of sunlight from behind the thick curtains.  The darkness, the silence, was total and complete.

            His eyes were wide open, searching the shadows for anything visible.  *_Anything_*, even if it was his brother standing at the foot of the bed, whip in hand.  He could feel the walls, the floor, the ceiling pulling away from the center of the room, expanding outwards until he was all alone.  The feel of the mattress beneath him faded, until it was just him, floating in a sea of nothing.

            It was cold – it was cold all alone.  He gasped in short breaths – the dark was pulling the air out of his body, pulling and leaving him with nothing.  Gloom swallowed up the world, swallowed up the sounds of people outside.  The walls crept outward, pushing everything away.

            He was all alone in the world.  No one was left but him.

            With a strangled whimper, he threw himself out of bed, thumping to the floor.  The walls snapped back, and the sounds of the outside world returned.  He rested on his hands and knees, head down, gasping in great lungfuls of air.

            Before he could loose his nerve, he got up and stumbled out onto the catwalk.  Nire sat up and unerringly met his gaze in the darkness.  Tears pricking at his eyes, he hesitated at the top of the stairs before creeping down, fear mixed with desperation sounding in each soft step.  At the bottom of the stairs, he dropped onto all fours, his head down, and crawled over to her.

            He whimpered, groveling on the floor before her.  "You can have me, do whatever you want with me.  As long as I'm yours," he begged her, chocking back a sob.

            "Whoa, easy there kitty kat," Nire murmured, lifting up his face with cool, dry fingers.  He flinched from her gentle touch, even though he tried his hardest not to, fearing she would say no if he moved.  He thought that he could do it, that he would be able to make it all on his own.  How wrong he was.

            "I don't want you, kitty kat."  Abel flinched and whimpered, crouching on the floor unhappily.  Nire winced at her phrasing.  "Aw, shit, I didn't mean it like that.  C'mere.  Sit down."  She patted the spot next to her.

            Abel warily sat, holding himself in the smallest possible place on the floor.  He sniffled, attempting to hold in his frightened, desperate sobs.  Nire did not try to touch him, to stroke him, to do anything other than talk.

            "Let me rephrase that sentence, okay?  If you're sure that what you wish is to join my pard, then so it will be.  But I expect no payment, not anything.  You're your own person, mm?  You get what I mean?"

            He nodded nervously – he thought he did.  She did not want him as a plaything.  That didn't mean that she wouldn't pass him around, though.  Would she protect him, too?  Although she could hurt him the worst, she would be able to protect him the best.

            "But I'm yours?" He whimpered softly.

            She laughed quietly.  "Hell yeah.  You've been mine ever since I saw you and realized you had no one else to protect you.  Not matter what you chose, you're mine to protect."

            He whimpered softly, shivering.  Exhaustion weighed down his eyelids, but he did not wish to go to bed.  He did not want to go back upstairs to be alone in the dark.  He could not be sure if she was serious, or if she meant everything she said.  Doubt and fear gnawed at him now, a dual fear of both being alone and of belonging to someone.  Both prospects now terrified him.  But being alone… Were he given his druthers between being on his own and being back with his brother, he would choose Kane.

            Nire yawned, glancing over at the trembling wereleopard.  "What do you want, kittykat?  I'm too tired to play Twenty Questions with you."

            He whimpered, drawing his knees up to his chest and resting his chin on them.   "Can I sleep down here?" he asked tremulously.

            "Wouldn't you be more comfortable in your bed upstairs?" She cocked an eyebrow at him.

            He whimpered again, a pitiful noise, as a few tears managed to slip down his face. "I don't want to be alone," he whispered.

            "Oh you poor, poor kitty kat," Nire murmured sympathetically.  "What if we all go upstairs," she suggested, " 'cause you have a big bed, right?"  When he nodded, she continued.  "I can't leave him alone down here, but it isn't fair to make you sleep on the floor.  Is that okay?"

            Abel nodded, brushing away the tears on his face.  He flinched away as Nire turned, her fingers gently smoothing through the wheat-gold hair of the vampire.  Immediately, he stirred, silver eyes sleepily flickering open.

            "Wake up my love.  We're moving upstairs."

            A golden-hued hand immediately grasped her wrist.  "Don't leave me alone," he begged.

            "We means you and me, chicolisto," Nire said gently.  "Let go of my wrist and sit up."  She helped him to sit and swing his legs over the edge of the couch.

            Abel scuttled away from them, keeping out of arms reach.  The motion catching her eye, Nire looked at him and smiled reassuringly.  Jander pushed himself up, unsteadily balancing on his feet.  One of his arms went around Nire's shoulders, using her for support.

            She grinned at Abel.  "Lead on, MacDuff," she said.

            He took that to mean that he was to go first, not recognizing the quote.  At the top of the stairs, he stopped, nervously waiting for the two slower ones.  Nire was murmuring words of encouragement to the weak vampire.  He was having serious difficulties with the stairs.

            In his bedroom, Nire paused by the door.  "Which side of the bed do you sleep on, kitty kat?"

            He shrugged.  It had never mattered to him.  Most of the time, he was lucky if he got a bed.  As Nire's hand suddenly lit up with purple fire, he backed away a couple steps, quivering.  The fear the sudden light had produced overwhelmed his instinct for staying in the same spot so as not to be beat for trying to run.

            "It's okay, kitty kat," Nire said gently, sitting Jander on the side of the bed closest to the door.  "It's just so I can see better.'

            Nervously, he licked his lips.  She dimmed the purple glow until it barely lit her hand.  With a steeling of his nerves, Abel crept carefully to 'his' side of the bed, and stood there, waiting permission to lie down.  Nire climbed over Jander, lying down beside him.  She patted the bed.

            "C'mon, chico.  Come lie down.  I promise, neither of us are going to hurt you."  She smiled slightly as Jander pillowed his head on her shoulder.  As he nestled into her side, he smiled complacently at the scared cat.

            "She'd comfortable," he said softly.  "Like a big giant pillow."

            Abel warily climbed into the bed, staying at the very edge.  Nire softly laughed.  "You're the only were I know who doesn't go for physical contact every chance there is.  It's going to drive you insane.  Come on closer."  She sighed, a mixture of sleepiness and happiness.  "A cute guy on either side of me.  Could life get any better?"

            Abel froze as she said that.  He knew there had to be an ulterior motive to her offer of protection.  Of course, he could not refuse her.  If she was into the S&M scene, then it was too bad for him.

            "I'm kidding, man," Nire said quickly.  "Relax and go to sleep."  She rolled onto the right side, scooting closer to Abel.  Fearfully, but seeing no choice, he rolled so his back was to her.  He whimpered softly as he felt her soft touch, going around his stomach and pulling him until he was lined against her body.

            "Go to sleep, kitty kat," Nire whispered, her breath tickling the back of his neck.  "Cross my heart, hope to die, I'll protect you, never hurt you."

            Abel could feel a rumbling in Nire's chest through his thin T-shirt.  When the soft rumbling reached his ears, he realized she was… purring.  No one had ever… The sound, combined with the obvious protectiveness of Nire's body actually did comfort him.  And he felt as safe as he supposed he ever would.

            Still afraid of what she would do to him, but somehow knowing that she would protect him from others, he drifted off into a restful (for once) sleep.

Note:  Chicolisto is Spanish for 'smart one'.  Yeah, you guys know what I mean, like when someone finally figures out something that's totally 'Duh!' and you sarcastically say "Hey, very good smart one, you finally got it."


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 18/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  The hand thing is courtesy 'Mystery Science Theater 3000'.  Now, I'm only going on an audio of it, because I never saw that particular episode, only heard that piece second-hand from a friend.  Micah's mine.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to Cat.er for providing me with the hand thing.  Thanks to all my reviewers who feed my addiction.

**Chapter Eighteen**

            That evening, Abel woke quietly, a moment of panic gripping him when the other bodies in the bed registered on his brain, thinking he was back, before.  Nire's voice quickly brought him back to where he really was.

            "If you don't stop moving around, I'm going to cut your balls off," she threatened sleepily.

            Abel froze, terrified.  He was now nestled between Nire's arm and her side, one leg over hers.  She gently squeezed his shoulders.

            "I wasn't talking to you, kitty kat.  I was talking to the dipshit on the other side of me."  She focused her attention on Jander.  "Now, either stop moving and go back to sleep, or go back downstairs."

            Jander's silver eyes peeked at Abel over Nire's body.  A sweet smile spread across his face as he rolled his eyes.  "Sorry M'ija," he said in his soft voice, sitting up unsteadily and speaking to Abel.  "No matter what she says, or how much she threatens, she won't cut off any vital parts."

            "You're keeping me awake," Nire muttered.

            Abel's eyes begged Jander to stop talking, but the vampire merely laughed softly.  "Nor will she cause you any sort of pain.  Now, shut up and go back to sleep, little one."  He unsteadily walked out of the door.

            Nire growled and gently took her arm away from where it was around Abel, sitting up at the same time.  "It's doesn't matter now," she called.  "I'm wide awake."

            Abel watched her with fearful eyes, jumping when she flopped back down a few moments later.  "Screw it, no I'm not.  I'm going back to sleep."  She glanced at the frightened young man next to her.  "He's right, kitty kat, I'm all bark and no bite."

            She rolled over, putting her back to him.  Ever so slowly, Abel began inching closer to her.  Before he could get close, she got up.

            "He's getting antsy down there, and I don't want him trying to come up the stairs again."  She reached down, ignoring the way he flinched from her hand, and tousled Abel's short black hair.  "If you're not coming down right now, see you later."

            Abel watched her as she walked out of the sparse room.  This was beyond being too good to be true.  He didn't want to look this gift horse in the mouth, but…

~~~~{@

            Nick gently inhaled, the spicy scent of Natalie's hair filling his nostrils.  Her head lay on his chest, one of her arms across his body.  A small, happy smile graced her beautiful features.  It was half an hour until the alarm went off.

            He gently eased out from under her.  In an hour and a half, he had to take her to therapy.  Although he knew that she liked Irina, she hated the fact that she needed to go.  Nick smiled slightly.  He'd go downstairs and make pancakes.  When she got out of the shower, they would be done and ready for her to eat.  Maybe that would put her in a better mood.

            After covering her up more snugly, he eased the door shut behind him as he left the room.  Out on the catwalk, at the top of the stairs, he paused.  There were two distinct heartbeats in Abel's room, and Jander was painstakingly making his way down the stairs.  Everything sounded relatively okay in Abel's room, so he headed down the stairs.  When the vampire glanced up at him, stumbling upon the waver in concentration, Nick grabbed his elbow, helping him regain his balance.

            "Thanks," Jander said gratefully.  "This is…"     

            "The absolute worst thing you've ever experienced?" Nick provided, helping the golden-skinned vampire down the rest of the stairs.

            Jander laughed softly.  "Exactly.  I never thought I could be in this much physical pain."

            The use of the word 'physical' was not lost on Nick.  He murmured a sound of agreement, the noise of one who has gone through the same experience.

            "Then why did you go upstairs?" Nick asked blatantly.

            Jander sighed and slumped back on the couch, his fingers nervously drumming on the leather.  "I just follow Nire wherever she goes.  She just woke me up and told me she was going upstairs, if I was going to follow."  He shrugged tiredly.  "Abel probably had a nightmare or something."

            Nick raised an eyebrow slightly. Why would the teenager care anything for the young man who was terrified of her?  And if Abel were going to go to anyone, it would be Natalie.

            Jander glanced up at the stairs, nervously licking his lips, before answering the look.  "If he needed someone up there, she would go.  That's what she does.   If someone doesn't have anyone else, or has no one to protect them and can't protect themselves, she does."  He rolled his eyes and sighed.  "She doesn't even know him, and she'd lay down her life if it meant he would get away; she'd seek revenge on those who made him who he is, if it would give him peace."  He laughed softly.  "And if he needs to be protected from himself, she'll figure out something.  The lass is a genius in every way."

            "Pretty speech," Nire said from the top of the stairs.  She limped her way down to them.

            Visibly relaxing, a sweet smile spread across Jander's face.  "Why, thank you, M'ija."

            Within five seconds of that comment, Abel had appeared at the top of the stairs, cautiously coming down.  Nire grinned widely as she looked up at him.

            "Yo yo yo, whassup dawg," she said, her grin teasing and mischievous.

            Jander and Nick rolled their eyes simultaneously.  The entire world was rolling in its grave as she said that.  Abel smiled slightly, barely noticeable.  Seeing that, Nick decided that whatever it was, it did not matter.  The young man was okay, better than he had been for the past couple of days.  Going to the kitchen, Nick began pulling out things to make pancakes from scratch.

            "Do you guys want pancakes?" he asked the two mortals.

            Abel watched Nire, as she said, "No thanks."

            "Nire," Jander said warningly, mustering a glare.

            Nire sighed as though she were a martyr.  "Fine, sure, I'll have some, why not?  Let's think about this for a moment - half an hour to eat each meal, three meals a day, makes an hour and a half of eating per day.  That times three sixty-five days a year is… five hundred 'n' seventeen hours 'n' fifteen minutes a year.  That's, like, um… twenty-two days a year.  Twenty-two *_days* wasted eating.  What a waste of *_my_* precious minutes."_

            Nick paused in his rummaging.  "Is that a yes?"

            Nire sighed.  "Yeah, sure.  Yum, yum, panqueques."

            "Abel?" Nick asked.

            "Yes please," was the quiet answer.

            "I have to ask," Nire said as Nick began to mix things in a bowl.  "You *_do* know how to cook, right?"_

            Nick laughed.  "Yes, I do.  Why would I offer if I couldn't?"

            Nire shrugged, grinning.  "I'unno."  She jerked a thumb at Jander.  "Once he started hanging with mortals, we all had to teach him how to cook so he didn't poison us to death when it was his turn to make us all food."

            Jander sighed.  "There are so many things wrong with that sentence."

            "Do I *_look_* like I'm in school?" Nire muttered.

            Nire smiled slightly, mixing the batter.  They were an entertaining duo, if nothing else.  It reminded him of, scarily enough, he and LaCroix, when he was but a fledgling, and they were vacationing in Paris.  Back then, LaCroix had been much more easygoing, actually given to some humor.  But then he had changed, gotten so much more surely and manipulative.

            *_Or was it I that changed? * Nick mused as the pancake batter sizzled into round circles on the skillet.  Brief bits of remembered conversation flickered through his head as he leaned by the stove ("Why can't you just leave me alone?"  "Because this foolish quest is killing you."  "Maybe that's what I *_want_*!").  Now that he was actually thinking about it, at least in the beginning, LaCroix has always had a reason for interfering.  And had not, when Nick had been content with being a vampire, had not LaCroix been a good father figure?_

            There was a nagging feeling at the base of Nick's brain that he should go visit the ancient Roman.  It was almost the dawn of a new century - almost in a vampire's way of thought - and maybe that would bring a new ay of life for him.  He could make amends with LaCroix, and Janette now that she was back in town.  It could go back to how it was those first couple years.

            Nick shook himself out of his nostalgic thoughts.  Nothing could ever be how it was before, in the beginning.  They had grown apart too much.  He had moved too far from the two vampires closest to him.  Too much had been said, had been done on all three parts to go back.

            He sighed and flipped over the pancakes.  The sounds of the shower started upstairs, telling him that Natalie was awake.  She would be downstairs in another half an hour.  The two younger mortals would hopefully be done eating by then.  He hoped there were strawberries and powdered sugar somewhere in the kitchen.

            When the pancakes were done, Nick split them onto two plates, putting the plates, silverware, butter, and maple syrup on the table.  "They're done, guys."

            Nire ambled over to the table, her hands in her pockets, snagging out the chair with her foot.  As soon as she sat, Abel stopped standing uncertainly at the corner of the table and sat in the other chair.  He put a dab of maple syrup on his, where as Nire smothered hers with butter and syrup.

            "I'm trying to clog my arteries and get in the _Guinness Book of World Records_ for being the youngest person to need triple bypass surgery 'cause of it," she said cheerfully at Nick's look.

            Looking at the teen's body, he believed her.  And she was close to her goal, he would guess.  As the mortals ate, he began to go through the cabinets and the fridge, looking for strawberries and powdered sugar. The sugar was easy to find.  Finally, he decided to go upstairs and ask Natalie about the strawberries.

            Upstairs, he knocked on the bathroom door before opening it.  "Hey Nat?"

            "What?" she asked tiredly.

            "Do we have any strawberries?"

            "There's probably frozen ones in the freezer.  Why?"

            "Just wondering," Nick replied.  "See you in a bit."

            He gently shut the door again, the air of the bedroom feeling cool against his face in contrast to the humid air of the bathroom.  At the bottom of the stairs, he stopped short at the scene in the kitchen.

            Jander had moved over to the table and was sitting next to Nire, both of their back to him.

            "Please?" the nosferatu begged the teenager.  "Just a little nibble?"

            "No," she said stubbornly.  "It's mine."

            "An itty bitty teeny weenie bit.  That's all I want.  One bite."

            Nire sighed.  "You were just half dead.  You can't tell me that this would be good for your system."

            "Sure it would."

            Nire growled, making Abel jump.  From her actions, Nick could tell that she was using her fork to cut off a piece of pancake and covering it in syrup.  She lifted it, dripping with syrup and butter.  Jander expectantly opened his mouth, and she popped it in.  He chewed and swallowed, like it was the finest vintage blood in the world.

            "Oh my gods, that was so good," he said, licking his lips to get the last of the syrup.

            "Jesus Christ," Nire muttered.  "You have a bigger sweet tooth than I do."

            "How…" Nick took a few steps forward, his mind already jumping to conclusions.  If he could eat mortal food and enjoy it, could he go out in the sun, too?  Or was he not a true vampire, some sort of dhampir or Hunter?

            "Frell," Nire swore, looking guilty.  Abel looked as though he could smell a storm brewing and wanted to run, but was too afraid to.  Jander looked just as guilty as Nire.

            "I thought you were a vampire," Nick said accusatorily.

            "I am," Jander said calmly, glancing at Nire.  "But, well…"

            "Mmkay," Nire interrupted.  "I suggest you flip los panqueques, and I'll try to explain."

            Absolutely bubbling with curiosity, Nick followed her directions.  Struck by a sudden reminder, he took the frozen strawberries out of the freezer and started thawing them as Nire spoke.

            "This is going to require you to… Ah, hell, U don't know what I'm talking about.  Just accept what I'm saying, 'kay?  I'm not in the mood for stupid questions.

            "You see, magic, the metaphysical, is very real, despite what Natalie thinks.  Mages - magic workers - do exist.  Check that," she interrupted herself.  "I don't know if they do on this particular world, but where I hail from, they do."

            She forked another bite pf pancake into her mouth and swallowed before continuing.  "So, I'm a mage, yada yada yada, and I created a potion for Jander that… lessened some of the vampiric downsides."

            "Like what?" Nick interrupted, devoting his entire attention to her.

            "Like…" She hesitated for a moment.  "Like, he can eat mortal food, and it tastes 'normal'.  But it won't sustain him for long - he still has to drink blood.  And it negates the effects of holy objects on his undead flesh."

            "Can you-" Nick immediately started.

            Jander interrupted with a sharp, "No!"

            Nick's shocked eyes met the other vampire's apologetic gaze, only one phrase was running through his mind - 'Why not?'  Why would one vampire want to withhold the blessing from another?  Why, when they were so similar?  Could he not understand?  Did he not remember how it felt?

            Nire nuzzled Jander's protective hand that gripped her shoulder before answering.  "Stay your judgments my friend," she said to Nick.  "He has plenty enough a reason to protest so vehemently.  When I did it for him, it almost killed me."  She laughed bitterly.  "In fact, that was pretty much the whole point.  One good thing would have come of my time on the many worlds I had been on, and I wouldn't have to deal with the farce people call life any longer."

            She paused for a moment, as though collecting herself, then grinned.  "But I promise you, if I ever start seriously thinking about suicide again, I'll keep you in mind, and that'll be the way I go out."

            Nick opened his mouth to protest, to say something, but Jander's words stopped him.  "Ignore her."  The elven vampire rolled his silver eyes.  "She's got a morbid sense of humor.  And the pancakes smell done.'

            "Panqueques," Nire muttered around the chewed up mass in her mouth.

            "Pancakes," Jander reiterated.  "You're not Spanish."

            "Juan bobo," she muttered, mischievously grinning at Abel.  "Jander es estupido porque su mama le dropped-o en su cabeza cuando era un joven."

            At the confused look, Jander provided, "She just said I was stupid because my mother dropped me on my head when I was little."

            The young man's body relaxed as the fight that never happened ended.  His lips quirked slightly, hesitantly returning her grin.  The last piece of his pancakes disappeared into his mouth.  When he swallowed, he stood up and went over to the sink, rinsing off his plate and putting it in the dishwasher.  Nire followed his example, doing the same.  She snickered softly as she did.

            "What?" Nick asked, still slightly miffed.

            "Nothing," she said nonchalantly.  "I just got the sudden urge to toss the plate on the floor just to see it break."

            Nick raised an eyebrow slightly at that.  But he said nothing as the three people roped to the living room.  His mind was roiling in turbulent waves as he stacked the pancakes on a plate.  In the back of his mind, he heard the hair dryer stop; meaning Natalie would be downstairs soon.  Mortality might not be possible for now, but something close to it was obviously accessible.  He could *_eat_* again, instead of feeding.  He could go to mass, read a Bible.  Would sunlight be part of the bargain?  Could he have that too?

            He drizzled the strawberries and the red juice over the top of the stack of pancakes and then sprinkled powdered sugar over that.  Setting it at her place, he added a glass of orange juice.  With perfect timing, Natalie walked down the stairs, sniffing the air.

            "Mm, that smells delicious."  A happy smile spread across her face as she saw the simple, yet delectable-looking presentation.  "It looks almost *_too_* good to eat."

            Extremely pleased, she hugged Nick and kissed him soundly.  This was a wonderful start to the morning.  Nick's thoughts were drawn from speculating on other offering of the potion by her warm body.  But as soon as she sat down, he returned to his thoughts.  He would do almost anything for mortality or something close to it.  But the death of a child? No, that was too much, far beyond him.  Perhaps she could teach him how to make it and he would on it on his own…

~~~~{@

            Five minutes after the lift door had clanged shut, Nire grinned devilishly.  "Yes!  They're gone!  We've got the whole place to ourselves…" She drifted off speculatively.

            As Abel began to get nervous, Jander rolled his eyes, something he seemed to do a lot.  "And what are you going to do that you can't do when they're here, M'ija?  You hear Nick - he's dropping off Natalie, going to the store, and picking her back up.  They'll be home in an hour and a half."

            "I don't know yet," Nire said blithely.  "But isn't there just something… relaxing about being alone in a building?"

            Abel knew what she was talking about - he understood perfectly.  When he was alone, he could do as he pleased.  He didn't have to worry about being at Kane's beck and call, or worry about his brother looking over his shoulder and making him feel like an idiot.  The walls may try to run away from him, but they *_never_* judged.  They *_never_* tried to physically hurt him.

            Nire's eyes alighted on Nick's state-of-the-art sound system.  "Oo!  Music… You know how to work it, kitty kat?"

            "No," he said nervously, cringing slightly.

            Nire shrugged.  "No matter.  I bet I can figure it out easy.  What kind of music do you like chico?"

            Abel shrugged.  "I don't know."

            Nire held her hand out flat, and a CD appeared in it.  "Mix CD," she said proudly, heading for the expensive equipment.  After fiddling for a couple minutes, the mellow sounds of Simon and Garfunkel's "Sound of Silence" came through the speakers.

            "Oh yeah, that's real music," she said, vaulting over the back of the couch and landing next to Jander.  "Yo yo yo, I'm bored."

            Abel whimpered softly to himself.  Boredom had made Kane violent.  What would it do to Nire?

            She glanced at him.  "Is there one phrase in the world that you're *_not_* afraid of?"  She managed to make the frustrated phrase into a gently question.

            Abel valiantly tried to think of something, anything, not wanting to lie.  But even simple phrases such as 'good morning'… He shuddered slightly.  With the amount of people he had been loaned out to, nothing was left untouched.

            "Come on," Nire prompted gently.  "There's got to be something, some word, some action that's not going to make you cringe like I'm about to hit you."

            One thing immediately popped into his head, and he whispered it quietly.  "When you purr."  That was probably the one thing no one had ever done around him.

            Nire grinned.  "See?  I know there had to be something."  She drummed her fingers to the beat of DMX 'Who We Be'.  "Soy aburridado!  Voy a morir de boredom-o."

            "Shut up, Nire," Jander said mildly.

            "Make me, monkey boy,' she joked.

            Jander looked himself up and down and grinned at Abel.  "I was once a mortal, once an elf, once a vampire.  But last time I checked I was never a monkey."

            Nire tumbled over the back of the couch and began doing back flips, surprisingly agile for someone her size.  She could only use one hand, but it was enough.  Eventually, she was doing gymnastics double-time to David Sylvain's "I Surrender".

            "La la la la la la I surrender."  She came to a sudden stop, looking around confusedly.  "If I were a hand, where would I hide?" she mused.

            Abel threw a confused look at Jander, who merely rolled his eyes.  The young man transferred his attention back to Nire.  After a few seconds, he realized that one of the sleeves of her white sweatshirt didn't have a hand poking from it.

            "Me sleeve!" she said as though it were an ingenious realization.  As she peeked inside and her hand popped out, she shrieked and began to laugh.  "Oh, I crack myself up."

            Abel began to laugh quietly, too.  That had actually been funny.  Although he logically knew that she was just fooling around, the look on her face was priceless.  She continued to bounce around like a happy child, chanting out her boredom in various languages.

            Jander rolled his eyes at Abel.  "I swear, she has tripolar disorder.  She can be a happy adult, a depressed adult, or, when there's no adults around, the psychotic child you see now."

            Abel smiled hesitantly. The two of them seemed to exude a calming aura.  Even Nire, in her bounciness, did not unnerve him as much as Natalie did even when she was trying not to.  Nire had the relaxing scent, and Jander, the soothing voice.  He could feel himself beginning to relax, to actually feel relatively safe.

            The feeling was shattered as a little boy appeared from nowhere and the CD track switched to Aerosmith's 'Dream On'.  Nire stopped her flipping, whirling to face the child.  Abel cringed into the chair as he took in her angry look.

            "Micah," she growled.  "What are you doing here?"

Note:  'Panqueques' are obviously pancakes.  'Juan bobo' means something like 'foolish guy', or something like that.  I don't remember exactly.  'Soy aburridado' means 'I am bored', 'cept I think I might have made up the word 'aburridado'.  'Voy a morir de boredom-o' is 'I'm going to die of boredom'.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 19/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  The lyrics are from Salivia's "Always".  They're a bit screwed up to make them fit, but, ya know.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to all my reviewers who feed my addiction.

**Chapter Nineteen**

            The child stared, unanswering.  Nire sighed exasperatedly.

            "How did you know I was in someplace safe?  As far as you knew, we could have been in some battle!  That's why you *_ask* first!"_

            "If I'd-a asked," the boy burst out angrily, "you'd-a just said no!  You *_always* do!"_

            "No I would not have," Nire said, toning her voice down.  The effect on Abel that her anger had was not lost on her.

            "Yuh-huh!  If Amariyah or Dawn or Ivy asked, you'd-a said yes.  But you always say no to *_me*."  Abel could smell the salt of the angry tears that streaked down the child's face._

            "Yeah, well, the baby's a baby.  And I most certainly do *_not_* always say yes to her.  And Dawn 'n' Ivy still think I'm gonna dump them back with their aunt, or just leave them somewhere.  So of course I'm going to say yes to them.  *_Honestly*," she huffed._

            "It's still not *_fair_*," Micah cried.

            "Life isn't fair.  And didn't I say I as going to tan your hide if you pulled any of this shit again?" Nire said warningly.

            Abel whimpered softly, trying to burrow into the chair and still be able to see Nire.  Jander, noticing this, spoke quietly.

            "Easy there," he said gently.  "Her bark is a million times worse than her bite - all threats and no action.  Watch."

            Nire growled in frustration, pointing to Jander.  "Go.  Satisfy yourself that Jander's still alive, too."

            The boy sulkily went over to the couch.  Jander ruffled his hair.  "You should have asked, young one.  She would have said yes, this time."

            Micah grumbled, looking utterly miserable.  He went back to Nire, his head hanging.  "I'm sorry."

            "Damn, kid.  Why can I never stay mad at you guys for long?  C'mere, ya little suckuh."  She hugged the little boy reassuringly.  "Don't I *_always* give you a reason why I say 'no', kiddo?  There's a reason why you're supposed to ask."_

            "I just wanted…" he sniffled.

            "Yeah, I know kiddo.  Do Chris or Sasha know you're here?" she questioned.

            "No," he pouted.

            "Then you have to go back right now."

            "But-" he started to protest.

            "No buts," Nire ordered, handing him money.  "Here.  I'm bribing you now.  Tell Chris I said to take you out for ice cream, or something.  We'll be home in a couple days."

            "But-" he tried again, sniffling.

            "Nope, I don't wanna hear them.  Plus, isn't this one time you got to see me and the girls didn't?"

            That seemed to pacify the boy.  He muttered a goodbye, the cash clenched in his fist, and left.  Muttering to herself, Nire went back to the couch and plopped down on it.  When she went by him, Abel flinched away uncertainly.

            "I swear, that boy is going to drive me to drink," she muttered, remarkably subdued.

            Abel shivered in his chair, frightened.  True, she had not acted on the threat of physical punishment, but still… She *_had* threatened it.  And threats could become reality all too quickly._

            The terrified look on his face didn't escape Nire's notice.  She patted the couch next to her.  "C'mere kitty kat."

            He crawled over to her reluctantly, whining quietly.  He cringed on the couch next to her, cringed away from her fearfully.  When she touched his shoulder, he flinched away and whimpered.

            "Whoa, easy there kitty kat," she murmured, quietly purring.  "C'mere.  I'm not going to hurt you."  She gently pulled him closer to her, until he was stiffly curled against her, braced for pain.  But the regular rumblings in her chest were slowly relaxing him, negating his fear.  Touching, being touched, comforting human contact was… was a balm on his pain.  Especially the way Nire did it, like she was protecting him from the world through every touch.

            "Listen to me, kitty kat, okay?"  She ran her fingers soothingly through his hair, her hands cool against his hot skin.  "There's a *_big* difference between spanking a child and abusing someone.  Number one, a *__child* is spanked.  And you are most certainly not a child.  And being spanked hurts for a few seconds at the most."  She sighed and rested her cheek on the top of his head.  "Ah, kitty kat.  What more can I say?  There's an ever bigger difference between whapping an orphan like Micah, and whapping someone like you.  The first one's sometimes okay, but the latter's a *_big_* no-no, no matter what."_

            Abel could feel the peaceful vibrations of Nire's purring lulling his fears.  Talk was cheap, but the rumbling feel… He drew his knees up to his chest, locking his arms around them.  How could he feel this safe with her?  But he did.  She had promised to protect him, and she had not done anything to convince him that she wouldn't.  Of course, she had done little to prove she would.  Either way, when she touched him, it didn't hurt, it comforted.  So, when would it change?

~~~~{@

            Nick hummed to the melody of the classical music playing on the radio.  Natalie had left her purse in their bedroom, and wanted him to get it for her before picking her up.  After driving around the city for a while, he had finally made his way back to the loft.  Turning off the engine and stepping out of the car, he could hear the commotion up on the second floor - the *_happy_* commotion.  Nire was talking, Abel was laughing; Nick decided not to interrupt.  Instead, he went up the back stairs and directly onto the catwalk.  But the scene downstairs stopped him.

            One of the three had figured out how to work his CD player.  Nire or Abel must have provided the CD, because he definitely did *_not_* have 'Cotton-Eyed Joe' in his collection.  Nire was bouncing around, doing the line dance that went with the song.  Abel was shyly attempting to follow the moves, his face slightly flushed and happy.  Jander watched them over the back of the couch, his eyes flickering between Nire in the middle of the room and Abel in the corner.

            "No, no, no," Nire said. "That's not how you do it.  C'mere.  C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mere."  She motioned Abel over until he came.  His movements were still hesitant, but there was not nearly as much fear in his step as usual.

            "Now watch," Nire said, narrating what she was doing.  "Five, six, seven, eight.  Right two, left two, right left right left, foot front foot back, step cross step clap, step spin step clap, and do it again."

            Abel's grin widened as he nodded.  Nire trotted to the store to restart the upbeat song.  For a couple more seconds, Nick watched, a slight smile on his face.  Never had he seen Abel this happy, this relaxed.  Then he went into the bedroom to find Natalie's purse.

~~~~{@

            Abel's eyes sparkled as the song ended.  He was thirsty now.  Tentatively, as the track changed to "Scarborough Fair/Canticle" by Simon and Garfunkle, he offered to Nire, "Do you want a glass of water?"

            "No thanks," she said, humming along to the tune.

            He went over to the sink and filled up a glass for himself.  As he finished the last drop, Nire said, "Actually, yeah, I am pretty t'irsty.  Couldja grab me a glass of water, kitty kat."

            Eager to please his new, benevolent owner, he quickly filled a new glass and hurried over to give it to her.  The thump of Sydney jumping onto the counter distracted him and he glanced back.  That brief moment was just enough to make him run smack-dab into Nire.  The glass went flying out of his hands and smashed onto the floor, shattering.  Nire tripped backwards and fell, he landed on top of her.

            Abel immediately scrambled backwards, scuttled backwards, and crouched, trembling, on the floor.  "I'm sorry," he whimpered, his stark blue eyes filled with terror.

            "Are you okay, M'ija?" Jander asked, concern filling his voice.

            "I don't know," Nire groaned.  "I think I'm dead.  Frell, that *_hurt*."_

            Abel cringed as she pushed herself up and to her feet.  "I'm sorry," he whimpered again.

            "It's okay," she said soothingly.  "C'mere, kitty kat."

            He slunk to her feet and huddled there, trembling, bracing himself for a blow.  When her fingers touched his head, he whimpered.  But she stroked the side of his face and cupped his chin, gently making him look at her.

            "It was an accident, kitty kat.  Not your fault, not mine.  If anything, it was the cat's fault."  He cringed and mewled as she held out her hand, palm up.  A gentle smile spread across her face.  "Easy there kitty kat.  You want a hand up?"

            His hand inched up to hers, involuntarily jerking back as she grasped it.  Loosely gripping his wrist, she wouldn't let him pull back, instead gently pulling him to his feet.

            "Come on, kitty kat.  Let's clean this up before Nick and Natalie get home."  She smiled amiably at him, gently squeezing his hand before dropping it.

            Nick came out onto the catwalk, Natalie's purse in one hand.  "You guys okay down there?" he asked, just to make sure.  Abel's heart sounded like that of a cornered rabbit.

            If it had been physically possible, the young man's face would have gone a whiter shade of pale.  As it was, his heartbeat sped up even more and he started to noticeably tremble.

            Nire beat him to the punch.  "Sure," she said brightly.  "Kind of a funny story, actually.  We were horsing around, ya know, bounce bounce bounce."  Her hands flew all over, weaving the fictitious tale just as much as her words did.  "And I was like, 'awla awla awla, I'm dying of thirst,' and bing bang boom I traipsed over to get a glass of water.  An' then I was bouncin' back over, drinkin' my water, an' not paying attention.  Pow!" Her hands crashed together, the loud noise making Abel jerk.  "I crashed into Abel.  And bam!  We whammed to the floor.  And I was like 'ack!  I'm dy'n!' cuz, ya know, my stitches hurt.  An' Abel was like, 'oh no!' " She clapped her hands to her cheeks, Macaulay Culkin-style.  "Meanwhile, the glass was flying through the air with the greatest of ease, until crash!  Tinkle tinkle, it shattered on the floor."  She took a deep breath.  "So, yeah, I kinda broke a glass.  But, ya know, I'll clean it up and all."

            Nick smiled bemusedly.  "Okay… I'm going to pick up Natalie and go to the grocery store.  Any requests?"

            Abel shook his head nervously, watching Nire with fear in his eyes.  She had lied to keep him out of trouble.  So what did she expect in return?

            "What month is it?" Nire asked.

            "Um… December," Nick replied, slightly confused.  Why else would a Christmas tree be up?

            "Then nope," Nire said happily.  "See ya later."

            "Right.  Bye.'  Nick shook his head slightly was he went down the back stairs.

            As soon as he was gone, Nire began to purr softly.  "Take a deep breath, kitty kat.  You're okay.'  She stiffly bent down and began picking up the big shards of glass.  Abel quickly dropped to his knees and began to help.  "Careful," Nire warned.  "Don't cut yourself."  She began the process of calming down the abused man all over again.

~~~~{@

            Out of the corner of his eyes, Nick watched Natalie as she walked up and down the aisles of the grocery store, pushing the cart of food in front of her.  She was nervous, but only he could tell.  The store was almost empty at this time of night, and they were almost done.  It was one of the many benefits of shopping for only one person.  Two, now that Abel was staying with them.

            As she tossed a gallon of double chocolate fudge ice cream into the cart, he dropped a light kiss onto the back of her neck.

            "Are we almost done?" he asked, just to be a pain.

            "Yes, Nick," she said patiently, smiling at him.  Even when he was being an idiot, he was cute.

            She had hoped that Nick would have gone to the store while he was waiting to pick her up.  But, no, he wanted her to come, because he didn't know what to get.  As she pushed the rattling cart down the aisles, throwing things in, she mused over how her perspective had changed.  Before, going through a store, the other people didn't really exist.  They were just… things that she only noticed if they got in her way.

            Now… Now, however, her nerves would have been up on edge if Nick had not been beside her.  Even so… she knew where everyone in the aisle was.  No longer were they innocuous entities, but possible threats to be watched.  She was on high alert.

            And she hated it.

            Never was she more glad than when they went through the checkout and loaded everything into the trunk.  She sat in the car while Nick put the cart back.  Were she to be completely honest with herself, it hadn't been that bad.  Certainly not as nerve wracking as she had expected.  Of course, that had probably been because she could *_feel_* Nick and his support like a faint tingle at the base of her skull.

            Nick leaned over and kissed her cheek as he got into the Caddy.  "Love you, Nat."

            She smiled softly.  "Love you, too."

            Nick nuzzled her cheek, then turned the key in the ignition.  As he pulled out of the parking lot, he half-glanced at Natalie, a boyish smile on his face.  "What do you say that you and I go out to dinner tomorrow night?"

            "It sounds like a plan."  Natalie smiled widely.  She could not say no - not when he said it in that tone of voice that indicated he had already had everything planned out for a long time.  "May I ask where?" she inquired curiously.

            Nick's smile was reminiscent of the cat that ate the canary.  "Well…" he drawled teasingly.  "I was thinking, maybe… the 360?"

            Natalie gasped happily.  "Really?" she asked, her voice full of excitement.  "Can you even get reservations that fast?" she asked, a mischievous twinkle in her eye.

            Nick glanced over at her again and said sheepishly, "I made the reservations a couple weeks ago, then completely forgot about them…"

            Natalie grinned happily.  Nick always seemed to know exactly what she needed, and knew it months before she herself knew.  She did not know how she would have survived everything without him - she'd have gone insane.

            Eventually, they reached the loft.  As they began loading the paper bags into the lift, Natalie realized that she could hear ripping vocals of a woman's voice coming from inside.  Slightly curiously, she listened to the lyrics.

            "I love you / I hate you / I can't get around you / I breathe you / I taste you / I can't live without you / I just can't take anymore / This life of solitude / I guess that I'm out the door / And now I'm done with you."

            How did songwriters know how to put life into such simple words?  She loved Nick dearly, but there were times when he drove her insane.  His over-protectiveness - as if she were going to shatter into a million pieces at times, his incessant guilt, his insistence that everything that went wrong was somehow his fault… all of those things made her nuts at his blindness.  But how could she live without him around?  He had become such an integral part of her life… As pathetic as it was, she actually did miss him when he was gone, even just at work.  It didn't matter how she *_wanted_* to feel, she needed him.  How many times had they *_both_* tried to walk away?  Each time, they were stopped by the other, pleading for one more chance.  And only God knew how much she hated living alone, in more ways than one.  That was why she couldn't begrudge Abel for wanting to stay.

            "I love you / I hate you / I can't live without you / I left my head around your heart / Why would you tear my world apart / Always / Always / Always / Always."

            Nick smiled slightly, the phrase of music striking a chord within him.  The very first law of being a vampire was to *_never_* get emotionally attached to a mortal.  And yet, as soon as he met Natalie, saw her lack of fear of him that thought went flying out the window.  Rational thought, at least on that subject, was nonexistence.  The siren call of her spirit captured him like a fly in a spider's web.

            "I see / The blood all over your hands / Does it make you feel / More like a man."

            Oh, yes, Natalie knew how that felt.  When Nick took her blood, he tried to shield her from the more gruesome images and feelings from his past.  She had seen the blood on his hands and felt the small part of him - the piece he called his Beast - that was proud of it.  It wasn't that which bothered her, but the fact that he refused to admit it.  She could never get him to understand that the only difference between him and a mortal man, in that respect, was that the little piece of him had a physical manifestation, too.

            "Was it all / Just a part of your plan / The pistols shakin' in my hands / And all I hear is the sound /I love you / I hate you / I can't live without you / I just can't take anymore / This life of solitude / I pick myself off the floor / And now I'm done with you…"

            As they rode up in the lift, Nick's slight smile turned sour.  Ah, yes, LaCroix in a nutshell.  In a rare moment of honesty, Nick admitted to himself that, as much as he hated his master, as much as he wished that the ancient vampire would drop off the face of the earth, he could not imagine a world in which LaCroix was not constantly haranguing him.  There *_had* been times in history during which they had gotten along relatively well.  Perhaps…_

            Nick's thoughts were interrupted by the lift's door opening.  For a fleeting moment, he could feel, like a whisper against his mind, an intense anger.  And it was not from Natalie.  As soon as he registered it, it was gone.  The three people were in a semi-circle, a shy grin on Abel's face.  A smile, a fake one, was plastered on Nire's face - Jander looked just plain miserable.

            "M'ija…"

            "Leave it," Nire growled.  The smile slowly faded from Abel's face, as he looked back and forth between the two.  But Nire turned to him, grinning.  "Damn, kitty kat.  You've got to be the best third we've ever had."

            The girl turned to Nick and Natalie.  "You guys want some help?"

            Nick shook his head.  He would put money on the fact that it was Nire's anger he had felt.  Although how he had been able to feel it… That was odd.  When the groceries were all put away, Natalie opened her laptop, logging on to the server at her office.  Nick sat down at the piano and began toying with a melody.

            Everything was quiet for a while.

            It got to be late - two in the morning.  Natalie was still typing paperwork, stuff that she didn't need to have gone to work to do.  Over in the living room, the TV was on to provide background noise - no one was actually watching it.  Jander dozed on the couch, only half-awake.  Nire entertained both Nick and Abel with card tricks.

            "Cut the deck," she told Abel.  He did so, and she put the two halves back together, picking up the top card.  "A'ight.  This is the card you cut to.  Ace of Spades."  She paused.  "Well, that's certainly not good luck.  Anywho," she put the card back on top of the deck, telling Abel to hold out his hand.  He extended it hesitantly.  The card was put in his hand, facedown, and she told him to cover it with his other hand.

            "Obviously, I can't take that card out of your hand without you knowing, right?  Well, regardless, I'm going to make that card change to a different one…" She drifted off, her attention distracted by a news report on TV.  It was nothing new, a repeat of already aired information, but something had caught Nire's attention.

            "A-bel," she said in a falsely cheerful tone.  "Please tell me that's *_not_* your brother?"

            Natalie glanced up at the TV and quickly went back to work at her computer.  Abel looked at the screen, at Nire's face, and quickly at the floor.  "He is."

            "And is he…"

            Abel nodded miserable, risking a quick glance up at her.  She was pissed off, and Jander was suddenly awake and sitting up.

            "I can't *_believe_* this," Nire growled.  "What the frell kind of luck is this."  Abel flinched as she spoke.  A warning look was shot her way by Nick, but she ignored it.  "I hate this.  I *_hate* it.  I need a frelling drink."_

            Nire disappeared with a pop, Abel cringing from the sound with a whine.  His lower lip began to tremble as he fought back tears.  It was not his fault who he was related to.  Maybe she was mad because he hadn't told her right away.  He didn't want her mad at him any more than he wanted Natalie mad at him.

            "She's not mad at you," Jander said kindly.  "It's me she's angry with."  He frowned slightly, rubbing his temples as though he had a headache.  "Let's just say she's been having a bad month.'

            Nick listened interestedly, hoping to find out more about his strange houseguests - including Abel.  The young man looked up at the elven vampire, eyes disbelieving.  He knew what people looked like when they were angry, and Nire had been furious.  The odds were, when she got back, she'd take it out on him somehow.  Especially if she managed to come back drunk.

            "She's going to wander around the city for awhile," the vampire continued, his voice flowing like a river of silver, "walk her frustration off, then come back here.  And we'll work out a plan."

            "What do you mean, 'plan'?" Nick asked.  Jander was making it sound as thought hey were all going to be in danger for some reason.  If that was true, then he wanted Natalie out of the city.  Feeling his concern, she looked up, devoting her full attention to the conversation.

            But all Jander would say from then on out was, "When Nire deems the time appropriate, she will reveal what she wants you to know."


	20. Chapter Twenty

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 20/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13 for language

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  Death belongs to LKH, of course, and 'the last gunslinger of Gilead' belongs to Stephen King.  I'm just having fun with them.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to all my reviewers who feed my addiction.  And thanks to April 'n' Kai for entertaining me enough so that I didn't kill myself after I watched the series finale of 'Farscape'. ;-P  ::runs off to kill whoever decided to end the show::

**Chapter Twenty**

            LaCroix heard the heartbeat long before its owner entered the Raven.  It was the one he had been listening for, in the back of his mind, for weeks.  The brazen girl-child was back.  This would be interesting.  Perhaps more entertaining and informative than before.  He dearly needed something to cheer him up.  Since Janette's return, she had taken over the Raven (even though she had *_sold_* it to him) from his control.  But who was he to begrudge his favorite daughter?  The club was closing tomorrow for renovations.  In other words, Janette was returning it to the way she liked it, from the architecture of the inside to the performers.  Honestly, as much as he liked what he had done, he was glad.  Vampires and gothic lowlifes were the only ones who frequented the place since she left.  The previous clientele was much preferred by him.

            Staying in the corner where he could easily view the entire room, he watched as the child plopped down on a barstool, oblivious of the hungry stares she immediately attracted from the fledglings.  The glare she shot at Miklos was impressive, even to him.

            "Can I get a shot of Wild Turkey this time?" she growled.

            "No," Miklos said placidly, glancing at LaCroix.

            "What the *_fuck_*," she growled.  Her voice was low and dangerous as she asked, "And why not?"

            Miklos raised an eyebrow.  He could take this mere mortal, easy.  "The same reason as last time."

            LaCroix's eyes widened slightly in amazement as she girl began to curse eloquently in ancient Latin - the language of his childhood, the language now spoken by an amount of people he could count on one hand.  And she, not even 'legal' yet, spoke it perfectly.

            "//Watch your mouth, \\" he snapped, without thinking, in the tongue of his birth.

            Her mouth snapped shut, and her head whipped towards him, her ponytail smacking the side of her face.  "//My most humble apologies, \\" she said respectfully, nodding slightly to him.  He liked her attitude.  "//I did not realize anyone here would be able to understand me. \\"

            "//I am the only one. \\" LaCroix sat down on the stool next to her, motioning Miklos back over.  "Give her what she wants," he ordered.

            When the bartended poured her the shot, she tossed it back like a pro.  "Thank you," she said pleasantly.  The small amount of alcohol had already put her in better humor.

            In his smooth radio voice, LaCroix initiated the conversation he wanted - needed - to have.  "That was an interesting theory you had, last time you were in here."   

            She cocked her head for an instant, trying to remember.  "The Many-Worlds Theory?  That's not theory, that's fact."

            "Would you be able to explain it to me?" He wasn't sure what he hoped to achieve by that.  He had heard of the theory before - he knew of it and didn't believe an ounce of it.  But the way the child had talked was as though she could actually do it.  And then, when he followed her out on a whim, she disappeared in front of his eyes.  Perhaps, by listening to her, he would be able to tell if she was serious about what she had said before.

            "Basically, there's a parallel world for every choice made.  In that the world, one of the other choices was taken."  She was obviously not fooled by his question.  "It's best to use an example."  A deck of cards appeared in her hands, and she laid out the King, Jack, and Queen of Hearts, saying respectively, "Let's say there's a man, a guy, and the guy's sister.  The man falls in love with the guy's sister, but the guy feels that's a sucky idea, and tells the man to leave her alone."

            She seemed to pause a moment, to let her words sink in.  LaCroix's visage did not change, but inside, he was shocked.  This couldn't be a coincidence, not the ways he was looking at him.  But how had she found out about that?  How did she know?

            "So, in one world," she continued, "the man says 'Fine, but you owe me.'  In another, he leaves her alone, but never sees the guy again.  In a third, he ends up killing the guy in a fight over the sister.  In another, he ignores the guy; the guy is pissed off for a while, but eventually forgives the man.  And in the last that I can think of, the man says 'Fine, you owe me' and walks away, but a year or so later, the sister disappears - even from him."  As she talked, she moved the cards around to demonstrate what she was saying.  They disappeared back into the deck now that she was finished.

            "And where did she go?" LaCroix asked, his voice soft and dangerous.

            The girl's eyes had gone cold and calculating.  "//The only question needed is *_can you meet my price*? \\"_

            She stood, dropping some bills on the table, and walked away before LaCroix could say anything.  Seeing a white paper amongst the colorful money, he picked it out and went to his apartments in the back.

            He knew that the girl would be back, or that the paper would have instructions for contacting her.  The question was, why?  And did he believe her?  He had seen with his very own eyes her and the other vampire disappear.  It was quite possible that meant that she could do it, or the vampire could.

            This, this was his pet project.  This was his deepest desire.  No one, not even Janette, knew of it.  His one weakness.

            Before he allowed his thoughts to continue further, he unfolded the white slip of paper.  One simple sentence marred the pristine sheet - *_What are you willing to lose? _*

            With a frustrated growl, his fist clenched, crushing the paper.  For the first time in a long while, he was guilty of becoming caught up in the moment.  This child was trying to play him for a fool.  A malicious smile spread across the old Roman's face.  Conveniently forgetting that she already appeared to belong to another vampire, he began to contemplate the desirability of her as a meal.

~~~~{@

            Nick tapped his fingers irritably on the table, a glass of bloodwine in front of him.  Before she had gone to bed, Natalie had given him strict instructions to stay up until Nire came back.  That he could do - that was the easy part.  However, Jander's refusal to talk about why Nire had reacted so harshly was putting him on edge.  They had the look of people who knew danger - Nire walked with the self-confidence of one who knows they can take down everyone in the room.  And, right now, the golden-toned vampire had the look of someone mentally preparing for an incipient fight.

            Jander lay on the couch on his back, staring at the ceiling, but not seeing it.  Abel snuck glances back and forth between the two vampires.  He needed to stay awake until Nire came back, regardless of how frightened he was.  If he weren't awake, that would give her anger time to fester, if she didn't wake him up.  It would be better just to get it over with.  Too, he *_needed* to know how she was going to deal with this - if she really would protect him._

            At five past nine, Nire appeared in the middle of the room, a McDonald's bag in her hand.

            "Good, you're still awake," she said, looking at Nick.

            "I'm sorry," Abel whimpered, once he was sure she wasn't going to continue.

            "For what?" Nire's brow crinkled a little in confusion.

            He stared into her eyes for a brief second, stuttering, "For- for not telling you…"

            "Oh."  Nire waved it off with her free hand.  "No matter.  I've just been having the suckiest month in the world.  You in on the strategy meeting?"

            Nick was itching to interrupt her, and find out what was going on, and begin making plans for moving Natalie if needed.  But even after this short time, he knew that she would come to the point quicker by letting her talk.  When Abel nodded, she motioned him over, holding up the bag.

            "C'mon, then.  I figured you would, so I brought us food, since this might go on for a while."  She plopped the bag on the table, still talking.  "Yeah, so, I got you pancakes and sausages, 'cause I didn't know what you would want.  But you can have my bacon, if you'd prefer that."

            Abel only half listened, walking over cautiously, filled with wonderment.  She had brought him food?  From McDonald's?  He allowed himself, for once, to smell the delicious scents wafting from the bag.  The mere smell of the fluffy golden pancakes made his mouth water.  But as he neared the table, his amazement began to fade.  How many times had he been teased with food from somewhere, then not been allowed to eat it?  Whenever someone brought back anything to eat from a restaurant, or a fast-food joint, he wasn't even allowed the scraps.

            Following the trend people had as of late, Nire surprised him by taking out two Styrofoam boxes.  She handed one of them to him.  Hardly believing his luck, he took it, and sat down, glancing at her multiple times to make sure it really was okay.  A carton of orange juice and maple syrup was slid down to him, too.

            "Like I said, if you don't like the sausages, you can have my bacon, if you want."

            Abel looked up at her and nodded.  He was torn between gobbling down everything so no one could take it from him, or eating slow and savoring every bite.

            If it hadn't been so sad, Nick would be smiling at the look of utter amazement on Abel's face.  The thought crossed his mind, as it had before, that he could probably just make the young man forget everything.  He wasn't sure if the other vampires had even *_tried_* to whammy him.  But he just couldn't do that.  There was the possibility that the memories could come back, and if they did…

            But, even though he barely knew Abel, to see him in so much pain…

            Nick was done waiting, done cogitating.  He wanted to know what was going on, what everybody was not telling him.  Natalie's safety was concerned, and that was something he did not mess with.

            "Now that you're settled," he said, surprised by the coldness in his own voice, "does anyone care to tell me what's going on?"

            "Hold your horses," Nire said mildly, calling over to the couch in a singsong voice, "Jander.  I need you over here too."

            "Yes your royal majesty," was the dry response.

            Nick impatiently tapped his fingers as Jander walked over to the table and sat down.  As soon as he was seated, Nire began to talk, apologizing to Abel.

            "I'm sorry, kitty kat, but I gotta tell him.  At this point, my hands are tied - odds are, he's gonna come here to seek revenge."  She spread her hands helplessly.

            Suddenly not hungry anymore, Abel put down the plastic fork and nodded, his eyes dark with fear.  Nick watched, extremely curious as to what could be bad enough to arrant such a look.

            "Okay, so, yeah," Nire continued.  "Look, Nick, you gotta just believe everything I'm going to say in the next couple minutes."

            "Why?" he asked skeptically.

            "Because I don't want to have to answer six thousand questions and get thrown totally off track.  It's no worse than believing in vampires."

            "What?" Nick asked sarcastically.  "Are you going to tell me that werewolves exist?"

            Nire nodded, considering.  "Well, among other wereanimals, yeah.  Right now, we're more concerned with wereleopards."

            Nick snorted.  "Right."

            Abel flinched as Nire growled.  "Yeah.  I told you - the right hand doesn't know that the *_body_* exist, much less the left hand.  Can we just assume for now that I'm telling the truth?"  At Nick's skeptic nod, she continued.  "All-righty then.  How powerful is your brother, kitty kat?"

            He stammered out, "I don't know.'  There was nothing for him to compare it against, so he had no idea.

            "Could he make you change?" she asked gently.

            Abel nodded.  At times, that was the only thing that would heal him completely.

            "And why is any of this relevant to the point you have yet to make?" Nick asked.

            "Because," Nire said patiently, "if he could make Abel shift to a leopard whenever he wants to, then he can make himself shift.  Which means he can break out of that puny jail cell whenever he wants.  Regardless, he could break out on the full moon."

            Still a skeptic, Nick asked, "Why would that matter?  Wouldn't he just leave the country?"  What would the point in staying be?  The whole country would be looking for him.

            "Well, tell me a bit about what he did.  How many victims?"

            "The end count was eight bodies."

            "Brutally tortured and raped?  A single surviving victim, who happens to be upstairs?" Nick nodded to both questions.  "And when you guys finally brought him into the station.  Did he show any remorse?  Any reaction?"  To those, Nick shook his head no.

            Nire sighed.  "I rest my case.  By being the only one to survive, Natalie made a fool of him.  And you made him out to be an even bigger fool by capturing him."

            "So?" Nick asked.  "He would still try to leave the country."

            Nire sighed.  If Abel had not been so scared, he would have echoed that sigh.  Why couldn't Nick understand it?  It was so obvious.  Kane would bring his lackeys and try to 'punish' all of them for daring to make him look stupid.

            "Can you just trust me on this?" Nire asked.  "It takes a sociopath to know a sociopath."

            Nick scoffed openly at that.  Or, at least, he tried to.  "You?  A-"

            Nire's eyes stopped him.  From intelligent gray storm clouds, they went to empty nothingness.  There was no one home in her head - at least, no one human.  She did not care what he did, what she did.  It was his choice as to what happened next.  He stared into those eyes, a chill going through his body.

            When she spoke, her voice was toneless, unemotional.  That was what made it so frightening - a quality that said everything she had been was just a big charade.  "Yes, I am only sixteen.  But let's put that aside for a moment."  She laid a well-oiled revolver, an older make that Nick didn't recognize, on the table.  "I was taught to wield my guns by the last gunslinger from Gilead."  The life was slowly leeching back into her eyes.  "I learned to clean, to hunt vampires, from Death himself."  She paused to makes sure this was all sinking in.  "I walk through the Valley of Death," she said harshly, "but I have no fear, for I am the deadliest in the Valley.  You're pissed, probably because of something I've done due to my status as Meddling Bitch Queen of the World, but can you knock it off for half an hour?  Please?"

            Nick took a deep breath.  She was right, actually.  He didn't need to be angry right now.  *_Especially* if she was telling the truth.  He was so frustrated over the fact that no one would tell him anything, that when she finally did clue him in, he wasn't listening.  But Kane would come to the loft and probably find Tracy and Vachon, too.  All of the classic signs were there.  Staring into the teenager's eyes, which were now human again, he realized that he was actually afraid of her._

            "Are you done scaring people, Little One?" Jander asked mildly.  She glanced at him and nodded, a slight smirk on her face.  "Then put away your gun."

            It disappeared under the table, and Nick heard it sliding into a holster smoothly.  He didn't remember seeing any sort of holster, or anything like that on her person.  At the tone of her voice when she was talking, Abel whimpered.  He couldn't see her eyes from where she was sitting, but the voice was enough.  She was nice to him so far, but if she was willing to use that *_voice* on Nick…_

            Realizing that this was a teenager, a teenager who was more dangerous than she appeared, who was also carrying a concealed weapon, Nick asked, "Do you have a permit to carry that gun?"

            She flashed it at him, a Canadian permit.  "And one to carry a concealed weapon.  So ha."

            "Okay, okay."  Nick spread his hands.  Apparently, she had an answer for everything.  He wanted to get back tot the task at hand.  "So, he's going to come here first, you're right.  But with the security in this place, that won't matter.  I and some other vampires can just lay in wait for him."

            "For them," Nire corrected.  "Twenty bucks he rounds up the Toronto pard and any vampires he knows.  And that won't work.  If he did all that without getting caught, then he won't be that stupid.  He'll send his people first to check out the scene.  If they don't get in, then he's not gonna come."

            What she said made sense, actually.  Deciding to listen to her more, or at least humor her, Nick asked, "So what do you propose?"

            "Well, plans are useless, 'cause they'll just go wrong - Rule Number Two of Life.  I'm guessing that any vamps are going to try the skylight.  If the weres don't get the vamps to let them in, then…" She paused, and glanced at Abel.  He paled, knowing what she was going to say.  "Well, odds are, he's going to wait for a day when Abel's working, follow him back here, and make him let them all in."

            "Then I should send both him and Natalie away," Nick said like it was obvious.

            Nire sighed.  "No, my friend, you shouldn't.  Trust me, you want these people dead, not loose or back in jail.  From what you've said and how Abel acts, Kane has complete control over his people.  And you don't want a sadistic person like him pulling the strings of such powerful people."

            "So why can't we-" Nick interrupted.

            But Nire interrupted him in return.  "Before you start arguing, listen to me?  Please?  I've had to deal with people like him before.  First of all, assuming they got in, his cronies will immediately be able to tell if Natalie's here or not.  If she's not, then the bait to lure Kane here."

            "But-"

            "Shhht.  Quiet.  I'm almost done, I promise.  I figure she can just stay upstairs in one of the rooms.  Jander can be up there with her, 'cause I don't think he'll be able to fight as well as usual."  Jander nodded in agreement.  Nire continued to talk over Nick's protests.  "Right, seriously.  Think about this, Nick.  You'll be able to get up there in a moment's notice, anyway.  And I'm assuming that they'll send most people down here, to deal with the most of us.  Which means all the healthy peeps should be down here.  No?"

            Unfortunately, Nick had to agree with her.  He did not like it, but she was right.  Nor did he like the fact that *_all_* of her reasoning was right, and it would be best for the invalid vampire to be upstairs.  Jander met his eyes mellowly, a sweet half-smile on his face.  Nick just couldn't picture him as being all that good of a fighter.  But, like Nire had said, he could be upstairs in an instant.

            "But wait!" he said suddenly.  "What about you?  You can barely walk or move your arm."

            "Oh, I healed myself," she said dismissively.  At his raised eyebrow, she turned and lifted the back of her shirt.  Nick's eyes widened.  There was nothing left of the gash on her back but a rigid scar.  And with the amount of blood he had been able to smell when Natalie was checking it out, it should still be an open wound.

            "How did you…" He trailed off.  Up until a week ago, he had thought that the existence of vampires would be the hardest thing he had to swallow.  And now, he was learning something new every day.

            "I just did.  Magic, my jaded friend."  Nire glanced at Abel and began to chew her bottom lip, turning to look at Jander.

            Nick refocused his attention to the task at hand - coming up with a plan.  "How are the bastards going to get in?  Am I just supposed to leave the alarm and locks off?"

            Nire uttered a short bark of laughter.  "Oh, sure, and we'll put up a sign that says 'Welcome to the Trap', too.  Okay, we're assuming that the vamps are coming in through the skylight, and they could force the lock on the back door-"

            "But odds are," Jander picked up, "they're going to look for a way in that causes the least suspicion.  Up the back stairs, through the door, half to search up there, half come down here to dispatch you.  Which means-"

            "-that we need a second person for bait."  Nire easily picked up the sentence, as though the two had done it before.  Abel paled even more.  "And, obviously, the most logical and believable person to do this is you, kitty kat."  Her eyes were sorrowful, almost an apology for what would happen to him.

            Nick could already hear Natalie's protests when she found out about this plan.  He turned a deaf ear to the imagined words, his face hardening slightly.  He would do anything to insure her safety, even inflict further psychological damage on a poor abused man.  Even killing the perpetrates if they tried to hurt her again.

            "Do you think you can do that, kitty kat?" Nire asked gently.

            Abel nodded shakily.  He was already terrified, but could not answer in any other way.  If he didn't say yes, one of the three would make him do it anyway.  The food in his stomach was seriously considering coming back up.  He didn't know why, but he just assumed that Kane would stay in jail.  The realization that he could show up somewhere at any time and reclaim him, sent a chill of fear down his spine.  His hands began to tremble, so he hid them in his lap.

            "This sounds an awful lot like a plan, little one," Jander commented mildly.

            Nick nodded in agreement.  This was a plan.  He could feel the anger of his Beast just below the surface.  It was a fierce, protective rage, because someone was trying to hurt its family.  *_Its_* family.  A slight smile formed on Nick's lips - here was the reassurance that he would not kill Natalie.  This was more solid than the mere fact that he had always been able to stop so far.  His Beast wasn't going to hurt Natalie - it considered her Family.

            "Yeah, I guess it is."  Nire rolled here eyes.  "Which means it'll all go wrong.  //But 's not like when our family battles someone - he can't just read my thoughts to get what I think is going to happen. \\"

            Nick raised an eyebrow slightly.  The girl had brains, but manners she lacked.  He wished that he could get people - some of the members of the Community - to be backup.  But from what she said - and he wasn't sure when, but he had started believing her - they wouldn't know when the attack was coming.  So he would be on his own.

            "Kitty kat."  Nire's soft voice brought Nick out of his daze.  "I need numbers now.  Just a rough guess."

            Abel rolled his eyes up at her, his head still bowed.  He didn't know - they all blended together in his mind to one life of pain.  His mind flashed through the memories, inwardly flinching at each one.

            "Seven shifters, five vampires and…" He vainly struggled to come up with the last number.

            "The rest are mere humans?" Nire asked gently.

            He nodded, his eyes begging for approval.  An easy smile spread across Nire's face as she reassured him.  "Then they don't matter."  She placed her revolver in the middle of the table again.  "Can you shoot a gun?"  Abel shook his head nervously, praying that wasn't going to be a problem.  Nire nodded and turned to Nick.  "Can you h-" She stopped and smacked her forehead.  "I did *_not_* just ask that."

            Nick laughed slightly.  "Well, I would *_hope_* I can handle a gun.  Why?"

            Three boxes of bullets were quickly laid out on the table.  " 'Cause we want to dispatch these bastards straight to Hell as quickly as possible.  Now, these are silver hollow points filled with garlic - good for vampires and shifters.  Aim for the head or the heart.  These are just plain old hollow points filled with garlic.  And these are good old wooden bullets.  Were I you, I'd carry your gun, loaded with these, at all times."  That said, she picked up her own revolver and began loading it with the sliver bullets.

            Deciding that she actually had the right idea, Nick went and got his gun, too.  As he loaded it with the silver - just in case - he asked, "I can see why I would want a loaded gun on me at all times now, but why you?"

            Nire looked up at him, her fingers still deftly sliding the last two bullets home.  "Last time I checked, vampires couldn't be in two places at once."  She winced.  "Sorry, I didn't mean that to come out so sarcastically.  But someone has to keep an eye on Abel.  Right, kitty kat?"

            The young man nodded, a look of complete gratitude suffusing his face.  Nick felt like a complete ass for not thinking of that.  The oddest thing was that he felt absolutely no doubt about the question of whether or not she could protect Abel.

            Nire checked the bullets, making sure they were all in, and snapped the cylinder closed.  "There a firing range around here?"

            "You can't get in without someone over twenty-one with you.  Not at the closest one."

            Nire shrugged.  " 'S no problem.  Where is it?"

            Against his better judgment, Nick gave her the address.  With a slight nod she thanked him, making her gun disappear again.  "Unless you all have something to add, I'm done."

            "I'm impressed," Jander said softly.  "You actually made a plan this time."

            Nire snorted.  "I made a skeleton of a plan.  It's all going to go wrong anyway, so don't count on anything.  You got anything to add, Nick?"

            He thought hard, attempting to find something she missed.  It was embarrassing to have a teenager plan everything out, refuting his ideas with logical arguments.  But there was nothing.  She was good - experienced.

            "Not that I can think of at the moment."  Everyone focused their attention on Abel.  He just shook his head slightly, looking a bit like a deer in the headlights.  Nire nodded once to herself.

            "In that case, I motion to end the meeting."  She smiled slightly.  "That took way less time than I thought it would."

            Nick nodded and stood.  "Are you guys staying up any later?"

            "I am.  I still got pancakes left."  As if to demonstrate her point, Nire forked a piece into her mouth.

            "Turn off the lights before you go to bed, then."  As he went up the stairs, Nick realized with a shock that he viewed Nire as more of an adult than Abel.  Oh the cruel ironies.


	21. Chapter Twenty One

 Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 21/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  R for rape.  Sort of.   m/m

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  I'm just having fun with them.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to all my reviewers who feed my addiction.  And a special thanks goes out to the guy who calls himself Jander (no relation to the one in this fic), for being there for me and patiently listening while I rant about the asses at my school.  If it weren't for him, you guys wouldn't be getting this chapter.  Or any more chapters.  Ever.

Author's Note:  This is shorter than the other chapters have been because I wanted to end it at that particular spot.  And I'm telling you people right now - the next chapter or two is probably going to be heavily on the Abel-oriented side.  I need to play around with him and Nire and Jander for a bit more, and write something fun.  So don't y'all go yelling at me because of it.  I'm giving you a fair warning.

**Chapter Twenty-One**

****

            Nire turned to watch Nick go up the stairs.  Once he was in the bedroom, she turned back to the table.  "You want my bacon, chico?"

            Abel miserable shook his head.  He wasn't hungry.  Not in the least.  Fear, a tight fear, had coiled in the pit of his stomach.  This wasn't the constant fear he now lived with of doing something wrong or getting in trouble.  No, this was the fear of being returned to a worse situation.  It was the painful, deep-seated fear he had of his brother.

            "That just totally ruined your appetite, ey?" Nire asked sympathetically.  She scarfed down her last pancake, standing and throwing out the carton.

            Abel wrung his hands under the table.  He couldn't eat the rest of his meal.  It would make him sick.  But nor could he throw it away, for fear of her becoming angry.  His dilemma was solved as Nire drank the rest of her juice and tossed that and the McDonald's bag away.

            "Kitty kat, if you're not going to eat that, do you want me to put it in the fridge for later or just chuck it?"

            He looked up at her, studying her face, trying to determine if she was serious.  Just because she said it didn't mean she was truthful.

            Nire laughed gently.  "It's just cheap fast food.  A dime a dozen."

            Jander had long since wandered over to the couch, yawning.  Now he leaned over the back, watching Nire with puppy dog eyes.

            Abel finally got up the nerve and opened his mouth, shakily saying, "Trash it."  He pushed back his chair, standing up and folding close the carton.

            Nire took it from him and threw it in the garbage.  "Argh, I'm *_exhausted_*.  Mr. Floor, you have *_never* looked so good."_

            Abel followed her over to the couch, and stood by the back as she settled on the floor.  He rubbed one hand up and down the other arm, nervously licking his lips.  He didn't want to be alone upstairs, not tonight.  But he couldn't figure out how to ask, if he even could ask.  The fear of Kane was worse than the fear of what Nire would do to him for being so presumptuous.

            The young girl looked up at him, twitching her head slightly to shake off Jander's hand, which was playing with her hair.  "Whassa matter, kitty kat?"

            His chin trembled slightly.  He wanted warm bodies around him, not to be all alone.  All too clearly, he could feel the desolation of the night before.  His tongue flicked out to wet his lips again.

            "I…" he whimpered quietly.  "Will you…"

            "Take a breath, kitty kat.  What?  Are we going upstairs again?"

            "Please?" he whispered, begging.

            She laughed softly, poking Jander in the stomach.  "Get up, doofus.  We're moving again."

            Abel could have cried in relief as they went up the stairs together.  As they neared the relative safety of his room, he began having second thoughts.  She may not have tried anything last time, but that didn't mean she wouldn't this time.  Nire slid under the covers in the middle, Jander collapsing next to her.  Gingerly, Abel crawled under the blankets on the other side.  He shivered, even though he still had a fever.

            Nire purred quietly in the pitch-black.  "C'mere, kitty kat.  Neither of us will hurt you."

            He inched closer to her, whimpering softly.  She drew him in, close against her side, ignoring the way he flinched and cringed from her touch.  She didn't say anything, just let the heat from her body seep and mingle with his.  After a few minutes, he relaxed slightly, his stiff muscles loosening a little.  The steady grumbling of Nire's chest slowly lulled him to sleep.

~~~~{@

            When Abel woke up, he was facedown on the bed, completely naked.  With rising panic, he tried to move his arms and legs, quickly discovering that they were tied to the four corners of the bed.  How had they managed to do this without him knowing?  His muscles tensed as he tried to pull himself loose, to get away.

            But when he heard the low, nefarious chuckling behind him, his body wilted.

            "Did you think you could get away from me that easy?"

            Sweaty fingers trailed up his leg, fondling his balls and pinching his ass hard enough to hurt.  Abel whimpered quietly, squeezing his eyes shut as if Kane didn't exist if he couldn't be seen.  Something bit into his back, the blood immediately beginning to run.  He waited for the stirrings of the change - it was too close to the moon for the blood not to cause him to loose control.  To his relief, there was nothing.

            But the happiness over that was shot-lived as he felt a biting pain in his back.  A quiet whimper escaped his mouth as utter hopelessness filled him.  Those were only the first of hours of pain that were sure to come.

            "Shut up!" Repeated blows of whatever it was, left Abel shaking in pain.  He wanted to pass out, he prayed he would pass out, but he didn't.  Again and again and again he was hit.  Over and over until tears leaked from his eyes.  And it was just the beginning.  This wouldn't end until his brother got his fill of pleasure.

            "I've missed you, my brother," Kane purred in his silky voice.  "There's no one around to tend to my needs anymore."

            Abel choked back a sob as more violence was wreaked upon him.  The bed was soaked in his blood.  Soon, sooner than it should have happened, he felt Kane's body hovering over his.  The bed creaked, and he could feel hands pressing down the mattress on either side of him, what felt like a white-hot rod of steel rammed into him again and again, harder and faster each time.  Just before Kane exploded into him-

            -his eyes sprang open in the dark room.  He was sweating and trembling, sobbing.  Immediately, his brain registered the two bodies in the bed, and he scrambled away from them, cowering in the end corner of the bed.  The person who had been spooning him sat up immediately.  Abel whimpered fearfully, cringing away from both of them, but not daring to leave the bed.

            "What's the matter, kitty kat?"  The gentle voice didn't register on his fear-filled mind as one he recognized.  When she reached out to him, he cringed and mewled, shivering.  It was almost as though the hand's motion was arrested by the pitiful sound; it was drawn back to the body.

            "Whoa, easy there, kitty kat."  She seemed to understand that he was too afraid to recognize her.  "Remember me?  Nire?  I taught ya some retarded dances yesterday, brought you McDonalds this morning…" Nothing she was saying registered until she started purring.

            He whimpered again, shaking harder.  He couldn't go back to a life like that.  He just couldn't.  She would kill him, or he would kill himself, but never again.  That kind of pain would kill him.  He was sobbing, but he couldn't stop, no matter how frightened he was of her being angry with him.

            "C'mere, kitty kat," she said gently.  He whimpered quietly, still terrified.  "Come on.  I'm not going to hurt you, I promise."

            She waited patiently, waiting for him to come to a decision.  Tears streamed down his face as he cowered at the end of the bed.  She hadn't hurt him yet, but she could start any time.  And yet, like Natalie, all she offered was comfort.

            "Do you want us to go back downstairs?" she asked gently.

            He opened his mouth to say yes, then snapped it shut, whimpering.  He didn't know what he wanted.  He was terrified of being alone, and he was afraid of them staying.

            She took that to be a 'yes', saying, "Okay, kitty kat.  See you in the morning."

            A snap decision was made as she started to nudge Jander out of the bed.  "No," Abel whimpered.  "Please…" With trembling limbs, he inched over to her, his head down.  He cowered by her feet, waiting, more afraid of Kane than of her.

            She pulled her knees up under her.  "Come on, kitty kat.  Come up here."

            A strangled sob escaped Abel's lips as he forced himself to crawl up to her.  "Sh.  Easy there," she whispered soothingly.  He cringed away from her hands as she reached out to him.  When she touched him, he flinched and whimpered, stiffening as her arms went around him.  But as she began to soothingly rub his back, his arms crept around her and locked as he began sobbing anew.  Nire rocked back and forth slightly, rubbing his back in circles.  The purring was the only sound she made.

            Soon, Abel realized that he was going to wake up Nick, so he choked off his sobs.  Nire squeezed him tighter for a brief instant, then let him go.  He whimpered as she did, but let his hands drop, too.  He didn't want her to stop holding him, but at the same time, he was afraid of it.  He was starved for comforting touch because of the deeply rooted fear he had of people touching him.

            His entire body was still shaking from fear and silent tears streamed down his face.  He couldn't stop either thing.       

            "C'mon, kitty kat," Nire said soothingly.  "Come sleep between us."

            He met Jander's eyes fearfully.  Sleepy, calm gray eyes met his blue ones.  The vampire blinked lazily, actually looking like a relaxing cat.  Deciding that, if Nire trusted him, then- What was he thinking?  Still, he whimpered and stretched out, cringing away from the vampire.  Nire held him as though he were a frightened child.  She had yet to harm him when she purred, only purring when she was trying to calm him down.  Praying she wouldn't change now, he whimpered and clung to her like she was a rock in a storm.

            She stroked his short hair until he stopped flinching from her touch.  "Kitty kat, you're protected on both sides now, and trust me, whoever comes will have to get past both of us to get to you."

            He whimpered fearfully, a sob escaping his mouth.  "I don't want to go back to sleep," he whimpered to her, keeping his head down.

            "Yeah, I know kitty kat.  But I don't have cures for nightmares.  Else I'da used 'em long ago."  She cuddled him closer to her body.  He didn't resist in the least - for the first time in his miserable life, he felt warm and safe.  Not unafraid, no, he still feared Nire.  But she would keep him safe.  And for now, that was all he wanted.

            He sniffled and buried his face in her shoulder like a small child.  When he felt Jander move up closer behind him, he stiffened in fear.  But Nire's soothing purr and meaningless-but-comforting murmurings soon relaxed him.  The bodies on either side of him captured his intense body heat and bounced it back, creating a warm little cocoon for him.  Despite his best intentions, he felt himself falling asleep again.  The violent shivering of his body began to ease off.  Within ten minutes, his exhausted, terrified mind drifted off into unconsciousness.

~~~~{@

            As Nick and Natalie pulled into the parking lot of the '360', he couldn't stop looking at her.  She was absolutely ravishing.  A floor-length black dress clung to her in all the right places, yet still managed to leave plenty to the imagination.  Her hair was piled on the top of her head, with tasteful tendrils framing her face.  She was wearing a pair of dangling earrings he had given her.  A brief bit of shame hit him because of the deep forest-green scarf she had to wear to cover the bite marks on her neck.  But it was really all just part of her teasing allure.  As he handed the valet his keys, accompanied by a warning glare, he kissed the corner of her mouth.

            "Milady, our dinner awaits."  He offered her is arm, the warmth of her hand quickly seeping into his cold flesh.

            When they reached the restaurant, Natalie's eyes immediately flicked around the room, focusing briefly on each table of people.  She could do this.  And, surprisingly, it was the truth.  She couldn't help but sigh in relief, however, when they were led to a table in the corner, by the exit.  Nick smiled understandingly at her, pulling out the chair for her and nuzzling her neck before sitting down.

            Now that they were settled, her back to the wall and Nick between her and the rest of the people in the fancy restaurant, Natalie could look around.  The restaurant itself was elegant and tasteful.  But the view outside… oh, the view outside took her breath away.

            They were above the city.  The tall buildings of Toronto rose above the lit streets, looming like hovering giants.  Watchful, hovering giants.  Light twinkled from windows, turning off and turning on, making the city look like a wonderful display of blinking Christmas lights.  Cars zoomed through the streets, stopping now and again at red lights, providing more of a general glow of light.  The navy blue sky housed thousands of twinkling points of light.  It was beautiful.  The only thing better than this would be flying.

            "I take it you like the view?" Nick asked, slightly amused.

            "I love it," she breathed, tearing her eyes away from the glass walls and focusing on the menu.

            In the end, she ordered Greek salad for an appetizer and roast duck breast for the entrée.  Nick wasn't quite sure what to get, knowing he couldn't eat more than a few bites.  Finally, he decided on a plain salad and veal, two things he knew she would like.  Just in case.  When he noticed Natalie's attention once more drawn to the wrap-around windows, he smiled happily.  Some day, some day soon, he would have to take her flying.  That beautiful smile rarely appeared these days.  Hopefully, what he had planned for the end of this night would bring out that earth-shattering sight.

            The meal was filled with the meaningless chatter and long silences of two close lovers who don't always need words to speak.  They made sure to keep the conversation to light matters, wanting the mood to stay as light and carefree as it had been.  Mostly, they traded stories about past Christmases, Nick being especially careful not to get lost in his memories.  Natalie noticed that he kept looking at her intently all night.  It was as if he was measuring her, judging her.  Although his intense staring unnerved her slightly, she did not comment on it.  That was just something Nick did sometimes, as if her were committing everything about her to memory in case one day he didn't have it.  Whenever she managed to catch his eyes, he would look away quickly, that 'I would be blushing if I could' look suffusing his face.  It was almost as bad as before they had acknowledged their love.

            *_In fact, * she mused, *__this is almost the way he was looking at me the night Schanke died… when he was going to leave.  Oh, Jesus, please don't let that be it. *  He wouldn't actually do that to her, would he?  After all, it was different now… When it was time to move on, she thought he was going to bring her.  Allow her to come.  Or, maybe he had finally gotten tired of her.  Janette was back in town - he could have a perfect body again… No.  Natalie banished those thoughts from her head.  She was *__not* going to spend this lovely dinner worrying about *_that_*.  If Nick had taken her out to dinner just so he could tell her he was moving on without her, well, she would deal._

            Nick, although responding to her words and sharing his own tales of old, was just as lost in thought as she.  And it was just as worrisome.  What if this wasn't the right time?  What if she said no?  Would she really want to be chained to a vampire like that?  And could he fairly ask her to give up any possibility of a normal life?  Jesus, this was far too complicated.  His mind was just running in the circles it had been running in since his conversation with Tracy.  But he wanted it so badly…

            Once dessert was done and everything paid for, Nick stood and offered Natalie his hand.  "Let's go out on the observation deck."

            A brilliant smile spread across her face as she stood.  It was the middle of December, she was going to freeze to death, but it would be worth it.  Of course, Nick, always considerate, gave her the jacket to his tux as soon as they stepped outside.  Natalie tightened her grip on his arm as they walked to the edge of the platform.  The city revolved around them like a slow, multi-colored carousel.

            "It's beautiful," Natalie murmured, looking around.

            "Not as beautiful as you."  Nick pressed her fingers to his lips as she turned to face him, somehow knowing that something was up.

            Nick fumbled for an opening as he drowned in Natalie's soft brown eyes.  His tongue flicked out to nervously lick his lips.  He could do this.  He could get over his fear of rejection and do this.  And if she said no, he could deal with it.  It wouldn't be the end of the world, just the end of *_his_* world.  She just watched him, waiting.  Inside, her spirits were sinking, sure she knew what was to come.  He was just trying to figure out a way to let her down easy.  Finally, Nick forced himself to begin.

            "Nat…" She could hear the nervousness in his voice.  "Since the day I met you, I couldn't stop thinking about you, watching you, wishing I was hearing the sound of your voice when we were apart.  You never turned away from me, you believed when I didn't.  You helped me get through everything, smacked me when I need it, had faith when I didn't.  Now, I'm lost when I'm not with you.  Even when I tried to push you away, you believed.  In me, in us.  I…" He had practiced this over and over again, even written it down so he wouldn't forget.  It had sounded good then, but now… He gulped and plowed ahead, unable to gauge Natalie's reaction to his words.

            "I can't imagine living a day of my life without you by my side.  I can't imagine not waking up and seeing your sweet smile.  I…" He lost it again, couldn't remember what he had planned to say.  Dropping to one knee, he fumbled in his pocket, drawing out a ring box.

            "Natalie?  Will you marry me?" He opened the box, holding it up to her, waiting and praying.  *_Please let her say yes. _*

            Natalie drew Nick's jacket around her more tightly.  Well, this was not what she expected.  A complete shock.  Tears filled her eyes as she stared at the ring.  It was an ordinary, diamond engagement ring.  No, she could tell that it had been his mother's ring.  A perfect ruby was set on a gold band, a sparkling blue sapphire on all for sides of it.  Absolutely beautiful.  This was all she had ever hoped for from Nick, but never dreamed would come true.  Finally, she made her clogged throat work.

            "Yes.  Oh, God yes."

            Nick slid the ring on her finger, kissing her for all he was worth.


	22. Chapter Twenty Two

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 22/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  I'm just having fun with them.  Yes, Dufferin Mall is a real place.  Unfortunately, I have never been there.  So I don't know if the Wal-Mart is actually *_in_* the mall, or in a plaza.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thank you to the internet.  Yes, a retarded thing to thank, but still… I'm actually doing research for this, a major miracle.  So, yes, I am thanking the internet and Google and Toronto.com for their wonderful help in learning me stuff.  :-D

Author's Note:  I finally have my Learner's Permit!  I've been 16 since 12/15, and I finally got mum to take me to get it!  And, I got the oboe reeds I needed.  And we're finally going to go and rent me a piccolo, to see if I actually want one.  And I almost have enough money to buy the professional flute I've been looking at!  And, even better, I've almost learned to play Solfeggietta (I think that's how it's spelled) perfectly.  ::reads over everything I just wrote:: Shit, I need a hobby beyond writing and playing a plethora of instruments…

WARNING!  IMPORTANT!  PLEASE READ!  There is no a single mention of Nick or Natalie in this chapter.  In fact, this entire chapter does little to further the plot, it's just me being bored and trying to entertain myself.  If you absolutely HATE Nire and Jander and Abel, do not read this section.  Wait for the next one.

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

            "Dude."  Nire poked Jander.  "We're in Toronto."

            Abel's head snapped to focus on her.  The tone of voice she spoke in made him nervous, even more nervous than he was from being left along with the two of them.  Natalie must have asked the three of them a hundred times if they were going to be okay on their own.  Now, he wished that he had work tonight so he wasn't here.

            "Little one, that means nothing to me."

            "Dude.  Canada.  Not the US, Canada.  A *_whole* 'nother country."_

            "As opposed to a half country?  So what?"

            "Argh!" Abel flinched back from her growl of frustration.  "When did you get so *_boring*?  Tourist traps, souvenirs, *_fun_*.  Dude, let's *_go_*."_

            "I'm hurt, remember?" Jander reminded her patiently.  But he rolled his eyes at Abel, who smiled tentatively in return.

            "Bull shit.  You're faking now, you're just doin' it 'cause Nick feels bad for you which means I can stay 'till Mother Moon hands low in the sky."

            "Fine, M'ija.  Where do you want to go?  And how are we going to get there?"

            "Who cares?  And last time I checked, we had feet.  I think."  With a grin, she stuck her legs out straight and wiggled her feet.  "Yep.  I got 'em.  And you do, too."

            Abel paled.  They were going to leave him *_alone*?  Oh, why was he even surprised?  Since they were going for souvenirs, he obviously was not allowed to come.  If Kane decided to show up, it didn't matter.  As far as they were concerned, he was just a toy, unimportant.  They were no different from the rest.  His hands were shaking, so he drew his knees up to his chest and clasped his hands around them to hide the trembling._

            "I'm not going *_anywhere_* with you unless you put on real shoes," Jander commented mildly.

            Abel watched with huge, frightened eyes as Nire kicked off her Adidas sandals.  "Duh, my friend.  'S the middle of winter, and I'm not that insane."  She pulled on a pair of old-school skateboarder sneakers that somehow appeared on the floor.  "I got my bro's shoes, and I'll even wear his big-ass, toasty warm black pea cot so the salespeople follow me everywhere like I'm some sort of insane shoplifter punk."  As she said it, a black pea coat dropped onto the couch.  Abel jumped as it did.  They were seriously going to leave him all alone.

            "Kitty kat?" His head snapped up, teary eyes stopping right below hers, as was appropriate.  "You got a winter coat?"

            "I- I have a jacket," he stuttered quietly.  Was she going to give it to the vampire?  To make him look more normal on the street?

            "Are you coming with us?" she asked gently.  "Or are you going to stay here."

            He made eye contact for a split second, shocked.  "I can come?" It escaped before he could stop it, such was his amazement.

            "Uh huh."  Nire nodded reassuringly.  "An' if you wanna stay here, but don't want to stay alone, I can wait to go get all my souvenirs until Nick 'n' Natalie are home.  But if you're comin', go get your shoes and coat."

            Abel scampered upstairs before she changed her mind.  He was back down as quick as he could, carrying the ratty thin piece of cloth that passed for his coat.  Although the only reasons why she would want him along were bad ones, she was still letting him come.

            Nire had to look twice to see what he was carrying.  "That's your coat?  Your winter coat?  The only one you have?"

            He looked at the old thing, suddenly shamed by it, and ducked his head, nodding.  It wasn't like he was out of the house enough to actually need one.  He never had enough for one, anyway.

            "You're going to *_freeze_*, kitty kat," Nire said.  "Jesus Christ.  Okay, first order of business is to find you a really cool, really warm winter coat."

            "I… I don't… I mean…" He was trying to say that he didn't have enough money to buy anything.  He needed to save all that he had so he could either start paying rent or move to an apartment.  He knew that Nick and Natalie would eventually get sick of having him taking up their space.

            "Doesn't matter, kitty kat."  She spread a couple of bills out over the end of the couch.  "I've got enough money for all three of us to have one kick-ass night on the town tonight, including buying whatever we want."

            Jander immediately snapped to attention as the money appeared.  "Where did you get that?"

            She made it disappear into her wallet, which was obviously stuffed with more.  She put that into her back pocket as she answered, the chain attached to her belt jingling.  "It's all legit and not stolen.  I promise.  Let's go!"

            Abel followed them down the lift.  Okay, so they were really allowing him to come.  And Nire *_said_* she was going to buy stuff for him.  What did she want from him in return?  Or was he really going to be that lucky?  Was he going to actually be allowed to do all the things 'normal' people did?  Nope.  That would never happen.  They merely needed someone to carry the bags, or something like that.  While Nire and Jander shopped, he would be stuck waiting outside with everything, praying that the wrong people didn't come by.

            As they stepped outside, a freezing cold gust of wind knifed through them.  It smelled like snow.  This was not going to be fun.  Perhaps he should just stay here.  But if they were allowing him to come… even if he could only look in the windows…

            "So, is there anywhere within walking distance?" Nire asked, glancing back at him.

            "I'm not sure," he said, cringing away as he walked with his head down.  "I've never tried."

            "Sweet.  This is going to be fun!" Nire began to whistle a jaunty tune, Jander quickly chiming in with the harmony.  They were a musical couple.

            Within two minutes, Abel was shivering violently.  He clenched his teeth to keep them from chattering.  It was really freezing out.  He was actually going to get out and go to a *_real_* place.  There was no way he was going to chance getting sent home.  Of course, odds were they wouldn't care.  But just in case… His entire body was going numb from the intense cold.  How could the two of them be talking and laughing and *_not* be cold?  Even in warm winter attire._

            Nire glanced back, attempting to pull him into the conversation.  But his miserable state changed the words that were coming out of her mouth.  "Jesus, kitty kat, why didn't you say something?  C'mere."

            She ignored the way he drew back from her hand and grabbed his arm, dragging him forward to walk beside her.  With a whimper, he shrank away fearfully.  His chattering teeth made the noise sound ridiculous, but Nire didn't laugh.  She shrugged out of her long coat and handed it to him.

            "Here.  Put that on, kitty kat.  You should have said something."

            "N-no I'm f-f-f-f-fine."  The protest sounded faked, even to his ears.

            "Male cow feces.  Take it."

            He hesitantly did as he was told, immediately warm all over.  This wasn't warm like a good coat; this was warm like he had his own personal space heater attached to his body.  As his hands and feet thawed, parts not covered by her coat still somehow warmed, they shot tingling pain through his body.

            "You warm now, kitty kat?" He nodded nervously to her question, wondering if she was going to take her coat back now.

            "You really are thoughtless sometimes, Nire," Jander said wryly, raising her hand and kissing her knuckles to take the sting out of his words.

            "Shut up," Nire crossly growled, loosely clasping Abel's hand so he couldn't drift behind them again.  "Certain people *_like_* freezing cold temperatures, and certain people also forget that others don't share the same opinion and they get cold."

            "I don't think you're allowed to refer to yourself as 'certain people'."

            "Sure I can.  I just did." Nire laughed and began whistling another song, her breath puffing out in white clouds.

            Abel finally allowed his finger's to curl around hers, waiting to see her reaction.  He was testing, against his better judgment, why she really wanted him along.  Not quite sure what her reaction would tell him, he still did it, never considering that what he really wanted was mere comfort.  Her hand was warm and dry.  How could that be?  It was freezing cold outside, and she didn't even have a sweatshirt on, but she looked all toasty warm.

            Nire squeezed his fingers slightly, then relaxed her hand.  He could pull away now if he wanted to, but… he didn't want to.

            "A'ight.  So, how 'bout if we go… somewhere and get you a coat, kitty kat, and then we can go get some breakfast.  And *_then* we do some serious shopping and touristing.  How does that sound?"_

            "Sounds good to me," Jander said in his silver voice.  "Even if 'touristing' isn't a real word."

            Abel kept quiet, not thinking she was asking him, too.  So he jumped a mile when she squeezed his hand gently to get his attention.  "How's that sound to you, kitty kat?"

            "To me?" he squeaked, immediately cringing away from her for asking a question.  A soft whimper escaped his mouth, but he didn't let go of her hand.

            "Yeah, kitty kat.  How's it sound to you?  I'm dragging you on this insane venture, so you get a say in this, too."

            "It s-sounds good."  His entire body begged for her to acknowledge that as the right answer.

            "All righty then!" A grin lit up her face, growing wider at his happy, relieved look.

            They walked.  And walked.  Abel was shorter and smaller than Nire, so not only was he swimming in the coat but the hem almost brushed the ground as he walked.  The pockets were weighed down and heavy with stuff.  Curiosity that he never acted upon made him wonder what was in there but he was too terrified to explore.  It smelled like Nire, which strangely relaxed him.  He decided that she must own a cat because, not only was here an extra feline scent to the coat, but there was short white hairs scattered randomly over it.  Not enough to make it look bad and grubby but enough to say that the wearer had a pet.

            "Well guys," Nire finally said, looking first at Jander, then at Abel.  "This was a stupid idea of mine, probably the stupidest yet.  How come no one ever tells me when I'm going to do something asinine?"

            Abel didn't dare answer, but Jander chimed in dryly.  "We do.  Then you ridicule us for your own stupidity in not seeing the brilliance of your plan."

            Nire laughed.  "True.  Too true.  Well, my friends, where do we wish to go?  A mall?  A street?  A plaza?  A- Okay.  I'm out of places.  What say you two?"

            "Doesn't matter, little one."

            Abel waited until she turned to look at him, making sure that she really was asking him.  "It doesn't matter to me, either."

            "Right.  Mall it is, then."

            She stopped, so fast that Abel took another step before being able to stop himself.  Then he hurriedly took a step and a half backwards so that he was slightly behind her, glancing up nervously to her face a couple times.  Why had she stopped?  Were they going to go back to the loft and get his car?  He didn't know where any of the malls in Toronto were, never being allowed out to places like that.  He kept his head down, studying the ground intently.

            "Give me half a tic to find us a mall," she said, her eyes closed in concentration.  Abel watched curiously as her brow crinkled slightly in concentration. What in the world was she doing?  And how could she find a mal like that?  A map, maybe… But he couldn't really question it.  She did what she did, she would protect him and hopefully, she wasn't going to hurt him.

            Her eyes snapped open.  "Right.  A mall.  Dufferin Mall.  Hm… I wonder how long it would take to walk there?"  She ginned slightly, her eyes sparkling at some inside joke.  "All right, we're taking as shortcut.  Ready, kitty kat?"

            He dared to look up at her.  Ready for what?  But still he nodded, cringing away from her, fearing what he was agreeing to.  Nire squeezed his hand gently, reassuringly.

            "Okay.  Do you believe in magic, chico?" She didn't wait for an answer before continuing.  "Well, regardless, I'm just going to make us a portal to this mall.  It will save us some walking.  Good plan?"

            He nodded again, only slightly less nervous.  It made no sense to him.  How would that save them walking?  More importantly, what was she talking about in general?  With another reassuring squeeze, she motioned with her left hand.  It looked like she had just wrapped an invisible rope around her arm and given it a healthy yank.  As she did that, he felt something right in front of them, sensed something that made him cringe away.  Nire waited patiently for him to regain what bit of courage and fortitude he had, then stepped forward, pulling him with her.  He felt the vampire following close behind him, but was too shocked by the sudden change in scenery to pay attention to the presence in close proximity to his back.

            They were standing in the shadows of a wall in some store.  There was no one within sight, but he could hear them.  Yelling parents, crying kids, a buzz of chattered conversations rising above the general babble.  He shrank back from it, glancing back quickly and stepping aside when he bumped into Jander.  Nire turned to face him, concern written across her face.

            "Is the mall a no, kitty kat?" she asked gently.

            He shook his head fiercely.  "Don't send me back to the loft," he begged, cringing away from her.

            Her quiet laugh made him flinch even more.  "I hadn't planned on it," she said soothingly.  "I was thinking that we could go wander around the streets for a while, if this is too much for you."

            Too much for him?  What did she mean by that?  Regardless of what it meant, he shook his head and whimpered, "No, I'm fine."  If she wanted to be in the mall, he didn't want her angry with him because of that.

            "You sure?" she asked once more.

            At his nod, she nodded once in approval, and turned away.  Jander's hand settled around her waist and she rested her head on his shoulder as they began to walk away.  Abel followed behind closely, not daring to assume he could walk beside them, but not wanting to get separated from the relative safety of Nire.

            "Right," Nire said, glancing over her shoulder at Abel.  "First we gotta figure out where- holy crap."  She stopped dead in her tracks, making Abel almost run into her.  He stopped just in time.  "We're in Wal-Mart.  We're in a fucking Wal-mart.  What kind of mall has a *_Wal-mart* in it?"_

            "Obviously a Canadian mall," Jander commented mildly.  "At least we're in the perfect place to find a good coat.  Right?" A brief look of confusion passed across his face before Nire confirmed what he said.

            "Hell yeah, my friend."  She looked back at Abel, grinning slightly.  "Ya know, in the States, the only people who shop at Wal-Marts are white trash.  Which really sucks," she mused, " 'cause the clothes last a whole hell of a lot longer than stuff from other places.  Is it the same in Canada?"

            He stared at her for a split-second before whimpering, "I don't know."

            "Cool," she said, her grin widening.  "Well, let's find out.  We're off to find the jackets," she sang, "the wonderful jackets of warmth.  Because, because, because, because, because, because of how cold it is outside.  Because it's so very cold."

            Abel smiled bemusedly as Jander chuckled and lovingly told Nire that she was a nut.  Nobody acted like they were supposed to anymore.  No yelling, no hitting, no fighting, no insulting.  There was no violence at all.  It was actually putting him on edge, making him more frightened and jumpy than usual.  They had to stop acting at some point.  The only question was, why were they acting?

            "Ha *_ha_*!" Nire crowed suddenly, startling him.  "Typical layout for Wally's.  Well, kitty kat, knock yourself out.  Go find a sweet-deal coat that you want."

            Abel stared at her, his crystal clear blue eyes for once meeting her gray ones, amazement clearly written across his face.  There was no way she was serious.  The look on his face quickly faded as he figured out their game.  They would allow him to browse and pick out something, then laugh in his face and cuff him a few times for good measure.  That was how the game would be played out, and the only thing he would get out of it were fresh bruises.  Those would seen be gone, depending on how bad they were.  And yet… He could pretend.  That might make it worthwhile.

            "I'm serious, kitty kat," Nire said when he didn't move.  "Go ahead, go find something.  And don't you *_dare* look at the price tag to see how much it is - that takes all the fun out of it."  And easy grin lit up her face._

            Realizing that he was staring, Abel quickly ducked his head, fixing his eyes on his own feet.  That sounded like it might have been an order.  So this was going to end in pain for him either way.  In a way, it would be a relief.  The longer the lack of violence, the worse it was when it finally erupted.  With a muffled sigh, he quickly began going through the racks.  Although he was trying not to get his hopes up, he couldn't help but look for something that he actually did like.  Just in case.  He went quickly, so the two who brought him would not get bored waiting.  When they decided the game was up, at least he would have something in his hands.

            Within a few seconds, he had found one that he actually really did like.  Maybe he would figure out where they were, and come back later to buy it.  Still, just in case, he pulled a medium of the black jacket off the rack.  When he turned to look at Nire, rolling his eyes up at her as his white-knuckled hands clutched the hanger, a look of fearful hope had filled his face.

            A gently smile spread across Nire's face.  "That is an awesome coat, my friend.  So, now that we got what we came for, do you want to look 'round here for a while, or go wander out there and see what other kickass stores we can find?"

            "Other stores?" he whimpered, not quite sure if she was serious.

            "Dude, hell yeah.  And don't say you don't care.  *_You* have to make a choice.  Got it?"_

            He drew away slightly.  Although the tone of her voice was kind, her words weren't.  How did she expect him to choose when neither gave him a sign as to which was the right answer?  Ah, of course, the guessing game, where both answers are wrong.

            "Other stores," he tried, attempting to sound definitive.

            With a grin, Nire nodded.  "All right, then, kitty kat, let's go pay for that.  Can I have my coat back?"

            Hurriedly, Abel fumbled out of the heavy, dark garment and handed it back to her.  When she turned with Jander at her side and strode away, coattails flapping, he followed close behind.  There was no way he was going to let them get too far ahead of him, wanting it clear that he belonged to them.  That way, no one could just show up and claim him as theirs.

            At the checkout, there were long lines at every register.  Trepidation marking every footstep, Abel followed them to the shortest of the ridiculously long lines.  Waiting, to make them irritable.  Wonderful.

            "Ah," Nire sighed sarcastically.  "The joys of shopping at Christmastime.  Jander-love?  What say you about going and finding some candy?  For later."

            "The usual, mon ange?"

            "Pick a language and stick with it, hon." Her voice held the sound of a long-standing, friendly argument.  "Yeah, the usual.  What do you want, chico?"

            Even though she was looking at him, Abel wasn't sure if she was *_talking* to him.  So he whispered, "Me?"_

            With an indulgent smile, Nire assured him, "Yeah, you.  Do you want any candy?"

            "Uh, no thank you," he stammered.

            As they got closer to the register, Abel began to fidget nervously.  This was much too good to be true.  When Jander came back with an armload of candy, Abel barely noticed him.  As their turn finally arrived, he rolled his eyes up at Nire, cringing when she reached out and ruffled his hair.

            "Put it up there, kitty kat, so I can pay for it."  The candy was already in a big pile.

            He watched in utter amazement as everything was run through and hastily bagged.  After bidding the cashier to have a merry Christmas, Nire grabbed all of the bags herself.  With a sinking heart, Abel followed them out into the main mall area.  Almost trodding on their heels, he stuck extremely close as they walked over to some empty benches.  There were too many people here, too large of a crowd.  He didn't like big crowds at all.  With everyone milling around and the loud Christmas music blaring over the loudspeakers, his nerves were on edge.  He should have *_known_* he wasn't really getting anything.

            Nire grinned as she dumped the bags onto the bench and pulled out the jacket.  "Here ya go.  Try it on, chico, make sure it fits."

            With trembling fingers, he took it from her and shrugged it on.  Was she seriously going to let him have *_new clothes*?  New *_comfortable_* clothes?  He kept his eyes on her the whole time, even as his mind was marveling over how nice something *__new* felt over his ragged T-shirt._

            "Does it fit?" Nire asked him.  After he nodded, she held out her hand.  "Lemme see it back for a sec, kitty kat."

            His face fell visibly as he handed it back to her.  Why had she bought it, then?  He felt a lump in his throat and his chin trembling.  Once more, he was expecting too much, forgetting that hey were just pretending, toying with him.  There were *_no exceptions_* to the rule of how people behaved, of how they acted and how they treated him.  Nire passed her hand over the fabric, muttering to herself, and snapped off the tag.

            "There ya go, kitty kat."  She handed it back to him.  "No matter how cold it is, you'll be warm.  Now, let's go get breakfast or something before this place closes.  What time is it?"

            "You have a watch," Jander commented in amusement as Abel pulled on his, *_his*, coat with a look of wonderment on his face._

            " 'S broken again.  Unless it really is noon 'r midnight."

            With a grin, Jander answered.  "Half-past eight."

            "Then let's go find food 'fore this place closes on us and we're locked in."

            She linked arms with Jander and grabbed the bag of candy.  As Abel hurriedly followed behind, he tried to figure out why they wanted him along.  So far, he didn't have to carry anything; Nire was buying stuff, why?  There *_had* to be a reason.  Wishing that Nire was holding his hand, actually *_wishing_* that, he followed as close as he could to them.  Too many people, too close, too many ways to be taken back.  Trying to tell himself there was no way he would see *_anyone_* in this mass of people, he lost his concentration on keeping close to Nire and Jander.  That split second was all it took for a family with four yelling kids, a group of giggling teenage girls, and a young couple to shove their way between him and his newest owners.  Wait.  When had *_they_* become his owners and not Nick and Natalie?_

            He tried to rejoin the two by saying 'excuse me; and waiting for people to let him through.  The Christmas crowds were an impenetrable mass of bodies.  He was not the modern Moses - this sea wouldn't part.  Already pale and shaking, he almost shrieked when someone grabbed his elbow.  When he turned, he paled even more and whimpered.

            This wasn't as bad as Kane.  Not quite.


	23. Chapter Twenty Three

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 23/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  I'm just having fun with them.  Judas is mine, a product of my sick and twisted imagination.  Rivendell Boulevard belongs to Rouen French.  The Monopoly comment and the Saddam Hussein comment are both stolen from Robin Williams.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thank you to the internet.  Yes, a retarded thing to thank, but still… I'm actually doing research for this, a major miracle.  So, yes, I am thanking the internet and Google and Toronto.com for their wonderful help in learning me stuff.  :-D

Author's Note:  NO!  This is the last day of vacation… I need another week before I'm ready to go back to school and deal with the incompetent assholes who call themselves my friends.  Anywho…

[_yada yada yada] stands for sign language._

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

            Cold eyes, so dark brown they were almost black, stared at him, a cruel smile on the man's face.  Not Kane, no, his best friend.  Irony of ironies, named Judas.  Long, thin fingers stroked Abel's cheek as he rolled his eyes, petrified.

            "Where have you been, Abey-baby?" A cultured voice that made people listen and struck terror through Abel.

            Within seconds, he was backed against the wall.  No one noticed anything; it was like they were invisible.  His terror went unheeded by everyone around them.  Once more, skeleton fingers dripped down his cheek and through his hair, painfully grasping a handful and pulling.

            "We've *_all_* missed you."  The cruel smile was growing wider and more wolfish.  Abel thought he was going to throw up.

            "There an issue here?"

            The oh-so-quiet voice managed to reach above the chatter of the crowd.  Abel rolled his eyes so he could see Nire.  Her eyes looked almost sleepy as she eyed Judas, who sneered at her.

            "Nothing's wrong here.  Just talking to my friend's brother."  He changed tactics immediately and smiled charmingly.  Abel whimpered, terrified.

            "Bull fucking shit," Nire said, her voice deceptively quiet.  "C'mere, Abel."

            He mewled, eyes rolling back and forth desperately in his head as he slid along the wall towards Nire.  As she grabbed him and drew him behind her, Judas turned to her in a courteous manner.

            "Ah, so you are his new owner."  The cold black eyes raked over Nire, assessing and judging, drawing conclusions.  Young but powerful domineering, easily able to control a weak plaything like Abel.  "I would like to put in a request to… borrow him for a few days."

            Once again, Abel mewled behind her, awaiting her inevitable agreement.

            "I don't think so," she said, her voice utterly emotionless.  The inhuman eyes that had been turned on Nick were now calming meeting the black eyes of Judas.  "Why don't you back off and go about whatever you were doing, ey?  He's mine, only mine."

            The thin-lipped mouth opened, shut, and opened again.  Well, then."  His eyes shot past her and bore into Abel.  "Know that we are coming.  Soon."

            Nire snickered.  "That's the lamest threat I ever heard."

            Without another word, Judas turned and walked away.  Half-whimpering, half-crying, Abel was shaking hard enough to earn curious glances from the people passing by.  Once she was sure the guy had really gone, Nire turned to the shivering man and held out her hand, patiently waiting.  He stared at it, pitiful sounds escaping his mouth in between gasps of breath.

            "Can I have your hand?" she asked in a soothing voice.  "That way these psycho shoppers can't separate you from us again."

            After looking around at the people who were crowding past them, making him cringe and whimper more every time they jostled him, he reached out hesitantly and took her hand.  He was shaking badly enough for Nire's hand to be trembling, too.  While her fingers were loosely curled around his hand, he locked his fingers around hers.  When Jander suddenly appeared, he whimpered and cringed away from the vampire.

            "He's on the other end of the mall," Jander's silken tones reported.

            "Easy there."  Nire tried to soothe Abel.  "He's on our side."  She squeezed his hand, drawing him gently out from behind her.  "Fuck this.  Let's go somewhere quiet for breakfast slash dinner."

            Whimpering quietly, Abel rolled his eyes up at her.  Thank God she was going to take him somewhere else.  He still felt like he was going to empty the contents of his stomach from fear.  Luckily, they were right next to an alcove that housed restrooms and a maintenance closet.  Nire led him down the very short hallway and, when they got to the end, they were suddenly standing in an alley, Jander soon behind them.  Breathing in short, hyperventilating gasps, Abel shrank away from him.

            "Abel, kitten, look at me hon." Nire's soothing voice and reassuring purr made him drag his eyes up to meet hers, knowing that was what she was expecting.  "Take a deep breath, okay?  Jander's on our side, cross my heart, hope to die."

            She gently squeezed his hand, trying to reassure and provide comfort without lots of physical contact.  After taking the deep breath she ordered, Abel tried to control his shivering.  It was hopeless; he just couldn't stop.  Ever so carefully, he inched his way closer to Nire.  He didn't have that far to go, and she was still holding his hand.  But he had to make his movements almost imperceptible.  If he brushed against her, and it looked like an accident, that would be okay, wouldn't it?  She couldn't get all that angry, and all he wanted was a moment of contact.  That was it.

            Nire did notice what he was doing, and squeezed his fingers again.  "C'mere, kitten."  She held out her other arm to him, patiently waiting as he hesitantly moved the half step closer to her.  Stiffening immediately when she hugged him, he slowly relaxed as she rubbed his back, murmuring in his ear.  While she was stroking his short hair and rubbing relaxing circles on his back, he let out a gasping sob and buried his nose in the junction of her neck and shoulder.  A deep inhalation brought her scent swirling through him.  He could feel the coiling in his stomach that usually brought on the Change, but this was a slightly different feel.  More like friendly curiosity, quickly settling.

            She smelled of so many things.  Every human, every were, every vampire, every *_being_* had their own personal scent, that often could be identified as a mix of several different everyday smells.  The predominant odors of vanilla and almonds relaxed him, and a flower that was either lilacs or lavender comforted.  While she felt like a were, she didn't smell like one.  But whatever it was she did smell like, it promised comfort and safety, a place to say without fear, laughter and warm milk.  Lies, lies, *_lies*.  All lies.  It couldn't be anything but._

            And yet…

            "What do you think, kitten?" Nire murmured, still petting him calmingly.  "Do you want to go back to the loft?"

            He whimpered, his shuddering slowly subsiding, the physical contact soothing him.  A slight shake of his head, still holding onto her, was his answer.  He did not want to go back to a place that crowded with people, but if she was going to continue to protect him and be this kind, he wanted to stay out.  The coat warmed him, Nire calmed him, he was good, even managing to stop shivering.

            "Well, then, kitten, what say you that we get out of this gross alley and see what street we're on, mmm?  That sound good?"

            After he nodded, Abel stepped away slightly, not letting go of her hand.  Until she let go and made it clear he was not welcome to be touching her anymore, he would welcome that tiny ounce of safety.  Smiling, Nire turned to Jander.  When she met his sad, silver eyes, the smile faded away to nothing.  With her other hand, she reached out and caressed his angular face, then took his hand and drew him to her other side.

            "Let us venture, my compadres," she said, squeezing both of their hands.

            Exiting the dark alley, Nire looked up and down the street, appraising where they were.  It was clean, well lit, with not too much traffic.  A good place to walk with Abel.  There was a street sign above their heads.  When Nire looked up at it, she gasped.

            "No fucking way," she breathed.  "Mother Night, we're on Rivendell Boulevard.  We're on Riven-fucking-dell Boulevard."

            Her voice held only frank amazement, so Abel did not cringe.  Not even her swearing made him flinch.  Although he didn't understand the importance of the street they were on, Nire was obviously happy about it.  And that made him more relaxed.

            With an indulgent grin, Jander soothed Nire's joyful swearing.  "Easy there, little one.  You promised us food first.  Then we'll let you drag us all over, okay?"

            Abel expected her to lash out for being told she could not do something.  He even cringed away slightly and loosened his grip on her hand.  But she laughed and pulled them forward with her into a pool of light.

            "Well then, my friends, let's go find somewhere to eat."  She led them down the street together, already humming a jaunty tune.

~~~~{@

            With a happy sigh, Natalie snuggled closer to Nick, running her hands down his flat stomach.  When they had come home, both deliriously happy, they found a note from Nire saying that the three of them were shopping and wouldn't be back for a while.  Taking them at their written word, Natalie and Nick used their time wisely.  What followed was the most passionate lovemaking Natalie could remember.

            Nick pressed a kiss to the top of Natalie's head, running his hands through her silky curls.  His fingers traced over the two delicate punctures on her shoulder.  A wave of happiness passed over him as he once again rolled over the thought that Natalie was going to be his wife.  She was going to marry *_him_*, a vampire.  He honestly didn't expect her to say yes, and now that she had, it blew his mind.  Beyond the fact that he was now the luckiest man on earth, there was so much that had to be planned.

            Not only was there whatever planning of the wedding that Natalie allowed him to be a part of, but the politics behind everything.  He would have to invite some of the Family - it was unavoidable.  And he dreaded, absolutely *_dreaded*, telling LaCroix.  That, too, was inescapable.  On occasion, the Roman's temper could be held in check by being informed of something up front.  Hearing of the wedding from another source would merely anger him more.  But that didn't mean there wasn't going to be some sort of repercussions._

            "Mm," Natalie murmured, moving to a slightly more comfortable position.  "We should probably get dressed before they get back."

            She could feel Nick's low laugh before she heard it.  "A teenage girl, a… an elf… that obviously won't say no to her, and a man who's to afraid to say anything?  Love, they're not going to be back until *_everything* is closed."_

            It was her turn to laugh slightly as she nuzzled his neck.  "It's midnight, hon.  Everything pretty much *_is* closed."_

            A wolfish smile spread across Nick's face.  No words were needed as he leaned in to devour her unresisting mouth - and body - once again.

~~~~{@

            Nick poured a tall glass of orange juice and set it on the counter, putting the almost-empty carton back in the fridge.  The sounds of the shower had stopped a few minutes ago, and he knew that Natalie would want a glass when she came downstairs.  Glancing at the clock, he saw that it was one in the morning.  The Raven was closed for renovations, and Janette would be there, overseeing what the workers were doing.  That is, assuming they hired vampires and not mortals.  Although she was back in town, they were basically avoiding each other.  Forgiveness takes time, no matter what the mind says.  But his sister would want to know of this, and perhaps she could help him figure out how to break it to LaCroix.

            "Whatever's wrong, you're probably over-thinking it."

            He started at Natalie's voice, having been deep enough in thought not to hear her come downstairs.  As she drank the orange juice, he returned to his musing.  Perhaps she was right.  Maybe he should just *_tell_* LaCroix and get it over with.  If he planned it right, when LaCroix was in the right kind of mood…

            Natalie watched Nick, worry clearly written across his face.  This was a change from the joyful union of less than an hour before.  Worry gnawed at the pit of her stomach.  After seeing her mangled body, had he changed his mind?  Now he could be trying to figure out how tot let her down easily.  With a minute shake of her head, she tried to banish those thoughts.  It was no use worrying until he said something that confirmed her suspicions.

            Wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her cheek on the middle of his back, she asked, "What's wrong, love?  What are you worrying that much about?"  Tendrils of dread were curling in the pit of her stomach; she couldn't decide if they were hers or Nick's.

            With a heartfelt sigh, Nick turned around to hold her, burying his nose in her soft curls and inhaling deeply.  "I just realized that I'm going to have to tell LaCroix that we're engaged."  He couldn't help but to grin when he said that.  It felt do good, rolling off his tongue.

            While that got Natalie's attention, it also made her relax.  LaCroix's deviousness was not to be underestimated, but at least Nick wasn't thinking of leaving. Or was he?  "We can't let him control our lives, Nick."

            "No, we can't."  Nick's voice was hard, uncompromising.  He was going to end his master's ridiculous hold over his life.  No more.

            But he would wait until LaCroix was in a good mood.

            Kissing Natalie, he walked over to the radio and flipped it on to CERK.  Perhaps right now would be a good time.

            "…sold for a song, taken back without a though.  Is no regard-"

            That was a definite no.  While LaCroix would never deny his daughter's rights to the Raven, he *_would* sulk over it.  A sulking LaCroix was an angry LaCroix, one not to be messed with.  Once the renovations were completed, he would be in a much better mood, having resigned himself to the fact that the club was once again Janette's.  A small price to pay to regain a daughter._

            With a sigh, Nick snapped off the radio and turned to Natalie, who was silently regarding him.  "Well?" she asked, knowing he had done that for a reason.

            "He's in a bad mood tonight," Nick replied darkly.  "I can't put it off for long, though."

            With a muted sigh, Natalie went and put her arm around him, nuzzling his cheek.  He really knew how to bring down a happy mood.  "Don't worry about it.  Everything will be all right."

            Nick grinned, tilting his head down and kissing her lips lightly.  He couldn't worry about things like that when she was in his arms.  But eventually, he would have to deal with it.  And LaCroix did not like to be the last to know anything.

            Attempting to change the subject and get Nick's mind off worrying about LaCroix, and because she was honestly worried about it, Natalie mused aloud, "I wonder where they are?"

            Nick shrugged, completely unworried.  "Trust me when I say that they can take care of themselves."

            Studying him carefully, she commented, "You know something I don't."

            Nick could only bite his tongue and shake his head, figuring that a little white lie wouldn't hurt.  "No, I don't.  But…just trust me.  Please?  Speak of the Devil…"

            The lift began running, faithfully carrying its passengers up to the living floor of the expansive warehouse.  Natalie was relieved that they were back.  She couldn't help but to worry about Abel.  Every mothering instinct she had screamed that he needed to be taken care of like a child.  As the door rolled open, they both could hear Nire talking.

            "Wanna know another reason why us stupid Americans are the most fucked up people on earth?  The Secretary of Defense, or some kooky guy in the government with a similar job, *_publicly* approved the *__secret* plan to assassinate Saddam Hussein.  Gee, I wonder if he knows…"_

            Abel's quiet, timid giggle could be heard, along with Jander's silver laugh.  "Sure, M'ija.  Why don't you just run the country?"

            "In a conversation between some senator and Bill Gates, the senator asked, 'Are you trying to create a monopoly over the computer industry?'  Gates answered, 'Monopoly's just a game, Senator.  I'm trying to control the fucking world.'  The States are just one country, my friend."

            Jander laughed again, and Abel giggled.  As they came out of the lift, Natalie noticed that Abel was the only one with any bags.  Angry that they were making him carry everything, she opened her mouth to say something.  Nire, however, beat her to the punch.

            Abel was standing by the lift uncertainly, watching Nire and Jander.  Grinning, Nire turned to him.  "Go put your bags upstairs, kitten, if you want to."

            Smiling hesitantly at her, he disappeared upstairs.  Natalie stared after him as Nick asked the question she wanted to ask.

            "Did you buy anything for yourselves?"

            Jander nodded and answered as Nire yawned tiredly.  "Yes, but we… sent our purchases home.  So we didn't have to carry them."

            Nire snorted.  "Yeah.  More like we *_couldn't* carry the shit, so we had to get rid of it."  She yawned again.  "Dios Mio, I'm tired.  Dren, man what did you slip in my soda?"_

            With an easy smile, Jander continued the light banter that had been going on all night.  "That's for me to know and you to never find out.  Go take a nap, little one."

            As Nire walked over to the couch, almost like she owned the place, Natalie noticed that she wasn't limping anymore.  Refraining from commenting, even though her curiosity was peaked, she twisted the ring around her finger, leaning back into Nick's embrace for a moment of comfort.  She was going to become Mrs. Knight.

~~~~{@

            Standing in front of the lift, Abel whimpered softly to himself.  He did not want to go to work tonight.  Not if it meant he was going to be all alone.  Unfortunately, he couldn't take the night off, not if he wanted to take tomorrow night off.  His stomach twisted unhappily at that thought, making him feel sick again.  Once more, he tried to force himself to go out the door.

            "Whassa matter, kitten?"

            He jumped and whirled around, visibly shaken, while his stomach did a disturbing flip-flop.  He had been concentrating so hard on forcing himself into the lift that he hadn't heard Nire come downstairs.  Another quiet whimper escaped his mouth.

            "Oh, kitten," she said sympathetically.  She seemed to instinctively know what was the matter.  "I can't promise that they're not going to get you, or that you're not going to get hurt.  And I know that promises probably don't mean all that much to you.  But whoever touches you will have to answer to me.  And it won't be pretty for them, that I promise you."

            He believed her, but it was only slightly reassuring.  She could not understand how they acted, how they could so easily get their hands on him and he would disappear.  Judas would come for him now, having been embarrassed in the mall.  For Judas would consider Nire's refusal to be an embarrassment.  And if Kane got out…

            But he had to go.  With another whimper, he glanced up at Nire and tried to smile.  It was a failed attempt, his face miserable.  Ducking his head again, he stepped into the lift.  He was a doomed man.

~~~~{@

            They were in the middle of a conversation.  Natalie was upstairs, leaving Nick to entertain the two visitors.  He didn't mind - the exchange was proving to be relatively interesting.  Although how he managed to get into a philosophical debate with a teenager was a quandary.  Seemingly randomly, Nire eased her revolver out of its holster and pressed down on the cylinder release catch, holding her hands over the cylinder to muffle the sound.  When Nick opened his mouth to ask what she was doing, she shook her head sharply, continuing on with their discussion as she checked to make sure everything was in properly.

            "I'm going to have to respectfully disagree with you there.  It all depends on the time period and the society."  She talked as though nothing was happening.  Nick watched her with confusion as she silently slid her gun back out of sight.  "To the Muslims, it was perfectly acceptable to have multiple wives.  In terms of world history, it's only been relatively recently that such a practice is deemed as wrong"

            As she spoke, her fingers were moving fluidly, spelling out words to him using the sign language alphabet.  Luckily, he knew the alphabet, so he knew what she was doing.

            [_Is your gun on you?]_

            He nodded, cocking his head quizzically as he picked up the conversation.  "But all along, it was morally wrong."

            "But nothing," she interrupted, silently asking if it was loaded.  "To *_you*, and today's society, it is.  But then, it was fine morally, too."  A significant look was shot at Jander, to which he nodded and went upstairs.  Nick could hear quiet murmuring, and Natalie moving about, but he could not understand their words.  When he stood up, concerned, to follow, Nire shook her head vehemently and pointed back to his seat.  Reluctantly, he sat down again, asking, [__What's wrong?]_

            [_Wait and listen.  And talk like nothing's wrong.]_

            "Back in the time of Greece and Rome," she continued, "infanticide was considered morally right and was a common practice.  Up until Muhammad came along, it was morally okay to kill girl children and to practice _sati_."

            "In the Bible…" Nick tried, drifting off to let her interpret what he was about to say, as he listened intently.  He couldn't hear anything, so how could she?

            "In the Bible," Nire repeated scornfully.  "In the Bible, it says that a wife owes her husband sex, that she can't refuse."

            That was something Nick did not talk about, his upbringing still having a firm control over his level of comfort in speaking of sex in front of women and children.  "That- that depends on your interpretation," he said.

            With a cocked head, Nire concede his point.  "Aye, that's true.  But my point is that religion is open for interpretation, unless you're Catholic," she snickered, "and that what's morally acceptable varies with that translation.  Aren't human morals largely dependent upon what is acceptable according to their religious texts?"

            Searching for a safe argument, Nick said, "Well murder is always wrong.  Inside, everyone knows what is right and what is wrong."

            "So you're against the death penalty?" she asked him evenly.

            "No.  But that's-"

            "Murder," she finished for him.

            Ready with a response, it died on his lips as he heard a group of people sneaking up the back stairs.  They were actually coming up.  This was ridiculous.  He could hear Natalie murmuring softly again, but once more he couldn't make out the words.  He could feel her fear, though, as Jander's murmuring answered her, and attempted to reassure her through the link between them that was constantly growing.  It worked minutely well.  He should be upstairs with her.  But the people outside had abandoned stealth and were almost at the top.  Sill, he stood, his beast flaring.  He could take them all out the top of the stairs.  How *_dare* they try to invade his home!_

            An ice-cold hand gabbed his wrist, empty gray eyes staring at him.  As he heard the security code being punched in, she let go and stood.  He didn't have time to ponder over that; the door opened, and they were on high alert.


	24. Chapter Twenty Four

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 24/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.  I'm just having fun with them.  The song "Rockabye" belongs to Sean Mullins.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to Mike and April, who are the only people giving me good reviews.

Author's Note:  I GOT IN!!!!!  Nire got in!!!!  Yes!!  ::cheers::

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

            Abel came through first.  His face was white as a ghost, making his black hair and blue eyes all the more striking.  He appeared relatively unharmed, although he was shaking like a leaf.  His eyes pleaded with them to save him and to hurry.  Before either of them could do anything, a group of people poured in after him, guns in hand.  Ref-heads, brunettes, blondes, men, women, vamps, and mortals.  They were all there.  Kane came to stand right behind his brother, throwing off Nire's first prediction.

            "Come down here, kitten."  Nire motioned to Abel as relief lit up his eyes.

            The relief died, panic replacing it, when Kane's hand clamped down on his shoulder.  A cruel smile slowly formed on the fugitive's face.  In the blink of an eye, Nick's gun was out and aimed, Nire's appearing at the same time.  Anticipating the words to come next, Kane forcible jerked Abel in front of him as a shield.  Abel mewled and stumbled, the look of a cornered rabbit filling his face.  Nick now could not shoot Kane without running the risk of hitting Abel.

            "Let him go," Nick said evenly.

            "Why should I?" Kane asked in a voice that could only be described as evil.

            Unfortunately, Nick did not have an answer to that.  Right now, they had the advantage.  They hadn't even *_done_* anything, and they had the advantage - in numbers, in strength, in position.  They were between him and Natalie, but at least he hadn't seen any of them leaving the group to go find her.  They seemed to be focusing on him and Nire.  Watchful eyes, some nervous, some cold, some cruelly confident, focused on the two of them, almost like they were a pack of hunting animals… The five vampires were calculatingly bored, but watchful underneath.  They knew the danger Nick could be, no matter how little they respected him.

            Someone in the back of the group, some cocky, arrogant soul, took it upon himself to speak up, taunting Nire.  "Why don't you put down the gun, little girl, before you hurt yourself."

            Although directed at Nire, the condescending tone rubbed Nick the wrong way.  He noticed the fierce glare shot towards the man by Kane as his mind distantly picked up the sound of a gunshot.  It wasn't until the man who had spoke dropped to the floor, a perfectly round hole in the middle of his forehead, that Nick realized Nire had shot him.  They reaction from everyone on the catwalk was immediate - guns slithered from holsters and focused on the girl.  Kane raised his hand at the same time, stopping most of them in mid-motion.  Whimpering uncontrollably, Abel cringed away from the raised hand.  No longer did coherent thoughts run through his head.  Fear and overwhelming despair robbed him of speech.

            "Kindly remove that limp piece of flesh attached to the end of your arm from Abel's shoulder," Nire said in a voice that dripped icy poison, "and maybe I'll let you live."

            "You don't have a shot," Kane sneered.

            "So?" Nire shrugged easily, uncaringly.  Nick had to control his urge to stare at her in shock.  Who's side was she on?  With cold-blooded accuracy, she had taken down one of them just for a comment made.  But he was relived to see that Kane, after a moment's consideration, dropped his hand and stepped back.  A shudder, worse than the trembling that was constantly shaking him, ran through Abel's body.

            "Come down here, kitten."  Nire's voice was once again warm and gentle.

            Abel didn't get the chance to move.  At a flick of Kane's fingers, a black-haired woman darted forward and *_threw* Abel from the catwalk.  He landed on the floor by the speakers with a sickening crack of braking bone, crying out sharply.  Then he fell silent._

            The opposing forces broke then, knowing that this would be their only chance.  The vampires focused their malignant attentions on Nick, swooping down from the catwalk like vengeful rocs of destruction.  Nick had his hands full dealing with them.  If Nire couldn't handle the rest herself, oh well.  There wasn't much he could do, even if he wanted to.  But he was pretty confident that she could take care of herself.

            As if to attest to that, he could hear her chattering on as gunshots were fired.  "Hey Kane the Vain, wassup with all this?  Man, did you even know there was more people here other than Nick, him?  This is pretty pathetic to be trying to lay the smack down on one measly vampire.  A bit worried about your strength, ey?  Hey!  Don't you be shootin' that damn gun at me!  Bang bang, you're dead.  Hey kitten, what say you?  Leave 'em alive but down for the count?  Or blow their fucking heads off?"

            Barely audible above the chaos of gunshots, he could hear Abel whimpering on the ground, repeating over and over, "Kill them, kill them, kill them."

            His own problems drew his attention back to the vampires.  No one had gone to find Natalie.  Why not?  He could feel her fear, but it was more from the noise downstairs than anything else.  That and knowing that Kane was a mere floor below her.  And Nire had been right, voicing what he had been wondering since seeing Kane's entourage.  He could understand the man coming on his own, but bringing an attack force?  His famous 'hunches' were telling him there was something wrong with the whole thing.  Maybe it was just the fact that this man was obviously highly intelligent and highly manipulative.

            As Nick dodged the flying vampires, he realized quickly that this wasn't going to be a fight the way he was experienced - a battle with LaCroix.  When the first one lunged at him, fangs extended and snarling, it was driven home that this was for real.  This was no LaCroix, seeking to teach him a lesson or playing some sick game.  This was real, and he dodged accordingly, one hands lashing across the vampire's face.  First blood hit the floor, splashing outward, running in little droplets away from the gashes.

            Laughing silently, looking oddly like grinning hyenas, one of them lunged at him.  The acrid smell of gun smoke burned his nostrils as he tried to dodge again, staying on the defensive.  A sharp, burning pain in his abdomen made him glance down to see a wooden stake sticking out from just below his bottom rib.  Snarling as he ripped it out, he fired his gun, loaded with Nire's bullets.  Shoulder-length auburn hair swirled around the pretty-boy's face as he stumbled backwards, an ululating wail emanating from his mouth as he clawed at his stomach, tearing the gaping hole wider.

            Fighting, killing vampires, was oh so different from mortals.  He had no moral qualms about the death of one of the undead.  They were the perversions of nature, the evil.  *_He* was one of them.  He did not have the advantage any longer.  It became a matter of survival.  He knew that one way to kill a vampire, to finally send it to its final rest, was to cut off its head, to completely decapitate the body.  Judging from the hole in the stomach of the vampire who had stabbed him, whatever Nire had given him to load his gun with exploded on impact.  Fending off the other vampires through hissing and lunging, he fired at the vampire's head.  It blew to smithereens, the body already beginning to disintegrate to ash._

            The other four stopped playing games with him and attacked from all four sides.  Whirling as fast as he could, barely faster than the young ones surrounding him, Nick slashed at them with his hands.  They were too close for him to get off a shot.  Wood slivers pierced his clothing and his skin, sticking into him painfully.  It wouldn't be long before one got lucky and reached his heart.  Throwing himself backwards, he bowled over one of them, bring up his arm and hitting another across the face.  Now he had room to move.

            Unfortunately, he was also backed into a corner.  Firing off four rounds, three of the vampires dropped.  Ashes to ashes.  The last vampire, a little Asian man, managed to successfully dodge the bullet and lunged at Nick.  Sharp fingernails raked down his chest, slicing through his shirt and piercing his kind.  A sharp, piercing pain bellow the third button of his shirt made him jerk his hand down, the barrel of his gun connecting with the vampire's wrist.  He heard it snap and fall away, then jerked out the short stick.  The blood spread slowly in an ever-widening circle on his shirt, but he could feel the wound already closing.  He shoved the bloody stake back into the Asian vampire, making a mirror wound.  With a gasp of pain and wild, saffron eyes, the vampire clutched at his chest.  Nick had made contact with the heart.  To finish it off, he fired the last round into the vampire's skull.

            The sudden stillness was deathly.  Nick's Beast slowly receded, allowing him to look around and *_see*.  Five piles of ash.  Dead bodies littering the floor, blood pooling.  Nire was sliding across the floor on her knees, skidding to a stop by Abel's side.  Since he could feel that Natalie was perfectly fine, worried for him and Abel but fine, he too went to Abel's side.  The young man was shaking, crying silently.  Kane's dead body was lying a couple feet away, a gaping hole in his chest._

            Abel's eyes were unfocused, staring up at the ceiling but not seeing it.  He didn't even react when Nire began to stroke his hair.  The only way Nick could tell he was alive was the incessant shivering and his heartbeat.  Ever so carefully, Nire turned his head so he was looking through her.

            "Hey kitten, look at me, sweetheart.  You have to tell me what hurts."  She continued to run her hands through his hair and to speak to him, patiently waiting for his eyes to focus on her.

            Nick looked around the loft.  He needed to call the hospital, get an ambulance.  There was no way that Abel could have been thrown off like that and not be hurt.  But the carnage made it difficult - there would be questions.  And while he could explain, it did not look like the kind of thing one man could do.  Besides that, he couldn't find the phone.  While there was little actual damage done, there were artifacts strewn randomly around the big room.  He was about to get up to go look for it and check on Natalie when Abel's eyes finally came into focus.

            "I can't feel my legs," he whispered, his voice full of fear, tears pouring from his eyes.  Now he flinched from Nire's touch.  "I can't feel them."

            "Yeah, I know kitten," Nire said soothingly.  Her eyes met Nick's grimly.  If he couldn't feel them, odds were his spinal cord had snapped and his backbone was broken.  "Listen to me, sweetheart, okay?  You have to shift, or else your back is going to heal all screwed up."

            Abel whimpered unhappily, his teary eyes never leaving Nire's face.  She caressed his cheek, gently brushing away the tears.

            "Yeah, I know.  But listen.  There's really nothing else we can do.  I'm going to put you to sleep, okay?  And then we'll move you outside.  But you *_have* to promise me not to fight it.  It hurts when you fight it, okay kitten?"_

            Once more, he whimpered, this time in fright.  Nick tried to figure out what the hell was going on.  Abel needed a hospital.  What the hell was she talking about?  When Nire lifted her hand again, Abel cringed away from it.  The only way he knew of to knock someone out was a swift blow to the temple.

            But Nire smoothed back his hair lovingly, singing softly.  "Everything's gonna be all right / Rock-a-bye / Rock-a-bye / Everything's gonna be all right / Rock-a-bye / Rock-a-bye / Rock-a-bye."  When she brought her hand down over his eyes, his breathing slowed and his eyelids closed.

            He was either deeply asleep or unconscious.

            "How did you-" Nick began, shocked.

            Nire immediately shushed him, speaking in quiet tones.  "I don't know how easy he'll be to wake up, so keep your damn voice down.  I don't know how I do it, I just do it."

            "We need to call an ambulance," Nick said quietly.  "Where's the phone?"

            Nire shrugged.  "Somewhere in the mess.  And the last thing he needs is a doctor prodding at him.  Take a leap of faith and *_please_* believe me on this.  You gotta carry him outside, okay?  'Cause if I make him shift here, he'll freak 'cause of the mess."

            "Make him shift?" Nick wasn't going to do anything until he got some answers.

            Nire nodded, speaking quickly.  "Bring out his were form.  It'll fix whatever's wrong with his back, but if it's not done soon, it'll heal that way and someone'll have to rebreak it.  He's got quick healing, like you."

            That was the correct phrase to get Nick moving.  In the past, some of his broken limbs had healed wrong and they had to be rebroken and set straight again.  It was one of *_the_* most painful things he had ever gone through, and he could only imagine the pain a broken back would cause.  And while the last thing he wanted to do was leave Natalie alone in the loft, Jander was up there.  Since she was still alive and unharmed, he had to assume she was well protected.  Gently picking up the dead weight, praying he wouldn't awaken, Nick cradled Abel in his arms and carried him over to the lift.  Nire followed closely behind, and he could hear her reloading her gun- guns?  She had more than one?

            "Lie 'im down," Nire directed when they got out into the grimy street.

            Since she seemed like she knew what she was doing, he did as she said.  Nire knelt down beside Abel, stroking his hair again, coaxing him awake.

            "Kitten, wake up, sweetheart."

            His eyes fluttered open, and he whimpered again.  With amazement, he realized that she hadn't hurt him to knock him out.  But now, what she was going to do… Absolutely terrified, he whimpered again.

            "I promise you, kitten, it's gonna be okay.  If you don't fight it, it doesn't hurt."   His eyes rolled in his head, anyway.  And while Nire wished to God she could calm him down, there wasn't that much time.  "Being a leopard is the most kickass thing ever, at least when you're around sane people it is.  Ready?"

            He whimpered again, looking at Nick.  His eyes didn't hold a request for Nick's help, but pure and blatant fear.  Fear of Nick.  Nire, too, looked up at Nick and then glanced meaningfully down to Abel.  He understood the hint and… and he trusted her.  He felt that he could leave Abel alone with her.

            "We'll be back around dawn, okay?" Nire begged him with her eyes to leave quickly.

            With a nod, Nick moved back.  "Have fun, guys."  He needed to check on Natalie, anyway.

            "Um, listen."  Nire spoke quickly as he held the door open.  "I doubt you're gonna want to deal with all the bodies and all the issues that will come with having officials around.  So, ya know, just let Jander deal with them?"

            Nick nodded and let the door to the lift close.

~~~~{@

            The knock came on the bedroom door when Natalie was in the middle of a sentence in one of her 'dead body' magazines.  Coroners needed to stay updated just as much as doctors did.  She dropped the magazine on the bed before asking who was there.  She would guess Abel.

            The liquid-silver voice that answered was a surprise.  "It is Jander.  May I come in?"

            Slightly nervous, she opened the door, blocking it with her body.  "Why?"

            Backing up, Jander spoke quickly and quietly.  "Kane broke out of prison.  Nick can hear him and what appears to be backup coming up the back stairs.  He sent me up to protect you while he and Nire take care of the issue."

            "Why?  Why would he do that?"  Natalie could feel the first pricking of fear.

            With a shrug, he indicated his lack of insight into the mind of criminals.  "Because you embarrassed him by getting away?  He is seeking revenge?  I do not know - that is Nire's area of expertise.  Are there other rooms up here?  Where they would not think to look?"

            Numbly, Natalie nodded.  She reached out to Nick for comfort, and to make absolutely sure that Jander was telling the truth.  Unfortunately, it was the truth, and she could feel Nick's worry.  Warm, comforting tendrils curled through her as Nick tried to reassure her.  Only slightly calmer, and wishing he was up here with her, she led Jander back through this upper level of the loft.  She allowed him to scope out the rooms before he found one that suited their needs.  Windowless, one door, junk in the back.  It was a good place to make a last stand if it came to that.

            Jander shut the door behind them and took a tour of the room once more.  Satisfied, he folded his long legs and sat on the floor, producing a deck of cards from his pocket.  As he shuffled them, he motioned her over.

            "Would you like to play a game of cards?  It is most likely that we will be up here for a while."

            She sat down gingerly, keeping a light mental contact with Nick.  The sounds of people opening the door on the catwalk could be heard.

            "What do you want to play?" Jander asked, apparently oblivious to the noises in the rest of the loft.  "War… Slap Jack… Poker… I can teach you a game…"

            "War," she replied absently.  She wouldn't have to concentrate to play, which meant she could listen to what was going on downstairs.

            A few attempts were made by Jander to engage her in conversation.  While, in the back of her mind, she knew that she could use this time to learn more about these two strange visitors, she just couldn't concentrate and gave short answers.  She played the game mechanically, listening to the murmurs of voices and trying to make out their words.  When the gunfire started, she jumped visibly, her head swinging to focus on the door.  While she wanted to go and see what was going on, logic kept her put.  Jander, too, looked nervous, which didn't help.  He began to drum his fingers on his legs, which *_did_* distract her because it was so annoying.

            "Would you stop that?" she snapped as an ululating wail rose above the chaos.  It didn't sound like Nick, which slightly reassured her, but it could still be Abel or Nire.

            A sheepish grin briefly crossed the golden vampire's face.  "My apologies.  I am used to being down there with her.  And our last battle involving the nosferatu did not go well.  You can see why I would be nervous."

            Sure, she could see, but she didn't care.  The gunfire continued unabated, cries occasionally rising above it.  They both gave up any pretense of playing the card game and listened intently.  The sudden silence, when it finally came, was almost heart stopping.  Was Nick okay?  How many bullets would she have to pull out of him?  Did he kill Kane?  That sounded like an awful lot of action for just trying to kill one person.  Worried, wanting to check on Nick, she stood.

            Immediately, Jander grabbed her ankle.  She froze in fright, and he let her go.  His silver eyes stared up at her, and apology in them.  "Do not go out there yet.  We wait for someone to come get us."  His voice was barely audible.

            But, she supposed that was what made the most sense.  It could be some sort of trap.  So, she sat back down.  But she made absolutely sure that she stayed out of Jander's reach.  He may mean no harm, but… The sound of the lift startled her.  She listened closely as it traveled to the bottom and stopped.  After a few moments, it came up again.  Glancing at Jander, she saw that he seemed more relaxed.  Could he sense that the fight was over and who won?  Footsteps sounded coming up the stairs.  Although she recognized them as Nick's, could she really be sure?  Jander was sitting calmly - but that didn't mean anything.  He could really be on their side, sent to … infiltrate the loft.  She had to choke back a laugh as soon as that thought crossed her mind - it was ridiculous.

            When the door was opened, Nick stood there.  Before she could register *_how_* he looked, she had gotten up and run over to him, throwing herself into his arms.  Nick muffled a groan as she did so.  There were definitely wooden splinters still stuck in him, left from when he jerked out the stakes.  And he thought he could feel one or two bullets that he hadn't noticed striking him.  Still, he wrapped his arms around her and buried his nose in her neck, inhaling her calming scent.  She was okay, she was safe, and he would make sure she stayed that way.

            As soon as she realized what a state Nick was in, Natalie loosened her death grip on him.  His shirt was ripped and bloody in multiple places.  While his skin was unbroken, there were dribbles of smeared, dried blood marring his smooth skin.  Before he started drinking human blood again, he healed a *_lot_* slower.  She still had time to get bullets out before the wounds closed.  But now, she had to go digging.  And the bullets would *_move_*, be pushed by the healing flesh.

            "Did you get shot?" she asked, resting her cheek on his chest.

            An easy, reassuring smile filled Nick's face.  Whenever his precious Natalie was frightened, disturbed, or couldn't handle what was happening, she retreated back into her shell of a scientist and caregiver.  For once, he was glad of that - she would be less inclined to go downstairs.

            "A few bullets, a few slivers."  He nuzzled her cheek.  "Nothing major."

            With a snort, Natalie stepped away from him.  "And I suppose you need me to remove them."

            "If you would be oh so kind as to."  He smiled charmingly at her.

            And answering grin spread across her face, but it quickly faded.  "Where's Abel?"

            "Nire took him out for a walk to calm him down.  They're both fine.  Jander-"

            "I know," the other vampire interrupted.  "I could hear her."  He slipped out by them.

            "Where's he going?" Natalie asked Nick as he rocked back and forth, hugging her tightly.  She wasn't quite sure who needed the most comfort and reassurance.

            "To clean up downstairs.  Don't worry about it."

            "But-"

            Nick shushed her with a needy kiss.  He knew that Natalie thought she could handle whatever was downstairs, thought that this could be taken care of officially, and she could handle it.  But she did not understand, she *_could* not understand, how different blood and violence was when it was in your own home.  The last thing he wanted was for her to have to see the bloody mess downstairs and have that image haunting her dreams.  He could only pray that Nire knew what she was talking about and that Jander would leave Kane's body alone.  While he knew how hard it was to fake a crime scene and to doctor one properly, he would place money on a bet that said that the two visitors had much practice.  There was something about them… For all of Nire's annoyingness, and bossiness, and interference, he was *__extremely* glad that she and Jander had been there.  He did not know if he could have handled *_that_* many people without backup, and he didn't want to find out.  If Jander did this right, then that would be that many less people he would have to worry about whammying._

            When they broke away from the deep kiss, he kissed the tip of her nose.  "How about if we go into the bedroom and remove all of this shrapnel from my poor, abused body?"

            Nick led her to their bedroom a back way so there was no chance that she could see the carnage downstairs.  While she gave him a funny look, she followed without comment.  Maybe he was being overprotective, and maybe he was underestimating her.  But he was not going to risk it.  Not with his precious Natalie.

            When he took off his shirt and sat on the bed, Natalie gasped at the sheer amount of blood caking him.  It was like mordant icing on an exquisite cake.  She searched for her doctor's bag, the one with everything in it that she used to care for Nick when he was hurt.

            Looking at his chest and back again, she tried to suggest, "Nick, maybe some curare-"

            "No," he immediately said.  "Don't I need to tell you where it hurts?"  His classic, boyish grin lit up his face.

            She sighed at his stubbornness and began digging for foreign objects.

(A/N:  If anyone wants to know just what the fuck Abel and Nire are doing, email me.  If I get enough people saying they want to know, I'll write it.  Otherwise, I'm not wasting my time writing something no one's going to like.)


	25. Chapter Twenty Five

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 25/?

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to Mike and April, who are the only people giving me good reviews.

Author's Note:  Ugh, shoot me now, my life sucks.  Have fun reading this.

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

            The phone began to ring as Nick stepped out of the shower.  It was his cell phone in his pants.  While he wrapped a towel around his waist, he grabbed it and flipped it open.

            "Detective Knight."  He didn't have a shift tonight, at least, he thought he didn't.  And hadn't he turned his phone off?

            "Knight!" Reese's voice wasn't quite panicked, but certainly worried.  "The bastard killed the guard and escaped.  We think-"

            "Gee, thanks Captain," Nick interrupted dryly.  "You're a bit late with the warning, though."

            There was a moment of shocked silence on the other end.  "Did he get into the loft?  Is Natalie okay?  Did you arrest him?"

            "Yes, yes, and you could say that."

            "Explain that."  Nick could tell that Reese was greatly relieved, much of the tension gone from his voice.

            "Well, Mr. Belasarius is no longer among the living.  You might want to send the Coroner's Wagon over."

            There was a long silence on the other end of the line.  Nick walked back to the bedroom, where Natalie was once more reading her magazine, and pulled on a pair of clean boxers and jeans.  He could feel her appraising eyes on him as he got dressed, waiting for Reese to speak again.

            "Well."  The captain's voice was finally heard.  "I can't say that I'm sorry, or that I wish you hadn't shot him.  But department policy… What if you take another week or so of vacation time.  At least until the IA gets done with their investigation that's sure to come."

            "Sure, Captain."  Nick's voice was pleasant, but he was growling angrily inside.

            "Knight.  *_I_* know you had every right to shoot the bastard.  But you know the IA…"

            "They're just doing their jobs."  Right.  Wannabe cops.  Failed out of the Academy, so they took their revenge on those who made it.  Sneaky little conniving bastards.

            "Yeah, well… Good work, Knight."

            As Nick hung up his cell phone, he began to curse in French.  Natalie peered at him from above her magazine.  "What's wrong?"

            "Reese," Nick growled.  "He's sending people to pick up the body."

            "And why is that a bad thing?"  She knew there would be more to the story.

            "Oh, no, it's not that."  Nick flopped down on the bed beside her.  "When a civilian shoots a trespasser who's threatening them, the civilian's all in the clear.  But if it's a cop, the IA's *_all_* over the cop."  Normally, he would be relatively calm, almost indifferent to an IA investigation.  *_But, for Christ's sake, I just got engaged! _* he thought moodily.  Was he never allowed a brief bit of happiness?  Was that just too much to ask for?

            "Ah."  Natalie snuggled into his arms for the brief moment that he remained next to her.  But he was soon up and moving towards the door.

            "Stay up here, Nat, okay?"

            With a frustrated sigh, she nodded.  He had made her *_promise_* that she was going to stay upstairs until everything was taken care of.  And he had been so vehement about it, that she didn't argue much.  Truthfully, she was glad that she had an excuse to hide in the bedroom.  The last thing she wanted was to see… was to see *_his_* body in her home.  It was bad enough just thinking about it.  She stifled a shiver, returning to her magazine.

            Satisfied that she wasn't going to budge, Nick went out onto the catwalk and down the stairs.  The sight of the main living floor absolutely astounded him.

            All of the bodies were gone, save one - Kane's.  The blood was cleaned, save for a *_very* realistic-looking stain around the remaining body.  There was even spatter in what appeared to be the correct pattern.  The ash was gone, and the room looked like there had been a struggle._

            "Where are the bodies?"

            "In another warehouse, a few ways down."  Jander's reply was calm as he surveyed the room.

            "And the removal of the blood will stand up to inspection?"

            Jander nodded absently.  "It will not glow in… in that light, if that is what you mean."

            Nick looked around once more, inspecting the work the other vampire had done.  If he could get through tonight without whammying anyone…

            "Do you need a story?"

            The elven vampire's voice jerked him out of his thoughts.  "What?"

            "A story of what happened.  Do you need one, or can you make one up yourself?"

            "Oh."  Duh.  "I can invent one.  From her eon out, you're my cousin, as is Nire.  Could you go upstairs and tell Natalie?"

            With a nod, Jander disappeared up the stair.  Just as he could hear them speaking, the buzzer to the lift shrilled out its call.  Nick barely glanced at the monitor before buzzing in the coroner and the two detectives.

            "Detective Knight."  The temp greeted him.  "Is Doctor Lambert okay?"

            Nick nodded silently.  "She was upstairs.  And since he came directly down here…"

            "Well, I'm glad to hear that," he said before beginning a quick examination of the body.

            The two detectives drew Nick off to the side slightly, which was relatively pointless.  After all, there was no one else in the room to hear their conversation.  Still, he followed without comment, wanting this to go as quickly and painlessly as possible.

            "Well, Knight, this should be a case of clear-cut self-defense.  Just tell us what happened."

            Nick sighed, the lies flowing easily out of his mouth.  "I was down here, watching TV.  Natalie and my cousin were upstairs, going through some of the junk in one of the storage rooms.  I heard someone coming up the back stairs, so I turned off the TV so I could hear better.  I thought it might have been Abel and Nire - one of my other cousin's who's visiting.  I had left the door unlocked and the alarm off so they could go in and out when they wanted, and I wouldn't have to let them in."

            He smiled sheepishly, as though he were blaming himself for it.  "But it didn't feel right.  Then he," Nick spat out the word as though it were burning his mouth, "came in, waving his gun around and yelling.  I told him to put it down, to calm down, and he wouldn't.  My gun wasn't on me.  He came running down the stairs as I was running for my gun, and he tackled me.  We fought, he shot at me.  I don't know how he missed, but he did, thank God.  I managed to get my gun, and… I shot him."

            "Did Natalie or your cousin see anything?" The body was being sent down the lift, now.  It was only Nick and the other two detectives left.

            "Not that I know of.  Do you want to ask them?"  He was trying to make this as easy for them as possible.

            "Nope.  Abel and… Nire weren't here?"

            Nick shook his head.  "When Abel was done working, he came back here, picked up Nire, and took her out shopping, or something like that.  I don't know when they're going to be back."

            The other detective, who had been silent up until now, grinned.  "Is your entire family nocturnal, Knight?"

            With a little chuckle, Nick nodded.  "What can I say?  We're night people, no pun intended."

            The two detectives chuckled.  "I think we're done here.  Thanks Knight.  Tell Dr. Lambert we're glad she's okay."

            With a nod, Nick thanked them and showed them out.  He got to work scrubbing the blood from the floor and fixing the mess.  As soon as the lift went down, Jander came and helped, ignoring Nick's protests.  They had the loft put back together in short order.

~~~~{@

            It was half and hour past dawn when Nire and Abel came home.  They were both dressed in completely new outfits, and Abel was moving like he had never been hurt.  While he still had that faraway look in his eyes, he was clearly listening to Nire as she talked.  And his eyes were wavering in and out of focus, but never did that go completely out of focus.

            He was clinging onto Nire's hand and focusing in on her voice, his grip on sanity.  His mind kept on flashing back to Kane, standing over his broken body, laughing and telling him that the little bitch was going to die.  Telling him that she cared nothing for him anyway, and once more, he would own him.  But then, Nire's hand would squeeze him slightly, as if she knew what he was thinking, and his mind would move on from the utter terror of that point to the pure relief of seeing the red hole appearing in his brother's forehead, and seeing the look of shock on the bastard's face as he fell backwards.  Dead.  Completely dead.  There was no way he could get his hands on Abel again.  His cohorts, yes, but never again Kane personally.  Abel did not want to let go of his savior.  She could do what she wanted with him now, hurt him as much as she wanted.  And now that she didn't have to pretend to protect him from anyone, she would.  But at least Kane was dead, and he would almost welcome pain from her.  Because it meant Kane was dead.  He was still terrified of her, and the pain she would cause.

            But Kane was dead by her hand.

            The lights were all off, save for one above the stove in the kitchen, when they stepped out of the lift.  Nick and Natalie had gone to bed already, and Jander appeared to be asleep on the couch.  Nire quieted her voice, finishing her sentence, and fell silent for a moment as the door to the lift rolled shut.  Abel wasn't aware enough to notice the damage that had been repaired, but Nire was.  There had been a *_lot* of blood and structural damage.  She assumed Jander had done a good job, and smiled proudly.  Her lessons had been well learned._

            "Well, kitten?" she asked quietly.  "Wasn't that the most kickass thing you have ever done?"

            Keeping his eyes fixed on the floor as was appropriate, he nodded, unsure of whether she wanted to hear it verbally or not.  Depending on if she hit him would be his answer.  But he had learned early on in his life that he got in less trouble if he didn't speak at all.

            With a yawn, Nire let go of his hand.  And, while he did not want to, he, too, let go.  "Jander and I are going home soon, kitten, prob'ly tomorrow morning.  We've vastly outstayed our welcome."  She paused when he whimpered quietly, causing him to flinch from fear of retribution for interrupting her.  She continued, however, after taking a break to yawn again.  "So you have to actually start thinking about if you're going to stay here or come with me or what.  But don't answer now," she warned him.  "Seriously think about it.  And you can change your mind whenever you want after you decide.  Mmkay?"

            He nodded again, his eyes fixed at her feet.  He had as much fun as he could have been expected to have, but he was still dreading tomorrow night.  One change from the norm didn't meant hat the rest of the time was going to be any different.  The next time, she would probably just lock him up in the room Nick and Natalie had given him.  And they wouldn't stop her, because odds were, they agreed that was how it should be handled.

            "I'm going to sleep, kitten," she told him.  "Are you going upstairs?"

            He whimpered almost silently, hugging himself, still staring at the floor.  That sounded as though she was telling him she was going to sleep down here, and he had to sleep upstairs.  Tonight, he didn't care what Nire did to him, he just did *_not_* want to be alone.  Not after… His stomach was twisting in disturbing knots again, roiling around and threatening to empty its contents.

            "Whassa matter now, sweetheart?" Nire asked absently, heading over to the couch.  He followed closely behind, for once wanting to stay within arms reach.

            "Nothing," he replied quietly, almost silently.

            "Yes there is."  She stopped attempting to tease a pillow out from under Jander's feet and straightened up.  He still kept his head down and his eyes on her feet, even when she moved so she was standing directly in front of him.  When he felt her fingers on his chin, he flinched and whimpered nervously.

            "Easy there, kitten."  She lifted his chin until he was looking into her eyes.  "You can look at me, you know."  She petted his hair as his eyes, slowly filling with tears, met hers for a few moments before wavering away.  "Want me to come upstairs with you, kitten?  Is that it?"

            He nodded tremulously, glancing at the vampire on the couch.  "We'll let him sleep," Nire said gently.  "As much as he claims he's fine and I say he's a-okay, he's still feeling sick and exhausted."

            Greatly relieved, but the fact that it would just be him and Nire making him nervous, he went upstairs, following slightly behind her.

~~~~{@

            Nick got the pleasure of actually being called into the precinct the very next *_night* to be questioned by the men from the IA.  Nire and Abel were gone when he woke up, and while Natalie fretted, he knew that the young man was in good hands._

            *_The vultures circle quickly around the scent of fresh meat, * he thought dryly as he drove to the precinct._

            As soon as he got there and parked the Caddy, he was ushered into an interrogation room.  Sympathetic looks were thrown his way by most of the people who were inside.  A few looked smugly satisfied, glad that the Knightmare was in bad with the IA for once.  It was odd sitting on the other side of the table while the two men lounged across from him, one in the chair, the other perched on the edge of the desk.

            The whole encounter was interesting.  Nick could only assume that the IA had been waiting to jump him.  Otherwise, there was no way they could have gathered all of the information they were throwing at him in the space of twelve hours.  And they were throwing *_everything* at him._

            He had to listen to them question and slander everything from his hunches and questionable behavior to the death of Schanke and Tracy being shot.  The thin leash that reigned in his temper was strained to the breaking point as they continued.  He *_had_* to stay calm, though.  The last thing he needed right now was a long investigation.  Not now.

            To keep his temper in check, he allowed his mind to recede from what was going on and let his mouth answer automatically.  He had much more important things to worry about than the indignity of the IA.  Such as, was he doing the right thing by marrying Natalie?  Already he had gone through this argument with himself over and over again.  How much would she be willing to give up for him?  How much was he willing to *_ask* her to give up?  Just because she claimed she was willing did not mean that she would not change her mind in a few years.  When it was too late.  And then…. Could he handle living and knowing her hate for all of eternity?_

            But that was in the future.  There were more immediate problems.  Most important being his Family.  There was the dual issue of both Janette and LaCroix.  Janette and Natalie had made a truce, he knew that.  And it seemed to be upheld, although that could merely be because neither he nor Natalie had seen much of the gorgeous vampire since she came back to town.  There was quite a large possibility that this was going to cause major problems between the three of them.  That was the last thing he wanted.  His sister was most definitely a major part of his life, he having relied on her for many years.  And if it turned out that his marrying Natalie would be an issue… Well, he did not want that tainting the wedding.

            Then, of course, there was LaCroix.  He already knew what the General's reaction would be, and was not looking forward to it.  Not another fight to spoil his mood.  The fight that would ensue was a certain thing, for LaCroix *_never_* approved of what he did.  The day he earned his Master's approval was the day hell froze.  And it would be worse that longer he waited to inform the surly vampire.  When this was over, no matter the mood of the ancient Roman, he would go to the Raven and tell him.  Then hope for the best.

            When the IA men decided they were done with him, he had to stifle sigh of relief.  If he had to stay for another second, he was going to kill the two men, and damn the consequences.  Leaving the precinct, he practically radiated rage.  Even Reese stayed away, letting Nick exit the building without attempting to speak to him.  It was comical the way that people parted as he came through, leaving him space.  But Nick did not see the humor as he left.

            Outside of the precinct, he drove off calmly.  But as soon as he was out of view, he pulled over to the side of the road, gripping the steering wheel in his hands, his knuckles white.  He needed to sit for a while and cool off.  There was no way he could go back to the loft this angry, nor could he go to the Raven.  He needed to take *_many_* deep breaths to calm down.  The IA decided they were done 'for the day'.  If they actually tried to question him again, he was going to seriously hurt someone.  This brought the question of, could Internal Affairs investigate itself?  Because this certainly seemed like some sort of vendetta and abuse of power.

            Eventually, he started up the Caddy and headed for the Raven, using the drive there to psych himself up for informing his Family of this new development.

~~~~{@

            The Raven was deathly quiet when he pulled up to the curb and parked in front of it.  He took a moment in the car to fortify himself before getting out and going to the back door.  Using the key Janette had given him, he let himself in.  Now that he was inside, he could hear barely audible music and see flickering candlelight coming from the direction of the bar.  That was where he could sense the two members of his immediate Family to be.  So, he squared his shoulders and walked out to where they were waiting for him.

            Janette smiled welcomingly at him, but it was LaCroix who spoke first after taking a sip of the bloodwine in his hand.  "Good evening, Nicolas.  And to what do we owe the dubious pleasure of your presence?"

            LaCroix was in a nasty mood tonight.  The joy that was oozing from his son as particularly irritating, seeing as how he was so despondent.  While his desolation came in cycles, once every few decades or so, Nick's happiness seemed to follow the same cycle, intensifying when LaCroix was at the lowest point.

            Nick decided to bite the bullet and come to his point without preamble.  "I asked Natalie to marry me."  He tensed, preparing for LaCroix's blowup.

            A pang went through LaCroix's heart at those words.  "And?" he asked emotionlessly.

            "And she said yes."  Nick tensed even more, waiting.

            There was a long silence.  Janette's eyes had grown wide, and she turned to watch LaCroix.  No apparent reaction was forthcoming.  He just watched Nick.  When he finally spoke, there was no emotion in his voice.

            "Congratulations, Nicholas."  Then he stood up, turned around, and walked out of the room.

            That was certainly unexpected behavior.  Just what was LaCroix planning?  Looking at Janette, Nick realized that just maybe there was nothing being planned.  The way she was staring after LaCroix made him think something different was up.  But she shook her head slightly before he could say anything and came out from behind the bar.  She hugged him and kissed his cheek, smiling happily and burying her reservations.  Nick deserved to be happy once in a while, and perhaps this time would turn out differently.  In any case, she would speak to Natalie, and soon.

            "Congratulations, Nicolas!  Have you set a date for the wedding?"

            "Not yet, but you will come, right?" He was honestly worried about that, and it showed on his face.

            "Of course." Janette tossed her raven-black hair and smiled at him.  "I wouldn't miss it for that world."  She lowered her voice for the next part of what she had to say.  "And LaCroix?  He is invited to come?"

            Nick actually had to think about that for a moment before nodding, and speaking softly.  "What's wrong with him, anyway?"

            Janette just stared at him, seemingly at a loss for words.  She finally mustered speech, and said, "If you had to leave Natalie behind, would you ever forget her?"

            "Of course not!" Nick exclaimed.  "But what's your point?"

            Janette sighed exasperatedly.  "You should go back to your fiancé, Nicolas."

            Nick's brow crinkled in confusion, but he understood that she wanted him to leave.  While he was not sure just what he had done to make her angry, he retreated without argument.  The whole idea had gone over exceedingly well, and he wasn't going to jinx it by doing anything other than what she wanted.

            So he left.

~~~~{@

            It wasn't until Nick was halfway home that his brain put the pieces together and he figured out what Janette had been alluding to.  She was comparing LaCroix's… infatuation with Fleur to his love of Natalie.  LaCroix?  *_Pining_* for Fleur?  The thought was preposterous.

            There was absolutely *_no_* comparison.

            LaCroix… Good Lord.  He had loved the innocence of Nick's sister.  He had been infatuated with the *_idea_* of Fleur.  Within days, weeks at the most, he would have tired of the girl and cast her aside, just as he did with most of his fledglings.  Nick did not want to see his little sister just like that any more than he wanted her to join him in the darkness.  Whatever LaCroix had thought he found attractive would disappear when she was brought across.

            Nick slammed the steering wheel with his hand.  It was different!  He was not getting what he had denied LaCroix, because *_he had denied him nothing*.  That cold, cruel heart could never understand the meaning of the word love.  And how could he even assume to 'fall in love' with Fleur in such a short time?  It wasn't possible._

            Nick knew he loved Natalie because he couldn't stand to be without her.  He wanted to protect her from the world, to be with her every moment of the day.  A warm, fuzzy feeling filled him whenever he thought of her.  He wanted to talk to her, to hear her opinions when he was making decisions.  When he was angry with her, he still couldn't help but want to be near her, and when she was angry with him, it made his insides feel squeezed together and icy.  He wanted to hold her when she had nightmares, and ease her fears.  He wanted to make love to her every night to review their devotion to each other.  And he was at times terrified that she was going to find someone new, better than him, and leave him.

            That was love.

            There was no way that LaCroix could feel any of that.  He was incapable of such emotion, of thinking of anyone but himself.  Janette was wrong.  LaCroix did not remember Fleur as anything other than a way to have more control of Nick.  And now, he was angry because he was losing that control.  So he had stalked off to make plans to wreak havoc.  He would kill Natalie to regain his control of Nick.

            Nick's face hardened into an uncompromising mask.  If he wanted to do that, he would have to get through him, first.


	26. Chapter Twenty Six

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 26/27

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to Mike and April, who are the only people giving me good reviews.

Author's Note: "Cellophane, Mr. Cellophane.  That should be my name, Mr. Cellophane.  You can look right through me, walk right by me.  And never know I'm there."  Yeah.  I know how Amos felt.

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

            Natalie sat at the kitchen table, angrily sipping a cup of lukewarm coffee.  It was probably something unwise to do when she was hopefully going to be going to bed soon.  Nick had tried to convince her to go sooner, but she flatly refused.  And when she snapped at him, he had retreated upstairs, wounded.  She would have gone to join him, had Nire and Abel decided to return at a reasonable hour.

            But now it was dawn and they were still gone.  When they returned, they were certainly going to receive a tongue-lashing.  *_Anything* could have happened to them by now.  While Toronto was a relatively safe city, she knew the dark side of it.  She had seen the death that being on the wrong street at the wrong time of the night could cause._

            Jander had tried to say something reassuring, to put her maternal instincts to rest, but the furious glare she shot him had quickly silenced his silver voice.  The thing that galled her was that they had left no note, no nothing.  Jander had just told her that they would be back around dawn.  Right.  When she had kids of her own…

            When the sound of the lift started, she jumped.  Her nerves were frayed, too.  Nick had been gone for a *_long* time early that night, leaving her (relatively) alone in the loft the night after… To say that made her more nervous would be redundant.  She fixed her gaze on the rolling door, waiting._

            Nire stepped out first, grinning happily.  Abel was behind her, a hint of a smile on his face, his eyes almost worshipful of Nire.  More cautiously worshipful, but hero worship was there, all the same.  As Nire noticed the look in Natalie's eyes, her grin faded, and she stepped slightly more in front of Abel, the gesture obviously protective.

            "Where have you been?" Natalie asked, refusing to let any anger seep into her voice.

            "Out wandering around the city.  Why?" A look of honest confusion passed over the girl's face.

            "Do your parents allow you out late at night, without telling anyone where you're going or leaving a note?"

            Nire blinked, her eyes widening slightly as though she couldn't believe that was what Natalie was mad about.  "Well, my mum and da live in a piss-ass little town where you can leave your doors unlocked whether you're home or not.  An' Khel 'n' Laer just expect me to tell someone.  An' I told Jander.  I'm sorry."

            "Where did you go?"

            That question made Nire evasive.  "Out and around.  We stayed on well-lit streets and didn't talk to any strangers."  She smiled cautiously, trying to get the humor to go over well.

            Natalie couldn't help but smile at the attempt to make peace.  But she still asked, "What could you two have been doing out until dawn?"  Her foot tapped impatiently.

            "Um… stuff."

            That answer was not good enough.  "What kind of 'stuff'?"

            Abel was standing behind Nire, more like *_hiding* behind her.  He looked absolutely miserable and frightened.  Seeing that, Natalie was directing her questions and her anger at Nire.  When she asked that question, he made a tiny, frightened noise._

            "Just stuff," Nire said, her eyes pleading for Natalie to drop it.  "Cross my hear, it wasn't illegal, we didn't kill anyone, we didn't destroy anything, we didn't steal anything.  We were just doing stuff."

            Deciding it wasn't worth it, Natalie let that go.  Looking at Abel, cowering behind Nire, she couldn't stay angry.  "If you decide to disappear again, tell either Nick or I, and come back at a reasonable hour."

            "Yes ma'am," Nire said cockily, nodding.  "But, seriously, I'm really sorry.  I didn't think it would matter how late we were out.  Sorry.'

            "I'm sorry," Abel whimpered.

            Natalie sighed.  "It's all right," she said, directing it more towards Abel.  "Just don't stay out so late next time, okay?"

            After they both nodded, she let it go.  And now she could go to bed.  "Good night, guys."

            "G'night," Nire said.

            As Natalie was heading up the stairs, she could hear Nire muttering, "Jesus Christ, she's going to be a good mother some day."

            A small smile spread across her face as she reached the top of the stairs.

~~~~{@

            Natalie's sleep that day was more fitful than it had been in a while.  Nightmares haunted her dreams, and not even Nick's comforting embrace could cause them to dissipate.  She woke up just as tired as she had gone to bed the morning before.  Nor was she in a pleasant mood.  She did not want to deal with the abrasiveness of Nire today.  In fact, she wanted her home to be *_hers* again, with just she and Nick inhabiting its spacious walls._

            God must have been listening to her prayers, because when she came downstairs to start making breakfast, Nire and Jander were packing up their things.  Nick leaned against the counter, sipping a mug of bloodwine and watching what they were doing with lazy interest.

            Nire looked up from where she was closing her backpack.  "Thank you a million times over for letting us stay here.  I know we've vastly overstayed our welcome.  Many thanks for not throwing us out.  Feel free to cheer now that we're leaving - we're used to it."  She smiled, slightly sardonically.

            Natalie had to seriously quell the urge to do just that.  Even though she really wanted them gone immediately, she forced herself to be polite and offered, "Do you want something to eat before you go?"

            Nire shook her head.  "No thanks.  If there's ever anyway at all that we can repay you…"

            "We were glad to let you stay," Nick said.  Natalie glanced at him oddly because his voice held no hint of a lie.  What had happened between last night and this night?  Then again, Nick had always been good at dissembling, a necessary skill for a vampire.

            Nire snorted.  "Right.  Sure.  Anyways, we can't thank you enough.  Seriously.  I am so not kidding that we are forever indebted to you."  Her foot tapped impatiently as she glanced up towards the catwalk, muttering, "Where the hell is that boy?  I wanna *_go*.  I miss my babies."_

            Natalie's forehead crinkled slightly as she went over to stand by Nick, ignoring the mug of blood in his hand.  He dropped a kiss on the top of her head, muttering into her ear, "Don't argue.  I'll explain later."

            She turned to look up at him, the question in her eyes.  Instead of telling her what he was talking about, he shook his head slightly.  The answer was given, however, when Abel came down the stairs, carrying his backpack.  He looked nervous, and Natalie immediately felt guilty for chastising him and Nire last night.  She should have known that it would scare him away, even if it wasn't directed at him.  She glanced up at Nick again, her eyes narrowed.  How could he expect her not to protest?

            "Please, Nat," he begged her, barely audible.

            No.  She would not acquiesce to this.  The trust levels that Nire and Jander evoked in her was only a little bit above nil.  There was no way she trusted that their intentions toward Abel were good.  At least when they were here, she knew that the young man was relatively safe.  She was *_not* going to let this go without at least a bit of argument._

            "Thank you for letting me stay here," Abel said quietly, rubbing his hands together in a nervous manner.

            About to argue, Natalie opened her mouth, but Nick beat her to it as the group of three began to walk toward the lift, Abel between the other two.

            "We were glad to let you stay.  You're welcome back any time.  Will you come back for Christmas?"

            Abel paused at the lift's door, glancing questioningly at Nire.  The girl spoke before Natalie could get a word in.  "It's past Christmas already where we're going, kitten."

            He turned to Nick.  "Can I?"

            With a gently simile, Nick responded, "Of course you can.  Is that a yes, then?"  Abel nodded.  "Well, come back and visit often, okay?"

            Abel nodded again, and Jander and Nire chorused a, "Good bye!  And thanks again!" Then the door to the lift closed and it began it's decent.  Nick had effectively blocked Natalie from getting a single word out.

            Furious, she whirled on him, her eyes flashing with anger.  "Don't you *_ever* do that to me again," she hissed._

            Nick cowered away from her anger.  "Please don't be mad at me, Nat.  Let me explain first."

            "No.  I don't care if he was really the one who kidnapped me and tortured me.  Do not ever do that.  Ever."

            He reached out to pacify her, but she stepped back, out of reach.  That hurt.  "Nat, would you *_please* listen to me?  I was talking to Nire before you and Abel woke up.  She was explaining to me why she had offered to let Abel live with her, and why she really hoped we wouldn't argue."_

            Although she was pissed at him, she was listening.  "Okay, okay.  Fine.  Just what did she tell you."

            "How much are you willing to believe?" he asked her.  "Can you take the next step from vampires to… wereanimals?"  Although she was looking at him skeptically, he could see that she was weighing the idea in her mind.  "Well, Abel was a wereleopard.  And Nire does for wereanimals what Janette does for vampires."

            "And you believed her?"

            "My sense of smell may not be up to par with other vampires," Nick said indignantly, "but I can certainly tell when someone is lying to me.  And she wasn't.  They'll take care of him, Nat.  And he *_really* wanted to go with her.  She'll know if he wants to come back, and she'll bring him back.  But if you had started arguing with them…" He drifted off.  "Please understand, Nat?  Please?"_

            She sighed, more a growl.  She hated it when he was right.  But that didn't stop her from being extremely angry with him.  And she could tell by the look on his face that he knew that.  "Fine, Nick, fine.  Whatever you say."

            His face fell from its hopeful look, turning miserable.  Still, she glared at him angrily.  There was no way she would forgive him that easily.  He sighed unhappily, looking away with guilt in his eyes.  Luckily for him, he was saved from the further wrath of her tongue by a quick buzz of the doorbell and the sound of the lift starting up.

            "It's Janette," Nick said, his voice slightly puzzled.  What in the world did she want?

            Natalie raised her eyebrows at him, but said nothing.  Fine - if he didn't want her to talk, then she wouldn't talk.  Childish, yes.  But she didn't care.  When the door to the lift opened, Janette stepped out, but stopped there.

            "Good evening Nicolas, Natalie."  She paused, her face slightly crinkling.  "What is that awful smell?  Who have you been letting in here, Nicolas?"

            He looked around, obviously sniffing the air.  "What smell?"

            "Ugh.  You can't smell that?  It's like… the stench that comes off a church, or that cross you own…"

            Nick shrugged.  He couldn't smell it.  "Whatever you say.  What are you doing here?"

            The look she shot him was not friendly by any means.  "Natalie, I was wondering if you would like to come with me for some, ah, girl talk.  Where Nicolas cannot hear us."

            "Sure."  Natalie's agreement was quick, getting it in before Nick could say anything.

            The two women were already on their way out before Nick could get his bearings enough to protest.  This was not the best time for Janette to just randomly want to speak to Natalie.  How did he manage to make every woman in his life angry with him at the same time?  Thus was his luck.

            "Don't worry, Nicolas," Janette said flippantly.  "I promise to bring her back in one piece."

            As the lift growled down to street level, Nick couldn't quell the tight knot of anxiety that had formed in his stomach.

~~~~{@

            Natalie sipped slowly at the glass of wine Janette had given her as they settled in the private apartments at the back of the Raven.  Janette was sipping a glass of slightly thicker, though of similar color, fluid.

            "You finally convinced Nicolas to commit," the raven-haired vampire said approvingly.  "Congratulations."

            "Thank you."  Natalie's suspicions were slowly creeping up.  She was beginning to regret leaving the safety of the loft.

            Janette shifted slightly in her chair, swirling the bloodwine.  "And you are going to ask him to bring you across, are you not?" she asked quietly.

            Nodding silently, Natalie was relieved by the turn the conversation was taking.  Safer grounds, as ironic as it was.

            Janette sighed.  "Then you need to know some things that Nicolas will not tell you."

            Natalie's only response was to raise an eyebrow slightly.

            "You are aware that he does not have the best… track record with fledglings?  Especially those he has intense feelings for?"

            "Well, yes,' Natalie admitted.  "But, he's taken my blood before…"  The ease with which she could say that was astounding.

            "It's different.  How much has Nick told you?"

            "Not a lot."  Her voice held disgust for Nick's closed-mouth tendencies.

            Janette made a commiserating noise before continuing.  "He will have to drain you to the *_very brink* of death.  Had he brought you across when he had the chance, everything would have been fine.  That was one of the few times he stopped at the right moment."_

            "So you're telling me that he doesn't know when to stop drinking, and that I should be aware of that," Natalie repeated, just to make sure.

            Janette's nod confirmed it.  "It might be a good idea to… have someone there, just in case."

            That did sound like a good idea.  As much as she loved Nick, after what happened last time… She didn't trust him with her life in that respect.  But the real question was, why?  She would have thought hat both Janette and LaCroix would be overjoyed to see her dead.  So why warn her of this?

            And because it truly did bug her and she wanted to know what plot they had, she asked.  "Why?  Why are you telling me all of this?"

            Janette didn't seem surprised by the question, having expected it, and even wondered about it herself.  But there was an answer.  "Nicolas' grasp on sanity when he met you was tenuous, and growing more unsteady all the time.  Since he met you, you have become his… grounding base.  And I dread to think what will happen when you die.  As much as he refuses to admit it, LaCroix knows this, too.  So I am warning you of the dangers, for my own best interests."

            Natalie smiled slightly.  At least she wasn't lying to make herself look more virtuous.  And she could handle that sort of reasoning.  She could feel Nick crossing the connection between them and gently touching her mind, making sure she was still okay.  His worry was *_very* apparent.  She caressed his mind a little to reassure him, feeling him withdraw after a moment._

            "All right," she said to Janette.  "You look like there's more."

            Janette sighed.  This was going into the failings of LaCroix, which she usually tried to stay away from.  "When Nicolas was a fledgling, LaCroix left out some important lessons in his training.  When you are brought across, as much as this will irritate Nicolas, it would be best if someone else trained you."

            Once more, Natalie raised an eyebrow.  She had to say, she agreed with Janette.  Regardless, she had been wary of being taught by Nick.  Odds were, he would try to protect her too much for lessons to really be of any value.

            "Like who?"

            "Preferably someone who is in the Family."  Janette paused before continuing.  "And LaCroix is the best instructor around here…"

            Natalie had to pause and consider that.  While, since having dealt more with the ancient vampire, she held an enormous amount of respect for him, she wasn't sure if she really believed that he wouldn't attempt to kill her at the first chance he had.  Would he really be wiling to instruct her in her new abilities?  She had no doubt that he was an excellent tutor, and that she could learn much from him, not only about vampires.  Of course, if he treated her the same way he had treated Nick…

            "It depends."

            Janette nodded, expecting that.  "Think about it.  If you are not constantly warring with him, he's actually quite pleasant to be around."  It was the truth, slightly edited, but still the truth.

            That, Natalie believed.  Nick certainly did seem to have a very biased view of the elder vampire.  But she would seriously have to think the whole thing over a lot, and come to some decisions.

            Janette shifted in the chair, leaning forward slightly, clearly moving into gossip mode.  "On to happier topics.  Have you two set a date for the wedding, yet?"

~~~~{@

            Nick sighed as he looked around the loft, aimlessly wandering.  It felt so empty right now, with everyone gone and Natalie off doing whatever with Janette.  He reached across their bloodlink once more, not going far enough so she was aware of the contact.  Just enough to make sure she was still okay.  It would be interesting to find out what the two women were talking about, if Natalie would be willing to tell him.

            He wandered up to the storage rooms, absently peering into open boxes, but not really seeing what was there.  Without a doubt, he was nervous about the prospect of Natalie becoming a vampire.  God knew he was terrified that she would end up hating him for it.  But he didn't know if he was even *_capable_* of doing it.  Mentally or physically.  If he did the same thing that he had last time… Few enough people had survived him to become his fledgling.  Never would he forget Alyssa…

            Perhaps he should ask Janette, or even LaCroix, to be there when the time came.  Just in case.  If anything went wrong, he would never forgive himself.

            Walking out onto the catwalk, he surveyed the grand space of the living floor of the loft.  The tree lights were on, casting a multi-colored glow on the black gloss if the piano.  Christmas was coming soon.  He had already bought gifts for Natalie, which was *_much* harder than it should have been.  He just didn't know what to get her.  Like a child, he had been searching through the loft every chance he had for what she might have gotten him.  Although he didn't know when she could have gone out to shop, he assumed that she must have somehow figured out a way.  After all, his fiancé was extremely creative.  Since she was kidnapped, he couldn't recall a single time that she had been out anywhere without him firmly plastered to her side.  Needless to say, he had yet to find anything._

            He wandered down to the piano and sat on the bench, lifting the cover of the keys.  He began to play, picking out a melody that was running through his head and adding harmony to it.  As the dreamy tones floated through the still air, Sydney ambled over and jumped up on the piano bench to sit beside him.  While Nick had always been a dog lover, he found that he didn't particularly mind the fat gray tabby.  He was actually relatively pleasant to have around.  It was really too bad that bringing animals across rarely worked.

            His mind drifted languidly, sailing through purple skies and candy clouds.  He wanted Natalie back at the loft now, back to where he knew she was safe.  But there was nothing he could do about that without further angering her, so his mind ventured on.  Eventually, it settled into the unforgiving sea of reality.  His fingers faltered on the ivory, and the piano fell silent.  Sydney's loud purring became more obtrusive in the sudden lack of noise.

            Nick's mind kept replaying the moment he had told Janette and LaCroix that he and Natalie were engaged.  Over and over, his pristine memory flashed back to that one moment when the words had left his mouth.  Seemingly of its own volition, his mind would zoom in on LaCroix's face, on the emotions lying there, quickly thrown behind a diffident mask.

            Over and over he heard himself say how he asked Natalie to marry him.  A quick look of hurt and betrayal flashed across LaCroix's face before an indifferent look fell in place.  Then, when he said that she had said yes… he couldn't even begin to describe the look that had appeared briefly on his father's face.  Anger warring with deep sadness, loneliness at an intensity that Nick didn't want to think about, worry, and more betrayal.  Then LaCroix had walked away.

            That made no sense, though.  None of those looks.  Well, anger, yes.  He could certainly understand how marriage would make LaCroix angry.  If it actually went through without a hitch, it was quite possible that it would loosen his hold on Nick.  And LaCroix could not stand to have his toy occupied elsewhere.  Well, Nick was beyond being sick of his twisted mental games.  If he had an issue with the whole thing, if he was going to be a danger to Natalie, then Nick had to know that now.

            He would go speak with the old Roman.  Perhaps, it would come to the matter of death for one of them, once more.  LaCroix never seemed to stay dead for long, though.

~~~~{@

            LaCroix wandered into his bedchamber, a few bottles of bloodwine cradled in one hand, an opened letter in the other.  He usually treasured the night such mail made its way to him.  But not tonight.  Tonight, he planned to get as drunk as he could.  Maybe read the letter, maybe save it for the proverbial rainy day.

            Sitting down at his desk, he took out a simple wooden box before he noticed a folded sheet of plain white paper in the middle of the flat surface of his desk.  Only marginally curious, he picked it up and turned it over, looking for a name.  Who would have been able to get into his room?  Perhaps whoever it was had left it with Janette, with instructions to give it to him.  Seeing nothing, he opened it.

            *_Just how would you prepare a woman from the 13th century for life in the 20th?  If you don't have an answer, forget about it. *_

            As soon as he read it, he tore it to shreds angrily, then cradled his head in his hands miserably.  He had no idea.  It wasn't possible, any of it.  Why had he gotten his hopes up in the first place?  It was just a bored child trying to mess with his mind.  The galling part was that she had succeeded.  As the years wore on, he was becoming a gullible old fool.

            He stood up again.  He needed more bottles of bloodwine.


	27. Chapter Twenty Seven

Author:  The Wanlorn

Title:  A World in a Grain of Sand 27/27

Summary:  This is a sequel to "Every New Beginning…"

Rating:  PG13

Spoilers:  I honestly don't know, so beware.

Distribution:  Ask, and ye shall receive.  Take without permission, then screw the Law of Three, I will cures you with the nefarious curse of…da da dum…WRITER'S BLOCK!!!!  BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Disclaimer:  Same as all of the last times, so far.

Thank Yous:  Thanks to Carla, my beta.  Thanks to Mike, April, Randy, and the guys at The Writer's Shack, who are the only people giving me good reviews.

Author's Note:  Yes!  I've reached 200 pages!  And 100,908 words!  Yay!  If anyone wants to know what Nire and Abel were doing those two nights they were off all alone, email me.  If enough people show interest, I might put the pen to paper.  Also, if you want to know what happened to him once Nire took him back to her home, email me about that, too.  For now, read this, the last chapter.

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

****

            Nick had lost much of his momentum by the time he reached the Raven.  He purposely avoided the room where he felt Janette and Natalie to be, and he did his best to shield his presence from them.  Perhaps he should wait until Natalie was gone.  Perhaps not.  He paused outside the door to the room he could sense LaCroix in and knocked softly.

            When no answer, no stirrings within were forthcoming, he considered just walking away.  Instead, he cracked the door open and, upon hearing no protests, he opened it further.  The scene inside gave him pause, but he still went through the door, a spark of sympathy flaring within him.

            LaCroix slumped across his desk, clearly out cold, multiple empty bottles that used to hold bloodwine scattered around him.  It took a massive amount of bloodwine to render a vampire of LaCroix's age to such a state.  Nick would guess that the General had consumed perhaps twice that amount.

            Relatively sure of his safety, Nick advanced to stand beside the slumped over vampire.  He curiously noted shreds of white paper littering the floor.  A plain wooden box, the cover open, drew his attention.  Whether or not this would qualify under the category of snooping was up for debate - after all, it *_was_* left out in the open.  His curiosity getting the better of him, Nick picked up the box to examine its contents.  Apparently, it held a multitude of letters.

            Nick glanced at LaCroix once more to make sure he was still out.  Who could blame him for being curious?  Guiltily, he opened a few and checked the dates and who they were from.  There were mostly names he didn't recognize, a few from Janette, and they were dated from the present back to… Nick's eyes popped wide open.  Back to before he was born!  These were letters from fledglings of LaCroix, from Family.  Nick wasn't even aware that 'The Vampire Express', a sardonic name given to the mail system created by vampires, had been around that long.  With the evidence so firmly set before his face, he had to admit that he had once again assumed the worst of LaCroix and been shown wrong.  His Master did keep contact with his fledglings, he didn't just abandon them as Nick had assumed.

            He gently replaced the box, and stood, regarding LaCroix for a moment.  Right now, he could just leave, and his presence would never be known.  But… he did feel kind of bad for LaCroix.  He looked so unhappy, so uncomfortable, slumped across the desk like that.  With a sigh, Nick carefully cradled the insensible vampire in his arms and moved him to the bed.  LaCroix never stirred.

            Nick hadn't thought it was possible for a vampire to become so inebriated.  It never crossed his mind that sheer mental and physical exhaustion could render him thus.  Ever so carefully, Nick eased off his boots and arranged him so he at least looked comfortable.  Then Nick left, his purpose for coming entirely forgotten.

~~~~{@

            Later that day, Natalie snuggled deeper into Nick's sleeping embrace.  He murmured sleepily and closed his arms tighter around her.  A happy sigh escaped her lips as she smiled complacently.  Oh how her life had changed in the past couple days!

            The bastard who had kidnapped and hurt her was dead and she was well on her way to healing.  Nick was there to support her when she needed it.  Her home - her Nick's home - was finally empty again.  Possibly too empty, but empty none-the-less.

            More importantly, she and Nick were engaged.  They were going to be wedded.  The ring would be on her finger, and everything would be official.  She was certain that it would last for a long while, if not forever.  And she would be brought across.  While some aspects of becoming a vampire were not something she would enjoy, such as having to drink human blood, there were definitely some benefits.  One of them being she now had eternity to find a cure.  She wasn't hampered by her mortal lifetime.

            Nick still loved her, in spite of it all, and she was going to become Mrs. de Brabant Knight.  Yes, life was good.

*Fin*

(A/N:  Well, it's done.  This is finally done.  I can't believe it.  203 pages, 101,616 words, size twelve Times New Roman font.  This is certainly the longest thing I've written so far.  Definitely good.  I hope you enjoyed it!  Thanks for coming along for the ride.  While it may not have been enjoyable for all of you, it certainly was for me.  Let me remind you once more, if you liked Nire and Jander, they're featured in more fics of mine.  Check out "For the World is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky" and "All the World Before Me Passing By".  And keep an eye out for a possible sequel to this.)

~~May 27, 2003~~

**Answers**

And here, I answer/comment on whatever reviews I've gotten at ff.net.  It goes in alphabetical order, so, look for your name.

Ayana - I figure vampires and elves and werewolves all go together, and if vamps are unknown to the mortal world, why not other stuff?  I hope the subplots didn't get too confusing.  And (SPOILER AHEAD), I think I might have come up with a way to bring Schanke back (SPOILER FINISHED).  Thanks for the review!

Cj - I hope you continued reading after chapter 8.  ;-)  Thanks for the review!

Dana - Well, Nire's an original character, and her attitude is meant to rankle, most of the time.  ::shrugs:: What can I say?  Thanks for the review!

Elyssalyn - I'm sorry that you lost track of the story.  I guess that just shows my failings as a writer - I tried to make Jander and Nire as (relatively) self-explanatory as possible, so people wouldn't get lost.  Thanks for the review!

Knightmuzic - I'm glad you enjoyed the first couple chapters.  And I hope the rest of it was relatively okay.  Thanks for the reviews!

Lia - Well, I hate to say, but there really was no basis to my plot.  It kind of fell apart after the first couple chapters, so I abandoned it.  And, yeah, Nire pretty much is an omniscient, shameless girl.  But, yeah!  Morbid curiosity!  That's the first time I've gotten anything like that!  And, while I know it wasn't meant as a compliment, thanks!

Love Of My Life - Yes, I am a mind-reader, what can I say.  And eventually, in 'For the World', you'll find out what happens to Abel once Nire takes him home.  Thanks for the reviews!

Mindy - Aha!  Another Farscape fan!  If I hear anything about a movie/the series being picked up by another network, I'll be sure to tell you, along with FK DVDs, which I heard were coming out later this year.  Thanks for the reviews!

Nisa - Sorry, about not giving you guys a heads up.  They took over the loft for complicated reasons that I don't have enough room to explain here.  Suffice to say, this story's really part of a bigger set of stuff I'm writing, and it would make more sense if everyone had read the Mother Fic and was into that one.

Randy - Silence, young boy!  I will get around to making up names for the chapters when I get around to it!  Feel free to email me any ideas you have…  And, yes, you do give good reviews, your name just didn't pop into my mind when I was typing.  My apologies.  ;-)

Rouen French - Hmmm… I think I've replied to everything you've said… All I can say is that I'm not sending you the chapters early anymore, cuz then I don't get any reviews.  ;-P  And hurry up and update Eidolon!

Splinter - ::bows down to the god of informative reviews::  Thank you lots for your reviews!  Hmm… I betcha Elminster would have a handy cure for vampirism… Interesting…  And thanks for the translation for Nire's cruddy Spanish.  :-P

Tracey - cross my heart, Nat will at some point become a vamp.  Nick accepts Tracy as a vamp cuz he doesn't have to worry about her hating him as much as he has to worry about Nat hating him.  And the height discrepancy is because all those other fanfics have brainwashed all of us.  ;-P  And about 16-year-olds not being able to play concert piano, I seriously suggest you don't talk about things you don't know.  I'm 16, and I've played the original Moonlight Sonata score in concerts before, so that is certainly within reason.  Yes, Nire is a MarySue, I'm sorry that I forgot to warn you guys before.  :-( I coulda sworn I had…

Once more, thanks for all the reviews, guys!


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